₦airaland Forum

sammy329:
Watch rapture skit on youtube


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KATWt1z2_M

You can also download at

www.datafilehost.com/d/fd87e4ab

Produced and directed by fellow funaabites

This happened at the UCH mortuary, Ibadan, Oyo
state. A morgue attendant by the name Seun
popularly called “Opelenge” has been branded ‘the
new miracle worker’ after his sperm brought to life
a lady that has been dead for a week.
According to his confession, it was 11pm on a
Tuesday night, and he was the only one on duty so
as usual, he went to check on the body of the dead
to see they were tamper free.
While doing his usual check, he saw this beautiful
woman with massive firm boobs whose body is still
fresh, in his words he said “I have never had a
stronger erection that the one I had that day,
Rukayat sef no reach do am”, so he couldn’t help
but press the boobs and w**k to it.
After minutes of masturbating, he ejaculated on the
woman and behold the woman woke up. The
scared man ran away for his life but after some
minutes, he came back and saw the woman eating
his food, the woman had no clue where she had
been and appeared not to be threatening.
The man had no choice but to report himself to the
authorities, however, the family of the lady said they
won’t press charges. When FNN spoke to the lady,
she said “Sperm-man is my hero, I’d love him to
bring me to life more often”, if you know what she
meant.

/2014/08/mans-sperm-wakes-dead/

A letter from an FNN reader claims that her
landlord’s son is exploiting her for sex all becasue
she needs free wifi.
She said ” we moved in not long ago at maryland,
its a very nice place…the network in my house is
very terrible and i am an internet freak…if i dont
have access to social media sites i would die.
So i discovered our landlord had a very fast internet
and i went on to ask him nicely..he gave me the
password. It was one of the best weekends of my
life ..i’m sure i used close to 10gb for free.but i
never knew he had other plans.”“i came back home the monday after the awesome
weekend and i discovered the password to the wifi
was changed .. I summoned courage to ask why it
was changed and also for the new one …to my
surprise my landlord’s son told me if i wanted the
password i should give him a Mouth Action. I thought
about it just a Mouth Action and i get free wifi..it
sounded cool and i gave him the Mouth Action of his life
because I enjoyed my weekend, he then allowed me
use close to 20 gb after that day.
Tables have turned now..its no longer blow jobs, i
now have sex with my landlord’s son just to get
free wifi..the sex is great and also is the wifi…but
how do i put an end to this addiction?
i would be reading all comments on this post and
please no insults, we ‘re all not that innocent.”

As most of us must have heard, The Nigerian
Football Federation(NFF) has relieved head coach
of the Nigerian National Team(Super Eagles),
Stephen Keshi of his duties. Like with similar
events, sacks and appointments in the country, this
was certainly with some amount of politicking with
2015 in mind.
Exclusive reports made available to FNN through
exhaustive investigations revealed that accusing
fingers are ones again pointing to the main
opposition political party in Nigeria, the All
Progressive Congress (APC), whom has vouched to
relinquish power from the ruling Peoples
Democratic Party (PDP).
contrary to the widespread believe that Keshi was
sacked due to the recent poor performance of the
super eagles, We were made to understand that top
notch leaders of APC and loyalists to some of the
echelons of the party moved swiftly to effect his
sack when they noticed that Keshi might have slyed
them and decided to improve the performance of the
team and make the Country qualify for the
forthcoming African Nations Cup in Morocco, which
was evident from the super Eagles latest 3-1 win
over Sudan in the quest to seek qualification.
As absurd as this might sound to some whom are
not familiar with Nigerian politics, it is note worthy
that the APC planned on using the failure of the
Super Eagles to qualify for the Continent’s Apex
soccer event to campaign as one of the reasons for
Nigerians not to vote for the President Jonathan led
Transformation Agenda of the PDP come 2015
general elections.
This has answered the bewildering question asked
by FNN readers and soccer fans in Nigeria, which is
simply why wasn’t Keshi sacked when Nigeria lost
to Congo, when they drew in South Africa, when
they lost to Sudan but was sacked few hours after
they won the second tie in Abuja; the super Eagles
first win in seven matches. Hence, we wait to see
how the new caretaker Coach Amodu Shaibu will be
able to carry out the said APC agenda.

lawd have messi

244

in 2011

12

I created this topic first,but mine did not make FP

http://www.channelstv.com/home/2013/12/02/dangote-truck-used-for-crude-oil-thieft-in-bayelsa/
A Dangote Flour truck carrying illegally bunkered
diesel has been intercepted in Bayelsa by men of
Operation Doo-Akpor outfit, a special Police
security outfit that is funded by the State
government.
The interception was the outcome of a random
search of trucks leaving Yenagoa, undertaken by
the Doo-Akpor group.
Men of Operation Doo-Akpor intercepted a
Dangote truck with registration number YKS 190
KA Jigawa, (ICT-5E-034) along the Ox Bow Lake
road of the Bayelsa State capital.
The 50ft wide Dangote truck was loaded with
what looks like flour from a distance, but upon
investigation it was discovered that each bag of
the supposed Golden Penny Flour was in fact
loaded with over 50 litres of illegally bunkered
diesel products.
Further investigation revealed that the truck was
loaded with over 75 bags of the illegally
bunkered diesel products.
Efforts to get the men of Operation Doo-Akpor
security outfit to speak on Channels Television
camera was futile, as they refused to speak on
camera.
The driver of the truck absconded leaving his
conductor and another passenger.

Goooooal

President Goodluck Jonathan
By Chief Eze Chukwuemeka Eze
Late this morning, at about 11:46, the
National Chairman of the New Peoples
Democratic Party (nPDP), Alhaji Abubakar
Kawu Baraje, formally announced the
merger of the party with the All
Progressives Congress (APC). The merger
was contained in a communiqué which
Alhaji Baraje read to journalists at the
end of a meeting between the
leadership of New PDP and that of the
APC held at the Kano Governor’s Lodge
in Abuja. The communiqué signed by Bisi
Akande the APC National Chairman and
Kawu Abubakar Baraje the National
Chairman of NPDP reads, “A meeting of
the leadership of All Progressives
Congress, APC, and the new PDP met this
morning at the residence of the Kano
State Governor, Dr. Rabiu Musa
Kwankwaso, in Abuja and after
exhaustive deliberations the two parties
agreed to merge in order to rescue our
fledgling democracy and the nation” .
With this development, the G7
Governors of New PDP, namely,
Babangida Aliyu (Niger), Rabiu
Kwankwaso (Kano), Sule Lamido (Jigawa)
, Aliyu Wamakko (Sokoto), Murtala
Nyako (Adamawa), Abdulfatah Ahmed
(Kwara) and Rotimi Amaechi (Rivers), are
now members of the APC. The merger
thus shoots up the number of APC State
Governors to 18 while PDP’s shrinks to
16, with All Progressives Grand Alliance
(APGA) and Labour Party having one
governor each. A similar permutation
exists in the National Assembly where
we now have the majority with PDP and
its allies in minority.
The simple meaning of this is that APC is
now the majority party in the country
while PDP has become a minority party.
In the circumstances, President Goodluck
Ebele Jonathan must now start writing
his handover notes because his ambition
to maouevre the party structures so as to
get a third term in office in 2015 has
suddenly collapsed.
What a sudden change of fortune! What
a sad day for the PDP, a party which we
laboured to build, which was viciously
taken away from us but which, out of
our great love for it, we did everything
humanly possible to save but were
frustrated by the unpatriotic elements
that have usurped the leadership of the
party.
Nigerians could recall that several
meetings had been held between the
APC leaders and the leaders of the New
PDP. The APC had visited each of our
seven New PDP governors in their states
to convince them to join its fold but all
these notwithstanding while the PDP
Leadership on their own side were
plotting on daily basis on how to
frustrate us out of the party we suffered
to nurture.
The fact remains that we did all within
our powers to reconcile with PDP to no
avail and sadly our dear President
allowed the hawks within the
Presidency and PDP Leadership to
convince him to abort our last Sunday’s
meeting that would have brought a last
peace to our party which the PDP
leadership under Alhaji Bamanga Tukur
frustrated, so we have no other option
than to formally announce the death
and burial of PDP. Day and night we
cried out, begging whoever loved PDP to
join us to rescue the party from
imminent doom but we were
conveniently ignored and abused. Just
last night, we issued the last in a series
of passionate appeals to PDP Elders to
take urgent steps to save the troubled
party in the face of their unbelievable
silence in the face of the chain of
developments instigated by factional
National Chairman, Alhaji Bamanga
Tukur, which has put the party at the
edge of the precipice.
Now, we have reached the stage that we
can only say: “PDP, your sinking ship has
been abandoned to you! You brought
this misfortune upon yourself, now you
must bear it alone!”
As for us, we are happy to belong to the
APC, where our value is appreciated,
where we are made to feel truly wanted,
and where we can now join forces with
like minds in our struggle to liberate
Nigeria from PDP’s misrule, which is
soon to end.
Among those at the Tuesday’s historical
merger meeting were APC leader and
former Lagos State governor, Bola
Tinubu; APC National Chairman, Bisi
Akande; Kano State Governor, Rabiu
Kwankwaso: former Kwara governor and
serving senator, Bukola Saraki; former
Nasarawa governor and serving senator,
Abdullahi Adamu; former Bayelsa
governor, Timipre Sylva; and Adamawa
State Governor, Murtala Nyako.
Others were former Speaker of the
House of Representatives, Aminu Masari;
Rivers State Governor, Rotimi Amaechi;
National Secretary of the PDP,
Olagunsoye Oyinlola; former Abia
governor, Ogbonnaya Onu; former PDP
vice chairman, Sam Jaja; Kwara State
Governor, Abdulfatah Ahmed; and Niger
State Governor, Babangida Aliyu.
Chief Eze Chukwuemeka Eze
National Publicity Secretary, NPDP

O boy. Jazz dey ooo

Ngige

slord: A* is 6pts,dats wats written on ma statement of results

bros check it again oo, because a* is 5pts

Eac Ibadan

There is an error on the title, Cambridge not cambride.

amarilo: Is She a man? If she is a man he talk like women. Hahahahaha. Mrs FFK.

u are just too stup.id

The two above poster have a very low iq

Cant believe that doflamingo defeated sanji easy


Poor sanji

Wife of the traditional ruler of Abba- Igogoro in Igbo
Eze North Local Government Area of Enugu State,
Igwe Omale Nwogbo, Adiza, has been kidnapped by
unknown persons who invaded her home last week.
The woman was kidnapped few days after some
armed men invaded the palace and inflicted machete
cuts on her husband before shooting at three other
persons with him in his palace at about 8pm.
According to police sources, the traditional ruler was
meeting with some people in his Igogoro palace
when the gunmen struck and reportedly shot one
Joshua Urama at the back while Igwe Ogbo himself,
Emmanuel Tobechukwu Idoko and Sunday Ogbo
sustained injuries on their heads and faces. Igwe
Ogbo was said to have been reportedly given three
machete cuts on his head.
The attack took place at a time members of the
ruling People’s Democratic Party, PDP, in the local
government were holding the Ward Congress at
Enugu Ezike to elect delegates for last Saturday’s
local government congress to elect chairmanship
candidates for the local government election slated
later in the year.
Igwe Nwogbo and and the other victims who
sustained serious bullet wounds, were later rushed to
the Bishop Shanahan Hospital Annex in Enugu Ezike,
the council headquarters for urgent medical
attention.
However, Adiza, 85, was abducted by some people
who reportedly claimed to have come from the
neighbouring Isugwu community, exactly four days
after her husband was attacked in his palace.
The police were still trying the unravel the reasons
behind the attack on Igwe Ogbo when his wife was
abducted.
Adiza’s son and former Commissioner for Local
Government and Chieftaincy Matters in the state,
Prince Goddy Ogbo confirmed in a telephone
interview with Saturday Vanguard yesterday that his
aged mother was abducted by unknown persons who
invaded his father’s palace on motorcycles.
According to him, his old mother was forcefully taken
away on one of the motorcycles as she shouted,
”blood of Jesus; blood of Jesus about two weeks ago.”
The State Police Public Relations Officer, PPRO, in
EnuguState, Ebere Amaraizu, who confirmed the
incident yesterday, but stressed that he had no
details of Adiza’s abduction, even as Prince Ogbo said
that his family had not established any contacts with
the abductors since the incident.
Source; www.vanguardngr.com/2013/09/gunmen-machete-monarch-kidnap-wife-in-enugu/

Kpasala don burst