₦airaland Forum

[quote author=baby_123]Forbidden fruit is the sweetest. You think the uncle will just let go like that even after she is married? Afterall this was their relationship. She dey chop ounje agba na. Her aunty meat, she dey enjoy as much as her aunty. Tufiakwa! If she ever wants to marry in life, she better keep this part to herself.lool. The uncle knows she can never tell her aunty, she will be the loser. Shebi she was doing it with a married man, and her uncle, so continuing the relationship will not be the lowest in her life she has brought herself to.[/quote]Lol your post made me laugh out loud

coogar: i can't believe people are giving excuses for this chic....vulnerable at 18? 19? 21? the age most people cop their first degrees? jeeeez - the girl's IQ must be lower than her shoe size....

Mashed up mentality. I can't believe it's not butter it myself.

ileobatojo: If you can't see that she was r.aped on that night, I doubt there is any value continuing to respond to you. She did not consent to that act that night. Therefore she was r.aped.

Fyi: Consent is an agreement made without pressure, manipulation or intimidation.

Were you there? Or are you the uncle?

slimyem: Why did she stay back?

The dïck sweet pass sugar.

He was obviously hitting all the right spots

ileobatojo: Well, the fact that she felt it was okay to carry on a clearly abominable, unhealthy s.exual relationship with a family member for years tells me she was at a vulnerable stage in her s.exual development.



Bottom line is she was doing it because of a hold he had on her not because she desired to f*ck him. That = abuse.




I completely agree and have said this multiple times.

Nope she still ain't vulnerable, because she's not an under-age kid who isn't old enough to consent to sèxual activities. Or who isn't old enough to know what sèx is, and how wrong incèst is.

Vulnerable ko, vulcaniser ni.



She's not right in the head, but she ain't vulnerable.

Some people need to get it into their head that we (esp Myself) are not trying to justify ràpe, sèxual abuse, molèstation etc.

But some things just doesn't add up in this story.

From all the stories you've heard, you all expect the men to be the only guilty one.

I know about sèxual abuse to firmly say that her story just does not add up. It doesn't fit the norm. Most abused kids run away from home when they start getting to around 14 yrs old. Even if they have no where to go, they would rather be homeless than stay another night to be violated again.

The only stories I've heard of anyone older than 16yrs to be sexually abused is through ràpe (in and outside of a relationship), not from inçest. At that age, a person is wise enough to know what is right and wrong, and to also know what threat or manipulation is. At that age, you only fall "victim" to incèst if you're a willing participant or there's some gain in there for you.




Excuse any typos... Typing on my phone
-___-

ileobatojo: Of course I believe it. This type of scenario was my suspicion all along!



Keep defending r.ape okay? I'm sure it's all very hilarious to you.



It's not irrelevant. It is the basis of the entire matter. It was from there the psychological hold he has over her developed. Excuse me if I refuse to blame her emotional scars and twisted psyche as a result of an abusive episode when she was at a vulnerable developmental period on her!

17 years old is NOT a vulnerable stage of development.

Psychological hold? Probably yea. Financial hold? Yes, maybe.


All I know is, she's a messed up adult who needs help.

How did she know that her uncle made sure everyone has gone to bed.

Was she eavesdropping from the room she was in anticipation of what was about to happen?!?!


I smell a rat

ileobatojo: Were you living in his house because your parents desperately sent you to live in someone else's house for years on end? Was your dad's friend your primary benefactor, your provider of shelter and sustenance? Did he come into your room in the dead of the night when there was no one else around? How hard is it to see that some people would feel trapped and stuck in such a situation? How many options do you think she felt she had in that situation?

The op's gf might have felt trapped the night of the incidence, but c'mon, 4 years after, the same bullshît is still happening. I need to find out more info from the op but a 17 years old is defo wise enough to know her left from right.

If it was a one off thing, then yeah she was ràped. But 4years at the age she was, there's no smoke without fire.

The man should know better, but if you don't wanna be violated, don't put yourself in a position that will get you abused. She isn't a 4 years old girl that has been told that something bad will happen to her family if she tells anyone about the immoral act.

She knows better. I think so anyway.

ileobatojo: I am actually just noticing this post by the OP when I went looking back in this thread. I completely missed it before.

I'm interested to hear what abil has to say about this now.

I see opportunity.. Wife wasn't around.

She seems to remember a lot things in details.. Most abused individuals try to repress the traumatic experience.

She mentioned him sending her abroad.. She probably thought that sleeping with him will get her what her heart desires. So she might have tried to stop him, but the promises (his willingness to do anything for her) overweighs the immoral act.


What is also weird is the word "resist". The uncle must have been tempting enough for her to want to resist him.


If she was forced to sleep with him, she won't be repeatedly doing it when she's grown enough to catch a bus back to her village.



Even if the story happened as she claimed it did, if she didn't want him violating her -even if he was able to over power her on that night- she would have done something the next time to prevent it.



We need to ask the girl how bad she wanted to travel abroad.

timifakay: *on a lighter note* Why can't we just put the fault on the usual guy and say- "its the work of the devil"

Because the devil isn't guilty sometimes

coogar: she still shagged the uncle after her 21st birthday - she must be mentally retardëd to have allowed this crap!!!

That's why I refuse to say that she was sexually abused. I know of sexûal abuse cases, and the girl's one doesn't fit in with the norm.

She might have been, she might not have. But there's more to this story than meet the eye.

manny4life: Damn, lol, u don't have to be mean now...

As for me, it's the stomach (food) cos without food, no matter how much I read, I'll feel bamboozled. Without enough food, you can't really do much. After food, comes every other thing else.

It was a joke. But do you have to put your contact details on the post?!

[quote author=Sisi_Kill]On the one side, is a 17yrs old Girl.

On the other side is the very much older MARRIED UNCLE (with Children!!!)

. . . .and it is the 17yrs old who doesn't respect boundaries?!!

Lmao! I have heard it all!![/quote]She ain't 17 no more, she's an adult now. Both of them may be blamed, or the uncle may have been the one to initiate and manipulate her, or the girl might be a willing participant

For now, we can only make assumptions.. but I refuse to make an actual judgement until the OP comes to clarify some things that I don't get.

ItsModella: rotflmaooooooo!!! abiL and candie, could this be your future husband?

I reject all things bad IJN.

You have him

timifakay: what @sis_kill said made something occur to me, IF she was being treated as a second class citizen by the wife, she could have seen being with the man as a way of getting back at the wife.
#justsaying

Valid point.

[quote author=Sisi_Kill]EXACTLY!!!

Why tell him?!! It's not like it is something he would have ever suspected, so if she was the errr. . .what the word again. . ."covetous" Mata Hari some would like us to believe, then she was practically home free. I mean this is like chasing after a policeman who is just passing by minding his own business, just to tell him you just committed a crime.

Who does that?!!! [/quote]She might have told him because the uncle may have been threatening her, and she does not want to look like a slût. Like if you don't come back to sücking my dïck, I'm gonna tell your bf how much of a slág you are

*I'm just making shît up* but It could be true

coogar: i said op's girlfriend was cornered not concerned....



it?

Oops! Temporary blindness

coogar: thank you very much....
@ 18, 19, 20 and 21?? she only stopped shaggïng this uncle this year when she met this dude.....and we are to believe she was only doing what she was being told? 20/21?? dearie me!

That's why I won't say that she's been abused.

You hear stories of bro and sis sleeping together, so this girl might just be séxually attracted to her uncle... Maybe that's her way of repaying him back. Who knows (but I do want to find out)

The girl needs help, and the uncle too.

candieangel12: Lol haha, next time im in europe, I gotta meet ya. My NL twin
But yep, high heels are to die for. I just cant walk away from a nice pair of heels. It literally calls my name, which then makes me buy it

Yes! Definitely!

I have so much shoes that I've limit myself to just 2 pairs a month.

My mum said she bought me my first pair of kids heels when I was 4 yrs old. She said I was always crying to her to get me one when I see older people wearing them.

coogar: then she's culpable if she wasn't cornered the entire period - isn't that what i have been saying all year?



she, as in.....the op's girlfriend or ileobatojo?

You said that the op's gf was concerned according to ileobatajo

timifakay: According to my dictionary, personality is (1) the quality or way of being of a person
(3) the complex characteristics that distinguish an individual or goup....
How does this not affect the reason the uncle and lady's commiting incest?

You tell me!

I'm telling you that there's no correlation or studies that I know of that have shown personality to be directly linked to the likelihood of incèst occurring.

To add,

Even at 17years old, a person can still behave in ways that is considered abnormal.
She probably saw her uncle as the only option for her to get what she wants. But her case is just weird because most people that are abused at young ages gets away from their abuser from around age 15. However in her case, she's getting into it at a very late age, so I will not put all the blame on the uncle.
The uncle must have propositioned her, but she clearly knew what was going on and what she was getting into. He might have manipulated her to the point where she feels like she has no other option BUT I doubt it, because she won't keep going back to her uncle if she was sèxually abused against her will.


I would like to know about her family background OP! Like I've said, something obviously went wrong somewhere.

timifakay: yea, i think so

There's no correlation between personality and the act of incèst.

coogar: she was cornered according to ileobatojo....

i do that all the time too but this one is inexcusable!

I jumped into this convo without reading all the post. So if I may ask, what was she concerned about? (Can't be arśed to read all the posts )

Like I've said Coogar, I'm not arguing against your point of view.


I just like to look deeper into situations to get an understanding of why.

coogar: it's not the having sëx that is the problem but having it with her uncle

Yes I do know

&& I also would like to understand why she thinks its okay to sleep with her uncle. Something obviously went wrong somewhere.

coogar: arghhhhhh - i even expect a 5-yr old to show some little resistance....

I wasn't arguing against your point, I was just saying.

A girl of 17 should know better, but there are some people who haven't learnt or been taught better. She most definitely knew that the sèxual activity was wrong, but instead of bashing her, we need to try and understand why she chose to ignore that feeling and instead went ahead with committing inćest.

timifakay: What age do you suggest?

There is no age. Development don't stop until death. The rate of it might decline or increase depending on age, individual differences etc.

For me to be able to understand you better, do you mean personality when you say character?

timifakay: Psychologist make the character claim!

Human character is NOT formed by the age of 7. I'm a psychologist, I should know.

coogar: how do you "force" someone to be an accomplice at 17?
christ - you guys should stop this feeble excuse - she was culpable! the op never mentioned the word "rapë"......this was purely consensual!

Some people might be old but have the mental maturity of a 5 years old.