Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous - Fashion (3) - Nairaland
Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Fashion / Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous (25772 Views)
DPO Slaps Oyo Tailor, Charges Him To Court Over Poor Job / See What Ladies Wear These Days To Burn Belly Fat / See The Perfect Description Of Girls These Days (pix) (2) (3) (4)
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (Reply) (Go Down)
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by dominique(f): 10:46am On May 01 |
Some people are not comfortable wearing other people's used clothes, theyre content with what they have. Some see it as insulting or belittling if they're given used clothes. I have a sackful of clothes my children are no longer wearing, I only give them out to people that ask or I use style to ask if they need them. Op should politely tell the guy that l if he doesn't want or need the clothes, he can give them back. Life no suppose hard like that 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Nice2023(m): 10:46am On May 01 |
nifemi25: U do something for someone and he or she refuses to say thank u and u expect the donor to be happy. I want to ask u,are u normal at all? Is this the kind of generation of women we now have. I believe people like u are the ingrate the OP is talking about. If u can't make reasonable contributions pls,avoid topics like this. Do u know what gratitude is? Read about it and stop fooling around. |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Gorgeous1guy(m): 10:49am On May 01 |
You were painted because u didn't see the person u dash clothes wear them?? This is quite funny to me. Once u dash something to somebody, then it's no longer your business to monitor how the new owner uses his things. Concentrate on doing your own and forget about it.....except if u plan to take the glory by letting everyone know u are the giver. Give, then move on! |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Kevineleven(m): 11:03am On May 01 |
nifemi25: Exactly bro, he must have kept the clothes for special events. Op help people and clear your mind . Hope say no be him type dey use charity to brag like if not for me hunger for finish am. |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by LagbajaTheBEREAN: 11:04am On May 01 |
I've done this before, man, truth be told, I was a bit taken aback by the receiver action but with more growth and self awareness, I learnt the actions of the receiver shouldn't deter me from helping others as I've also received help from others too. |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by tellwisdom: 11:08am On May 01 |
Nazgul: What if cloth no be him problem? Even if wishkid or Dafildo dash me him most expensive cloths…i might end up using it to clean oil stain on my GEN. 1 Like |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Aragon001: 11:11am On May 01 |
Change that topic to helping people not helping the poor. My family suffered something similar. My parents lend a helping hand to a church member who attends the same church with them. She is from the same tribe/ethnic group as my dad. They were throw out of a government residence in idi-araba, mushin where they resided. And we decided to accommodate this woman last son. Which we did for more than 5years. During that period their late father pension due to errors was not paid after his demise for many years. My parents used their contacts to assist in getting this pension paid to them. The first son of this woman after collecting the money ran away with it leaving his mom homeless. After what he did, my parents still helped in securing apartment in the same compound for her and her last son so they can have a place to live. Guess what they did! Within a year this people change and showed my family their true characters. They became hostile, picked quarrels with all the neighbors including my family. This woman first son after squandering all his father pension came back to stay with the mom. He was the catalyst that started all the problems in the compound. These people fought every tenants in the compound. They are not the first to stab my family in the back after rendering assistance. Many have done the same but not on scale that this woman and her sons have done. This has really change my perception about helping people most especially people from the same tribe/ ethnic group as me. 1 Like |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Aragon001: 11:15am On May 01 |
Father4all:There are jean that is more than 20k oh. Some jean are sold about 100k in Nigeria. 1 Like |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Fujiyama: 11:16am On May 01 |
ravensckar: ^^^ Charity can be a minefield.  While some givers may do what they do for less than noble reasons, there are some who want to give a helping hand, no strings attached. Some people may have needs but are too shy to ask or just don't know how to go about asking. Every single day, some people with more than enough (clothes or whatever) correctly assess the situation of those around them and give out what they have - and the recipients are genuinely grateful. It happens all the time. Its a bit of a stretch to say those who gift out used clothes are saying they are 'better' than the recipients. Some of those who give may have that mindset but not all givers think that way. ravensckar: ^^^ Maybe its because clothing is such a personal thing. I don't think a used car gifted to someone would have the same reaction... |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by oyeb15: 11:20am On May 01 |
It's bad to be good always. Even when I assist my younger ones in a dare state of need, they will be telling me later that... did they request or ask me to help them? I gifted my pastor neighbor some coke drinks during my baby birthday. I was surprised to see them on d dump hill after some days. It pained me cos d drinks were not even enough for us but I just gave them out of love. I rather look away these days cos people are ingrates 1 Like |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Dundalk(m): 11:22am On May 01 |
Aragon001:the same Jean would be sold to someone for 10k.. They just dey Maga people jo.. Forget..  |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by capnies: 11:23am On May 01 |
HE'S YOUR NEIGHBOUR AND YOUR FRIEND, SO CALL HIM WHILE DISCUSSING OTHER THINGS YOU CAN CHIP IN AND ASK HIM IF THOSE CLOTHES DIDN'T SIZE HIM FROM THERE, YOU BOTH COULD SOLVE THE PROBLEM.AND BRING PEACE |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Rockyfancino(m): 11:24am On May 01 |
Typical human nature. First rule is that do not give unsolicited helps, it can backfire many times as everyone is not the same. Some will appreciate, many will even devalue the what is given is below them. Even the ones that ask for help can sometimes later turnaround to harm you when they start becoming entitled. Only give when it's really asked for, or use your gut to determine who to give to and don't always be available. Being too available to helps can put you in the most uncomfortable position sometimes. Live this life with wisdom. 2 Likes |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Orobadmeat: 11:27am On May 01 |
You don dash am clothes,comot Body na,why you dey loud am |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Maliqcious: 11:29am On May 01 |
So you give person cloth they look out whether he wear am? Kukuma ask for the clothes back na. Seriously your assumption is kinda senseless. |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Stevenbright(m): 11:30am On May 01 |
Testiebobo: One thing I have come to understand in dealing with people is that don't help people if they didn't ask for the help because they mostly will not appreciate. Also, even the ones that ask of you, make sure you don't always offer the full help or at least delay it even if you can offer it right away because if the assistance seems too effortless, they won't still appreciate it. Infact, they will likely come back with a higher demand soon with the entitlement that what they are asking for is nothing to you. 1 Like |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by tarboshi(m): 11:31am On May 01 |
Why insist on him wearing the clothe you gave him? Àbi you wan USE HIM? |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Wiljemz777(m): 11:37am On May 01 |
[quote author=Testiebobo post=129723048]In this life not everybody you see really deserves a helping hand. I can tell you that some poor people are proud than some elites. We once had a neighbour who we were very close to. As in family-friends. So one day i saw the trouser that my friend was wearing, the trouser was under-sized for him because he had grown taller than the trouser's length. And that is even one of his best trousers he wore to church. So one day i picked some of my favourites clothings and jeans trousers even palm shoes. I ironed the clothes and some trousers and presented it to him. He was very glad and happy and showed his mum, the woman pretended to be happy about it sha. But till date, i have never seen my friend wearing anyone of them. The thing pain me o because i still loved the clothes and shoes i gave him. I am even confused maybe it is my friend or his mother that are ingrate. What do you call this type of attitude? It happened to me as well… I bought a nice and grade okrika suit for someone around 2019 and couple o weeks later I saw the clothes on someone’s neck. I was glad sha because at least some someone wore it and God knew I did it out of love. This is the same person I gave three months old deck to and gotv decoder and still have the guy to tell my wife that he didn’t really fancy such because it was below his tatse. Once, I also implored my wife to give out the clothes she doesn’t wear even though they’re in great shape. The woman still behaved as if she was better despite having nothing appealing to put on. Though, I wouldn’t stop giving no matter what happens because I am doing because no one but God who has put it in my mind to be kind and generous. |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by iSense247: 11:39am On May 01 |
Testiebobo:My most cherished clothes were given to me by my pastor and another deacon in my church. Though I didn't start wearing those clothes immediately I was given but I am wearing them till now. I'm talking about gifts I received in 2018. So the person may preserve it for future use. However, the best gift to dash out is not material but money. Let the person decides what he use the money to do. Finally, don't regret doing good no matter what because you are not doing it for man but indirectly unto God. |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by johnzadok: 11:41am On May 01 |
Oga if actually you gave out to your neighbor or friend what they do with what you gave them it's not of your interest...you don't need to monitor people to know if they are putting on or wearing the dressings nor shoes you gift to them... Let them decide what they do with it you as a person you have fulfilled your spirit will and God's will be reaching out to people and He sees your heart and He will reward you. And don't forget some people don't rush in using what they are giving some it might take time. And don't forget it's never a must that what you gift people e.g clothes they must wear it directly, some still de gift it out, while some they will keep it for a while before wearing it, some can even wear it in your presence. And in the world of today if you gift people clothes, shoes and you noticed they have not been using it and you asked, they will read several meanings to it like did you put something... |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by ravensckar(m): 11:42am On May 01 |
[quote author=Fujiyama post=129727341][/quote] This your response is quite enlightening. It's typical of someone who is well versed. You did hit the nail on the head with your points. Cloth is a bit of a personal thing I agree completely. Even I that I'm typing, if someone gifts me a used car or house I won't reject it. 1 Like |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by okerekingsley90: 11:43am On May 01 |
VinnyBaba: Reasonable comment here 1 Like |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Lekan239(m): 11:50am On May 01 |
Nazgul:the price u give for that stock Jean is not accurate... its way lesser... I deal on male wears in wholesale prices in Ado-Ekiti Tanimola Collections at oja oba. Contact me for you affordable stock Jean, baggy, roundneck, shirt and so on... we waybill to various locations in Nigeria also.. zero. 8 zero. Six. 9. 0. 1. 2. 7. 5. 3..... you can chat us on WhatsApp also Our stock Jean go as low as 10k-14k depending on the quality |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Father4all: 11:59am On May 01 |
[quote author=Aragon001 post=129727325] There are jean that is more than 20k oh. Some jean are sold about 100k in Nigeria.[/quote. I know but not in Nigeria ] |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Doylestown92(m): 12:00pm On May 01 |
Reminderz: After helping him, he still watches him in undersized clothes everyday. That's painful. Even if he collects back the clothes, he is justified. |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Fujiyama: 12:00pm On May 01 |
ravensckar: ^^^ There you go Most people won't have a problem with a used car or house - I know I wouldn't. And for those who have such a big problem with used clothing - they need to think of all the people who travelled out of this place to much colder countries in the dead of winter, with nothing more than sweaters, jackets and other warm clothing gifted to them by others. Those clothes could literally mean the difference between falling seriously ill in a new location or settling down smoothly. P.S. I've edited that mangled post I made earlier. |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by CaptainFM1: 12:04pm On May 01 |
Testiebobo: When you give you shouldnt be bother about what the receivers do with your alms. Front what you wrote up there, it shows you haven't giving freely. Take your mind off it. Your friend might also have been led to give them out too by the same spirit of giving. He could have seen someone whose situation is worse than his. |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Perocom(m): 12:10pm On May 01 |
VinnyBaba: You are the only one who seem to understand the situation in the Op's post. Exactly my thoughts, if people don't ask for your help, its safer to wait rather than intervene in their seemingly helpless situation. My cousin brother was killed by witchcraft for gifting an old man N500 to help the poor man, but the poor man had other ideas and took the money to their coven where he was remoted and killed by accident. Some poor people are deeply frustrated and bittered that your Godly intervention could be interpreted negatively. May God help us to be able to discern and identify those who genuinely need our help, majority are wolves in sheep clothings. 1 Like |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by EzeG: 12:13pm On May 01 |
IT'S NOT EASY TO HELP PEOPLE, BUT WE UNDERSTAND, HELP PEOPLE WHEN YOU HAVE ENOUGH NOT WHEN YOU HAVE LITTLE YOU START SHARING IT AND YOU EXPECTING GLORY, IT THOSE NOT WORK THAT WAY. IF YOU WANT TO HELP, YOU HELP, IF YOU DON'T WANT IT'S NOT BY FALSE. |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by barinedan(m): 12:20pm On May 01 |
Your conclusion is wrong, and besides it's not proper to start monitoring people if they used what you gave them or not, that should not be your business. Do you expect them to worship you? Or you expect the guy to start wearing the clothes immediately and shouting your name on all the streets that you gave him clothes, by that you will be fulfilled? You don't have right to tell people when to use whatever item you have given to them. It is at their discretion. If they want to sell the items and use the proceeds for something more pressing to them at that moment, it's their choice. You should be asking God for your reward |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by Lessel: 12:22pm On May 01 |
My dear, what he said is a general trend. My heart has beenbriken several times due to such issues. Let your heart be well guided before helpingthe needy. Nazgul: |
| Re: Helping The Poor These Days Is Very Dangerous by QueenRebecca(f): 12:23pm On May 01 |
dominique: But these people are comfortable wearing Okirka and bendan selekti used by Oyinbos |
Zonju Foods Celebrates Queen Of Aso Winners With Iyanya In Style / Miss Plus Size Nigeria 2012 (Pictures) / Innovative Footwears From Recycled Tires.
(Go Up)
| Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 75 |