[size=13pt]The below are answers to exam questions by UK school children, makes you wonder what has happened to a  'once was ' best education system in the world.[/size]



What's hard water? It's ice,  Convert centimetre to metre? Take out centi,  Teachers spill the beans on funniest exam answers EVER

Q. What is meant by the term 'hermaphrodite'? A. Lady Gaga
Q. What do we call the science of classifying living things? A. Racism

For years, the 'Kung Fu' gland somehow escaped the attention of endocrinologists.

But one student has clearly found it,  according to his hilarious answer to a biology exam question (complete with surreal sketch).

And what about the meaning of the term 'hermaphrodite'. That would, apparently, be 'Lady Gaga'.

Welcome to the wonderful world of Funnyexam.com - a website crammed with astonishingly bad answers given by students in both the UK and US.


Discovery of the legendary 'Kung Fu' gland, according to one student on Funnyexam.com



See the top right corner, so that you're quite clear they're talking about a 'horse',



Now that's a 'hard' exam question

Teachers have so far submitted hundreds of 'epic fail' responses by pupils, covering maths, science and just about every other subject on the curriculum.

And it does make you wonder what exactly is being taught in schools.


One pupil had the perfect answer to: 'Briefly explain what hard water is'.
They wrote 'Ice'.


















Equally amusing are the comments made by exasperated teachers.

Take this 'feelings' study below - where 'Enough is enough Judy!' has been written on the naughty pupil's answer sheet. Well, they did call the poor boy ugly.

It is not clear whether all the exam answers are genuine.

Indeed, all references to the schools in question have been censored, so it would be impossible to authenticate them.





































http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/02/29/article-2108063-11F77C60000005DC-163_634x188.jpg

and this makes the Nigerian Education system better than the UK System how exactly??

@Moderators, could you please move this to the joke section where it belongs.

It is no laughing matter , trust me.

It is almost old news that the UK State education system is nearing total collapse.

Q: why are there rings on saturn

A: because God liked it, so he put a ring on it.

Teacher's remark: saturn was not a single lady

I chit you not, Frosbel, I laughed so hard reading those exam answers that I had tears streaming down my face here. Damn.

My favourite answer is the one about the invention of "Good Vibrations" (by the Beach Boys) in the 1960s, followed closely by the kid who innocently mentions that his dad wants "hores", and his mom says no.

I'm saving that entire sequence to send about. You's da man. Forsbel. If laughter is indeed good for the soul then you just added a few more years to my life today. Thanks bud.

D'oh! what are my exams paper doing online?

lwkmd

Oh Lawwd! I've never laughed so hard in ages.
The particular one that got to me was expand (a+b)^ and find X.
I couldn't stop laughing!

I am just wondering why the real picture of that little girl was used; the ineffective covering of her eyes could not prevent her from being identified.   

And the fact that she was the only one so exposed adds to my bewilderment and curiosity.

@OP, I tried to open the link you provided but it didn't work.

Nigerian kids are not so dumb like these oyinbo pikins. If any of our kids 4ck up, then we show them the rod on their buttocks. But in the U.K, these teachers are scared to do anything or less they face a law suit. wtf! flash them for yansh them go know why them dey school! even our almajiris sabi pass them.

This Iƨ̣̣̣̇̇̇ not enough reason to say such about Τ̲̅ђε̲̣̣̣̥ UK system. These children aя̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ definitely bottom class products. At least they gave answers that seemed rather smart but wrong. Here in Nigeria, I've seen a TC 2 copy Τ̲̅ђε̲̣̣̣̥ name of Τ̲̅ђε̲̣̣̣̥ student she was copying from. Mind Ÿ̲̣̣̣̥ø̲̣̣̥u̶̲̥̅̊! These aя̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ women in their thirties. Secondary school Iƨ̣̣̣̇̇̇ a disaster, physics students do not know what a volt meter ø® ammeter looks like.

Haha. . .LMFAO *Page Bookmarked*

i read dat newspaper too.it cannot even be verified if it was by skool student nd even if it was true,lets face it every1 country is got their retards.In order to say 9ja skools r better than the uk's u actually need proper evidence!

@diluminati corporal punishment has never been a good thing.

Sorry this is meant for joke section. i understand the moderator make a mistake posting this scrap here.

But poster the above dont justify your claim.

LWKMD very funny I tell you, especially the student that was asked to expand,
But seriously, I don't think this justifies our own educational system; the answers look stupid at least, but I think they are reasonable enough if you look from the perspective of their age. I think the most stupid is the 'kunfu gland'. Don't wanna sound sarcastic though, but I think it'll be difficult to see nigerian kids answering with such level of sincerity these children answered with. Very sincere in their reasoning; something that'll make them good students in future.

thats real funny yea, but their UK 5th graders are smarter than our Nigerian jambites,
they showed creativity in most of their responses,

it u wanna see dumb a$$, go and watch the screening episode of Miss Nigeria by Nike Omotosho,

I loved the maths question:

Expand (a+b)ⁿ

The guy did expand it.

The teacher wrote: "Very funny Peter"

Very funny students i tell you.Also if you want to laugh well, check out secondary schools in the north for those of you that served as a teacher in this schools during nysc.If you see funny english and responses ehn.

lolzzzzz hav seen most of em though, not enuf justification though,

diluminati:

Nigerian kids are not so dumb like these oyinbo pikins. If any of our kids 4ck up, then we show them the rod on their buttocks. But in the U.K, these teachers are scared to do anything or less they face a law suit. wtf! flash them for yansh them go know why them dey school! even our almajiris sabi pass them.

trashing students has done more harm dan gud, dere r many 9ja skools now dat dnt use d rod

A bit of a leap in comparisons based on the some jokes

Emperoh:

I won't conclude that the UK system is failing because of this.
These could be comedians in the making for all i care or even Creatives in an AD agency.

As far as i am concerned, these questions are smart even though they are wrong.

But yea. . . . .i am having the laugh of a life time

Absolutely fcking on point.

You cannot just rank Nigerian education higher based on answers of UK students alone. We need to see those of their Nigerian counterparts. Besides, most of the answers where logical. For example the student who was told to expand an expression made a genuine and logical effort to do so. He/she even dedicated four lines to the problem.

There answers showed logic, they may not have crammed or memorised the answers but they showed some creativity. This character may even see them excelling in life.

Q: Why does Saturn have a ring on it.

A: Because God liked it, so he put a ring on it.



When I tell una say na Beyonce, Rihanna and Lady Gaga dey raise una kids, una go think say I dey joke.

Gosh! this really got me rolling on the floor.

At the age of 10, Uk students have done what secondary students in Nigeria have never heard of. This is really funny though, you will be surprised the age of these students compared to Nigerian student when they learn the same thing. you need to compare classroom standard, teaching standard, Govt support and other independent bodies.

They dont do jack of all trade. a ten yr old in the uk knows what he wants. An adult graduate still does not know what to major in. Let me believe this is a joke.

lol

where are d jokes?

Abeg shut up about UK standards. It is the private schools that are good. Most of their primary and secondary schools are rubbish. My classmate joined us in JS 1 and did not know anything not even 12 times table. She was always struggling in school but after several extra classes and so on she was able to catch up as she is quite intelligent. Her sister was not so lucky and had to repeat a class.

Go to UK and tell me if they can even spell. They are so behind when you compare at primary and secondary school. It is when you get to university that they shine more. Why don't they go to university so much? It is cause they are not able to cope. Nigerians go to their universities and outshine them.

Those who have foreign masters should tell the house how many of their English classmates came out with distinction. That is why they keep looking for foreign students.