₦airaland Forum

I am of mixed race and I definitely prefer dark skinned me ....someone like Djimon Hounsou. He is just so handsome...

There is absolutely nothing wrong with "crushing" on someone. I am not in a relationship now but honestly I am still crushing on my ex..He's so damn sexy and I can't wait for him to visit in August..

moving right along......it is totally normal. With my ex I wouldn't tell him b/c of his jealousy but for many people they would . It depends on the personality
type of who you are dating.

Mynd_44: Okay fine sorry. Are you okay now?

Lol..hmmmm...yes..I am.

Mynd_44: First you said you had a partner who did not reply your calls just like the OP and now you say you are separated? Please arrange yourself jorh

No need for me to arrange myself b/c its obvious you have lost the forum somewhere. Retrace your steps.If you would take out the time to read my previous post. It stated that because of the distance and miscommunication I was leaving him and no longer wanted to be with him because of it. I finally spoke to last night

FIN!

12 inches!:
Thx for the comment. But my question for u is "What of if a girl breaks up with the guy" then does ur inference still hold true. Again, she doesn't come here so I'm sure we're safe plus no names mentioned. Thirdly, I did think abt it...and I thot I could handle it until everything rily dawned on me. And finally I didn't break her heart on purpose... I just did wat I felt was best and maybe it's true I need sme growin up to do but what has happened as happened I cnt change it.

Throughout life we won't always make the best decisions concerning others but sometimes it is definitely okay to be selfish and think of yourself sometimes.
If you don't there is a chance you can go throughout life living for other people only and who wants that misery.

Mynd_44: see this demented ar-se wipe? My response was to the OP you f00l. Are you that angry that you have being denied Visa so many times that you are suddenly believing your own lies that your BF is outta the country?

Oh, how I am so amused with your childish antics.

#1-I don't need a visa. Do you want to know why? I currently reside in the (American citizen)U.S. living in a lovely house..with a lovely car and a lovely family. Yes, I am blessed.
Maybe, you're the one whose having issues obtaining a Visa.

Secondly, did you not get the memo? I guess not- he's in the Caribbeans. I am happy to say we're no longer a couple but will remain friends. This, I am content with.

Stop the ignorance and stand for something..

Stay Blessed!

I have never experience this before but I do know how it feels to be in a insecure relationship but I refuse
to believe he left her because of trust issues. Continuing to tell her it was "trust issues" was a cop out to leave her.

After 3-4 years he should be asking her hand in marriage. I feel men know within the first year if his girlfriend is an option
for marriage. Maybe he just no longer wanted the relationship and didn't know how to tell her so he is definitely considered a coward at this point.

Getting over him will definitely be hard but with patience and time she will eventually get over him. There is really no way to console her outside of
being supportive and being there for her. She will have to go through similar stages of losing a loved one b/c that's what has happened. She has lost her Fiance
and she is trying to cope. My heart goes out to because I can relate how it feels. The first couple of weeks will be difficult but with support from
friends and loved ones she will get over him. Just be her friend and be there for her.

I wish her nothing but the best and I will pray for her.

khukhi: I know exactly what u mean. I once dated a man who had a 4 year old and seeing that child drove me nuts especially because he was the spitting image of his annoying mother. After that I knew how hard it'd be for me to be a step mom!

I never dated anyone with kids and honestly I don't think I can.

Mynd_44: What the eff is this rejected anonymous? This is the reason guys take you for granted, you are so darned dumb and insecure. Call him up and ask him why. If he ain't picking go to his house and knock on his front door. Why kill yourself at home over such trivial matters?

I think it is hilarious that you would even respond. Who ever said anything about killing oneself. Are you serious? If you would have actually
read my response you would noticed he is not even the same country as I am. The response is the very reason why you're miserable.

"drops mic..exit stage"

12 inches!:
I lost it when I saw her son and I realized I wasn't ready for that now...Maybe I overreacted sha....Or I was just scared. But then the breaking up wasn't easy. I don't want to waste her time.

Break-ups are never good but at least you made her aware of your thoughts and feelings. That's always a start.

i wish you the best.

Sometimes it is so easier to confuse jealousy of someone with love. Because men are territorial and at times possessive doesn't mean he loves you.

There are times you may doubt the love someone have for you but if you're going to be in a relationship you must feel it deep

down in your and soul. You should never have to doubt a person's love for you. It is definitely not worth it.

12 inches!:
I av been dating her for a little ova a month. It seems so short but it seems like we dated for over a year. We had fun. We enjoyed it. We went out to parks. We ate together. She came to my house a lot. No sex by the way. But then she has a kid (she told me early enuff). I couldn't handle it though I had been trying to. So wen I eventually went to her house I lost it. So we broke up on the fone and I cried a lot that nite. I saw her today and we talked abt it. We smiled. We laffed. I cried. It was my last moment with her and I wanted to make the best of it so I kissed her finally and I had to let her go. Things were complicated enuff alredi. She said she is happy we dated. I'm thankful I met her too. She has changed my perspective abt girls. ***** I miss u. Thanks for making me happy. I wish u a good man and a great future. God bless you.

I understand love won't solve every issue but why not try to make it work? Why did you lose it when you went to her house? You need
to elaborate on that one. You know many people can't date women with kids. Although, you love and miss her you must do what is best for you.

I wish you all the best.

bknight: I jst tire



You missed same thing I missed




Temper downlow girlfriend! Ppl analyze situations from d fact they r fed. But when u tangle ur story up with irrelevant adjective, it comes across as meaningless.
For instance, how does 'he is handsome' fit in or have any reasonable effect in dis story?

Honestly, it has absolutely nothing to do with this story. I have always thought he was handsome and wanted to use "handsome" to describe him just as I use to describe myself as an "American female"...it was just another way to point out he was a guy and not a female.

Enjoy your day.

*Ileke-IdI:
What exactly do you want us to do?

It's not about him being Nigerian. If you contact a guy and he doesn't reply, he simply isn't interested. Trust me.
It aint about his nationality or his race, he's just an uninterested man.

But thanks for the advice you did share. I have washed my hands with it.

He's also a guy when he's upset it gives the "silent treatment"..I am too confident of a woman for that.

He has been the one chasing me for years on edge. I wish him the best....

*Ileke-IdI:
What exactly do you want us to do?

It's not about him being Nigerian. If you contact a guy and he doesn't reply, he simply isn't interested. Trust me.
It aint about his nationality or his race, he's just an uninterested man.

I never asked you to do anything. Just give advice. That simple. Who ever said anything about it being
because he was Nigerian. I only mentioned he was handsome. Who ever said it was about his nationality or race.

How did we ever get there? Wowzers!

Why do people over analyze ?

Mrs.Chima:
I see why he doesn't want to talk to you.

Maybe you just lost me somewhere...

MsDarkSkin: Not necessarily.

If he is playing games, cut it off.

*the relationship of course!

I am not sure if he's playing games but If so..I have chosen to let him play alone.

Mrs.Chima:
Exactly what I said. You need to buy a vowel?

ha ha..NOT..

FIN!

tpia@:
why do people always come here to let us know they're dating or met a nigerian man?

am i missing something?

Everyday you don't find a Nigerian discussion forum offering threads in entertainment, technology and romance categories.

Mrs.Chima:
Don't you hate that shit? I mean What does his ethnicity have to do with his character?!!!

A simple question about how to deal with an online relationship?

His ethnicity has nothing to do with character..You've lost me here...

What are you talking about?

CyberG: ^ So easily? Well, I don't know both sides or all of the story but if a lady gives up so easily on a guy, it's doubtful she really loved him to start with. Just an opinion though.

Hi Cyber!

I met this handsome Nigerian guy in Undergrad and from there...chemistry between us lived on but we didn't date. I have been knowing him for about 7 years. Our college and careers have kept us at a distance but we kept in touch via phone and email. He is currently in Medical School and contacted me in March and suggested we date since we have been back and forth. It has always been something between us.

Everything has been going great between us. Just last week he asked me "where did I see us in 2 years". I felt that was a pretty serious question.
He has been asking me since March to visit him. I had to reschedule my trip from the week of May 18th to June 22nd. He wasn't happy about this.
We went the entire of part of last week not talking until I received an email that read "I have been doing a lot of thinking and I think we're moving too fast. Cancel your ticket and I will see you when I visit in August. Every since he has sent that email that shocked me..he hasn't responded to my email, phone calls or text messages. He is known to not communicate when he is upset. I don't give up easy and majority of the time I fight for everything I want.

In this case I have been fighting since Thursday. He hasn't given me a reason why he is acting the way he is acting. I have no idea when he will call. It is very disappointing. I know he will call but the question is.."when?". After making failed attempts to reach out to him..I am watching my ass with him. FIN!

bknight: Topic "Need advice: dating a 'handsome' nigerian"

What are you saying? It is over with him!

kuphid: I love dis...so on point

Thanks love..I try!

fav1: yea sure. gime urs and we'l kick it off from der.
*wink*

Hi Fav..my Skype ID is magenta.polish.

Search for me and I hope to hear from you.

omega25red: the girl who broke his heart in the town he lives in took him back so now he is not talking to you anymore.
or could be that medical school just got a bit more complicated and he has no time for you
or he went to jail which is why he is not responding to any form of communications
or he died (extreme i know but hey you never know)


are you friends on FB maybe you can see if he has any recent activity

He doesn't have FB therefore we aren't friends. Maybe he is dating someone but I do know he has only been for a couple of months.
Maybe it's medical school because he has mentioned it is demanding and stressful. I know when he's upset it gives the "silent treatment".

He doesn't do much talking when he is upset which has been an issue with us. I have been knowing this guy for over 9 years so for him just drop
off its mind boggling.

Thanks for your advice.

the girl who broke his heart in the town he lives in took him back so now he is not talking to you anymore.
or could be that medical school just got a bit more complicated and he has no time for you
or he went to jail which is why he is not responding to any form of communications
or he died (extreme i know but hey you never know)


are you friends on FB maybe you can see if he has any recent activity

He doesn't have FB therefore we aren't friends. Maybe he is dating someone but I do know he has only been for a couple of months.
Maybe it's medical school because he has mentioned it is demanding and stressful. I know when he's upset it gives the "silent treatment".

He doesn't do much talking when he is upset which has been an issue with us. I have been knowing this guy for over 9 years so for him just drop
off its mind boggling.

Thanks for your advice.

Everyone- thank you for all your advice. I just have decided to no longer talk to him although I know he will be calling
and or texting to discuss his sudden absence.

Happy Monday!

Hey ! Inbox me bc I would like to talk to you. I am going through a similar situation. My bf and I have been dating a couple
of months. He emailed me and said he wants to slow things down but I'm confused bc he has been the one pressuring me about commitment.
I was suppose to travel to visit him but he now wants me to cancel my ticket and wait until he sees me in Aug. Remind you
he sent an email. I tried calling and texting and he has not responded. It angers and hurt but I have made the decision to move on. He's
a fucking coward and I'm disgusted . I thought he was better than this but he isn't. I know
one day he's going to call and I'm just gone sit in silence to listen to his dumb ass explaination bc I know it will be BS.

I love forward to talking to you.

A

Hello ,

I am American female dating a Nigerian attending medical school. We have
Been knowing each other for awhile now . We recently have gotten back
in touch and decided to start dating 2mo ago. He has been asking me to come see
him but I have decided to wait until the end of next month bc were in a long distant
relationship . I really like him and he has feelings for me. We'll I recieved
an email telling me we are moving to fast and asking me to cancel my ticket
and he will see me when he comes to visit in Augusta. #1- I'm upset he sent an
email and #2- he isn't responding to any of my texts or emails.

I have decided to stop all communication and leave it alone but I never
expected for him to end it the way he has.

What does this mean? Any advice ?

fav1: God bless u Amanda.... dats d best advice i ad so far with reasons.
thank u Love.

Fav1-I am happy to provide you with advise that I hope will help you start
your journey to mending your heart, mind and soul.

Do you have a skype ID? We can continue to chit chat there. How are you doing today?

How was your weekend? Is everything okay?

Amanda

I am suppose to be visiting my ex bf whom is Nigerian. He is medical school in the Caribbeans. There is a huge communication between us
so I broke up with him. I have tried to remain friends with him but it seems as if he has distant himself. Can someone advise
how do you communicate with someone that doesn't seem as if they want to communicate.

I have been knowing him for over 8 yrs and we have always been friends. We dated for over a month yet it didn't work out
because of his communication. I am not sure if his way of communication points back to his culture. I am an African American
woman in the states. Because of his behavior I would email him on why the distant and he wouldn't respond.

If I discuss anything to do with coming to visit him... he responds. We have never experienced such issues as friends.

He communicates well when the conversation is based on me visiting him but very silent when it comes to discussing his distance
and sudden change in behavior. I text him..no response..I email him ..no response...I skype him..no response..but if its concerning
my trip to see him next month..he responds.

I have decided to cancel my ticket. I will inform him of this today. I am so lost as to the meaning of his behavior.
He acts as if he's upset b/c I broke up with him but he's not communicating. How can you date or have any relationship with another individual
if you can't talk about issues that are close to the heart.

I can be reached on skype if you want to talk further... magenta.polish

Your help would be greatly appreciated.

It is disappointing that you are going through such turmoil. She is a grown woman so she need take on her own independence and stop taking

advantage of you. I predict it will only get worse when you're married. I am sure there are many guys she can find to do the same but

believe me it will only last momentarily. If she truly loves you she will understand. She is selfish and ungrateful so I will give her space.

You have convinced her that it is all about her. Sometimes woman use their beauty to get what they want . You're making the right choice

by keeping your money. I live in the states. I work full time and attend college for Computer Science & Art full time as well.

It is definitely nice to be spoiled but I spoil my own self as well. There is nothing like making your own money and spending it.

No ones money spends like your own. I wish you all the best.

--Mannie

P.S. Much love From The States (ATLANTA)