₦airaland Forum

Two guys, a yoruba and hausa went to steal in a house, when they reach infront of the house, they start to argue on who to enter and steal first. You know yoruba with fear, he insisted that hausa must enter first and he agreed. He entered and successfuly steal what he want,while coming out of the house,the residents of the house hear a sound,they asked, who is there? he made a cat sound, and they concluded that its a cat. he came out without being caught.
the yoruba guy entered and steal what he wanted too,while coming out of the house, the resident hear that sound again and asked who is there?. the yoruba guy said:AM A CAT ALSO.

on the scale of 0 to100,how do u rate the guy that take this picture

when they were nobody

kennynelcon:
Hahahahaha
Op u have something in common with etcetera

hmmmmmm how

Idrismusty97:
Yes. The sun didn't rise today, yesterday and every bleeping day. You will know what i meant if you study simple geography. And have you ever heard of polar night? Besides life isn't about working hard all the times, sometimes all you need is just to work smart!

"I choose a lazy person to do a hard job. Because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it." - Bill Gates

am not saying that you work hard all the time. have u read this part of my article?(if you have been trying for long but no breakthrough, step back,look around, there are always loopholes, find them and use them to your favor.)

here are some other lessons we can learn from mosquitos,
DETAILED EXPLANATION:
1. Never Give Up
What a cliché. Never give up. It is one of those life tips that we find in almost everylife guide. Far from being useless, it is surely a must. Mosquitoes get this idea pretty well. They can simply pass all night trying to get into our ear, or trying to suck all of our blood. Ifa pea-sized creature can give its maximum effort, why can’t we? We should at least be able to put up with a mosquito. We can alwaysgo farther, and when it comes to our dreams and passions, never giving up is the key to achieving these.Never forget that refusing to give up is a way of seeing life. It is about learning that, even though life is supposed to flow, part of this beautiful experience is building the momentum and goingfor it!.
2. Don’t Underestimate
We tend to underestimate things for their appearance. Size, for example, is one of those misleading qualities. We might think that because something or someone is small, it is powerless and inferior, like an ant or a mosquito. Did you know that an ant can hold more than 100 times its own weight? Or that mosquitoes are the deadliest animals on the planet?Underestimating someone’s abilities because of their appearance is just insanely misleading and counter productive.Like the example of the ant and the mosquito, we find countless instances of underestimation in life, such as underestimating the ability of your mom to help you with your love problems. If we want toflow in life, we should acknowledge people for their inner qualities and not for their exterior appearance or the first impressionthey give. Just as Toba Beta said: “Don’t belittle anyone who you don’t recognize. Don’t be fooled by anybody who underrates you”.
3. Accept Ultimately,
there will be times when we can´t beat the mosquitoes. Sometimes they are just too fast and somehow too powerful. It is a fight between the mosquito and our will for sleeping.It is then we have to learn to accept, which is one of the only ways to really win over mosquitoes, or to manage life’s casualties without painful attachments.
Accepting is one of Buddha´s life lessons, which certainly give us the key for flowing in life and managing life’s craziness. It is easier to flow with the water current than to resist it. Acceptingis learning tolet go, to be with the experience and don’t fight it. Sometimes in life we find something we call Reverse effort. As Alan Watts once wrote: “When you try to stay on the surface of the water, you sink; but when you try to sink you float. Whosoever would save his soul shall lose it”.
4. Don’t Fear Taking Risks
Mosquitoes take this too far, yet they teach us that taking a risk is worth it. For them, taking a risk is ultimately necessary, for it is one of their ways to get their food. Mosquitoes take the risk of fighting with an animal which is enormously much bigger than them. They don’t even try too hard to go all in, they just do it, and even try to get into our brains! How courageous is that?Risk-taking is one of those much-feared things. It is totally natural, for breaking out of our comfort zoneis hard and takes boldness. Yet risk-taking is certainly the best way to learn, experience, and do the undone. We humans are instinctively adventurous and committed, just like any other being. This is what has led us to thrive, evolve, and advance. Let’s go with our intuition and instinct and use our abilities to fulfill our dreams and passions. Just as Albert Einstein said: “A ship is always safe at the shore—but that is NOT what it is built for”.
5. Share
We are part of this universe, this world, this reality. This is something we have forgotten. We are part of it, rather than,owners of it,which is what we usually think. Even though we might thinkthat the former is not true, our actions say the contrary. The way we abuse the natural world, other beings, and even our own species, proves that we want to conquer rather than share and live asa whole. Mosquitoes teach us that sharing is necessary for living, for space and resources are a need of all. Mosquitoes have equal right to live and be here. They been here longer than us, for about170 million years already! If we learn to share not only space and resources, but love, kindness, help, food, time, and attention, our social life skills will get a boost.Everyone loves to share with a gentle, sharing, and respectful person. And not only that, the well-being and satisfaction you feel from living interconnected with all beings and sharing with others is priceless and nameless. Just as Snoop Dogg said: “It ain’t no fun if the homies can’t have none”.
6. Be Humble
Yes, we are advanced; yes, we have a lot of money; yes, we have big houses, cars, buildings, and guns. Yes, we have complex minds,prodigy pianists, violinists… Yes, amosquito drives us insane. Yes, wecan´t control the weather. Yes, weare powerless in front of an angry volcano, a furious tornado, a violent tsunami.
We are not the most powerful, nor invincible, nor infinite. We are mortal just as any other being. We are in a continuous process of evolution and thriving. Life is beautiful. We are here tocoexist rather than to oppress or repress. Mosquitoes teach us this simply and easily by demonstrating to us that in a room, in the forest, or anywhere, we are almost powerless in front of them, and if we have insect repellent, we are powerful for a couple of hours justto return to our normal, ordinary, human state.Life is much more enjoyable when we live together and share together.
There is no need to show superiority over others. If weever have the idea that we are superior and invincible, certainly life will take the task of showing us the contrary. Just as Thomas Henry Huxley said: “Sit down before fact as a little child, be prepared to give up every preconceived notion, follow humbly wherever and to whatever abysses nature leads, or you shall learn nothing. I have only begun tolearn content and peace of mind since I have resolved at all risks to do this. ”Good things come when we are open to live! Go out and live life! Listen to the mosquitoes and their wise bzzzzzzz!
source: http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/6-life-lessons-mosquito-can-teach-you.html

Iamoilprince:
Nice one op! #dusting my cv...i MUST get that oil n gas job before 2nd quarter of the year!!!

yes my man go get it, am happy knowing that my article inspired you

Syphax:
Wonderful piece,I'm sure it won't make frontpage.


OP,please kindly include a Lion and other members of the Cat Family there because they spend time stalking the would be prey.

thank you for the observation

jummygo:
About to start cooking.

can i join u after the food is done?

this is what is in front of ne now:
tea and bread.
fura.
tuwo(double fire).

share yours:

the following are some signs of nature that tell you never to give up on your dream. what you need are,realistic target,consult expert in the field,good steps,don't think you cannot make it,because you are not from rich family.success is there to be claim by those who work for it, you are not too small and start now. and it doesnt have to be money that you are pursueing.this is applicable the achievement of anything.
MOSQUITOR:
mosquitor never give up,if they try to suck your blood,and you did not allow it they can wait patiently till you fall asleep.they also think that there is no amount of sacrifice that is too much to make in order to get what they want,they take alot of risk,sometime they dont go away,is either you kill it or they suck your blood.
this small but smart creature dont want us to be happy at night,they do all they can to make sure you did not sleep comfortably, if they did not bit you,they will disturb you with their buzzzzzzzzzz sound. And all that is in the process of getting what they want.
WATER:
Water is an amazing disruptor, materializing from thin air, it can torrent and push aside mountains, or it can patiently work at opening up tiny cracks in solid stone, freezing and expanding, thawing and flowing.
Water will always find its way, it will find the unseen cracks, and find ways through obstacles and even tear them down, as a tiny leak can bring down a mighty dam.
SUN:
have you ever heard of a day that sun didnt rise. sun is always there to produce,not only light but also,alot of things that we know and the ones that we dont. And it will continue to rise till end of time.

so:
work hard:
take risk:
when you are knocked down get up again and take the challenge,with a different strategy:
if you have been trying for long but no breakthrough, step back,look around, there are always loopholes, find them and use them to your favor.
you can add your:

$1b is okay for me

if given the power to change one thing,including the impossible, what are you going to change about past or the future?
i will change the future and make nigeria to be the most admired country in the world.

folamog:
Yeah right! Cos you have gone and come back, or you know someone who has?

i know you will either be a muslim or christian and its written in the bible and qur'an that there will be resurrection and judgement day.so you better be prepared.

MzNelly:
I suck my lollipop till it's completely gone.

A friend told me I was practicing for the future, whatever that means.

hahahaha
pls how old are you?

i just think that crunching sweet is a lack of patience. it is very hard to find someone that can suck sweet until it is completely gone.
do you suck or crunch sweet?

folamog:
This is the dumbest one today. Op you'd be dead nah, so how you go fit miss anything?

dont u know that there is lonely life after death and eventually resurrection?

as for me, the first thing i will miss is my family,followed by friends, the quality time we use to spend together.
interms of food i will miss.cool water,chicken and youghourt, i will also miss the fresh air,the way i use to see people on the street walking different ways.
drop yours.

toyeoye:
Nigeria will flourish!
Buhari will not go for second term
We shall soon get bored of olamides comedy rap style
A Muslim will never rule Isreal
Prince William will become king
Mayweather will not retire unbeaten
I will buy the latest Aston Martin

hmmmm gud predictions except for buharis presidency and muslims ruling

let me start:
Buhari will not disappoint us,
Nigeria will be among the world super powers,
the display of nudity by celebrities will increase and become a thing of competition among them,
America will lose its title as world no.1 super power,
ISIL may increase its territory,
we ill never have a clueless president like GEJ again,
Hillary Clinton may win US presidential election,
Nigeria may never divide,
we will have flying cars,
we will have self driving cars everywhere,
I will become the next world richest.

Add yours.

mkpakanaodogwu:
take the lead and i will follow

no me i will stay in maiduguri town and be telling you if there is any threat coming your way through my microscopic camera, just like will smith did to his boy in the film after earth

mkpakanaodogwu:
Depends on the tresure involved

the treasure is the girls location.

Xslaze3xd:
Am In for it guys....... Let's look for the Treasure (the gals)

are u sure u can confront shecaw and his boys?

OREMUSSANCTUS:
I hate "change"

change what?

suppose there is a treasure hunt that requires the most brilliant people to look for the location of chibok girls in sambisa forest,u are not to rescue them,just to find the location and inform the military.
you will be given anything you ask,guns,body shield, and anything necessary for you to succeed, but no soldiers will follow you.
20 participants, you will be taken there and left to figure it out by yourselves.
REWARD:
on the succesful completion of the mission, each will be given, manson in abuja,$1m, and a tour to five countries of your choice.

Colospor:
You can avoid beating by running as fast as your legs could carry you, and if you get tired in the leg, run with your hands cos the beatings you're gonna receive will be more than that of Judas.

cant stop laughing

lets assume the two of you are in a room,office or car and u start having misunderstanding,she then start screaming loud and asking for help,tearing her clothes,telling people that, he want to rape me.
how are you going to handle the situation, can u escape?

Hundreds of decomposed bodies including those of women and children were discovered by a government committee in Damasak, northern Borno State weekend.
The committee was set up by Governor Kashim Shettima to assess the level of destruction in towns and villages recovered from the insurgents.It has the responsibility to rebuild, fumigate and provide essential services tomake the settlememnts safe for displacedresidents to return.The victims were suspected to have been killed by Boko Haram insurgents as they fled the town following an onslaught by Chadian forces to recapture the town.Credible sources said decomposed bodies littered the streets while many others were discovered inside houses, shallow graves and rivers that have dried up on the onset of the dry season.The committee spent the weekend recovering and burying remains of the victims under the watchful eyes of Chadian troops who sacked the insurgents from Damasak some weeks ago.
Witnesses and government officials told Daily Trust that the insurgents carried outthe massacre during their reign of terror that lasted several months in the fishing community.Senator-elect Borno North Senatorial District, Alhaji Abukakar Kyari, said there was “large scale atrocity” committed by the insurgents in Damasak and other towns and villages in northern part of Borno State.However, Kyari denied suggestions that among the victims were some of the 500 children abducted by the militants a few months ago.It was said that the children were locked up in an Arabic school in Damasak and that they died of suffocation and hunger.Kyari said: “I have full knowledge of what the committee did in Damasak and the fact is that there was nowhere that bodiesof over 500 children was discovered.“Of course, many people have been killed but nobody or group brought all the dead bodies to one place.“ What really happened was that followingthe liberation of Damasak by Chadian and Nigerien forces and a visit by a committeethat we set up, we again sent our people there on Saturday (25th April) and they worked assiduously in recovering many dead bodies.“I cannot tell you the precise number of dead bodies but they are many. The people that went to Damasak divided themselves into various groups, recoveredthe bodies and buried them in various graves,” he said.Kyari said some bodies were recovered in Kareto and others in Damasak.He said preliminary investigations suggested that some of the fresh corpseswere those of insurgents killed by Chadianand Niger Republic troops.
Speaking in the same vein, the Principal Information Officer of the local government, Babagana Mustapha, said they had made videos and taken pictures of the atrocities committed by the insurgents in Damasak.“Based on the mandate given to us, we went to Damasak on Thursday after passing through parts of Yobe State and Diffa in Niger Republic.“We were ushered into the town by Chadian forces led by a General who has a Nigerien officer as his second in command.“Some troops escorted us to various places and we saw the level at which human beings were massacred. We saw corpses in Dutse, in Gashigar and in Damasak…they were many,” he said.“We were also informed that hundreds of decomposed bodies of Boko Haram insurgents were in the bushes. But the troops from the neighbouring countries said they had nothing to do with them; they said it was the responsibility of Nigerian government to bury the bodies.“But they assured us that we could feel free and go back to our dwellings whenever we wanted,” Mustapha said.On the discovery of 500 children in a school, Mustapha said, “I only heard of that story after we returned from our findings but honestly speaking, we didn’t see anything like that.”It would be recalled that in the past two months, more than 60 towns and villages that were hitherto occupied by the Boko Haram were liberated in at least 20 of the 27 local government areas of Borno State.
Damasak was liberated by Nigerien and Chadian forces in the second week of March.Few days after the liberation, the Chadian military high command took some journalists to Damasak to see things for themselves and interviewed some of the survivors.At the time, an unnamed military source told the international media that over 70 mostly beheaded bodies were found in a shallow grave near a bridge on the outskirts of the town.Similarly, the BBC Hausa Service and Reuters news agency reported that surviving residents of Damasak said about500 children had been kidnapped by the Boko Haram.Some of the parents said the children were abducted when the Boko Haram tookover the town during their territorial conquest in parts of the state.However, both the Nigerian and Chadian forces refuted the stories.A resident of Damasak who is now in Maiduguri but does not want his name mentioned called for elaborate investigation into the story about the missing children.“We strongly believe that the nearly 500 children found in the school in Damasak were those abducted by the Boko Haram during their occupation of the town and adjoining villages.“They must be the ones killed when troops from the neighbouring countries were approaching to reclaim the town. Remember that both the Chadian and Nigerian military denied the report of the kidnap after they liberated the town.“But look at what happened now…all the children were found dead in a school and though we are not experts, it is evident that they died because of suffocation, thirst and hunger. There was no ventilation in the classes, nothing, no medication,” he said.

http://www.dailytrust.com.ng/daily/top-stories/53157-hundreds-of-decomposed-bodies-found-in-borno

sonikstargirl:
if I hear

have u ever seen a grown man crying in public

agarawu23:
though nothing romantic here



but we shld pray we don't face challenges that will make us shed tears.

what type of challenge will make u shed tears?

real men dont cry:
it will look strange for a grown man to cry, especially in public, there were instances where tears were about to roll down my cheek, but i had to hold it. cos some will look at you as a weak somebody nd some will even abuse you. so i think i agree with the phrase. what d u think?

counting .......33days to go may 29, the judgement day for corrupt nigerian politicians