In our african tradition its normal for relatives to move in with a couple: to assist with the house chores or to baby sit the kids or in most cases just to have a place to stay.

However, when there are too many people in the house it sometimes interferes with the couples relationship, communication and se.x llife may be affected as well (especially if the relatives are the wifes people lol)

So is It really helpful to a marriage for relatives to move in with a couple?? Should a new couple avoid it if they can??

[size=44pt]Yes!![/size]

JayCee2010:

In our african tradition its normal for relatives to move in with a couple: to assist with the house chores or to baby sit the kids or in most cases just to have a place to stay.

However, when there are too many people in the house it sometimes interferes with the couples relationship, communication and se.x llife may be affected as well (especially if the relatives are the wifes people lol)
So is It really helpful to a marriage for relatives to move in with a couple?? Should a new couple avoid it if they can??

The relatives doesn't have to move in to help out. They can live in their own homes and come over whenever needed.

If they do not have a place to live then they can live with single relatives. Married couples need their privacy and opportunity to bond without outside factors.

~Killz~:

^^^
Stop shouting. . . We know!

~Killz~:

^^^
Stop shouting. . . We know!

At first, I was on board with single relatives staying with us in spare bedroom to help them get on their feet, but of course Chima wasn't down for that because he emphasized a marital home isn't for single people.

Do you agree?

Newly married couples are to be given a space to breath fresh air. But, after some years, i have no problems with whoever wants to come and stay with us.

^you sure about that?

Mrs, Chima:

[size=44pt]Yes!![/size]

the one and only answer

Relatives moving in sometimes helps but it could be troublesome as well.

Even as a single man staying alone is nonnegociable, talkless of when i am married.
In order to avoid my mum and siblings interfering with my home when am married, i am rather making things comfortable for them now.
They can come briefly and go but staying with us permenently?
Nba-nu.

When I marry, I will never allow my relatives or my wife's relatives to stay in my house. It just doesnt work out. Where were the relatives staying before we married? Or would they be sleeping on the streets had I or my wife not married? I dont see any need for extra help with house chores. A couple should be able to take care of their home and husbands should help their wives with some chores.

[color=#770077][/color] for a young couple I will say no relative. If they need help let them get someone that comes in on weekend to do general cleaning & laundry (relative or paid help). If they have a baby a relative may come for a short while to assist. Young couple need to study each other, fight & make up, bond and set the ground rules in their own house before relatives undue interference.

However it all depend on how accommodating they are and the family background. Don't go and marry Mother Theresa and expect that he/she won't be running the home like a hostel/hotel.

Its also better to discuss and agree on all this during courtship though so there are less surprises.

Depends on how big your house is,

If the house is not big dont have live in relative. IF you dont have charllete / bq at the back of the house. F.cking you wife and she can't scream as she would like to at night. And you can't Bleep hard and fast , because of the slap sound that comes when you it fast. You feel like there is a spy / intruder, can't kiss randomly. Well almost same with grown kids in the house or growing kids. Or kids that like attention.

tEsLim:

If the house is not big dont have live in relative. IF you dont have charllete / bq at the back of the house. F.cking you wife and she can't scream as she would like to at night. And you can't bleep hard and fast , because of the slap sound that comes when you it fast. You feel like there is a spy / intruder, can't kiss randomly. Well almost same with grown kids in the house or growing kids. Or kids that like attention.

lol

Mrs, Chima:

[size=44pt]Yes!![/size]

Seconded

Third-ed

Fourth-ed

Fifth-ed

Thousand-ed

Million-ed

Billion-ed

Trillion-ed

Zillion-ed

Arrant nonsense. People should stay on their own. If their people are not married they sleep outside eh"

One of my boss was in the office when his father inlaw called him that his on his way to his house. he was like 'what? beside, it's not up to 3 days another brother inlaw came and collected money for school fees. this time he told the man on phone that  work took him out of town and it may take him one month before he'l come back. he called his wife to give her father t.p when he arrive that he is out of town due to work. So u can imagine how unrest he'l be feeling inside becos of relatives. married people need space, not clinging. too much of interference can lead to problems in the house.

If you are visiting or coming to help out or whatever, it should always be on invitation. If it is a temporal accommodation you are looking for, you should have a plan or timetable which you present to them and let them accept or agree before you come over. Don't ever force yourself on them.

it is a two way issue my guys.

Yes they do. Especially for newly wedded who would love to have sex everytime they brush past each other. Disadvantages far outweighs the advantages

Yes they do and irreparably so.

Thanks for d responses everyone. I also agree dat live-in relatives have a way of interfering in a marriage, but its not easy to turn ones back on family members in need. Especially those who need a place to stay. Besides, some relatives can be geninely helpful and respect privacy.

The worst part is when they show up unannounced and uninvited to spend a couple of days and on leaving they expect you to drop transport fare and "something small" (like I have a money minting machine under my bed) lool

If they are ur wifes people, she may prefer to hang out with them, speaking their language (that you don't understand) making you feel like an outcast in ur own home.

Don't get me started on when they get TOO comfortable in ur house and prevent you from watching the TV channel of your choice (in my own house)! Lmao

Its a lose-lose situation: u take them in and risk ruining ur peaceful home; keep them out and risk being the wicked brother, uncle or in-law (or sister, aunty as the case may be)!

Yes! They cause friction and disagreements between couoples.
They invade on their privacy hence they can't practice some random stuff couples do in relationships
Ǡŋ₫ with the really useless relatives, ωħ☺ only want to eat ǡŋ₫ sleep without contributing nada, they drain the family financially

Its most annoying, especially when they begin to speak their language they know you don't understand and feels there is nothing wrong with it.

I agree with Mrs Chima. That's why I banned my relatives and in-laws from living with us. My wife and I need our privacy.

Where the live in relative(s) is genuinely friendly with the wife and respects her as the queen of the home, his or her presence may help reduce quarells and tension. There may be no spark in the marriage even if it's only husband and wife living in the house.

TWO is Company, more than that is CROWD!

Even children ruin the love life a bit.

But you gotta have a big house to ensure a little privacy with your spouse so that the sparks can really fly!

Me and wifey enjoy walking around nakedly in the house  but found it impossible with our "good"  children around!

Lastpage!