My Life is in RUINS!!! - By freethots00
Dear Friends,

I will kindly appreciate if you can give me your sincere opinion on my predicament, am a 26yrs old married lady, b4 i met my husband, i had several relationships.
On meeting my husband, we wia on wat u wud call "contract realtionship" dis we agreed wud give us our privacy n all. bt tins didnt work out dt way. we deviated from the so called contract n found ourselves always hanging out togeda n i moved in to live wit him.
During this time, my job required me to leave the state we lived in to anoda state, this poised a huge problem 4 our relationship which was blossoming, during dis time, my previous lovers got tired of trying to win me back.
so , i moved to this new state n we made promises of visiting regulary n calling each other.then one day i made a terrible mistake,

myself n my boyfriend (who is nw my husband) had a misunderstanding, i kept calling him to apologise bt he refused picking my calls, so i took out my laptop so i cud entice him wit a sensual video chat bt he still didnt respond to my invitation, i felt dissappointed and lonely. Out of no wia, two of my past lovers came online n wanted to chat wit me, i cudnt resist the temptation of accepting n we had video chats with me being nude n stuffs,
i neva knew my boyfriend (husband) had my laptops,email accs and BB bugged, from which he knew of wat happened dt nite. he confronted me wit it n i owned up pleading 4 his forgiveness n promised to neva do it again.
bt deep down i knew he wud neva 4get it and i ws hurting with shame disgust at wat i had done.
this lead to series of quarrels , calling me revolting names dt am ashamed to even mention here, all dis i accepted n on several occassions he promised me he wud neva 4give or trust me in his entire life.
this went on for months unend until late last year, wen he told me he has learnt to forgive me n he trusted me again. My heart knew no bounds to the joy dt filled my heart, den he proposed, i felt like i ws d luckliest woman dt eva walked the surface of the earth.
we got married and i had to leave so as to seek a transfer from my office. bt tins are nw getting worse than b4,
one of the guyz i did the nude video chat wit (works wit my company) has bn asked to come work in my current branch. immediately i heard dis, i told my husband and since dt day , he has bn treating me worse dan a rag,
nw we r back to square one, the names, accusations, he nw accuses me of infidelity,
please i dnt knw hw to go abt dis, am in total confusion, i hv known no other man since we got serious with each other, he is promising me of breaking up with me (this is a marriage of 2months ), did i do wrong in telling him everytin i knw n always telling him d truth, i knw i did wrong i accept, bt cn we eva b a normal marriage n couple?
please i beg cos i love him n wouldnt want to loose him, THis is a story of a married lady , please, no insults, only constructive advice is needed. thanks

This is one heck of a confusing story. I won't even bother trying to make sense of it. I'm out!

Tell the woman involve to
get her pastor involved. The woman should explain this
to her/their pastor and he(the pastor) should confront her husband

Hope this helps

This is one heck of a confusing story. I won't even bother trying to make sense of it. I'm out!

you cudnt make sense out of it because you have seen you cant insult the lady, , NL knows how to throw insults than advice

Disagree wt getting external help. Might make things worse.

Maybe a good friend who is liberal, on a later note if things do not improve.
Simply have to give ur chap sometime to cool off,

You happily waited the last time he sulked, so he's used to that mode of action.
No use, trying a different approach yet.

Give him time to cool off n make sure no reasons come up for him to suspect foulplay.
Whether innocent mistakes or not.

Srry I became judgemental when she went nude for other dudes while in a relationship.

^^

Even telling guys bout ur previous relationships can make a man upset since he didn't ask u abt it not to talk of in marriage.

Why unclad for another men when you are in a relationship?

@poster
I really don't pity you cos you took the took the decision to act like a LovePeddler yourself so deal with it.

Adetayo100:
Why unclad for another men
when you are in a relationship?


She was in dilemma maybe her husband now was going to jilt her back then thats why she tried to use her unclothedness to entice her ex bfs maybe one will come back into her life again, what an insecure fellow.

Going naked was a mistake that happened since and she acknowledged her error.

I feel this man should grow up. He shouldn't have taken her to the altar if she didn't trust her.

Let her talk to their pastor maybe that will help.

Well my advice is that try as much as possible and remove your mind from giving such access to those your friends and make up your mind never to do such thing with them, and always make your husband understand that there is noway you can do such a thing again, turndown what ever offer those your friends may offer, either gift, most importantly ( lunch, ride and emotions) if you are able to do away with this in 100 percent then you can save your self, please pay more attention to your husband.

Firstly, dnt lose your cool. If your husband will not listen to you send a mail to him, tell him everything you just told us. I would have said you should involve an elderly person or someone else who will help you plead but the person may end up judging you harshly.

Now quit carrying yourself around him like you deserve whatever he dishes out to you because of your past mistake. You errd, you asked to be forgiven he agreed FULL STOP. when you keep walking around him as if he has done you a favour and you are too lucky to have him he will keep revisiting the issue anytime you have a small misunderstanding or when you bump into any of your exes before you know it you pay for an old crime over and over again. Stop that i am a sinner behaviour it will go a long way. both of you are lucky to have eachother.

Have a deep talk with him, tell him you want to know how long he will keep maltreating you because of those videos? you understand its a difficult thing but you don't plan to be punished for the rest of your life. I know this will be a hard thing for you to do (if not impossible) but its necessary.