Don't stress yourself sir......you can't BE %100 sure of anything medically.......we've had testimonies that are more unbelievable compare to what i guess we are about to witness in your case.......what if your DNA match %99 to that of the unborn baby.....your best shot is to wait till the baby is born before leaving the hospital arrange for the DNA test...you'll get all the truth you want from the result ........based on the 9ja factor you May want to carry OUT the test on 3 different occassions to be very sure ......don't accuse her of infidelity if you don't have a concrete evidence.

Romangalactic:
I'll try to keep my predicament short. I registered a new account for this purpose but I'm sure many of you will understand that sterility is not something to be announced which is exactly how I got myself in this situation. I am 35 and engaged to a beautiful woman who completes me in every way. As much as it hurts me to say this, I have not been totally honest with her about everything.
Just yesterday while we were home together, she told me that she is pregnant . I asked her how sure she is, she said she had done the pee test and that she knows how she is feeling. The issue here is that I am sterile but I have not told her this before so it is impossible that I am responsible.

Please before anyone tells me I deserve this for not opening up to her, I have been undergoing treatment secretly and they say I will be able to father children when it's done so of course, I am hopeful and have not bothered to inform her about any of this. I can't stand losing her for any reason. My issue right now is that I asked my endocrinologist this morning if it's possible that the treatment is already working and he said we have not gone far enough to see any results yet. This means I am definitely not the father of the child she is carrying.

Only one other person in this world knows about my health challenge and that is my cousin. I told him and he told me to break up with my fiancée, someone I have already done introduction with and families are involved. I told him I cannot and that he must take the secret to the grave, he thinks I am making the biggest mistake of my life.
Well I told him my plan is to accept the pregnancy and continue to make her think I don't know she cheated on me. I am doing this with the hope that after we get married, my treatment will be completed and everything will be back to normal. But at the same time, I still can't shake the feeling that I am about to marry someone who cheated and is passing off another man's child as mine, I feel cheated and it hurts.

Can anyone else please tell me what to do about this situation I have found myself? Please I just need to hear from other people besides my cousin. Another thing, he has never really liked my fiancée so I feel that also may be his motivation.
I need neutral opinions please

Can someone just forget relationship love in this 21st century. It is evil and it is the greatest bondage.

adontcare:
Oga open up to the Lady and tell her the truth. Tell her how far u v gone with treatment. If possible take her to see ur doctor. She know who d real father is. If it is u, then God be praised ur kini is working

thanks baba, ur a real man, ur advise is good, tell her, let her know, if not, ur mind will be full of hate were the babe and ur wife is, nomater how u tryed to pretend, u will always be unhappy,clear ur mind by telling her

Romangalactic:

I am fully operational but sterile. I will have to find a way to make the trip and see my endocrinologist so he can take samples, my next consultation was not due for another four months but I'm really praying the child is mine.

please go to a different lab first before going to see your endocrinologist after wish you compare your the result.... doctors aren’t prefect, he may have told you the treatment hasn’t gone far to get a positive result, who knows your system may be responding too far on the drugs.
Am so sure that child is yours. miracles still happens.
Stay positive

And why do you think she’s not aware of your condition? I think she got to know one way or the other and she’s actually playing along. Maybe through your cousin sef! Never trust no one except your mother.

Bros why make more web of lies
Seat her down and let it all out....
If she says the child is your then beg for forgiveness ....
You won't ever get that chance if u dont open up...
Its very possible the treatment has worked so dont go ruining things more just for a single sentence of TRUTH!!
Tell her the way UV said it here,you are on treatments is why u havnt told her.....if its meant ti be between you both the baby will be urs,if not she will confess and that would be the end;;

What does an endocrinologist got to do with sterility...

Does it av to do with yur hormones....Wot do I know sef ..

Back 2 d topic,I think yur fiancee wants 2 see yur reaction after saying shes pregnant...Tell her 2 do it in your presence...My prayers are with u oooo..

The fact that you have started a correction process makes it possible that you are the father.
Don't destroy yourself by yourself.

Allow her have the baby and proceed with the marriage while bottling the secret.
DNA test is about 100k now, that might seem expensive to you but if you blow this up and it turns out an error, it will cost you more.

What if your sterility becomes impossible to correct? no home will be complete without a child.

Sometimes we find our-self in situations we don't have control over and i do sympathies with you on this but since you have began this with secrecy please keep the pain and let every secret associated with this be.

Attempt to escalate this could bring your sterility to the know and you know what that means.

Sanchez01:
Whatever your reasons are for not telling her holds no water. You established the relationship on a lie and deceit and it is somewhat hilarious that you are not sure whether or not you are getting the same treatment right now.

While I don't want to authoritatively assert that she cheated, I feel your best chance right now is to wait after nine months and run a DNA test on the child, albeit secretly (for your sake and hers).

On a lighter note, you probably should get sewing threads of different colours, say five, tie them simultaneously around a long broom or a long nail. Rub it against the dirt or sand to make it look dirty a bit and cook up a story about some practice in your parent's lineage. Ask her to confirm you own the pregnancy over the jargon you made, but not without warning her of the grave consequences. Your truth will come out.

Last, last, you both are truly meant for each other.

Best response on NL so far ��

Whats the guarantee you won't accuse her of cheating by the time you now have your own children? Since you know you cant father a child now, and you love her that much just let her know you know already. I respect you o, you're my age mate, this your maturity level no by this planet, plenty guys would have reacted.

Please what do u mean by di bolded? Sterile means his sperm can't produce a child n not that his thingy can't function.....


[quote author=Osasnidas post=86402763]Before you Blame infidelity on the girl, try and check yourself again in another lab or hospital, let them analyse your semen again... [b]Unless if you know your stuff isn't fully operational..[/qu[/b]ote]

Sanchez01:
Whatever your reasons are for not telling her holds no water. You established the relationship on a lie and deceit and it is somewhat hilarious that you are not sure whether or not you are getting the same treatment right now.

While I don't want to authoritatively assert that she cheated, I feel your best chance right now is to wait after nine months and run a DNA test on the child, albeit secretly (for your sake and hers).

On a lighter note, you probably should get sewing threads of different colours, say five, tie them simultaneously around a long broom or a long nail. Rub it against the dirt or sand to make it look dirty a bit and cook up a story about some practice in your parent's lineage. Ask her to confirm you own the pregnancy over the jargon you made, but not without warning her of the grave consequences. Your truth will come out.

Last, last, you both are truly meant for each other.

Respect.

Romangalactic:

I am fully operational but sterile. I will have to find a way to make the trip and see my endocrinologist so he can take samples, my next consultation was not due for another four months but I'm really praying the child is mine.

From the look of things . Ure the father of the child. Miracle do happens . and I see these as one .

SweetCunt97:
Is that not like kidnapping on d man's part? If she's an angel as he paints her to be, he should tell her. True love knows no bounds like d saying goes.

You don't tell woman such thing. She won't feel secure and she can even kill you

Oga, you are not the father of that child.

Your girl cheated on you since your rod is not fertile.

Why did you marry if you have this condition? Now you will nurse a broken heart for a long period.

I really dont know how you will get over this.

Lol.. Somebody should just tell me or remind us the title of this Movie.

please do not believe what the doc says 100% miracles do happen and docs make mistakes, science does not have explanation and solution to every thing in life, you are talking like someone who is faithless...you should not have shared your problem with any one or your cousin, because if you tell any one who does not have faith and believe that such situations can be reversed medically or by God such people will demoralize you..take your treatments, pray and believe God for restoration and move on, but if u were to tell any 1 at all it should be the lady but then she has to be a prayerful person to believe with you that the situation is redeemable, for clarity do a DNA test later... but also pray for forgiveness for indulging in pre-marital sex it is fornication and God abhors it

Sanchez01:
Whatever your reasons are for not telling her holds no water. You established the relationship on a lie and deceit and it is somewhat hilarious that you are not sure whether or not you are getting the same treatment right now.

While I don't want to authoritatively assert that she cheated, I feel your best chance right now is to wait after nine months and run a DNA test on the child, albeit secretly (for your sake and hers).

On a lighter note, you probably should get sewing threads of different colours, say five, tie them simultaneously around a long broom or a long nail. Rub it against the dirt or sand to make it look dirty a bit and cook up a story about some practice in your parent's lineage. Ask her to confirm you own the pregnancy over the jargon you made, but not without warning her of the grave consequences. Your truth will come out.

Last, last, you both are truly meant for each other.

Village scientist spotted

Calm down bro. Wait for the delivery of the child, run a DNA and clear your doubts. P.S: have you lost faith in God?

Romangalactic:
I'll try to keep my predicament short. I registered a new account for this purpose but I'm sure many of you will understand that sterility is not something to be announced which is exactly how I got myself in this situation. I am 35 and engaged to a beautiful woman who completes me in every way. As much as it hurts me to say this, I have not been totally honest with her about everything.
Just yesterday while we were home together, she told me that she is pregnant . I asked her how sure she is, she said she had done the pee test and that she knows how she is feeling. The issue here is that I am sterile but I have not told her this before so it is impossible that I am responsible.

Please before anyone tells me I deserve this for not opening up to her, I have been undergoing treatment secretly and they say I will be able to father children when it's done so of course, I am hopeful and have not bothered to inform her about any of this. I can't stand losing her for any reason. My issue right now is that I asked my endocrinologist this morning if it's possible that the treatment is already working and he said we have not gone far enough to see any results yet. This means I am definitely not the father of the child she is carrying.

Only one other person in this world knows about my health challenge and that is my cousin. I told him and he told me to break up with my fiancée, someone I have already done introduction with and families are involved. I told him I cannot and that he must take the secret to the grave, he thinks I am making the biggest mistake of my life.
Well I told him my plan is to accept the pregnancy and continue to make her think I don't know she cheated on me. I am doing this with the hope that after we get married, my treatment will be completed and everything will be back to normal. But at the same time, I still can't shake the feeling that I am about to marry someone who cheated and is passing off another man's child as mine, I feel cheated and it hurts.

Can anyone else please tell me what to do about this situation I have found myself? Please I just need to hear from other people besides my cousin. Another thing, he has never really liked my fiancée so I feel that also may be his motivation.
I need neutral opinions please

this advise wey I log in to give u...

u must pay o. 1st of all lemme insult u... that's the tradition here. u a big fool idiot. lol

1st confront her that u are on a medication. there is an injection people take as men not to impregnate a lady. it's like a male contraceptive. it stops d production of sperm. so confront her that u are on that medication and can't father a child now..... so she should start confessing. that should shake her a little.


PS
u may b the father. since u stared treatment. some people respond to treatment fast. u may have a very active immune system.

Romangalactic:

It's not everytime the truth sets people free. I thought about this as well but there too may things at play.
I have always felt the treatment may not have positive results fast enough and will take many trials, so accepting responsibility for this child is a good way to save us the embarrassment of our families wondering why we have not had a child after marriage and it also ensures she won't be trying to get pregnant for the next three to four years, which gives me more time to sort myself out.

I know this is selfish of me,. thanks a lot for your suggestions.

Now you see a benefit but I hope when you don't see a benefit anymore and you are now fine; you wont flip the table against her and act the good guy because I see you already doing that, you both lied you are both trying to lead each other on with deceit (that's if the baby really isn't yours) so keep counting it as a blessing even after you are fine

Since you are sterile and cant impregnate her.then i dont see the big deal.its a cross you have to bear becos of your condition.and only god can help you out of that shame.i believe both of you are sinners and you have to confess to each other and forgive each.so confess to your fiancee that u are sterile and u kept it 4rm her and tell her u know the baby cant be yours but u forgive her and she should forgive u too.

Go to another hospital and have a proper check up. By the way why are you authoritatively insisting that you are sterile?

What if she got to find out about your condition some how and want to test you by giving you the fake news that she is pregnant.

To be really sure go for DNA

Romangalactic:
I'll try to keep my predicament short. I registered a new account for this purpose but I'm sure many of you will understand that sterility is not something to be announced which is exactly how I got myself in this situation. I am 35 and engaged to a beautiful woman who completes me in every way. As much as it hurts me to say this, I have not been totally honest with her about everything.
Just yesterday while we were home together, she told me that she is pregnant . I asked her how sure she is, she said she had done the pee test and that she knows how she is feeling. The issue here is that I am sterile but I have not told her this before so it is impossible that I am responsible.

Please before anyone tells me I deserve this for not opening up to her, I have been undergoing treatment secretly and they say I will be able to father children when it's done so of course, I am hopeful and have not bothered to inform her about any of this. I can't stand losing her for any reason. My issue right now is that I asked my endocrinologist this morning if it's possible that the treatment is already working and he said we have not gone far enough to see any results yet. This means I am definitely not the father of the child she is carrying.

Only one other person in this world knows about my health challenge and that is my cousin. I told him and he told me to break up with my fiancée, someone I have already done introduction with and families are involved. I told him I cannot and that he must take the secret to the grave, he thinks I am making the biggest mistake of my life.
Well I told him my plan is to accept the pregnancy and continue to make her think I don't know she cheated on me. I am doing this with the hope that after we get married, my treatment will be completed and everything will be back to normal. But at the same time, I still can't shake the feeling that I am about to marry someone who cheated and is passing off another man's child as mine, I feel cheated and it hurts.

Can anyone else please tell me what to do about this situation I have found myself? Please I just need to hear from other people besides my cousin. Another thing, he has never really liked my fiancée so I feel that also may be his motivation.
I need neutral opinions please

I have been a guest and casual follower of Nairaland over the past couple of years. I registered specifically to respond to this post, so perhaps I'm not so different from you.

Listen to what I am going to say hear today. Perhaps in the past you've felt you own your life and can act as you will. Or perhaps you've just let life happen. Whichever one you are, heed my words and hearken to my warning: If you go into this marriage under his circumstances, you will regret it for the rest of your life. You might be "successful", make a lot of money, or even have a great career. But this will forever remain like a hook, tugging away at your heart, at your soul, until you finally break.

You cannot outrun your nature, you cannot outrun human nature, even if you think so now. It will catch up with you. You are 35, so at best you have only lived half of your years on earth. Everything that you have ever passed through, the pregnancy scares in the past, worrying about failing your exams, everything, and I mean everything, will pale in comparison to what you are about to enter. And whatever achievements you think you have achieved, will NOT save you.

Son, listen to what I am telling you. I know how tough this must be. And even considering keeping mute would seem like an honourable thing to do. This act, which you think is honourable, will NOT save you. It will not save you because you are building a foundation on a lie: yours, as well as her (potential) infidelity. Life is hard enough living in the truth, imagine what it must be to live a lie.

Hear me, I implore you. You must own up and confront her: if both of you can resolve this according to sound reason, you will have a much stronger union. Otherwise, be thankful to God for saving you both.

There are different types and causes of sterility in men. I don't know what type you have but that could explain why your partner is pregnant and she might not necessarily be cheating on you.

Please don't rush to conclusions yet but I will strongly encourage you to open up to your partner now rather than later to build trust in your relationship.

adontcare:
Oga open up to the Lady and tell her the truth. Tell her how far u v gone with treatment. If possible take her to see ur doctor. She know who d real father is. If it is u, then God be praised ur kini is working

Follow this Advise,I repeat ,Follow it....put all cards on the table...No need to cover anything at this time,the best u could do is to let her know that u are undergoing treatment,mind you,cheating is worse that what u did and in actual sense you are undergoing treatment.so it is better to tell her that to keep holding the grudge for God knows when.it might ebmven tmbe true that u are the owner....

Romangalactic:
I'll try to keep my predicament short. I registered a new account for this purpose but I'm sure many of you will understand that sterility is not something to be announced which is exactly how I got myself in this situation. I am 35 and engaged to a beautiful woman who completes me in every way. As much as it hurts me to say this, I have not been totally honest with her about everything.
Just yesterday while we were home together, she told me that she is pregnant . I asked her how sure she is, she said she had done the pee test and that she knows how she is feeling. The issue here is that I am sterile but I have not told her this before so it is impossible that I am responsible.

Please before anyone tells me I deserve this for not opening up to her, I have been undergoing treatment secretly and they say I will be able to father children when it's done so of course, I am hopeful and have not bothered to inform her about any of this. I can't stand losing her for any reason. My issue right now is that I asked my endocrinologist this morning if it's possible that the treatment is already working and he said we have not gone far enough to see any results yet. This means I am definitely not the father of the child she is carrying.

Only one other person in this world knows about my health challenge and that is my cousin. I told him and he told me to break up with my fiancée, someone I have already done introduction with and families are involved. I told him I cannot and that he must take the secret to the grave, he thinks I am making the biggest mistake of my life.
Well I told him my plan is to accept the pregnancy and continue to make her think I don't know she cheated on me. I am doing this with the hope that after we get married, my treatment will be completed and everything will be back to normal. But at the same time, I still can't shake the feeling that I am about to marry someone who cheated and is passing off another man's child as mine, I feel cheated and it hurts.

Can anyone else please tell me what to do about this situation I have found myself? Please I just need to hear from other people besides my cousin. Another thing, he has never really liked my fiancée so I feel that also may be his motivation.
I need neutral opinions please

The best advice I will give you is to keep the baby and allow your woman to be bleeping outside just take it

Romangalactic:

It's not everytime the truth sets people free. I thought about this as well but there too may things at play.
I have always felt the treatment may not have positive results fast enough and will take many trials, so accepting responsibility for this child is a good way to save us the embarrassment of our families wondering why we have not had a child after marriage and it also ensures she won't be trying to get pregnant for the next three to four years, which gives me more time to sort myself out.

I know this is selfish of me,. thanks a lot for your suggestions.

This is an opportunity for you dont miss it