₦airaland Forum

10 kinds of people you will meet in a danfo bus

https://www.nairaland.com/1904093/10-kind-people-meet-danfo

AfricanApple: clean that dirty wey dey ur mouth

u sabi lie eh, no be u my gate man say he see for inside danfo yesterday? na im make me say I know d onecwey u belong

lol not me neva will i enta danfo

AfricanApple: op u try sha o, very funny especially the preacher and the pervert

but wait o, which do u belong to, I know

i no dey enta danfo now

[img]http://cathyeroms.files./2012/01/danfo-bus.jpg[/img]

1. The co-driver: In a Danfo bus, you’ll normally find a driver, bus conductor and other passengers. Among these other passengers is a co-driver i.e. a self acclaimed one. You’ll often hear him from the back seats giving orders to the driver on where to follow, how to step on the brake, how to swerve onto a new lane etc. And the driver most often respond: “Na you dey drive?” Or “You wan collect steering for my hand?”

2. Red Alert: Imagine yourself inside a danfo bus and the driver is running on what seems like a top speed. Then all of a sudden you hear a voice break into your chain of thoughts. More like a scream: “Ahn ahn, driver you wan kill us?” Or “Driver please take it easy o. I never marry.” Sometimes the co-driver doubles as a “red alert”. Other times another passenger plays that role. The main goal is to caution the driver so that we can all arrive safely.

3. Preacher man: Repent for the Kingdom of God is at hand. With the preacherman in your bus, you can barely hear yourself think. Forget about receiving calls in that bus. If you do, you will hear the person on the other line asking, “are you in church?”. The good thing about a preacherman in your danfo bus is that you get reminded that heaven and hell is real. “If we all die now, where will you go? Heaven or hell?” Some passengers stare at him in anger. Why should you say if we all die now? Yes, of course we want to make Heaven. No we won’t die in this danfo bus.

4. The pervert: One day I was in a danfo bus and I heard a woman say in a loud voice “if you try that again I will slap you.” She was referring to the young man sitting beside her. The story was that the man was rubbing his elbow against her bosom. You can’t really tell who is rubbing what because some of these buses are usually so jam-packed. The best thing is to position yourself well. But if you are unlucky you might fall victim of false accusation, this time a reversed psychology- one day, an older man pissed at the way a woman was protecting her frontage bluntly asked, “who wan touch your bosom?” According to him, he has more than that at home. Silence.

5. “Do you know who I am”: This man or woman tells us in a danfo bus that he or she is a very important person so the bus conductor must not argue with him/her over N10 change. Enough said.

6. Political analyst: If you missed the news last night, and you have a political analyst riding the same danfo bus with you, may God bless your day. All is cool until he gets another politically conscious passenger to engage in the discourse. Sometimes their analysis is a comic relief. Other times depressing. Depending on the topic in focus. An elderly analyst tells the younger folks in the bus about the good old days. And the danger of having a “young” inexperienced president rule Nigeria.

7. GSM users: Sometimes, you enter a bus and everyone, well almost everyone, is on their mobile phone making calls. The one screaming at the top of his voice…

8. Sleep-attack: How do people sleep through the journey? In the danfo bus? On the bumpy Lagos road? Forget it. You don’t know what their story is about. Body no be wood o.

9. Networker: The guy tells you that you have beautiful brown eyes and soberly shares his story. What is yours? Blank stare.

10. Tribalism: If war breaks out in Lagos, it might start from a danfo bus. One minute you enter a danfo bus and you see us all sandwiched in the air-tight yellow buses and you sigh in relief. The next, you hear an argument from the back row and the next thing, someone is yelling, throwing verbal punches at a particular tribe.

make i come siddon here dey look

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link to match preview https://www.nairaland.com/1892142/barclays-premier-league-arsenal-fc

Preview updated... what a cool selection from both teams

South African Ebola Patient Arrested At Lagos International Airport

link in my signature

wip7: Why do you pay the amount you stated above? I am afraid your confirmation letter may not be prepared since you pay less than required amount.

exactly!!!

dedicate this fp to ijebabe to unban me

heard it burns calories also

4 days more to go...

tshegs19: .

i sight u, u run keep space abi.

really

lol... dz funny

https://www.football-king.com/images/articles/arsenal_vs_city.jpg

The fixture was arranged to be played at Emirates Stadium on Saturday 13 September 2014 at 15:00. Due to live broadcasting on BT Sport, it has been moved to a new scheduled date Saturday 13 September 2014 at 12:45.

Pablo Zabaleta has warned Arsenal not to read too much into their win over Manchester City last month as they prepare to lock horns again.
Arsene Wenger's side beat the Barclays Premier League champions 3-0 in the Community Shield at Wembley courtesy of goals from Santi Cazorla, Aaron Ramsey and Olivier Giroud. City return to London to face Arsenal in a mouth-watering Barclays Premier League encounter on Saturday and Manuel Pellegrini's men will still be licking their wounds after suffering a shock 1-0 home defeat to Stoke City last time.
Zabaleta is expected to recover from a knock sustained in Argentina's friendly victory over world champions Germany last week to take his place in the City side and the defender expects Pellegrini's team to give a better account of themselves in the capital this time around.
"It [the Community Shield defeat] was the first game of the campaign and the squad were not all back from the summer or 100 per cent fit," the full-back told City's website. "We are much stronger than we were a month ago and we will continue to improve and get back into our stride as each game goes by.

"That said, Arsenal are a very good team and it is always a hard game at the Emirates. They have improved their squad and brought in some great players to strengthen their title bid but we are looking to bounce back after the Stoke defeat and we will go there to win three points."
Zabaleta is wary of the threat posed by Arsenal's big-money signing Alexis Sanchez. The right-back believes the Chile forward will prove to be a shrewd acquisition.

"Sanchez is a very quick, sharp player who can play wide or as a striker but I feel he is most dangerous when he is on the flanks," he said. "He did very well at Barcelona and he is a difficult player to face because you know you are in for a tough afternoon when you face him.
"He is also works very hard for the team, especially when they don't have the ball and he has become a very important player for Chile so he is a great signing for Arsenal."

Wenger could hand a debut to deadline-day signing Danny Welbeck following his move from Manchester United. The forward scored both goals in England's 2-0 Euro 2016 qualifying win against Switzerland on Monday and has been given the chance to kick-start his career at Arsenal.
Arsenal were held to a 1-1 draw at Leicester City in their last league match, but Wenger views Saturday's encounter as a chance to demonstrate the progress that the FA Cup holders have made.

"Saturday is a good opportunity to show we have grown as a team and we are ready for the fight," said the Frenchman.
Ramsey's fitness will be assessed after the midfielder picked up an ankle injury in Wales' victory in Andorra on Tuesday, while Kieran Gibbs (hamstring), Mikel Arteta (ankle) and Mesut Ozil (knock) have all been passed fit.

City have a concern over striker Stevan Jovetic (hamstring) and will be hoping Fernando (groin) is available after he was injured against Stoke.
Arsenal have not beaten City in the last four Barclays Premier League meetings between the two sides and were beaten 6-3 at the Etihad Stadium last season.

Arsenal (from): Martinez, Ospina, Szczesny, Chambers, Debuchy, Gibbs, Koscielny, Mertesacker, Monreal, Arteta, Cazorla, Coquelin, Diaby, Flamini, Oxlade-Chamberlain, Ozil, Ramsey, Rosicky, Wilshere, Alexis, Campbell, Podolski, Sanogo, Welbeck.

Manchester City (from): Caballero, Hart, Wright, Boyata, Clichy, Demichelis, Kolarov, Kompany, Mangala, Nastasic, Sagna, Zabaleta, Fernandinho, Fernando, Lampard, Milner, Nasri, Navas, Silva, Sinclair, Toure, Aguero, Dzeko, Jovetic

Match Appointments

Referee: Mark Clattenburg Assistants: S Beck, J Collin Fourth Official: J Moss

nice pix

[img]http://1.bp..com/-7K01X3eXtL4/VAiPKbJyt7I/AAAAAAADesI/36R5ofmzbGY/s1600/000.jpg[/img]

The Agbor kingdom in Delta state is currently in a state of confusion after their 37 year old King, the Dein of Agbor, Benjamin Ikechukwu Kiagborekuzi I, secretly married a white woman, a decision said to be unacceptable by his people who expected him to marry an Agbor woman.

The Dein who was crowned King when he was just two and a half years old in 1979 following the death of his father, had all his education abroad. He returned to Nigeria in 2001 after completing all his studies to assume the throne as king and has been ruling his kingdom since without a Queen.
Looks like he found love while he was abroad and decided to settle down with her. Continue...

A highly respected palace Chief, Alika (surname withheld) told Leadership newspapers that the ruling palace council had insisted that he gets married to a Nigerian woman from Agbor kingdom according to the tradition but appears their king called their bluff and married the white woman, a decision seen as a taboo.

SOURCE

he look like shekau

baddo rocks!!!

dapsoneh: How does ds place luk like London na

what is ur proof that it is not London