A little girl to her mother: "Mom! i have come to know the boy next door have a pennis like a peanut"
Mom: " Do you mean its little"
girl: " No Mom! Its salty.

A man forgot to zip up.So a lady tells him:U LEFT yr GARAGE open.Man asks:DID U C MY BLACK MERCedes parked INSIDE?No,she said JUST A MINI COOPER with a FLAT TIRE

Bob calls in to his job:
"Hey, boss I'm not coming to work today. I'm really sick. I got a headache, stomach ache, and my legs hurt, so I'm not coming into work."
The boss says:
"You know Bob, I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife, and tell her to give me sex. That makes me feel better, and I can go to work. You should try that."
2 hours later Bob calls:
"Boss, I did what you said, and I feel great! I'll be at work soon. By the way, you got nice house.

FATHER: How are your grades, son?
SON: Under water, Dad.
FATHER: Under water? What do you mean?
SON: They're below C level.

STUDENT: But I don't think I deserve a zero on this exam.
TEACHER: Neither do I, but it's the lowest mark I can give you.

Thought for the Days!!!
if you call your mother as MUM,
What will you call Mother's younger
sis and elder sis?
Answer : MINMUM & MAXIMUM


Alrite to be continued on Monday.Love you all

Girlfriend:Are you sure you love me and no one else?
Boyfriend:Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday

Teacher:"Can anyone give me an example of Coincidence?"
Johnny:"Sir, my mother and father got married on the same day same time."

The rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and the direction of this love is same to as increment or decrement of the bank balance.

A boy in love with a girl, continues to be in love with her and a girl in love with a boy, continues to be in love with him, until or unless
any external agent(brother or father of the gal) comes into play and break the legs of the boy.

Newtons Law of Romance
LOVE CAN NEITHER BE CREATED NOR BE DESTROYED,
IT CAN ONLY BE CHANGED FROM ONE GIRL FRIEND TO ANOTHER

A man on wife's BIRTHDAY had no money,so he sent a cheque 100 kisses.When he returned home his wife said
"THANKS 4 the CHEQUE I GOT IT CASHED 4M BANK MANAGER"

woman:"last night i dreamt of u buying me a diamond necklace"
man:"tonight, go to sleep and enjoy wearing it"

Teacher: What r the people of Turkey called?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: They r called Turks, now What r the people of Germany called?
Student: They r called Germs

U just dey finish work dey go. Carry on

A Nurse come in Doc's Room.
Docs Asks: Why is ur one Boob out of ur Shirt?
Nurse ans:
Oh! These medical students never keep the things at place after use.

BCuZiMBlaCk:

U just dey finish work dey go. Carry on

Yea bro.This would help some people through their day today

A baby boy & baby girl making bath in bath tab.
baby Girl saw down of boy and asked.
can i touch your peen,
OH NO NEVER.
you have already broken your own

Man: please give me black colour condom
shopkeeper:why black colour condom?
man:my friend's dead so i want to share the sadness with his wife tomorrow night

A woman goes to a doctor & said: doctor! can u make another hole near my v---na?
Dr: why?
woman: business is doing good, so i'm planning to open a new branch

A mans occupation
is 2 stick his coqulation
up a womens ventalation
2 increase the population
of the younger generation
if ya wanna demonstration
please lie down

Always keep a picture of ur wife in ur wallet look at it when u r in trouble u will feel that other problems r not as big as this one

Teacher:"Now,children,if I saw a man beating a donkey n stopped him,what virtue would I be showing?"
Student:"Brotherly love

A girl says to her boyfriend, One kiss and I'll be yours forever.
The guy says thanks for the warning!

Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago, he hasn`t come back yet!
Santa: Why don`t u cook something else.