A City People Magazine Interview,
Long before Jaiye Aboderin, her late husband, the talented singer passed on suddenly in 2004, movie star actress, Stella Damasus-Aboderin had been a hot news item for the print media, especially the tabloids. She became the subject of gossips, some of which were very damaging. But through all of this, Stella maintained a silence almost as thick as a wall. Then came the death, Jaiye, in December 2004, following a heart attack during a basketball match. Events that unfolded after his demise were to spark off yet another round of controversies, all revolving around Stella, the young widow and mother of two girls. Prominent among these controversies was her sudden return to singing and attending events, her age long cold war with some members of her late husband’s family that reared its head all over again, and most recently, the rumoured talks about her relationship with gospel singer, Sammy Okposo, among several allegations levelled against her. Still Stella kept mute, fervently refusing to be forced into any form of reaction, even when friends pressured her to do so. That was the position she held until Friday, 27th of February 2006, when City People’s deputy Editor-In-Chief, Susan-Eyo-Honesty, met with Stella a second time, after a chance meeting a few days before that fateful meeting. This reporter once again, felt a strong desire to enter into the mind of this beautiful celebrity actress, who in her 20’s, has been in the eye of the storm ever since she came into the limelight, as well as being thrown into widowhood unexpectedly. Surprisingly, the City People team while discussing who would be the best face and personality for the City People Quarterly edition for this Valentine’s, Stella’s name was unanimously agreed would be the ideal personality to celebrate, but there was a problem. With all of the bad press that has been generated over time, the question was: would she be willing to break that silence, worse still to the press who’ve been on her case for as long as her career has fared. A combination of favour and mother luck was at work, when what was meant to be a normal chat with Stella, saw her agreeing to a request for a formal interview that same day. And from Cactus, a restaurant on ozumba Mbadiwe, V.I Lagos, it was off to Stella’s Lekki abode that we went, where for 3 hours, like never before, Stella opened up on her life, one year after Jaiye’s death. In this no holds barred interview, Stella spoke to SUSAN EYO-HONESTY about her many problems after Jaiye died, the many controversies that trailed her and how she’s survived it all. It’s very hot and revealing!

How did Jaiye’s death come to you?[/color]



I went for a meeting that Friday morning, because the previous night, he had some of his friends over, and he had said that we were going to take them out. So the plan was that, I was going to go for my meeting and then he was supposed to go and play squash with his friend, and then take our friends out. I went for the meeting, and on my way, my car started giving problems, so I called him at about 2.15pm and I told him that my car had started giving me problems. He said when I come back, that the mechanic will come and take it that was the last time I spoke with him. So sometimes around 6pm that day, I got a call from somebody who never calls me, one of his friends, and he said to me that my attention was needed on the Island, that Jaiye needs to see me immediately. And he now asked me that, “does Jaiye have any problem with his health that they didn’t know about?” so I asked him that “what are you talking about?” and he told me that Jaiye had fainted and he needed me to come immediately. At that point, I just felt that something funny was wrong; I was with my sister-in-law, Bena. So we now drove to the Island and as we were getting there, I got another call saying that I should come to the hospital they had taken him to, somewhere near Mega Plaza. So I rushed there, and as I got there, I saw a lot of people there and I was wondering, what they were all doing there dressed in their sports wear. Then I’m wondering, “If this man only fainted, what were they all doing here?” I thought maybe he needed blood and they wanted me to come and identify something. Then I got there and saw people just running away from me. The only person that could come to me was my friend, [b]Kate Henshaw-Nuttal. She just grabbed my hand and said to me that I had to come and see the doctor. Then as we were going, she was whispering to Bena, my in-law, and that one just ran away and started screaming. So I asked, “what’s going on?” so Kate took me upstairs to the Doctor’s office. The doctor now asked me if I was Jaiye’s wife, and I said yes. And I looked around at all his friends that he was playing basketball with, and they were all crying around me. So I asked, “What is going on? Why are you all crying?” Then the doctor said to me that he was sorry, that they did all that they could, but that my husband was dead. I reacted by first laughing out loud. I said to him that he must be kidding; this was the kind of thing I get to hear in movies. I screamed that he couldn’t tell me that. I almost ripped his throat off when I jumped on him. Again he said that he was sorry. I looked at those around me and I was asking Kate “what are you people telling me? My husband is dead at my age, what are you telling me?”[/b] Then I saw my brother, my mother came and I just started seeing family members and I’m like “Jesus, what’s really going on?” At that point, I didn’t really know what was happening, except that my brother in-law, my sister’s husband, came and held my hand and said that I had to see my husband’s body, that if I don’t see it, I’ll never believe to accept it. So they took me downstairs to one room, and there he was lying down as if he was sleeping. I tried to wake him up, I ran out of that place and felt it just had to be a dream. Then I thought, “Let me go back there, that I’m very sure it couldn’t have been him. But lo and behold, I went back in there and it was him.


How did you relay what happened to the kids?[color=#000099][/color][color=#990000][color=#990000][/color]



Well, the kids were very young then, Isabel was 5 and Angelica was 2 years old. Angelica was not a problem because she was just a baby; she didn’t understand what it meant. But with Isabel who was very close to her dad…I just looked at her one day…the day after Jaiye died, she came to my room and she told my sister that she saw her dad near her window, and my sister asked her, “what did he say to you?” and she said “he told me that I should take care of mummy that everything is fine ”. So I called her and now said to her that “daddy is in heaven, Jesus had taken him to heaven and you’ll see him one day, but he’s not coming back home” I kept reassuring her that everything will be fine and that I’d do my best to take care of her, but that her dad is always with her. That anytime someone offends her, that she should always remember that Daddy is somewhere around. I always teach them this concept of God, having faith without evidence, without seeing, that she should see her father in that light as well. But once in a while, she’ll still come to me and ask me “are you taking me to see daddy” and I will tell her that I can’t take her to see daddy that only God can. So sometimes they talk about him, but whenever they hear his voice when I play his music, they always know that its his voice, and they always see pictures of him around the house. That’s one thing I know that I will always do for my children-make sure that hey remember what he looks and sounds like. I guess because of their age, it was easier for me to make them relax. Maybe when they get older, I would have to start explaining the concept of death to them.

http://www.nigeriansinamerica.com/articles/952/1/3-Hours-With-Stella-Damasus-Aboderin

I am sooo sorry for this pretty lady!

A damsel to behold

Rather unfortunate

Life must go on for her

Big ups to Stella!