₦airaland Forum

I, Actually, Stand With Paddy!

Two things really got me come unzipped this week. Nicole's auction of her V-card, then Paddy Adenuga's Tweet. Nicole wanted a house for her parents.The Italian Model, 18, wanted a strawberries Arnod education too, so, She would be giving out her Hymen to the highest bidder, and, the last time I checked, She's got an offer of up to £890,000 (huh! who would be popping a cherry for that whopping sum?). I'm not proud of Nicole though, I actually don't know what to say. Especially, when ladies in this part of the world freely loose their Virginity in the woods.Those who attach a price at all, would let it go for a plate of noodles.

Paddy Adenuga, the handsome Son of a Nigerian Billionaire and owner of Glo, from his handle, told the world his kind of girl. "The way babes use filters this days is very scary," he first said, then the last one that got people talking: "I can't date you if you wear wigs or lacefronts..never! I have standards and I refuse to compromise." Some, on social media, actually cheered his views, but many rebooked him, and even black-eyed the gentleman.Then, my question. Why is it so difficult for an African girl to look African?

Paddy, actually, do not dislike ladies in lacefronts(I just hope I'm right!). His choice of words were just a way of saying: "I like her, Natural." Who doesn't? There's no African girl nowhere anylonger. Every black girl sees herself as a mistake. Her colour, she hates. Her hair, she doesn't like. Her eyes, she detests. She doesn't even like her voice. She prefers pencil marks to her eye lashes too! African ladies go a long way to even import the foreign culture of rudeness, arrogance and promiscuity, not to talk of deliberately altering their figures in the name of plastic surgery.They want the American kind of freedom, so, in families, no mothers anymore. Just wives!

Black is beautiful! Everyone one says. But, every Nigerian lady craves for a brazilian personality.They want it too foreign to be sane! I like it just the way it is. Many of these ladies look all artificial to impress the likes of Paddy, and now, that the billionaire's son falls in love with the soul, what choice have them? Paddy is only helping us bring back our girls.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist. faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

AgbenuAnna:
They are celebrities on nairaland

They trend beyond nairaland.

Are Baby Mamas too, Celebrities?

Everyone wants to be famous. Everyone wants to be in the limelight, no matter what! Some Mothers recently took to instagram to share a picture of their giant backsides. Daughters too, exposed their fat bums to camera flashes.They all wanted to make a figure out of their uncommon booties. It was a nice move, wasn't it? At least, we now know, those mothers have got a Dong of an ass, and the daughters, a hiney-heinie hind end.

On boxing day, a lady shared an after-sex picture of herself and her boo, unclad. Thumbs up, now we know, it was a mattress dancing, a nookie on boxing day. She wanted to become a celebrity too. Young females enlarge their breasts, after which they go online to share, carefully taken photographs of their bulky-burly boobies. So many vaginas online, so many vulva, begging for pants. So many cleavages. A number of butts, crying for clothes. Owners are not crazy, all they humbly seek is stardom. They want to be celebrities!

Among the many off the wall things ladies do to be known, baby mama(ism) seems working. It seems welcomed. It is less criticised. It is in fact, becoming a bureau, a walk of life, in the Entertainment industry. These ladies are in the mainstream, as a matter of fact. They are well-liked, and going by how they carry themselves, they are quite confident doing what they do.They share pictures that people spend their leisure discussing. 'Baby mama' sounds as suitable and imposing. It sounds neat and pleasing, that a fairly old-fashioned african would ask, are baby mamas too celebrities?

Who is a celebrity? Someone who is popular and has honour! Someone who is famous and distinguished. Celibritatum (a latin word) and celebrate (an English verb) both gave birth to the communal word 'celebrity.' While cellibritatum refers to popularity, celebrate means: To honour. If you are renowned without honour, you are not different from Evans, the popular criminal, or is he a celebrity too? If you are famous without being distinguished, you are not different from the popular mad man in my town. Everyone knows him, can we then call him a celebrity? What honour, have a baby mama? What honour have a mother, outside wedlock? What honour have a girl whose nude pics are all-over? What honour have an unmarried lady, who shares after-sex pics? What honour have a popular Olosho, who makes her cool cash? If I call Chiamanda Adichie a celebrity, what would you call your favourite Baby mama?

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

Martin0:
Hahahahahah na wa oo
Me and my Ex had the best communication I can ever imagine...
And till date we are best friends despite she's married to my friend

I just hope the husband won't kill you anytime soon.

junnyjake:
That's sad Bro.

She needs to know how bad her actions are hurting you.

If nothing changes, let me know. I'd assist you in teaching that Ex a lesson, nobody would tell him to not only lose her number but change his sim card and cut off every form of communication.

Sometimes, violence is the only way.

Cheers!

Don't complicate things bro.

GraGra247:
Na lie, good girls are getting married too.

Infact there's hardly any left cos they're all married off.

They marry faster than slay queens.

Get your facts right.

Are u 4 real?

What Do Men Actually Want?

Ask my friend, he would tell you the beauty of finding the right girl.He knows the boon of having a comely lady. Harry would tell you, the right girl is the pretty one, who has high intelligence quotient.The one, who has high emotional slice too. My Homie's dream lady is the soft, humble, gentle, caring and decent young woman. He likes her darling and leany. He likes her shy and neat.

Taking a look at online forums too, guys hurl insults at slay queens, like they dislike them.They call them names.They kick when big boobs are on display.They come out with reproach and scolding, when ladies show up nude. About such girls, someone said, "Most girls naturally no just get sense.Thinking it's all about the booty, mumu.What is the job of the butty, na shit full their o.. what is attracted to shit, flies!! make up, and booty, can only catch a man's attention for a short while, no matter how fine or big! It only takes a woman with intelligence to keep a man, and mold that man into greatness..."

"A woman with a beautiful face is only good for a night, but a woman with a beautiful heart is good for a lifetime," some boys would easily lecture. Even, celebrities are quick to reveal how big boobs, catchy boots and sexy figures are just not important. AY, the comedian, recently said to ladies, "wear all the makeup today, you won't find any man, if you are brainless."

This is the confusion. Despite the negative comments from males, Slay queens get rich easily and flaunt their luxuries.Who pays them? guys, right? Most surprising is that they get married in a flash.Who marries them? guys, right? Rich ones for that matter.Whearas, the much dreamt-of good girls are out there, tight, single and waiting. Even, Harry my friend becomes dumb and deaf when he, by chance, sights a big thing. What is the secret? Where lies my ignorance? Do slay queens go extra mile? Are big boobs bags of charm? Do good girls intimidate men with their brilliance? Are men confused, or what actually, do they want?


Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist. faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

What Do Men Actually Want?

Ask my friend, he would tell you the beauty of finding the right girl.He knows the boon of having a comely lady. Harry would tell you, the right girl is the pretty one, who has high intelligence quotient.The one, who has high emotional slice too. My Homie's dream lady is the soft, humble, gentle, caring and decent young woman. He likes her darling and leany. He likes her shy and neat.

Taking a look at online forums too, guys hurl insults at slay queens, like they dislike them.They call them names.They kick when big boobs are on display.They come out with reproach and scolding, when ladies show up nude. About such girls, someone said, "Most girls naturally no just get sense.Thinking it's all about the booty, mumu.What is the job of the butty, na shit full their o.. what is attracted to shit, flies!! make up, and booty, can only catch a man's attention for a short while, no matter how fine or big! It only takes a woman with intelligence to keep a man, and mold that man into greatness..."

"A woman with a beautiful face is only good for a night, but a woman with a beautiful heart is good for a lifetime," some boys would easily lecture. Even, celebrities are quick to reveal how big boobs, catchy boots and sexy figures are just not important. AY, the comedian, recently said to ladies, "wear all the makeup today, you won't find any man, if you are brainless."

This is the confusion. Despite the negative comments from males, Slay queens get rich easily and flaunt their luxuries.Who pays them? guys, right? Most surprising is that they get married in a flash.Who marries them? guys, right? Rich ones for that matter.Whearas, the much dreamt-of good girls are out there, tight, single and waiting. Even, Harry my friend becomes dumb and deaf when he, by chance, sights a big thing. What is the secret? Where lies my ignorance? Do slay queens go extra mile? Are big boobs bags of charm? Do good girls intimidate men with their brilliance? Are men confused, or what actually, do they want?


Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist. faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

Please, Help Me Beg Olamide!

I love Olamide very differently.I admire many things about him.He's kinda more matured, cured and prepared than many celebrities in the Nigerian Music industry.He has a neat height, a fitting build and lips.He's handsome, you know? He has a bleeding heart too. He speaks good English, and about his like candy voice, what can I say? He has helped to limelight, quite a lot. Badoo seems always original. He doesn't fake things. I couldn't make it to his OlIC 4 and for that, I'm not too happy.

Who doesn't know, that Wizkid won big at the iHeart radio Awards. Wizkid won BET best international act, Africa. Daddy yo took home, the prize for AFRIMA best African male artiste in western Africa, he won MOBO best international act, just like Davido walked away with AFRIMMA artiste of the year gold star, MTV best African act, MOBO best African act and Future Award musician of the year.To crown it all, the duo were ranked among the most influential young Africans. All this happened in 2017. Where was my Olamide? Where was the king of the streets?

Please, help me beg Olamide. Help me tell him to leave his Lagos comfort.Tell badoo, the whole world wants to hear wobe sound. Tell him he can also shut down Africa.He can shut down America.Is he not beyond a small town act? He's a long way off a local artiste. What's wrong with Olamide? Is he feeling too proud to approach foreign superstars for a collabo? Maybe he feels he would be rejected. Is he afraid of footing the bill? He doesn't want to spend money? Is he feeling inferior, low-grade or substandard?

The world itself is not standing still, so, anyone who wants to remain on the button must keep moving.Time is quite precious and is not worth handling with levity.Is Olamide not aware that Lagos is now more beautiful than she used to be? Does he not know, that the streets are no longer as rough and ugly? Just the same way, people's music taste changes.Guys prefer world class cars, world class houses.They crave for world standard fashion and world standard musicians too. The whole world is fast becoming a small room and only those, who strive for a space remain important.

Please, help me beg Olamide.Tell him it doesn't take so long to be blanked out and erased. It takes a few days to be forgotten and termed irrelevant. Open up, that people now tag him a local musician and such a stature is not just wonderful. He's getting side-tracked.Tell him guys now discuss Davido and Wizkid, without mentioning his name. Tell him not to wait till he would start running around, pleading for relevance. Just that, no matter what, nothing in this world is worth selling one's soul to the devil for.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

Your Excellency, Why Not Leave Us In Libya?


Your Excellency, the president, federal Republic of Nigeria and commander in chief of armed forces.We are overly indebted to your heart and affection, the sympathy and sweetness, that made you make preparations, very promptly, to fetch us back to Nigeria, our father land. It is, indeed, a thing of delight, that our dear country was so worried about us, that she, without wasting time, prevented us from being sold to slavery.Who wants to be a slave?

We only seeked a good life, for ourselves, abroad. We only chased a greener pasture. But, what we experienced in our adventure, would make the whole world shed tears.It was a horrible experience in Libya. It was not fine away from home.

Many of us left home as graduates, some of us, even, left with second degree.Some left parents, and others left children in Nigeria, with a promise of relish when we return. Some left with a single apparel and some, without clothes at all. We left, after struggling hard in Nigeria, to no avail. We left when we almost died of hunger.We left, when our certificates were useless and there was no electricity to sustain our businesses.

We left, so that our aged parents would not die of wants and lacks. Our children were dying of malnutrition, so, we were desperate to make money in a foreign land. All of us, wanted a good life Nigeria could not offer. Mr president sir, this is the point. As unhealthy as slavery is, not all of us detest it, can Nigeria offer anything better? As slaves, our mouths would be padlocked, so that we don't consume their sugar cane, but they would definitely give us three square meal.

We would be piled up in tens and twenties, in a room, but we would definitely have a roof on our head.No one cares for slaves, but, they would definitely take us to hospitals when we fall sick, at least to make us live longer in their service.They would surely give us clothes, so that we don't die of cold. They would freely give us water to drink and take our bathe. They would let us have tooth paste to tidy our mouths in the morning.

All these basic things, can we enjoy, even as citizens, in Nigeria? Are we not going back to lagos, where we would buy, even a bucket of water? Are we not going back to Oshodi, to sleep under bridge? Is this not Nigeria, where nothing guarantees a single meal in three days? Is this not Nigeria, where a cadet would just flog you anyhow, not minding if you have something in your stomach?

Is this not Nigeria, where hospitals are empty, and the few equipped ones are reserved for the rich? Is this not Nigeria, where a graduate can't afford a toothbrush? Is this not the oil producing country, where senators pocket, every month, what an average worker would receive in 50years? Is this not Nigeria, where a yahoo boy eats faeces with bread, just to make ends meet? In Nigeria, if you sleep with your head tonight, you may wake up with only the neck tomorrow. Is this not Nigeria, where nothing is working?

Just like the Israelites asked moses in the wilderness, Mr president, why not leave us as slaves, where we would, at least, enjoy a meal per day? Your Excellency, why not leave us in lybia to be sold? For the Israelites, it was a tough journey to the promised land, but for us, for us in Nigeria, isn't it going to be a rough journey to no-one-knows-where? Isn't it going to be from fry pan to fire? Aren't we home to die of algor and chill, dryness and starvation?Well, thank you Mr President for your kind gesture.

The above is just my imagination of what an average returnee would think. Ask them, just ask them, what they have in mind. Sincerely, the federal government has done well in bringing them home. But here, in their father land, woud life be any pretty?


Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

The Right Man's Dick!

Everyone is talking about enlarging his dick.Everyone is crazy about adding a little meat.They desire a chock-full, bull and burly cork. The modern girl too, have eyes on a whale of a willy.She seems too wild to be won by anything less than a horse's size schlong, so, the internet is home to many grow it big drugs advert. It is 'make your manhood bigger' here, 'increase your penis' size' there. Is it really necessary? Is it all-important? Is a pole size dick needed to keep a woman? Do you need a gigantic manhood to really be a man? Why would a woman file divorce because her man has an average prick? Why would a grown man feel less manly because his thing is 5" tall?

Information has it, that an average girl needs an average manhood to be appeased.The female genital has the zenithal band of exciting nerves between the first and third inch inside, and, an average penis, 5" long, would do the magic.On the side, the female vagina is flexible, and needs not a Jumbo-mundo penis to be thrilled. Sex itself goes beyond the man's dick, emotions play a significant role. So, why inject drugs to make a penis fat, without considering, the might-be unfortunate aftermath? Why spend a fortune on drugs that might not have an effect, but leave you with cancer, all in a bid to increase your hunk? Why attempt surgery that might close an eternal door to your sexual performance?

The bigger the prick, the better the sex, is a common buzz among ladies, but, such a guess is true ,only in the fancy. In fact, a big manhood was a thing of scorn, disdain and contempt in the prior days of human real world, as revealed in Aristotle's novel, the satyricon. Big manhood used to be a no-no. Anyways, Instead of going about, searching for a big dick, why not dream of the right man's dick? Yes, the right man's dick is just the best for you! Sex is better and more fun with the man your heart really wants. That prince charming you have always dreamt of, who would be handsome, fun to be with, caring and loving, would also have the right hunk. That man, whose personality best suits you, has the best dong too. So, wait for him, grab him, marry him, and he will deliver. If he doesn't, let him exercise his body, work on flexibility and reduce sugar intake.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com


(Uncle G exports and supplies processed Ground nut, on wholesale
damvalots_ent@yahoo.com)

The Right Man's Dick!

Everyone is talking about enlarging his dick.Everyone is crazy about adding a little meat.They desire a chock-full, bull and burly cork. The modern girl too, have eyes on a whale of a willy.She seems too wild to be won by anything less than a horse's size schlong, so, the internet is home to many grow it big drugs advert. It is 'make your manhood bigger' here, 'increase your penis' size' there. Is it really necessary? Is it all-important? Is a pole size dick needed to keep a woman? Do you need a gigantic manhood to really be a man? Why would a woman file divorce because her man has an average prick? Why would a grown man feel less manly because his thing is 5" tall?

Information has it, that an average girl needs an average manhood to be appeased.The female genital has the zenithal band of exciting nerves between the first and third inch inside, and, an average penis, 5" long, would do the magic.On the side, the female vagina is flexible, and needs not a Jumbo-mundo penis to be thrilled. Sex itself goes beyond the man's dick, emotions play a significant role. So, why inject drugs to make a penis fat, without considering, the might-be unfortunate aftermath? Why spend a fortune on drugs that might not have an effect, but leave you with cancer, all in a bid to increase your hunk? Why attempt surgery that might close an eternal door to your sexual performance?

The bigger the prick, the better the sex, is a common buzz among ladies, but, such a guess is true ,only in the fancy. In fact, a big manhood was a thing of scorn, disdain and contempt in the prior days of human real world, as revealed in Aristotle's novel, the satyricon. Big manhood used to be a no-no. Anyways, Instead of going about, searching for a big dick, why not dream of the right man's dick? Yes, the right man's dick is just the best for you! Sex is better and more fun with the man your heart really wants. That prince charming you have always dreamt of, who would be handsome, fun to be with, caring and loving, would also have the right hunk. That man, whose personality best suits you, has the best dong too. So, wait for him, grab him, marry him, and he will deliver. If he doesn't, let him exercise his body, work on flexibility and reduce sugar intake.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com


(Uncle G exports and supplies processed Ground nut, on wholesale damvalots_ent@yahoo.com)

*The Little Child and School, Mistakes African Parents Make.*

On a cute monday morning, you would behold African children, sobbing and wailing. You would spot a barely 2yrs old, making do with tears. You would see a soft and crimeless under-age, weeping heavily while holding water bottle and food flask in a small basket. On a good-looking morning, you would see an African mother, holding a cane, flogging and forcing her child into a monstrous school bus.These young ones would rather spend time with their parents.They would rather stay close to their mothers, all day.They would, by choice, cling to their fathers' necks and play with their moustache.They don't want to go to school! They are afraid of some cruel and unnatural teachers, who would always nag. They are afraid of friends, who would make jest of their tummies and big heads. So, they cry and ask questions. Mummy, why? Why can't I stay with you? Why must I go to that school?

African mothers are not inhumane, you know? They are not heartless. In all conscience, they are not callous.They only think, that the lone way to success is school. They only want their children to make a fortune on the dot, so, they don't mind taking them to school, too early. They don't mind letting them go through psychical torture, when they are, yet, very vulnerable. They don't want to know how badly a teacher hurts their children, as long as he teaches them good mathematics.They don't mind if a school would kill their children in the heart, as long as it promises academic excellence. African parents hate it, when a child comes home with average grades. They want him to have all distinctions without considering his strength and intelligence. They would personally aflict and mistreat, with words, canes and/or food, a child who comes home with poor grades, even when he had put in his best. They would treat him with objection, a child who refuses to top the class. Do you know how teachers abuse children in some schools, just to make them have good grades(that their parents blindly demanded)? Have you not heard of a high school, where in the middle of the term, students would be assembled, and the best three students of each class, would be given prices while the last ten, would be mercilessly beaten and humiliated? Some even put their children in boarding schools, when they are, yet, very soft and tender. When they need parental warmth more. All these, to make the child get the best of school.

Thomas edison was an American child in the 18s.Like other children of his time, he was enrolled in a school, where he spent just 12weeks before his teacher grew fed up. He noted, that little Tom's forehead was unusually broad, and, that he had a bigger head than normal. He summed up, that the child's brains were either mixed up, unglued or scrambled, the reason he would ask too much questions. When Tom's mother heard of the teacher's dislike for her son, she withdrew him from school and decided to keep his son to herself. That was the end of formal education for Tom. His mother taught him at home, believing that her little son's unusual behaviour, and slightly odd physical appearance were merely outward signs of his remarkable intelligence. Could you believe, that Tom grew up to be famous Thomas Alva Edison, the greatest inventor of his time, with 1,093 American patents? The whole world owe to Tom, the light bulb, among his many works.

This is the tittle, School is appropriate, but, her judgement shouldn't settle your picture of that little child. Poor grades doesn't suggest, that your son's future is bleary. That a child is not academically alive and kicking, shouldn't make you conclude he/she is substandard. School is fine, but, you shouldn't exchange the parental warmth and closeness your daughter deserves for the best of it. School is hygienic, but, it's not worth sacrificing your Son's whole length happiness and emotional health for. Why must you look away when a teacher maltreats your child? Is class work a genuine proof that your daughter's morrow is bright? Stop treating, with contempt, that kid, who would not perform too well in class, not everyone would be a Doctor, not all would be lawyers. Stop making life a bit much for that child, who could not leave school with accolades. Do not humiliate your child because he/she is not as brilliant as others, you never can tell, what the future holds.Can't African Mothers, treat, with love and compassion, that not bookish child, who might just be another Thomas Edison in the making? When the School concludes he's low-grade, tell him he's tall and uncommon.Tell him he's a whiz kid. Must you expose your Tom to school, when he's just a year old? Let him enjoy your warmth and love a little.Why not take your time to fit him out for the tribulations ahead? Why not fortify him pretty much for the trials of learning? Believe in your child, when others underestimate him. Welcome him with love, when teachers and friends chase him out with ridicule. Do not call him, good for nothing, when his report sheet is bloody. Do not sacrifice his happiness on the altar of mathematics. Encourage him, when the school concludes he's just a dullard. Let him lean on you, and, you would help him prove the school wrong.


_Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist._
_faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com_

No Vacancy In Aso Rock! A Curse?

A few have told the story of how Nigeria was over and above unkempt before President Buhari came on board. Some mixed it up, and pleaded, that as President, Baba was frustrated, cramped and crimped by the cabal. Many also presented claims that retired General Muhammadu would have performed magics if not for the very corrupt Judiciary. Nigerian constitution itself has been fingered as one reason our president could not perform to expectation. A handful blamed Baba's ministers while others sticked it to Senators and Reps.Maybe it is true. Maybe Buhari has precious plans for our Nation.Maybe he has super-excellent and up to snuff sketch. Maybe he actually loves Nigeria. Who knows, Baba might really want to do rara avis, but helpless, due to certain people, certain things and/or systems.But, Now that he seems to seek re-election, should we compensate his helplessness with another four years?

The National executive council of the APC met in Abuja few days ago.They mulled over an automatic second term ticket for Buhari as the party's candidate in the 2019 presidential election.The motion was moved by one Alhaji Nosiru and seconded by sanni Yerima. In the process of such important groupthink, some APC state chairmen shouted from the back, "No vacancy in Aso rock!" A five word sentence that got me thinking.Would an average Nigerian see those few words as a curse or otherwise? Is there no vacancy for real? Has anti-corruption shoot earned for Baba, another four years? Has the helipad, built in daura, delivered Nigerians to him again? Has the disbursement, to states, of paris loan refund won for Muhammadu Nigerians' hearts? I wish it's a YES. But, If otherwise, those chairmen are the comedians of the year.In fact, they would then deserve six strokes of Koboko. Nigerians elected Buhari in 2015, so that, he would make certain, reasonable and judicious use of their wealth.So that, Baba would generate, transmit and distribute up to 50, 000 MW, in a view to having 24/7 power supply.They voted Buhari, for the anticipated creation of about three million jobs per year. We expected him to make the economy, one of the fastest growing in the world.To make sure All political office holders earn only the salaries and emoluments determined and approved by the Revenue Mobilisation and Fiscal Commission (RMFAC). But, where are we now?

As of this morning, despite the many pre-election promises of 2015, Nigerian children still die of malnutrition. Old people still drop off for hunger and thirst.Graduates still sweat like lagos and their mothers make do with flowing tears. Fuel price is yet very high. Fine girls still network their bodies for a meal. So many unclothed Nigerians in the street.Terrorists still kill anyhow.Policemen still take bribes while soldiers have not stopped brutalising civilians. Nigerians toil without fruits.We wail without comfort.Songs of war here and there, so, everyone wants to cross the border. Baba, Nigerian politicians still enjoy unprecedented luxury, whereas, an average Nigerian wants very little. He only wants his children to eat well and be healthy.He wants his kids to enjoy quality education. He wants a safe place to hide his head and those of his family in the night. He wants water and regular electricity supply. He only wants good health care. He desires motorable roads. Are all these too much to ask?

What were those chairmen thinking when they shouted, "No vacancy in Aso rock" with such appetite and turn on. What made them say it with such fluency and breeze. Such effrontery and audacity. I don't blame them! I blame Nigerians, who would never ask: HOW? When politicians make promises. We don't create time to ask: by what means? By what method? And, by whose help? when they swear. We don't care if they have knowledge of what governance looks like.We would not ask if they are vast in the situation on ground before boasting and romancing us.We would not test their ingenuity, neither would we question their industry. So, someone would later tell us how Jonathan was a good man but unable to deliver, due to witches and wizards. Another would tell us how Buhari meant well, but, hindered by the cabal.Someone would then narrate how the President had good plans but the economy was too messy. As a matter of sincerity, Baba has opened our eyes to anti-corruption campaign. He has, at least, sensitized us on the need for transparency in governance, and, those men have also spoken.They have expressed their own minds.They have told us how there was "no vacancy in Aso rock." But, Nigerians know, if such mouth-talk, was a curse, or otherwise.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

"I Don't Want A Girl Child!"

"I don't want to have a girl child", someone said, and, when I got the knack of his excuses, I couldn't but think twice over my dream of having, at least, a beautiful female child. I used to picture her pretty, slim, intelligent, natural and innocent.I used to visualize a girl child, who would perch on my shoulder while I tell her stories of the tortoise and the hen. I used to see a future daughter, who would be found of me and shout Dad! Dad!! in the house.I had desired a daughter, with whom I'll play football in the compound.I used to want a girl, whom I would adorn with expensive clothes and jewelries. A daughter I would treat like a princess and worship.I wanted to name her Ewatomi, But, now, I'm afraid!

Did the girl child, all at once, realise she's without value? Does she now see herself as made for men's buzz, and that alone? Does she think she's made to make boys feel good? Was she designed, just for boys' amusement and turn-on? In the strippers' club, you would see without-clothes girls, gallivanting and selling it cheap.They would allow you handle their boobs, if you can pay.They would allow you do most nutty and slaphappy things with their bodies for a valueless naira note.The other day, A girl wrote this on specialspesh(Davido's friend)' s wall on instagram, " D Bleep way you Bleep me for free way you promised me toyota Corolla car way u ne er still fulfill naa thurnder go strike u one day." What has come over the latest girl child? In the University, almost every girl is a hoe! Some are in the sex business, while some lay around just for the fun of it. Seeing a young boy take tramadol, cialis, levitra, viagra codeine etc, one would wonder who the victim of such make her cry anal rampage would be.She's the innocent-looking 17yrs old daddy's girl.

Isn't It demeaning, that 10 unclad, grown up ladies would twist and bunny hop around a fully clothed boy, all in the name of shooting a musical video? Isn't it worth crying for, that some 5 ladies would pride and joy in being baby Mamas for a small fry celebrity? Isn't it sorry and touching, that a girl would, with zeal, pose naked and 24 carat original for a shot? Haven't you seen a pretty young girl, expose her almost-bare vulva to the coldness of camera flashes? Isn't it pesky, that ladies now delight more pleasure in twerking than contributing anything intelligible to the society? Isn't it ugly? If a guy would boast, he would, of the number of girls he's had free sex with! He would boast of how recklessly, he bleeped that hijab-wearing girl.He would boast of how he, without mercy, ravished that lady, who doesn't wear hear rings.He would, of how a Pastor's daughter came begging for more, after a war-like bed session.Ask some guy out there, He's got more than fifteen girls shouting for help.

Someone seems to have untied the girl child into nothingness.Someone seems to have primed her on being a low-grade mortal.She seems to have endorsed and taken stock in being made for men's pick-me-up alone.She seems aware of herself being only an easy mark for sexual pleasure.She now understands how the best she can offer is her curves and boobs.She's like too afraid of being irrelevant, that she wants to lay bare, what's under her pant, if that would bring about attention.Let those punching out for gender equality stop wasting time, the girl child has accepted defeat! The ministry of women affairs should change name, ladies seem more comfortable as mere blow jobbers.

I would have said, that I would
instill in my own daughter ethics and ideals, but, will it make a difference? I would have sworn to bring her up very religiously, but Pastors' daughters seem not too good.I would have planned to give her a sky-scraping education, but, those ladies who went to Cambridge, don't they end up in the street nude? I would have decided to make life so comfortable for and give her every little thing she needs, but, daughters of rich parents are not different.I would have promised to shower attention on her, but, those of caring and tender parents also end up giving free sex.I would, then, have promised to be tough on my own girl and always flog brain into her, but, daughters of such parents end up living couples' lives in school, cooking and receiving Bob doles on a daily basis. Nothing seem enough to stop a girl from going wild. Nothing seem enough to make her see herself as special and the best thing that has happened to the world.If you chastise her, it's trouble. If you don't at all, it is problem.So, Isn't it better not to give birth to a girl at all?



Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

Lawlahdey:
Deep. You know what i think about this? The truth is the average female don't have the strength or ability required for day-to-day jobs. The average female is work-lazy. She wants things to come to her on a platter of gold and in a country like Nigeria, that's quite impossible. So, she resorts to selling her body because that's the only way to have it easy.

Oh!!!! I c

"I Don't Want A Girl Child!"

"I don't want to have a girl child", someone said, and, when I got the knack of his excuses, I couldn't but think twice over my dream of having, at least, a beautiful female child. I used to picture her pretty, slim, intelligent, natural and innocent.I used to visualize a girl child, who would perch on my shoulder while I tell her stories of the tortoise and the hen. I used to see a future daughter, who would be found of me and shout Dad! Dad!! in the house.I had desired a daughter, with whom I'll play football in the compound.I used to want a girl, whom I would adorn with expensive clothes and jewelries. A daughter I would treat like a princess and worship.I wanted to name her Ewatomi, But, now, I'm afraid!

Did the girl child, all at once, realise she's without value? Does she now see herself as made for men's buzz, and that alone? Does she think she's made to make boys feel good? Was she designed, just for boys' amusement and turn-on? In the strippers' club, you would see without-clothes girls, gallivanting and selling it cheap.They would allow you handle their boobs, if you can pay.They would allow you do most nutty and slaphappy things with their bodies for a valueless naira note.The other day, A girl wrote this on specialspesh(Davido's friend)' s wall on instagram, " D Bleep way you Bleep me for free way you promised me toyota Corolla car way u ne er still fulfill naa thurnder go strike u one day." What has come over the latest girl child? In the University, almost every girl is a hoe! Some are in the sex business, while some lay around just for the fun of it. Seeing a young boy take tramadol, cialis, levitra, viagra codeine etc, one would wonder who the victim of such make her cry anal rampage would be.She's the innocent-looking 17yrs old daddy's girl.

Isn't It demeaning, that 10 unclad, grown up ladies would twist and bunny hop around a fully clothed boy, all in the name of shooting a musical video? Isn't it worth crying for, that some 5 ladies would pride and joy in being baby Mamas for a small fry celebrity? Isn't it sorry and touching, that a girl would, with zeal, pose naked and 24 carat original for a shot? Haven't you seen a pretty young girl, expose her almost-bare vulva to the coldness of camera flashes? Isn't it pesky, that ladies now delight more pleasure in twerking than contributing anything intelligible to the society? Isn't it ugly? If a guy would boast, he would, of the number of girls he's had free sex with! He would boast of how recklessly, he bleeped that hijab-wearing girl.He would boast of how he, without mercy, ravished that lady, who doesn't wear hear rings.He would, of how a Pastor's daughter came begging for more, after a war-like bed session.Ask some guy out there, He's got more than fifteen girls shouting for help.

Someone seems to have untied the girl child into nothingness.Someone seems to have primed her on being a low-grade mortal.She seems to have endorsed and taken stock in being made for men's pick-me-up alone.She seems aware of herself being only an easy mark for sexual pleasure.She now understands how the best she can offer is her curves and boobs.She's like too afraid of being irrelevant, that she wants to lay bare, what's under her pant, if that would bring about attention.Let those punching out for gender equality stop wasting time, the girl child has accepted defeat! The ministry of women affairs should change name, ladies seem more comfortable as mere blow jobbers.

I would have said, that I would
instill in my own daughter ethics and ideals, but, will it make a difference? I would have sworn to bring her up very religiously, but Pastors' daughters seem not too good.I would have planned to give her a sky-scraping education, but, those ladies who went to Cambridge, don't they end up in the street nude? I would have decided to make life so comfortable for and give her every little thing she needs, but, daughters of rich parents are not different.I would have promised to shower attention on her, but, those of caring and tender parents also end up giving free sex.I would, then, have promised to be tough on my own girl and always flog brain into her, but, daughters of such parents end up living couples' lives in school, cooking and receiving Bob doles on a daily basis. Nothing seem enough to stop a girl from going wild. Nothing seem enough to make her see herself as special and the best thing that has happened to the world.If you chastise her, it's trouble. If you don't at all, it is problem.So, Isn't it better not to give birth to a girl at all?



Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

On My Graduation Day, The Happiness I Couldn't Find.

The Madness I Couldn't Display!


I'm now a graduate(just in case you don't know), and, life in school wasn't with no stress.It is a place of yearning, sweeth tooth, holding up and donkeywork, that is named University.A place of So many ups, so many downs.So many challenges, so many milestones.Many nights of no-sleep, many exams and tests.So many pretty girls I loved but couldn't walk up to.Life was so up for grabs.It was a uphill battle.Those times I expected "As" only to see "Bs". Sometimes, I fell sick during exams and could not read.What a day, when I was in the hospital for treatment and missed a paper.Those times love went caustic and the whole world was a cell.Those times I admired my friends' Ralph Lauren polo and elastic autumn pants but did not have the means.The pang of writing a carryover course with juniors.I remember waking up early to take my bath with cold water in the prime of hammatern.Well, all those times have fallen behind, they have expired in my booklet today. I have submitted a part of my history, and, gone are the days.I have written my final paper!

Isn't today worth celebrating? Shouldn't I be flying high and on cloud nine? Shouldn't I be walking on air? Shouldn't I take a thousand photographs, dine and wine with friends and neighbours? Shouldn't I whoop it up and kibitz around in seventh heaven? Shouldn't I pop champagne and spend money like a man? In the eyes of fellow graduants, there was no absolute happiness.There was no for real madness.Those who looked like jubilant only faked it.Those who looked delighted were not original.Those who danced were not actual. Some of them laughed but their eyes grieved. Some, in their quest to display legitimate madness, drank alcohol, yet, their lunacy was not 24 carat.Isn't happiness from within and not otherwise? The kind of happiness that accompanies being given a US visa was absent.The high spirits that accompanies the news of appointing someone's dad a minister was away.The euphoria that escorts being declared the winner of a pageantry did not honour our invitation.So many make-up our ladies wore to celebrate themselves, yet, the ecosystem was mundane.Why? Why couldn't I feel good in the flesh? Why couldn't my colleagues be possessed by beautiful psychosis like they just achieved something great? Why was that sense of fulfillment shy? I should be walking differently by now.My footsteps should tell a stranger that I'm now a graduate.But, I feel like nothing has changed! Because in Nigeria, B.sc is almost good-for-nothing.Graduates have almost no hope.First degree in this part of the world is a joke.Look through your window, see them pushing wheel barrows, see them helping farmers make heaps.See them carrying heavy loads on the street of portharcourt.They are hawking bread, they are hawking sachetwater and sweating like lagos.They sleep with empty bellies.They are graduates!

If we were in the good old days, when Corporate bodies would be in the running for young school leavers.If Nigeria was Canada or America, If I was a citizen of Paris, somewhere in France, I would have started preparing for today since January.I would have notified my family and friends since February.I would have got a loan from diamond bank to hire a car that would have conveyed me around on this great day.I would have bought for myself an expensive wine.I would have organized a party, where people would have eaten, and made merry,while I go write my final paper.I would have requested the service of a professional photographer.I would have danced like a prima ballerina.I would have been overtaken by sweet madness for few minutes.I would have bought an overpriced shirt for people to sign on, and, finally, I wouldn't have been writing this, instead, I would be somewhere catching fun!

Well,now that I'm a graduate, I will miss my colleagues and friends.I will miss my lecturers too.I will miss Tobi and Flakes.I will miss Vincent and Henry.I will miss school-life, those nights of tales and cheap talks.I will miss Tolu and Josh.So many people will I miss that I can't mention.Oh God! You've been faithful.Please raise for our Nigeria, selfless leaders, who would make Nigerian education worth the stress.Leaders who would create wealth and not just spend our common goodies.Leaders that would solve the nightmare called unemployment.Leaders that would rather die than watch things go bald.Hmmm..., To all new graduates, Congratulations!

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

On My Graduation Day, The Happiness I Couldn't Find.

The Madness I Couldn't Display!


I'm now a graduate(just in case you don't know), and, life in school wasn't with no stress.It is a place of yearning, sweeth tooth, holding up and donkeywork, that is named University.A place of So many ups, so many downs.So many challenges, so many milestones.Many nights of no-sleep, many exams and tests.So many pretty girls I loved but couldn't walk up to.Life was so up for grabs.It was a uphill battle.Those times I expected "As" only to see "Bs". Sometimes, I fell sick during exams and could not read.What a day, when I was in the hospital for treatment and missed a paper.Those times love went caustic and the whole world was a cell.Those times I admired my friends' Ralph Lauren polo and elastic autumn pants but did not have the means.The pang of writing a carryover course with juniors.I remember waking up early to take my bath with cold water in the prime of hammatern.Well, all those times have fallen behind, they have expired in my booklet today. I have submitted a part of my history, and, gone are the days.I have written my final paper!

Isn't today worth celebrating? Shouldn't I be flying high and on cloud nine? Shouldn't I be walking on air? Shouldn't I take a thousand photographs, dine and wine with friends and neighbours? Shouldn't I whoop it up and kibitz around in seventh heaven? Shouldn't I pop champagne and spend money like a man? In the eyes of fellow graduants, there was no absolute happiness.There was no for real madness.Those who looked like jubilant only faked it.Those who looked delighted were not original.Those who danced were not actual. Some of them laughed but their eyes grieved. Some, in their quest to display legitimate madness, drank alcohol, yet, their lunacy was not 24 carat.Isn't happiness from within and not otherwise? The kind of happiness that accompanies being given a US visa was absent.The high spirits that accompanies the news of appointing someone's dad a minister was away.The euphoria that escorts being declared the winner of a pageantry did not honour our invitation.So many make-up our ladies wore to celebrate themselves, yet, the ecosystem was mundane.Why? Why couldn't I feel good in the flesh? Why couldn't my colleagues be possessed by beautiful psychosis like they just achieved something great? Why was that sense of fulfillment shy? I should be walking differently by now.My footsteps should tell a stranger that I'm now a graduate.But, I feel like nothing has changed! Because in Nigeria, B.sc is almost good-for-nothing.Graduates have almost no hope.First degree in this part of the world is a joke.Look through your window, see them pushing wheel barrows, see them helping farmers make heaps.See them carrying heavy loads on the street of portharcourt.They are hawking bread, they are hawking sachetwater and sweating like lagos.They sleep with empty bellies.They are graduates!

If we were in the good old days, when Corporate bodies would be in the running for young school leavers.If Nigeria was Canada or America, If I was a citizen of Paris, somewhere in France, I would have started preparing for today since January.I would have notified my family and friends since February.I would have got a loan from diamond bank to hire a car that would have conveyed me around on this great day.I would have bought for myself an expensive wine.I would have organized a party, where people would have eaten, and made merry,while I go write my final paper.I would have requested the service of a professional photographer.I would have danced like a prima ballerina.I would have been overtaken by sweet madness for few minutes.I would have bought an overpriced shirt for people to sign on, and, finally, I wouldn't have been writing this, instead, I would be somewhere catching fun!

Well,now that I'm a graduate, I will miss my colleagues and friends.I will miss my lecturers too.I will miss Tobi and Flakes.I will miss Vincent and Henry.I will miss school-life, those nights of tales and cheap talks.I will miss Tolu and Josh.So many people will I miss that I can't mention.Oh God! You've been faithful.Please raise for our Nigeria, selfless leaders, who would make Nigerian education worth the stress.Leaders who would create wealth and not just spend our common goodies.Leaders that would solve the nightmare called unemployment.Leaders that would rather die than watch things go bald.Hmmm..., To all new graduates, Congratulations!

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

On My Graduation Day, The Happiness I Couldn't Find.

The Madness I Couldn't Display!


I'm now a graduate(just in case you don't know), and, life in school wasn't with no stress.It is a place of yearning, sweeth tooth, holding up and donkeywork, that is named University.A place of So many ups, so many downs.So many challenges, so many milestones.Many nights of no-sleep, many exams and tests.So many pretty girls I loved but couldn't walk up to.Life was so up for grabs.It was a uphill battle.Those times I expected "As" only to see "Bs". Sometimes, I fell sick during exams and could not read.What a day, when I was in the hospital for treatment and missed a paper.Those times love went caustic and the whole world was a cell.Those times I admired my friends' Ralph Lauren polo and elastic autumn pants but did not have the means.The pang of writing a carryover course with juniors.I remember waking up early to take my bath with cold water in the prime of hammatern.Well, all those times have fallen behind, they have expired in my booklet today. I have submitted a part of my history, and, gone are the days.I have written my final paper!

Isn't today worth celebrating? Shouldn't I be flying high and on cloud nine? Shouldn't I be walking on air? Shouldn't I take a thousand photographs, dine and wine with friends and neighbours? Shouldn't I whoop it up and kibitz around in seventh heaven? Shouldn't I pop champagne and spend money like a man? In the eyes of fellow graduants, there was no absolute happiness.There was no for real madness.Those who looked like jubilant only faked it.Those who looked delighted were not original.Those who danced were not actual. Some of them laughed but their eyes grieved. Some, in their quest to display legitimate madness, drank alcohol, yet, their lunacy was not 24 carat.Isn't happiness from within and not otherwise? The kind of happiness that accompanies being given a US visa was absent.The high spirits that accompanies the news of appointing someone's dad a minister was away.The euphoria that escorts being declared the winner of a pageantry did not honour our invitation.So many make-up our ladies wore to celebrate themselves, yet, the ecosystem was mundane.Why? Why couldn't I feel good in the flesh? Why couldn't my colleagues be possessed by beautiful psychosis like they just achieved something great? Why was that sense of fulfillment shy? I should be walking differently by now.My footsteps should tell a stranger that I'm now a graduate.But, I feel like nothing has changed! Because in Nigeria, B.sc is almost good-for-nothing.Graduates have almost no hope.First degree in this part of the world is a joke.Look through your window, see them pushing wheel barrows, see them helping farmers make heaps.See them carrying heavy loads on the street of portharcourt.They are hawking bread, they are hawking sachetwater and sweating like lagos.They sleep with empty bellies.They are graduates!

If we were in the good old days, when Corporate bodies would be in the running for young school leavers.If Nigeria was Canada or America, If I was a citizen of Paris, somewhere in France, I would have started preparing for today since January.I would have notified my family and friends since February.I would have got a loan from diamond bank to hire a car that would have conveyed me around on this great day.I would have bought for myself an expensive wine.I would have organized a party, where people would have eaten, and made merry,while I go write my final paper.I would have requested the service of a professional photographer.I would have danced like a prima ballerina.I would have been overtaken by sweet madness for few minutes.I would have bought an overpriced shirt for people to sign on, and, finally, I wouldn't have been writing this, instead, I would be somewhere catching fun!

Well,now that I'm a graduate, I will miss my colleagues and friends.I will miss my lecturers too.I will miss Tobi and Flakes.I will miss Vincent and Henry.I will miss school-life, those nights of tales and cheap talks.I will miss Tolu and Josh.So many people will I miss that I can't mention.Oh God! You've been faithful.Please raise for our Nigeria, selfless leaders, who would make Nigerian education worth the stress.Leaders who would create wealth and not just spend our common goodies.Leaders that would solve the nightmare called unemployment.Leaders that would rather die than watch things go bald.Hmmm..., To all new graduates, Congratulations!

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

Mazi Nnamdi Kanu, Where Are You?

In the latest Nigeria, where young and old need be choosy of what to say, I'm afraid, I can't but ask the omnivorous Lion of Biafra where he is.Kanu, where are you? Are you buried, erased or expired like some people are mongering? Are you somewhere in your Aba Father's house unseen? Are you in Israel or in the United Kingdom, of which you are a citizen? Where on earth are you? I wish you are not already crossing river Jordan to the world beyond.I wish you are not already dining with spirits.I wish you are not dead, if otherwise, another heroe has fallen and Nigeria is already saying adieu to sportsmanship and activism.Has the python defeated the Lion? If the king of the Jungle is still alive, other animals expect at least a light roar!

In my numero uno ABCs to you, before the python started dancing,I opened up on how Nigeria was better as one.I told you how we could reform the country from within.How you were a man whose good looks and confidence I venerated, how you should save Igbos the stress of losing and/or forfeiting their investments to Nigeria and how you should please save me the pains of losing my Igbo friends, neigbours and celebrities to some Biafra.You were either too conditioned to heaps of and several intimates, buddies, fans and converts, who would spend a lifetime singing your mentions and congnomen.I can remember telling you how Biafra(if achieved eventually) would still be governed by wicked Igbo leaders, who like their Yoruba and Hausa colleagues brought Nigeria to her knees.You shouldn't have forgotten that there was hardly any black nation that could be ranked developed. I would rather say, that Africans have the kind of leaders they deserve(more to say about this).If there's any solution to our problems, it is: using our power of votes to unseat a generation that has failed, and, then actively look inwards for youths; who know what governance is about. Africans, and Nigerians especially, hardly take with a straight face pre-election debates. We would rather vote based on well advertised propaganda and unrealistic convictions. We hardly would punch contestants to know what they are capable of doing. We would not consider the intellectual capacities and ingenuity of aspirants, but, vote based on they-said personalities and popularity of political parties. I saw the pre-election debate between American Trump and Clinton and could not but put on ice, how long a way Nigeria had to go.

Mazi, please where are you? Those who lost their sons to protests for your release might now have hysteria.Those who lost their pretty wives to Biafra-Inspired freedom marches are on the lookout.Those who were maimed and crippled in the process of Biafra agitation want to see you. The Children who lost their parents to stray bullets during campaigns for Biafra want to hear how there's still hope. Will election hold in Anambra? Kanu please talk! Are you really a terrorist? Have you committed treason? We who are not in support of secession but admire your selflessness and audacity wants to know if the Lion is already defeated.Oh! it seems the python has taken over. But, what will the future of activism look like in Nigeria? Is the freedom of speech assurance abated? Can we still say things as they are and go scot free? Since the python dances in my country, can we still gambol without awe, scare, phobia and/or suspicion? Hmmm,Life goes on in the east, Igbos are still eating chicken and senegalese rice, cars are still moving and the clock tickles on.In Igboland, people are still getting married in flamboyance and birthdays are still being celebrated with Osadebe's Osondi owendi, even, when Mazi is in not-many-knows-where.Where is the Lion? Where is the prince? Nnamdi Kanu, where are you?

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

Mazi Nnamdi Kanu, Where Are You?

In the latest Nigeria, where young and old need be choosy of what to say, I'm afraid, I can't but ask the omnivorous Lion of Biafra where he is.Kanu, where are you? Are you buried, erased or expired like some people are mongering? Are you somewhere in your Aba Father's house unseen? Are you in Israel or in the United Kingdom, of which you are a citizen? Where on earth are you? I wish you are not already crossing river Jordan to the world beyond.I wish you are not already dining with spirits.I wish you are not dead, if otherwise, another heroe has fallen and Nigeria is already saying adieu to sportsmanship and activism.Has the python defeated the Lion? If the king of the Jungle is still alive, other animals expect at least a light roar!

In my numero uno ABCs to you, before the python started dancing,I opened up on how Nigeria was better as one.I told you how we could reform the country from within.How you were a man whose good looks and confidence I venerated, how you should save Igbos the stress of losing and/or forfeiting their investments to Nigeria and how you should please save me the pains of losing my Igbo friends, neigbours and celebrities to some Biafra.You were either too conditioned to heaps of and several intimates, buddies, fans and converts, who would spend a lifetime singing your mentions and congnomen.I can remember telling you how Biafra(if achieved eventually) would still be governed by wicked Igbo leaders, who like their Yoruba and Hausa colleagues brought Nigeria to her knees.You shouldn't have forgotten that there was hardly any black nation that could be ranked developed. I would rather say, that Africans have the kind of leaders they deserve(more to say about this).If there's any solution to our problems, it is: using our power of votes to unseat a generation that has failed, and, then actively look inwards for youths; who know what governance is about. Africans, and Nigerians especially, hardly take with a straight face pre-election debates. We would rather vote based on well advertised propaganda and unrealistic convictions. We hardly would punch contestants to know what they are capable of doing. We would not consider the intellectual capacities and ingenuity of aspirants, but, vote based on they-said personalities and popularity of political parties. I saw the pre-election debate between American Trump and Clinton and could not but put on ice, how long a way Nigeria had to go.

Mazi, please where are you? Those who lost their sons to protests for your release might now have hysteria.Those who lost their pretty wives to Biafra-Inspired freedom calls are on the lookout.Those who were maimed and crippled in the process of Biafra agitation want to see you. The Children who lost their parents to stray bullets during campaigns for Biafra want to hear how there's still hope. Will election hold in Anambra? Kanu please talk! Are you really a terrorist? Have you committed treason? We who are not in support of secession but admire your selflessness and audacity wants to know if the Lion is already defeated.Oh! it seems the python has taken over. But, what will the future of activism look like in Nigeria? Is the freedom of speech assurance abated? Can we still say things as they are and go scot free? Since the python dances in my country, can we still gambol without awe, scare, phobia and/or suspicion? Hmmm, Life goes on in the east, Igbos are still eating chicken and senegalese rice, cars are still moving and the clock tickles on.In Igboland, people are still getting married in flamboyance and birthdays are still being celebrated with Osadebe's Osondi owendi, even, when Mazi is in not-many-knows-where. Where is the Lion? Where is the prince? Nnamdi Kanu, where are you?

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

Spirits,The Dead And The Living Will Roam The Streets Of Ado In October.

There would be not several and/or thousands of such a day as October 2, 2017 in Nigerian history.On that dawn-to-dark, spirits and dead people would be awake as early as 6:am to make out with mankind.Since Supernatural beings are more cultured and cured than humans, the first thing on that faithful morning is likely row calls. Anthony Enahoro, the father of Nigerian state and first to move the motion for Nigerian Independence in 1953, would suffer a knock(I don't know where it would come from) on his grave. Waking up from a long time siesta, Enahoro would signal Nnamdi Azikiwe, and, Zik, who was himself a prominent member of the then National youth movement (NYC), and first President of Nigeria would swiftly leave his Onitsha tomb and find his way to Ado-Ekiti. In that order, Obafemi Awolowo would answer to his name. Tafawa Balewa and Ahmadu Bello, both victims of the January 15 1966 coup would not be absent. Ken Saro Wiwa, a non-violent agitator and then president of the Movement for the survival of Ogoni people(MOSOP), who was hanged by the military Government in 1995; would also find his way to Ado flanked by the many Ogoni agitators that were murdered in cold blood.Dele Giwa, a renowned press man and activist, who was assassinated with a media bomb on October 19,1986 would also lead a team of blameless journalists and pressmen who were slaughtered in times past for daring to speak up in times of moral decadence,social and Political injustice; would also be present. Funmilayo Ransome Kuti, an activist and Nigerian aristocrat, who stood for women's rights in the 1950s and was later thrown down from a third floor window of Fela's house in the course of the 1978 visit of a thousand soldiers and died as a result, would be seen. Fela Anikulapo Kuti and Gani fawehinmi, a human and civil rights lawyer won't be late on October 2. The innumerable victims of Boko haram genocide would rise and visit Ado.All those children, who died of malnutrition and hunger in the midst of abundance and boom,would find their ways to Ekiti Capital City.The so many Nigerian pensioners, who died of starvation, and bankruptcy, would jet out to Ekiti.The Many Nigerian soldiers who died as a result of being equipped with horse and buggy weapons while the money meant for better ammunition was siphoned, would visit Ado.Nigerian graduates who died as a result of hunger and frustration would also join their living counterparts on October 2.So many accidents were caused by bad roads, and since bad roads are results of Nigerian Leaders' selfishness and insensitivity, Victims of such accidents would also be in Ado Ekiti.The saints and Angels would be present. Blessed Iwene Tansi would be in Ekiti.Joseph Ayodele Babalola would be there and an uncountable multitudes of Angels and spirits in a bid to Identify with Nigerian youths, who would converge in Ekiti for a 100percent violence-free freedom march.Nelson Mandela would be around and Martin Luther king jr,an American civil rights activist; who helped organise the 1963 Washington march before his assassination of April 4, 1968 would not be missing. The about 400 students and civilians killed during a peaceful protest in Tlatelolco in October 2 1968 will visit Ado-Ekiti in solidarity with Nigerian students and the masses who are themselves currently victims of oppression, ache, emptiness, un-employment, thirst, humiliation and bloodbath.

They will help us let know the political class, that their time is up.They will help us tell them we are ready for absolute and honest-to-goodness governance.They will break the news to them, that retirement is around the corner. We can't just continue like this.Something must be done! If we don't rise up we would be trampled on, ride roughshod over, kablooyed, crushed and crunched.The generation before us has failed, so, must give up work and peacefully watch the youths take over leadership, so that we would live and not just exist and our parents enjoy and not just endure life.If Nigerian youths don't struggle for power now, hunger will continue, genocide will not seize, thirst will persevere, Oppression will lengthen and so many ills we enjoy today. The current crop of leaders have done their best, just that it is not enough to take us out of misery and penury. Their time is up and all we need do is tell them we are ready to take-over.We are ready to continue from where they stopped and turn things around.The youths will take over and wipe our parents' tears.We would make life beautiful for the masses and make sure no one goes to bed empty bellied.Those who go about unclad will be clothed, those who sleep outside of shelter will have places to call homes. Children of the poor will make merry and those of the rich will live.The nobodies will become somebodies without knowing anybody. The system of godfatherism will crumble and be squeezed, the new-born will stop crying. War will seize and the drums of terror will be torn. Education will be meaningful and heroes will be celebrated.Literates will work and illiterates will not be good-for-nothing. Employment opportunities will surpass the population and even migrants will come enjoy with us.Governance will be of service and not of luxury and lordship. Students will find fun in schooling and the days of their strength will be memorable. The executive arm will deliver, the hallowed chamber will stop being a tea chop.The Judiciary will embrace justice and life for all will be fair. Civil servants will smile to the banks and business men will stop counting losses. Labourers will be paid beyond their sweat and politicians will stop being demi-gods.Excellence will be rewarded and hard work will be noticed.The health sector will function and hospitals will render best services possible anywhere in the world.Terrorists will see reasons to live and blood baths will stop.Of the many heads in Mogun, those of the guiltless surpass. Non-criminals, who are imprisoned unjustly would have Justice visit them.

So, on October 2 2017, the sun may not rise neither will it set. Rain may not fall neither will clothes be dry.The cloud may not be white, neither will it be blue.There might be no noice nor silence.No merriment nor sadness.There might be no day nor night.No eclipse of the sun nor that of the moon.But the living will join the dead in a freedom march as Ekiti youths will declare Tosin Ajibare, their sole candidate in the 2018 governorship election.Spirits will be lead by angels and saints, Martin Luther King Jr, Awolowo, Zik and those activists we never heard of. Tosin himself will lead the living, flanked by prince Adeyemi, Ojuoluwa Olanrewaju, Alhaji Olowoyo, so many advocates of a better Ekiti and my humble self.It was in October 2 that Theophilus succeeded his father Michael II as Byzantine emperor .It was in October 2 that the Texas revolution began with the battle of Gonzales. It was in october 2 that Guinea declared her independence from France. Do you know, that October 2 is the International day of non-violence adopted by the United Nations in 2007? And above all, St Josemaria Escriva of Opus Dei, saw a vision of "the work of God"in October 2, 1928 and in 2017; it is, without doubt, the work Of God that Youths will declare their independence from ignorance and political irrelevance.It is going to be a day in history. May God Almighty keep us.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

University Lecturers And The Gifts Of Many Virgins.

The University is really a place to be. The episode of being a fresher, now free from Daddy's vigilance and policing, is refreshing.It is there that beauty gets revealed and spied. A pretty lady feels a little more appropriate than the queen of Sheba. It is a dwelling of total freedom. A teen can spend hours with her boyfriend without hysteria.In the University, Daddy's girl can now fit on clothes that would present her as the beauty her parents never knew.Social activities here and there.So many parties, you can attend at will.No siesta and prep class bells as it used to be in high school.So many eye-catching guys too, those with heavy bears and those with Afro hairstyles, those in expensive Gucci shoes and the simple but handsome ones in sanders and pants.The fair ones, the light complexioned and the stunning darks. No one cains you, no one shouts at you like your mum would. Undergraduates eat just what they like. For the beautiful and rich, the elegant and tall,the unrepentant extrovert and the complete sanguine, the extremely brilliant and the unionist; a life-time in the four walls is just too up to sniff. But Like my friend once spoofed, 'the University is fun but for Exams.' Exams wouldn't have been as ghastly, if not for the average African parents mandate that: "make sure you come back with a very good grade, first class or at least second class upper."

On the eve of a child's adieu from home, African parents(dads especially) give a command, without considering the child's ability, competence, intelligence, interest, the unkindness of the course of study and so many other necessary considerations; that 'you must come back home with first-class.' That singular charge is too costly for a child(especially a pretty daughter) you claim to love. It is a way of offering your girl as a gift of sexual satisfaction to ever-ready, polla-erect opportunist lecturers.It is that serious! Some very confident and strict Dads would even visit their Children in school on matriculation day.They seize the day's opportunity to meet some of their Children's lecturers and indirectly give-out an innocent doll face. When it is time to leave, such a father would turn to his daughter and declare: "Like I told your lecturer, you must graduate with first class or at least, second class upper. I see no reason you won't be serious.I will give you everything you need.After this semester, I want to see your grades.If it's not encouraging, forget having a father somewhere."

So, two weeks to Exams the girl-undergraduate reads like a jackal.She wants As at all cost.Pretty Vikkie would read and read and read.She goes to tutorials in as far a place as between-heaven-and-earth. She sweats and struggles hard within the leaves of African tough nut to crack curriculum.She burns night candles, goes to night classes without returning.She dances rest for weeks and go to the exam hall sometimes even over-prepared. She sits down some 30minutes to her first paper and her heart pounds. She sees the first question and faints. After a series of medical massages, she regains consciousness, writes the paper anyway,and, at the end of the semester returns home thinking of what the results would look like.She would be the first to resume school and when the results are out, she checks with a BP of 200/180. Seeing Cs and Ds, she runs to lecturers begging and crying for help(Dad must not see this).

Advantage of such situations, many Lecturers take to penetrate innocent ladies.They disvirgin and eat innocent teens very carnivorously with compensation of As and Bs.Your daughter is opening her undefiled Raja on a lecturers' table, for consumption, just to present to you better grades, isn't that tearful? Isn't it dehumanising? Isn't it disgusting? Some of such girls suffer psychological quandary as a by-product. She tries hard to forget the on-table first time, but second semester is imminent and go-getter University Teachers are waiting. It is when such experiences become painfully unavoidable that such girls give in to promiscuity and sexual rascality.They abort several times and end up with cloudy futures. They stop reading and would hardly go to class, since everything would be solved on the table.

Dear African parents(fathers especially), consider your Children's abilities before making it compulsory for them to have all As. Your daughter might just be an average student or her course too rocklike to have all As in. It is not bad to encourage one's child to work hard but rigidity as regards that is obsolete. It doesn't take first class to make it in life, neither does it take second class upper. Stop making your children desperate for As.Stop making life mundane and hard for them. It is no longer happening the way it used to in your Old school days.Stop pushing them to the wall and sacrificing them on the altar of success to Lecturers as intimacy gadgets.Let the no-nonsense Dad be a father and not some adamant, red-eyes bully.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

mhizesther:
U're so right...the world is turning into something else... I don't think the writer here is trying to condemn females...we shouldn't forget the fact that females are naturally brought up with strict training...it has always been like that...Our parents expect us to take charge of the home because they feel we're capable..it's just a pity that girls have lost their sense of responsibility... In a Gathering of about 200 girls, 80% of them would dress as whores exposing every part...I think our exposure to foreign things is also a major factor promoting indecency...when our firms have role models like kim k, Rihanna, nicky minaj Etc...nd even our African celebrities are even worse...May God help us jare

This is beautiful.

And Of Sex! And Of Sex!! And Of Money!!!

I was broken down and consumed, really tired one day and could not but rest my aching head on a well fitted furniture under the faculty of Agricultural sciences student union donated pavilion. In a flash, I slept off. It would have called off a good sleep, but, for the interruption fired up by the discuss of two pretty 100 level ladies(freshers you would say)."I'm better than you," lady A claimed. "Funny, how can you be? You lost your maidenhood to a stranger, someone you didn't even know,remember?" Lady B countered. "See you, you lost yours to your brother,your blood bloke for that matter," Lady A returned. "Oh! The hymen that I cherished," Lady B reacted, smilling. Truth be told, at that point, I could catch the wink no more(you know how interesting sex talks could be). It was a time to think, a time to be sorry and a time to reason. This is the minim, for an average up-to-the-minute African girl, what is it about life? It is simply of sex! And of Sex!! And of money!!!

For a senior high school
girl, the hobby is sex.You think I lied? That your daughter is still unstolen? Sincerely, a 13yrs old girl is informed and un-wrapped. She knows every principle of visiting Disney land.She's already an expert in 'doggy', research might be on in 'the cat' and 'head rush' styles though. At 18, a good-looking African girl is already randomly sampled and can handle more than one man in horizontal jogging. The questions are: Isn't this the same continent where a man would display blood-stained white clothes, just about half a century ago, as a prove that he met his wife a Virgin? Isn't this thesame continent, where some 100yrs ago, a lady would gambol and/or horse around naked and matter-of-fact in untouchable, beyond wildest dreams and out of the question innocence? "In our days as young girls, you must strip yourself of clothes before pounding yam for elders, as they wouldn't want you to contaminate the food with the dirts coming out from your apparels," my grandma told me. Why do African ladies now eat the forbidden fruit so early and would even slaughter a white porn star in contest?

Little wonder, an average University girl would run up to you for satisfaction,If you were really a bed smart. Prostitutes offer promo to bed champions, so that you won't bear the cost more than once as you would be free to explore for as long as you want.Like a generation under a spell,your female close friend would tell you how she prefers Collins' Tuna turpedo to yours and all other fifteen she had crunched. Tell me you've not heard a girl declare, while seeing a Korean movie, how she would love to have sex with Ahn Jae Hyun and/or Kim Soo Hyun at least once and I'll tell you, how up-to-date you are not. An above suspicion Nigerian girl would tell you how having a full night with Kiss Daniel(without any commitment whatsoever) is her dream.It is that serious!

For a modern day girl, the only qualified rival of great orgasm is money.Sugar Daddies here and there.They must slay, they must wear latest clothes and be expensive too, so, someone must cough up.In fact, a girl now sees nothing wrong in telling her fiance about her sugar daddy. To her,having a side chic, who spends on you is as natural as going hungry. Daughters of important people are on the street as call girls and steetwalkers(Olosho) just to get money for that latest Gucci bag and/or i-phone 7. Do you notice how strangely, grooms behave in weddings today? not their fault. The husband-to-be, knows he's a lucky man if his bride had only tasted 10 different clam hammers, so, he has almost nothing to be proud of. Wedding night is nothing to look forward to anylonger.But, If it is this bad today, what will happen tomorrow?

Genuine beauty, for an African damsel, used to be her innocence,purity and excellence.It used to be chastity, integrity and intelligence. In those days, Africa would boast of decent, befitting, decorous, dependable, submissive and first-rate maidens.Some hundred years ago, ladies had reasons to dream of their wedding nights and smile.They would preserve themselves and would not take down their panties at the slightest urge.They believed in themselves and would work hard to make money.They would not make prostitutes and/or whorls of themselves. They would support their husbands and be to their children, role models. How I wish African ladies can re-visit the culture of chastity, the culture of faithfulness and that of angelic innocence.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

And Of Sex! And Of Sex!! And Of Money!!!

I was broken down and consumed, really tired one day and could not but rest my aching head on a well fitted furniture under the faculty of Agricultural sciences student union donated pavilion. In a flash, I slept off. It would have called off a good sleep, but, for the interruption fired up by the discuss of two pretty 100 level ladies(freshers you would say)."I'm better than you," lady A claimed. "Funny, how can you be? You lost your maidenhood to a stranger, someone you didn't even know,remember?" Lady B countered. "See you, you lost yours to your brother,your blood bloke for that matter," Lady A returned. "Oh! The hymen that I cherished," Lady B reacted, smilling. Truth be told, at that point, I could catch the wink no more(you know how interesting sex talks could be). It was a time to think, a time to be sorry and a time to reason. This is the minim, for an average up-to-the-minute African girl, what is it about life? It is simply of sex! And of Sex!! And of money!!!

For a senior high school
girl, the hobby is sex.You think I lied? That your daughter is still unstolen? Sincerely, a 13yrs old girl is informed and un-wrapped. She knows every principle of visiting Disney land.She's already an expert in 'doggy', research might be on in 'the cat' and 'head rush' styles though. At 18, a good-looking African girl is already randomly sampled and can handle more than one man in horizontal jogging. The questions are: Isn't this the same continent where a man would display blood-stained white clothes, just about half a century ago, as a prove that he met his wife a Virgin? Isn't this thesame continent, where some 100yrs ago, a lady would gambol and/or horse around naked and matter-of-fact in untouchable, beyond wildest dreams and out of the question innocence? "In our days as young girls, you must strip yourself of clothes before pounding yam for elders, as they wouldn't want you to contaminate the food with the dirts coming out from your apparels," my grandma told me. Why do African ladies now eat the forbidden fruit so early and would even slaughter a white porn star in contest?

Little wonder, an average University girl would run up to you for satisfaction,If you were really a bed smart. Prostitutes offer promo to bed champions, so that you won't bear the cost more than once as you would be free to explore for as long as you want.Like a generation under a spell,your female close friend would tell you how she prefers Collins' Tuna turpedo to yours and all other fifteen she had crunched. Tell me you've not heard a girl declare, while seeing a Korean movie, how she would love to have sex with Ahn Jae Hyun and/or Kim Soo Hyun at least once and I'll tell you, how up-to-date you are not. An above suspicion Nigerian girl would tell you how having a full night with Kiss Daniel(without any commitment whatsoever) is her dream.It is that serious!

For a modern day girl, the only qualified rival of great orgasm is money.Sugar Daddies here and there.They must slay, they must wear latest clothes and be expensive too, so, someone must cough up.In fact, a girl now sees nothing wrong in telling her fiance about her sugar daddy. To her,having a side chic, who spends on you is as natural as going hungry. Daughters of important people are on the street as call girls and steetwalkers(Olosho) just to get money for that latest Gucci bag and/or i-phone 7. Do you notice how strangely, grooms behave in weddings today? not their fault. The husband-to-be, knows he's a lucky man if his bride had only tasted 10 different clam hammers, so, he has almost nothing to be proud of. Wedding night is nothing to look forward to anylonger.But, If it is this bad today, what will happen tomorrow?

Genuine beauty, for an African damsel, used to be her innocence,purity and excellence.It used to be chastity, integrity and intelligence. In those days, Africa would boast of decent, befitting, decorous, dependable, submissive and first-rate maidens.Some hundred years ago, ladies had reasons to dream of their wedding nights and smile.They would preserve themselves and would not take down their panties at the slightest urge.They believed in themselves and would work hard to make money.They would not make prostitutes and/or whorls of themselves. They would support their husbands and be to their children, role models. How I wish African ladies can re-visit the culture of chastity, the culture of faithfulness and that of angelic innocence.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

And Of Sex! And Of Sex!! And Of Money!!!

I was broken down and consumed, really tired one day and could not but rest my aching head on a well fitted furniture under the faculty of Agricultural sciences student union donated pavilion. In a flash, I slept off. It would have called off a good sleep, but, for the interruption fired up by the discuss of two pretty 100 level ladies(freshers you would say)."I'm better than you," lady A claimed. "Funny, how can you be? You lost your maidenhood to a stranger, someone you didn't even know,remember?" Lady B countered. "See you, you lost yours to your brother,your blood bloke for that matter," Lady A returned. "Oh! The hymen that I cherished," Lady B reacted, smilling. Truth be told, at that point, I could catch the wink no more(you know how interesting sex talks could be). It was a time to think, a time to be sorry and a time to reason. This is the minim, for an average up-to-the-minute African girl, what is it about life? It is simply of sex! And of Sex!! And of money!!!

For a senior high school
girl, the hobby is sex.You think I lied? That your daughter is still unstolen? Sincerely, a 13yrs old girl is informed and un-wrapped. She knows every principle of visiting Disney land.She's already an expert in 'doggy', research might be on in 'the cat' and 'head rush' styles though. At 18, a good-looking African girl is already randomly sampled and can handle more than one man in horizontal jogging. The questions are: Isn't this the same continent where a man would display blood-stained white clothes, just about half a century ago, as a prove that he met his wife a Virgin? Isn't this thesame continent, where some 100yrs ago, a lady would gambol and/or horse around naked and matter-of-fact in untouchable, beyond wildest dreams and out of the question innocence? "In our days as young girls, you must strip yourself of clothes before pounding yam for elders, as they wouldn't want you to contaminate the food with the dirts coming out from your apparels," my grandma told me. Why do African ladies now eat the forbidden fruit so early and would even slaughter a white porn star in contest?

Little wonder, an average University girl would run up to you for satisfaction,If you were really a bed smart. Prostitutes offer promo to bed champions, so that you won't bear the cost more than once as you would be free to explore for as long as you want.Like a generation under a spell,your female close friend would tell you how she prefers Collins' Tuna turpedo to yours and all other fifteen she had crunched. Tell me you've not heard a girl declare, while seeing a Korean movie, how she would love to have sex with Ahn Jae Hyun and/or Kim Soo Hyun at least once and I'll tell you, how up-to-date you are not. An above suspicion Nigerian girl would tell you how having a full night with Kiss Daniel(without any commitment whatsoever) is her dream.It is that serious!

For a modern day girl, the only qualified rival of great orgasm is money.Sugar Daddies here and there.They must slay, they must wear latest clothes and be expensive too, so, someone must cough up.In fact, a girl now sees nothing wrong in telling her fiance about her sugar daddy. To her,having a side chic, who spends on you is as natural as going hungry. Daughters of important people are on the street as call girls and steetwalkers(Olosho) just to get money for that latest Gucci bag and/or i-phone 7. Do you notice how strangely, grooms behave in weddings today? not their fault. The husband-to-be, knows he's a lucky man if his bride had only tasted 10 different clam hammers, so, he has almost nothing to be proud of. Wedding night is nothing to look forward to anylonger.But, If it is this bad today, what will happen tomorrow?

Genuine beauty, for an African damsel, used to be her innocence,purity and excellence.It used to be chastity, integrity and intelligence. In those days, Africa would boast of decent, befitting, decorous, dependable, submissive and first-rate maidens.Some hundred years ago, ladies had reasons to dream of their wedding nights and smile.They would preserve themselves and would not take down their panties at the slightest urge.They believed in themselves and would work hard to make money.They would not make prostitutes and/or whorls of themselves. They would support their husbands and be to their children, role models. How I wish African ladies can re-visit the culture of chastity, the culture of faithfulness and that of angelic innocence.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

Masturbation is considered a sin in the Catholic Church. So, no priest should do it. Not even members.

If You See Olosho, Marry Her! She'll Almost Make A Better Wife.

Not many Nigerians drop in customary courts. In today's Nigeria of emptiness, thirst and lack, you are only depriving yourself of 24-carat relaxation, if you are not a signatory to the painful comedies that sneak out from such courts. I've not been there though; the stories that escape those enclosures bring about genuine laughter meant only for trying times like this. "I know of four men that my wife has slept with," "I'm no longer interested, I caught her stuffing the turkey with my gateman," "oh! I caught this woman with my younger brother, sinking the sausage in my own bed," "dissolve us please, she still has sex with her ex, after five years of marriage," "my mechanic has been sleeping with my wife," and so on, are the likes of things couples discuss with the president/Judge. Who will get married to an innocent looking girl? You? Well.

An average man prefers a young,pretty, innocent looking and well structured doll face for a wife. In fact, old men who want to re-marry even prefer such ladies. Mere seeing their faces, you can't but trust such butterflies. Before they tell you 'yes,' you are already planning marriage with them. When they smile at you, you would definitely will half of your real estate to them. Twenty four hours into your relationship, you can beat your chest that she's all yours and loves you without reservation. She can't have a side chic, not her type does that. Mere looking at her lips, you want to get married tomorrow. Woah! She's just too soft. When some meet such girls, they even pooh-pooh and brush off their friends.She's enough for a companion. She's caring, loving, gentle, intelligent and fun to be with, so, what else? Death! Oh sorry, next paragrah!

Have you ever imagined why some men just die of heart attack? One of the most stinging and sensitive feelings is that of when a girl you live for, cheats on you without a single sign of remorse. If there's one attribute of innocent looking ladies not many care to know, it is that they are also blunt. They are intelligent enough to give you reasons they slept with your driver and/or friend. "Because you do go to work in the morning and come back in the evening. I always feel lonely, what do you expect me to do?" If you are not satisfied with that beautiful response, then she'll continue, "Maybe we should break up.I had no option then, you should try to understand." That's when a lover boy/man would collapse only to wake up in the hospital.

Someone told me the story of a guy who went to pay his friend a visit, on getting there, he met his friend and they gisted. The friend he was visiting told him how hes been on the job with a pretty girl.They must have both laughed as the friend even showed his visitor some of the girls' undies. It was not funny when the girl showed up from the bathroom and alas! She was the visitors' girlfriend.What a dark day for a serious lover! This is the minim: Is it not better to date Olosho (a sex worker), so that at least you are sure of something? You are sure your babe is with some guy now getting herself screwed. Even, getting married to Olosho seems better as you would also be sure your wife is with some other man rendering sexual service when you are out for work. In fact, if you get home before her, you can easily put a call through to her and ask her to give the phone to the man she's sleeping with. That done, you would just request that the man releases your wife with a promise that you would relief her very early the next day, so that she would continue with the chemistry. Oh shit! What have I been saying? Who will marry Olosho?

How I wish innocent looking ladies are really above suspicion.If Only Saint-like girls are really trustworthy.That, no girl is truly angelic? No! Well, I will get married to a pretty and innocent looking lady who is decent too.Just that I won't place all my trust in her, but in God, who is the only one that can't disappoint.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

If You See Olosho, Marry Her! She'll Almost Make A Better Wife.

Not many Nigerians drop in customary courts. In today's Nigeria of emptiness, thirst and lack, you are only depriving yourself of 24-carat relaxation, if you are not a signatory to the painful comedies that sneak out from such courts. I've not been there though; the stories that escape those enclosures bring about genuine laughter meant only for trying times like this. "I know of four men that my wife has slept with," "I'm no longer interested, I caught her stuffing the turkey with my gateman," "oh! I caught this woman with my younger brother, sinking the sausage in my own bed," "dissolve us please, she still has sex with her ex, after five years of marriage," "my mechanic has been sleeping with my wife," and so on, are the likes of things couples discuss with the president/Judge. Who will get married to an innocent looking girl? You? Well.

An average man prefers a young,pretty, innocent looking and well structured doll face for a wife. In fact, old men who want to re-marry even prefer such ladies. Mere seeing their faces, you can't but trust such butterflies. Before they tell you 'yes,' you are already planning marriage with them. When they smile at you, you would definitely will half of your real estate to them. Twenty four hours into your relationship, you can beat your chest that she's all yours and loves you without reservation. She can't have a side chic, not her type does that. Mere looking at her lips, you want to get married tomorrow. Woah! She's just too soft. When some meet such girls, they even pooh-pooh and brush off their friends.She's enough for a companion. She's caring, loving, gentle, intelligent and fun to be with, so, what else? Death! Oh sorry, next paragrah!

Have you ever imagined why some men just die of heart attack? One of the most stinging and sensitive feelings is that of when a girl you live for, cheats on you without a single sign of remorse. If there's one attribute of innocent looking ladies not many care to know, it is that they are also blunt. They are intelligent enough to give you reasons they slept with your driver and/or friend. "Because you do go to work in the morning and come back in the evening. I always feel lonely, what do you expect me to do?" If you are not satisfied with that beautiful response, then she'll continue, "Maybe we should break up.I had no option then, you should try to understand." That's when a lover boy/man would collapse only to wake up in the hospital.

Someone told me the story of a guy who went to pay his friend a visit, on getting there, he met his friend and they gisted. The friend he was visiting told him how hes been on the job with a pretty girl.They must have both laughed as the friend even showed his visitor some of the girls' undies. It was not funny when the girl showed up from the bathroom and alas! She was the visitors' girlfriend.What a dark day for a serious lover! This is the minim: Is it not better to date Olosho (a sex worker), so that at least you are sure of something? You are sure your babe is with some guy now getting herself screwed. Even, getting married to Olosho seems better as you would also be sure your wife is with some other man rendering sexual service when you are out for work. In fact, if you get home before her, you can easily put a call through to her and ask her to give the phone to the man she's sleeping with. That done, you would just request that the man releases your wife with a promise that you would relief her very early the next day, so that she would continue with the chemistry. Oh shit! What have I been saying? Who will marry Olosho?

How I wish innocent looking ladies are really above suspicion.If Only Saint-like girls are really trustworthy.That, no girl is truly angelic? No! Well, I will get married to a pretty and innocent looking lady who is decent too.Just that I won't place all my trust in her, but in God, who is the only one that can't disappoint.

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

IamaNigerianGuy:
In the initial shared post, the OP was going on about how women should walk the field as much as they liked because men would not appreciate their sacrifice. Wasn't that the gist of the message ? Well I say they should do as they like and leave men out of it .

U've just murdered the initial Post. It is nothing related to what you just discussed. D idea is: African Moms Are Excessive Disciplinarians And Should Soften Their Outputs. They Should Be More Attentive To Their Daughters And Shouldn't Shy Away From Discussing Sex With Them. They Should Learn That To Err Is Human And Learn To Forgive Their Daughters If Found To Have Screwed. They Should Also Learn That Falling In Love Is Beautiful And/Or Necessary. They Should Guide Their Daughters And Not Judge And Condemn Their Sexual Inclinations.