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Family › Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Aname: 3:09am On Feb 22, 2020

Your father might have a point because

1) He knows the history of your village better. If it is indeed true that she could be a relative, can you carry this burden for the rest of your life? You're just 25 now.

2) She is asking you to take a blood oath. My brother. The signs are already there. Maybe your father even knows her lineage but wants to keep the truth from you and is only letting you in on a small part of it, because maybe you are not ready to hear the full truth.

Please don't base your marriage on this thing we call love. It is deceptive.

I'm not saying that this will not work, but the key to this is true and earnest prayer.

Good luck.

2 Likes

Romance › Re: Is It Right To Date My Employee? by Aname: 2:16pm On Feb 15, 2020

Davash222:
You just opened a ‘mini shop’ and the first and only thing you’re thinking is how to date your sales girl.
You’re not even thinking how to make your shop ‘super shop’ considering its still at the ‘mini’ stage.
Your ‘mini shop’ would be reduced to ‘nothing shop’ the moment you start any nonsense relationship with that girl. the only relationship you should keep with her is ‘Employer-Employee’ relationship, at least for now.
When your shop gets to the stage you so wish, then you can tell the girl about your intentions. That would give you enough time to know the girl truly, if she’s your type of woman.

Hahah...that ship has sailed long ago. At this point, OP is not looking for a "go" or "no-go" response. He is looking for a "go because..." response.

My advise to you: start looking for a new sales girl quickly because you have already lost this one whether you "go" or you "no-go"...

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Culture › Re: My Fiance Parents Are Against Our Marriage. Please I Need Advice by Aname: 8:04pm On Feb 14, 2020

It's not a pleasant situation to be in, and to be honest it can go either way: if you successfully integrate into his family and speak the language and all, you will be accepted and loved even beyond your husband.

On the other hand, they may just never like you and accept you.

Best advise is to take it to God. If it's real, it will stand the test of cultures and families.

All the best

Celebrities › Re: Toke Makinwa Shares Valentine's Day Photo, Advises Those Who Are Alone Today by Aname: 7:44pm On Feb 14, 2020

[quote author=Aname post=86654230][/quote] grin

Celebrities › Re: Toke Makinwa Shares Valentine's Day Photo, Advises Those Who Are Alone Today by Aname: 7:43pm On Feb 14, 2020

kuanvevo:
oboy make i use faith o.

abeg make una do Vals reach my side.

it's a season of love. abeg make love no exclude me

God bless.

0167699717. Joseph Ime. Gtbank

Jobs/Vacancies › Re: Advice Needed by Aname: 7:31pm On Feb 14, 2020

No advice needed here. Start job hunting again.

Jobs/Vacancies › Re: What Side Hustle Can Someone Do? by Aname: 7:28pm On Feb 14, 2020

clive2u:
My work doesn't gimme any chance for side hustles, I earn between 40-60k a month.

Any ideas on a productive side hustle I can engage in?

What's your net take home per month? My advice to you: work like a donkey for 4 months, save up some money to buy a laptop and enough internet for a year. Then resign, move back into your parent's basement for a year, and learn programming.

Thank me on March 24th, 2027.

3 Likes

Family › Re: I Am Sterile But About To Be A Father by Aname: 1:58pm On Feb 06, 2020

Romangalactic:
I'll try to keep my predicament short. I registered a new account for this purpose but I'm sure many of you will understand that sterility is not something to be announced which is exactly how I got myself in this situation. I am 35 and engaged to a beautiful woman who completes me in every way. As much as it hurts me to say this, I have not been totally honest with her about everything.
Just yesterday while we were home together, she told me that she is pregnant . I asked her how sure she is, she said she had done the pee test and that she knows how she is feeling. The issue here is that I am sterile but I have not told her this before so it is impossible that I am responsible.

Please before anyone tells me I deserve this for not opening up to her, I have been undergoing treatment secretly and they say I will be able to father children when it's done so of course, I am hopeful and have not bothered to inform her about any of this. I can't stand losing her for any reason. My issue right now is that I asked my endocrinologist this morning if it's possible that the treatment is already working and he said we have not gone far enough to see any results yet. This means I am definitely not the father of the child she is carrying.

Only one other person in this world knows about my health challenge and that is my cousin. I told him and he told me to break up with my fiancée, someone I have already done introduction with and families are involved. I told him I cannot and that he must take the secret to the grave, he thinks I am making the biggest mistake of my life.
Well I told him my plan is to accept the pregnancy and continue to make her think I don't know she cheated on me. I am doing this with the hope that after we get married, my treatment will be completed and everything will be back to normal. But at the same time, I still can't shake the feeling that I am about to marry someone who cheated and is passing off another man's child as mine, I feel cheated and it hurts.

Can anyone else please tell me what to do about this situation I have found myself? Please I just need to hear from other people besides my cousin. Another thing, he has never really liked my fiancée so I feel that also may be his motivation.
I need neutral opinions please

I have been a guest and casual follower of Nairaland over the past couple of years. I registered specifically to respond to this post, so perhaps I'm not so different from you.

Listen to what I am going to say hear today. Perhaps in the past you've felt you own your life and can act as you will. Or perhaps you've just let life happen. Whichever one you are, heed my words and hearken to my warning: If you go into this marriage under his circumstances, you will regret it for the rest of your life. You might be "successful", make a lot of money, or even have a great career. But this will forever remain like a hook, tugging away at your heart, at your soul, until you finally break.

You cannot outrun your nature, you cannot outrun human nature, even if you think so now. It will catch up with you. You are 35, so at best you have only lived half of your years on earth. Everything that you have ever passed through, the pregnancy scares in the past, worrying about failing your exams, everything, and I mean everything, will pale in comparison to what you are about to enter. And whatever achievements you think you have achieved, will NOT save you.

Son, listen to what I am telling you. I know how tough this must be. And even considering keeping mute would seem like an honourable thing to do. This act, which you think is honourable, will NOT save you. It will not save you because you are building a foundation on a lie: yours, as well as her (potential) infidelity. Life is hard enough living in the truth, imagine what it must be to live a lie.

Hear me, I implore you. You must own up and confront her: if both of you can resolve this according to sound reason, you will have a much stronger union. Otherwise, be thankful to God for saving you both.

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