;d

@op,you can only apply these when you are in love becos over 65% of relationships are not based on love for one reason or the other.

@op i fink you made a mistake 4 not including EGO

La Parisienne:

@OP
Have we met before? Lolz 

This thread and your comments tell a lot about your personality, in a positive way. Keep doing what you are doing

Btw, I agree with the post.

Thanks Bellissima!
Lol, we met in Cuddler's thread. . . .

ifihearam:

@op,you can only apply these when you are in love becos over 65% of relationships are not based on love for one reason or the other.

I don't know the basis for your statistic up there, but I tend to agree that there are relationships that aren't based on love. Some have even argued that love (as we know it from books and movies) doesn't really exist, that people just go with those they can tolerate. And if you look around you you might agree with that school of thought. But that's a topic for another day.

@richy:

@op i fink you made a mistake 4 not including EGO

Lol. It's not my write-up o, as I stated clearly. I guess the reason they didn't include ego was cos we all have that, just in varying degrees. It just becomes unhealthy when it's exhibited in very high doses.

.

^^ Mr Mind, this your trademark full stop, is it a sign of agreement or sulking?

It is a sign that this thread is as useless as the full stop

^^^ Ok sir, even though 'full stop' is actually not useless. I do hope a few peeps have learned something though

@Chima, pele. Whatever the problem, is the Lord is able. Amen.

queensmith:

Is that what you tell yourself? Describe a scenario where outrightly lying to your partner serves as protection?

Like when you tell your wife on the phone that your kid is doing well and recovering after a brief illness,while infact, he has just been moved to the emergency room and his health status changed to "very critical".

Like when you have four flats in the middle of no where and your already hysterical wife calls. . . .and you just say "hey, I'm fine, just in a little hold up, should be home soon"

You lie at moments when the truth wouldn't serve any other purpose besides cause more panic and hysteria.

Erm, that is simply giving her false hope. If she's genuinely believing the child is better and throws a party for his recover then the child dies nko? At least the truth will have prepared her for the worst.

Your WIFE should know if there is something wrong with her husband. Hiding the truth from her will make her ignorant of the facts, theres nothing honourable about that

what is the nest step to take when u start feeling ur wife don't love u any more, she hardly talk to u with respect anymore even when it come to sex leave that aside fear will not even allow me to say it out from my mouth any more but i still love the child she gave me and i don't  want to raise him single parents i am confused becuz love anxiety is killing slowly.

NESTPRESID:

what is the nest step to take when u start feeling ur wife don't love u any more, she hardly talk to u with respect anymore even when it come to sex leave that aside fear will not even allow me to say it out from my mouth any more but i still love the child she gave me and i don't  want to raise him single parents i am confused becuz love anxiety is killing slowly.

Why hasn't anyone replied this fellow nah? Seems like he's in genuine need of advice. Abeg peeps your advice is needed here.

@NESPRESID, bro I don't think it's healthy for you to be afraid to ask your own wife for sex. I have a feeling you have allowed things to go on for so long in the wrong direction.

I still think it can be rescued though. Communication is key. What you want to do is find out why she acts the way she does and what she thinks about your marriage. Knowing what the problem is, is getting half way to finding a solution. So talk to her bro. I wouldn't know what the situation is exactly that makes you afraid of talking to her but if you really want to save your marriage like you said this is the first place to start.

If your wife don't want to have sex with you, she doesn't have to. It is her TOTO.

Mrs, Chima:

If your wife don't want to Be Intimate with you, she doesn't have to. It is her TOTO.

C'mon Chima, be fair to the man. You know there's a problem here when the man is afraid to ask his wife for sex and she doesn't respect him.

MarcAnthon:

C'mon Chima, be fair to the man. You know there's a problem here when the man is afraid to ask his wife for sex and she doesn't respect him.

If she doesn't respect him outside of sex then that is an issue but if he feels disrespected because she doesn't wants to have sex then he has an issue.

He need to find out why she doesn't want to have sex before he make assumptions without communicating with her.

Mrs, Chima:

If she doesn't respect him outside of sex then that is an issue but if he feels disrespected because she doesn't wants to Be Intimate then he has an issue.

He need to find out why she doesn't want to Be Intimate before he make assumptions without communicating with her.

Now you're talking. Pretty much same thing I told him - communication is key here.

I want to applaud the wife for denying the chatter some nookie.   

Mrs, Chima:

I want to applaud the wife for denying the chatter some nookie.   

Hope you will cry with her when he sends her disrespectful azz packing or when he starts getting it outside huh?

MarcAnthon:

Hope you will cry with her when he sends her disrespectful azz packing or when he starts getting it outside huh?     

Nope.  I would be sleeping sweetly with my baby.    Be right back, got something on the stove.

Mrs, Chima:

Nope.  I would be sleeping sweetly with my baby.    Be right back, got something on the stove.

wicked woman

Please mail my share over o. I need some home cooked meal in my tommy

Mrs, Chima:

Nope.  I would be sleeping sweetly with my baby.       Be right back, got something on the stove.   

^^^ Shows that not every one that helps you during crisis is your friend.

Phate07:

There is always communication problems in relationships whether bad or good.

Yes due to different ideologies and backgrounds. I think a way out is to both establish a firm standard / reference for daily living. If you both are Christians (I'm not saying that Christians don't have communication problems too oh) you should make God's word (His principles and values) your driving point.

NESTPRESID:

what is the nest step to take when u start feeling ur wife don't love u any more, she hardly talk to u with respect anymore even when it come to sex leave that aside[b] fear will not even allow me to say it out from my mouth any more[/b] but i still love the child she gave me and i don't  want to raise him single parents i am confused becuz love anxiety is killing slowly.

Obviously there is some guilt that you are living with. Tell her the truth and let it set you free. When couples are true to themselves, sex comes naturally but when grudges, lies and secrets come in, the whole house would be tense, everyone would be edgy and the sex would be as if with a log of wood.

Thanks to u all for ur words I pray God to give wisdom to live this life bcuz wisdom is the only key to all after God, I hv tried many skills b4 i cried out here bcuz i knw many are here with different thought and reason of life, i m just less than 2 yrs in my marriage and God bless us with a child, many look for it and they never have but i never know what she want, when she was preg of my baby she was the one who choose where she want to hv the baby in the world and i did it just to hv happiness in my home i don't care how much it will cost if she demand i must do it for her except i don't hv. I help in cooking not only that in every thing at home hoping that will bring joy still zero, i hv decided to come down to Nija so i can seek for divorce i m and tired i am too young to die i just newly complete 30 yrs so i am too young to die.

Look those of u never married go for long date b4 u try marry bcuz this is what i m suffering now all my relationship was phone relationship with her any time i invite her to the country i am she only spend moths and go back she silent all her way of life now i am in hell but i pray God change her for me b4 we come down to nija so that this divorce in my mind can stop.

Thanks to u all 4 ur advice

NESTPRESID:

what is the nest step to take when u start feeling ur wife don't love u any more, she hardly talk to u with respect anymore even when it come to sex leave that aside fear will not even allow me to say it out from my mouth any more but i still love the child she gave me and i don't  want to raise him single parents i am confused becuz love anxiety is killing slowly.

NESTPRESID:

Thanks to u all for ur words I pray God to give wisdom to live this life bcuz wisdom is the only key to all after God, I hv tried many skills b4 i cried out here bcuz i knw many are here with different thought and reason of life, i m just less than 2 yrs in my marriage and God bless us with a child, many look for it and they never have but i never know what she want, when she was preg of my baby she was the one who choose where she want to hv the baby in the world and i did it just to hv happiness in my home i don't care how much it will cost if she demand i must do it for her  except i don't hv. I help in cooking not only that in every thing at home hoping that will bring joy still zero, i hv decided to come down to Nija so i can seek for divorce i m and tired i am too young to die i just newly complete 30 yrs so i am too young to die.

Look those of u never married go for long date b4 u try marry bcuz this is what i m suffering now all my relationship was phone relationship with her any time i invite her to the country i am she only  spend moths and go back she silent all her way of life now i am in hell but i pray God change her for me b4 we come down to nija so that this divorce in my mind can stop.

Thanks to u all 4 ur advice

Best to start a new thread for that. I opened one for you. Here is the link to it.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-865972.0.html

deniyor:

Best to start a new thread for that. I opened one for you. Here is the link to it.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-865972.0.html

Thanks deniyor. I thought the same too