If u really have true small spots 4 the lady don't mind all the posting wait 4 her,till after service

The guy no get problem at all. Smh! This shouldn't be an issue unless you guys are unsure about the future. You should see where she's coming from. Or you're insecure and scared she will find a better catch??

who cares!,,

Her service is not an excuse. According to NYSC rules you can redeploy after you're married. By presenting your marriage certificate.
NYSc is against keeping your spouse away from you. So If they truely want to marry let them carry on abeg.

apocalypse:

@ freecocoa
Nice picture and pose

Thanks.

I think you should be patient and let her finish her NYSC,if you love her that much to marry her then she is worth the wait.
But what I understand is "I DON'T SEPARATION AFTER MARRIAGE",that can mean different thing depending on perception of the sentence because women can be funny sometimes.
To me that might implies that she don't want a get married,leave her home and head back Imo State.
That can also mean she still 100% sure marriage between you two will survive the test of time,women need that assurance before committing into marriage and that might also be her point.

dis is funny, how possibly can NYSC be an excuse, i really dont know much abt de details of their relationship, how much committed is the guy to the lady's life so far but i think de lady aint totally comfortable with de marriage for now.
de guy is kinda insecure, he thinks de lady may walk away before de lady is through with the NYSC and thats y de guy wants it now.

@op,
tell yur guy to interact with the lady and find out what she really wants and y.
he should just wait till de end of de service year and pray anoda excuse doesnt come up.

God help you both. But OP you no do well, why disquising? I will counsel you if you confess to me you are the guy in question. Common be man enough, you aint gonna be crucified!

Let them know that marriage is blessing. Let them go ahead, it is well and none of them should give any complaint[color=#990000][/color]

its not by force, if you want it now now find someone else. She may have one or two more options to explore b4 settling 4 you. Cant she redeploy?? like many posters said, if you trust her, wait. I wonder who on this earth can still trust women on these kind of issues.

This Nairaland is full of oloriburukus oh! The poor girl wants to wait until she finishes serving in a few MONTHS and they are already accusing her of infidelity! What does Ajegunle have to do with Paris? How did A turn into Z? WTF are these people smoking?

@ the OP, tell your friend to go take a cold shower and calm the fck down! What's the rush? What is a few months of waiting in the grand scheme of things? Are they going to be married for years and years?! Given all you've said, your friend's girlfriend is prudent. The first year of marriage shouldn't be spent apart in different states. What your friend needs to be focusing on is saving money for the wedding and the babies!

Why is he in a rush to enslave her?? Please give the lady some time, she might not be that much into him anyways.

No reason to hurry except insecurity or pregnancy. Where neither's a factor, dude shouldn't be buzzing abt marriage now after waiting so long alrdy. Whatever's yours will alwz come back to you.

I hate it when in a relationship or marriage a party give a comand or an ultimatum.Is she or will she be the first to get married during NYSC?Every thing in life can be worked out.For the guy,I'll advise you to be very careful,any girl u've dated for a while then propose to shld be happy and jump on it but ur girl's not excited so u need to watch it!I knw people who've gotten married while in school and even gotten pregnant.So,watch ur girl.

^^u just said my mind!!!! D girl shld b excited!!!! When they get married, she can redeploy immediately!!! §o there is more to it. Am presently serving too so know abt d rules too. She w̶̲̥̅ι̥ℓℓ b redeployed sharperly! So it seems something is wrong somewhere

The sincere truth is that u both need to sit down and work things out. A monthh can spoil things, not to talk of a year. If u are sure u are ready u better formalize ur relationship before it is too late. I know there is love and trust , but remember that temptation can come on both side. Am speaking from experience

U better put a ring on that finger b4 it is too late

@Poster
The girl is not ready please look for another. To be candid guys that are ready to marry are so
few this days that a few supper once who want to get married should be respected, it is so easy
to get everything in a marriage without actually marrying so what the hell is she talking about.

For you to plan marrying shows that you are capable as a man if she is proving so difficult
enter any of the new generation bank, Telecom coy or Oil coy and hand pick any girl and she is ready to marry you .
Agreeing to marry a job seeker in a country with history of not creating job is something.

Lets face reality , I am afraid she might be buying time truly , Redeployment is always possible anytime during service for women only, who get married before or during the service year, provided she applies and provide documents to support her application. I think she should know this as they might be told at the camp and it is also in the NYSC book given at the camp. So, as a woman, service shouldn't stop her

nairalanders lets b real, i guess dere's no harm in waitin 4 her cuz honestly if his fear is dat she will cheat, dat fear will only becom a nightmare wen he marries her n she is  away frm him. we knw som married corpers hide dia rings so i fink he shuld just trust his chic n possess her after her service. evn if she leaves him den it just mins it wsnt meant 2 b.

yiladogo:

Her service is not an excuse. According to NYSC rules you can redeploy after you're married. By presenting your marriage certificate.
NYSc is against keeping your spouse away from you. So If they truely want to marry let them carry on abeg.

GBAM!

you stole those words from my mouth! NYSC only honours request for redeployment on cogent grounds such as health and marriage.

stiyke:

its not by force, if you want it now now find someone else. She may have one or two more options to explore b4 settling 4 you. Cant she redeploy?? like many posters said, if you trust her, wait. I wonder who on this earth can still trust women on these kind of issues.

na wa o! i tire! even the one under your roof can sometimes [if care isn't taken] can be hard to trust let alone the one thousands of kilometers away.

Ad+:

I hate it when in a relationship or marriage a party give a comand or an ultimatum.Is she or will she be the first to get married during NYSC?Every thing in life can be worked out.For the guy,I'll advise you to be very careful,any girl u've dated for a while then propose to shld be happy and jump on it but ur girl's not excited so u need to watch it!I knw people who've gotten married while in school and even gotten pregnant.So,watch ur girl.

you must be a prophet! I can't agree more. it's guys who usually develop cold feet with such issues due to the commitments it demands but when a lady starts developing cold cold feet, it calls for concern. something must be wrong.

@OP: if this girl truly luvs you, she'll jump at this gesture from you. I know of countless ladies who got married during service year. some even did during undergraduate degree programs. NYSC is no excuse. distance is no excuse. whatever happened to redeployment?

Eltonluigi:

Why is he in a rush to enslave her?? Please give the lady some time, she might not be that much into him anyways.

enslave , I'm not surprised she's bolting away! she's by no means into him at all.

there are many serious ladies out there who will do a somersault from NYSC camp to wherever it is the guy lives just to tie the nuptial knots.

OP abeg read between the lines of her excuse. there's more to it than you are seeing.

freecocoa:

Thanks.

plz stop eyeing free cocoa else nairaland wont contain all of us, we havin a date on 15th, ddd she tell u

@OP, This is a golden opportunity for you to know what is really going on with your fiancee. She can redeploy immediately after marriage, simple. Even without redeployment, she can still go for settlement. This has nothing to do with being insecure but has to do with a lady who apparently not committed, keeping all options open and exploring other options. Just don't be caught unaware, I don't want a lover be hospitalised because of heart break. This lady has option of going to her PPA right from your house after marriage and redeployment if she chooses to. Bull.shit.

There is nothing bad in it, the guy can patiently wait if he trust the lady, but it is too bad to get marry and be seperated in the name of just NYSC.

Your wife is a good companion. The earlier you get into wedding the cheaper it is. The more you prolong the more expensive it becomes. Take then cue start early, start now! If you are not ready yet let her know your reasons. Have you ever visited her home/parents? God bless you as you embark on this faithful journey.

Wait till October for what? In these times when husbands are scarce, she sees a willing suitor and she is making dirty shakara. I know many girls that have said 'let me finish school first; let me get a job first;' etc, and they ended up being veteran spinsters.
What is wrong if they start the process of at least going to see her people? She no serious and is waiting for a better offer somewhere.
My wife was in year 2 wen I married her. Initially she said I shd wait for he to finish skl. I bluntly refused; after all, wat will happen now that can't happen wen she is tru with skl?I shd wait 2yrs again,not counting strike period? As it turned out, they hv lost a year to strike. I for dey wait, abi?
Guy, if u really want it now, tell her so. There is no valid reason she will give in this era of hubby-scarcity that shd satisfy u.

Ok sorry am being blunt here. I dnt think i like dis guy himself, he says he trusts d girl and she could never cheat yet he came on nairaland and threw her to the wolves. This is a simple discussion between 2 adults and u dnt need conflicting opinions to come to a compromise. How many men here will come and start spewing things as simple as dis unless there's been a case of infidelity or suspicion but nt sumtin as silly as dis. So if she refuses to wash ur underwears u'll cum to nairaland to seek opinion on dat. Real men makes decision demselves so pls for ur relationship sake be a real man.

najib14:

Just carry ur ghana must go and go to imo

Imagineers:

Your wife is a good companion.  The earlier you get into wedding the cheaper it is. The more you prolong the more expensive it becomes. Take then cue start early, start now!  If you are not ready yet let her know your reasons. Have you ever visited her home/parents? God bless you as you embark on this faithful journey.

Are you serious dear? You mean the sooner the cheaper? 


@Freecocoa
Cocoanwa, you are so cute!  _{referring to your picture}

Wats wrong wt it? Wats so special about waitin for ur gee to finish up her education? Why r yu in a haste? Pls dont interupt her, u dont even need an advic on dis buddy

No straight answer to your post.

Know a lot of folks that end up with wifey during their NYSC, and some of these babes had relationships before coming for service!
If you can,t take this, u better find a better alternative, However if your are damn sure this is the bone of your bone, well you can wait,

If you have trust issues with her, then don't bother marring her.

Because even some married women flirt  during NYSC.

If you marry her, she will still go back and finish her NYSC, well you can predict what happens there.

moremi2008:

This Nairaland is full of oloriburukus oh! The poor girl wants to wait until she finishes serving in a few MONTHS and they are already accusing her of infidelity! What does Ajegunle have to do with Paris? How did A turn into Z? WTF are these people smoking?

@ the OP, tell your friend to go take a cold shower and calm the fck down! What's the rush? What is a few months of waiting in the grand scheme of things? Are they going to be married for years and years?! Given all you've said, your friend's girlfriend is prudent. The first year of marriage shouldn't be spent apart in different states. What your friend needs to be focusing on is saving money for the wedding and the babies!

My brother help me ask wetin they smoke,

@OP, please take the advice here. The first year of marriage is delicate enough to be spent apart like that, especially the first months.
Let him save some more money, and stop fretting over nothing.