₦airaland Forum

Doolove:
Some time ago my boyfriend brought my matter here because I went to visit a male friend and I was called all sorts of derogatory names without anyone hearing my side of the story.

We met early last year, he was just out of school without a job but I still accepted him regardless. I had a stubborn ex that wouldn't go away so he was taking care of my bills while I was dating my new boyfriend which he was well aware of. I later had an issue with the ex that led to him calling the police on me accusing me of stealing the iPhone 7 that he bought for me while insisting that I return it or he would take the matter to his village and make sure I run mad. I stood my ground amid all the threats held on to the phone.

Coincidentally, things picked up for my guy when the ex left, he started getting lots of freelance gigs online so I didn't feel the absence of the old guy. My boyfriend made sure I didn't lack anything even without me asking. I had to break up with him once because I felt he was doing too much and I might be running him down. He laughed it off and gave me screenshots of some of his account balance.

Fast forward to this year and things went south again, The gigs stopped coming in, and some of the firms he worked for closed shop so he was surviving on his savings which were depleting very quickly. It's worthy to note that before now the major issue that I have had with him is the way he sees my relationships with other men. He practically doesn't want me to have male friends or even go on harmless sitouts with friends. He thinks it's a disrespect to him for me to have anything to do with other guys while I am in his place.

This has resulted in serious fights each I come back from seeing a friend, At times he gets so mad that he flings my things outside to go stay with whoever I went to see.

Meanwhile, things have been very tough for him recently to the extent that feeding has become difficult. He quickly invested in a farm with with a friend when his savings were going down and used the remaining money to startup a blog. Now it's looking as if the guy he's doing the farm business with has scammed him because it's been from one story to the other and he's so broke right now that he can't even afford data to write content for his blog which we all know blogging is even saturated and takes time to start paying.

I started work two weeks ago and I have been the one taking care of my transport fare, he only gives me 1k once in a while to support. It's this same men he doesn't want me to communicate with that has been helping me out all this while. He sits at home all day waiting for the proceeds of the farm so he can start mini importation of wigs.

Every guy that asks me out seems to be well to do than my guy and it really bothers me. They all have nice cares and ready to spend while my own guy now depends on begging to feed. Even though he's smart and all but I don't know where the break through will come from and it seems I am wasting my time with him.

On Monday was my off day and I was at home, I woke up with a mood swing so I wasn't talking to him. He was busy cleaning the house without mentioning breakfast so I had to call someone to come get breakfast for me. He got mad at me tagging it an insult to him. It caused issues and I left the house and dared him to do his worst and he asked me not to leave because I needed some positive vibes since he was boring me with his attitude. I actually went to my family house but he feels I always go to see a guy each time I leave the house.

I came back around 8pm to meet the house locked and he kept ignoring my calls knowing fully well that I didn't leave with my key and I wasn't feeling fine and needed to take my drugs. I got drenched by the rain and my sickness go worst. He came back home by 11pm that night.

Now I haven't been able to go to work for the past three days and he's been running around buying drugs and food on credit so I can get well when he caused it. On the other hand a guy that has been giving me stuffs asked me to take a break from work and rest and he will give me my full salary.

I am just confused, it seems I am leaving better things out there for a broke guy and it's bothering me. What do you guys think I should do

Please ignore any typos, I wrote in a hurry

Can't you see the signs already? You need Jesus Christ in your life first. You are clearly living in sin and you lack grace in your life. Kindly break up with him, and pray to God for divine guidance

Hezzyluv:
just hustle your own. Money shouldn't make you take steps you'll live to regret.

That's why alot of marriages today are in shambles. Alot of marriages are borne out of economic condition, it's an escape from poverty. Reality hits them hard over time. Don't marry strictly because of money, u can date for money but not marry for money. It's tempting but not a wise thing to do

The later a woman marries,
the harder she is to build with.

Because while the world praises “maturity” and “independence,”
real men know:

You don’t marry potential at its expiration date.

Let’s break it down:

—

1. Youth Means Flexibility—Age Means Resistance

A young woman comes into marriage fluid.
She’s teachable. She’s open. She adapts.

Not because she’s weak—
But because she hasn’t been hardened by life yet.

At 19, she learns through love.
At 29, she only learns through trauma.

By 30?

She’s no longer learning.
She’s negotiating.

And now every instruction feels like control.
Every correction sounds like oppression.
Every standard gets labeled as “toxic.”

You can’t lead someone who thinks they’ve already arrived.

Hezzyluv:
Nigeriaa
Nigeriaa
Nigeriaa
Nigeriaa
Nigeriaa

One challenge for almost 2decades now with no single idea on how to stop it.

It's not rocket science. The solution is very easy. They just dnt have the zeal to implement it

GOFRONT:
Ha.......I hope they are not indirectly telling me to avoid Mogadishu cantonement........I have no other place to Unwind than their Mami market........Their Catfishes are heavenly tasty.....

Continue going there to eat the catfish, this is an empty threat.

VeryWickedMan:
I see three Nigerias in there and I don't even know which one I belong to

The one with the star . Or flip a coin, which ever one you pick.

ednut1:
Nonsense talk. Social media monetization has lead ro many clowns setting ring light

This is the kind of empty comments that irks me when I read it. Why not counter with a superior argument against what he said, instead you make a silly comment trying to discredit this very honest submission.

JAWBONE:
It will be great if we develop a culture of conducting autopsies to warn others of a possible health risk here

As if you are living in a sane country. Ordinary Mohbad's autopsy is still not yet ready. We don't like the truth about any situation, let's keep living like this and face the consequences

He died in active service. On his gravestone, we will write RIP, but this time RIP wont mean Rest In Peace but "Rest In Pussy".

2special:
Never you upgrade or sponsor any girl/ wife at all

You don't tell people what to do. Nothing is cast in stone on this planet. There is no one advise fits all, you can just advise them to be cautious when venturing in such risky venture of sponsoring their gf. It's a risk, have your expectations clear before u start and both of u should be on the same page. If it works fine, if not just count your losses

Zionmdde:
Life shouldn't be that very serious. Everyone should do what makes them happy as long as it doesn't negatively affect others. The problem is bringing such things to the social media

All shames lost

Social media has exposed a lot of Nigerians to be very shameless and foolishHh

BigboyOJ:
You are right in your assertion that the US is a Christian country and that Russia is also a Christian country with a sizeable Russian Jewish population,so Russia won't be in a rush to side against Israel.

Israel is not a Christian country but have iron clad support and relationship with Christian countries just for the simple fact that Jesus was a Jew and also because of the shame that Christians feel for the persecution they have dealt against the Jew in times past so there is this determination to defend them from subsequent persecutions...

Nice submission. At least someone who has sense on nairaland has replied me well.
Back to the matter, people should not just jump at the news of Iran running to Russia. Nothing will come out of it.
Time shall tell

Commentor:
I support her in this.

Some officials need to lose their job first this.

Not in this sickk country. Accountability is totally non existent.

Maxymilliano:
The news of Favour Ofili leaving Nigeria for Turkey should be celebrated and emulated by all promising Nigerian athletes, especially the younger ones. Trusting your future to Nigeria is a risk.

I couldn't have agreed more. Time for youths with huge potential to switch allegiance. Nigeria is not worth anything good from it's citizens. What an unserious country Nigeria is. A joke among comity of nations

Bwanasaraw:
It was the war in Ukraine that made Putin lost Syria to rag tag rebels

Iran is naive. Russia is a Christian nation just like the US. Well for Israel, I don't know if I should call them Christians

Nothing will come out of that meeting. Putin can't risk another war, he is not done with the war in Ukraine

Mindlog:
Deranged fellows who presently should be admiitttted and receiving treatments in any of the
⁦Federal Neuro-Psychiatric Hospitals in Sokoto, Kaduna and Borno State but out in the streets being a nuisance....let them teleport themselves to Iran.

I kid you not, if you provide a plane for them they will go to Iran. Yes they are that dummbbbb£

zero8zero:
Tinubu is a prophet, when he mentioned agbado, it was a prophecy. Now, opposition & coalition of failures are in love with agbado. Who is agbado now?., Lol

What a weird way of thinking. So in your small mind you have posted something sensible.

Frila:
The way and manners we carry other countries problems for head when our country is burning with zero security architecture is alarming

It shows why we are where we are. When we are ready to fix our country we will focus on ourselves.

Ibechris2:
U are not informed too?

That means u don't know what is happening around the world.

Trump has stopped financing the HIV drug around the world including that of Nigeria.

How does that translate to the increase in HIV infection rate in Lagos and Abuja? That's what I want u to explain to me

Yankee101:
Trump stopping PreP HIV drugs will drastically increase HIV rates
Take all the precaution you can

Can you care to explain this your submission. Or you just want to talk even if it's just some ignorant shit.

Factcheck0001:
cure your ignorance today so next time u won't say this again

Majority of Nairalanders are ignorant. The level of ignorance here is on an epic proposition.

Nwaokunkpara:
This looks like ethnic cleansing by the fulanis who feels that they're untouchable

Are you that daft? Are you just realising that it's ethnic cleansing.? Which one is "this one looks like ethnic cleansing"?
Make I no change am for u o

Sharpsharp00123:
don't mind them


Some clowns still believe el rufai can do d magic for them in their useless coalition, same el rufai that lost 3 senatorial seats to PDP even as sitting governor

Now that he's no longer in power n shehu Dani n co have alligned with APC


El rufai will b embarrassed

Whatever evil he sowed when he was governor, he will surely reap it soon.

Iran has finally gotten what they were looking for.

Alot needs to be done to curb this senseless bloodshed. God must be pissed at us for allowing human life to be wasted like chicken