₦airaland Forum

There was a Bus Conductor, who was Very Rude to his passengers. One day, a Beautiful Young Girl, of around 18 Years, tried to board the bus, but he didn't stop the bus. Unfortunately, the beautiful young girl came under the bus and died on the spot. Angry passengers took the conductor to the police station, who in turn took him to the court. The Judge was not at all impressed with him and gave him capital punishment. He was taken to the electrocution chamber. There was a single chair in the center of the room. The conductor was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him. But, to everyone's amazement, he survived. The judge decided to set him free, and he returned to his profession. . . . . A couple of months later, an elderly gentleman tried to board the bus. This time the Bus conductor, remembering his earlier experience stopped the bus. Unfortunately, the elderly gentleman slipped and died due to his injuries. The conductor was taken to the police station and then to the court, to the same judge. Though, he haven't done anything wrong, but considering his past record the judge decided to set an example and gave him capital punishment. The Bus conductor was again taken to the same electrocution chamber where there was a single chair in the center of the room. He was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him. This time he died instantly.....!!!!! . . The question is why didn't he die on the first occasion..?? but, died instantly the second time....?? . . . . . Okay........ here is the Answer............ During the first time The Conductor was a Bad Conductor, therefore electricity didn't pass through him. But, during the second time, he was a Good Conductor, so electricity passed through him freely and he died !!!! PHYSICS NEVER GO WRONG....

nairalanders what's ur take?

CAN YOU TAKE YOUR BATH IN PUBLIC FOR TEN MILLION DOLLARS?.

as for me,..i wont jst bath naked alone..i will ivite bbc, CNN, aljeezera..e.t.c..to come witness d 10mil dollars bath show..i might even volunteer to bath more days naked..

for dis kind recession nd i see dat kind opportunity, u say make i no baff? infact thunder ll fire any body dat ll stand on my way..who my covering of clothes to Epp..e never even help me sef wer dey wear am..

Lol..

bro is it for real?..how much is it to subcribe?...because thunder will fire u. if ur trya scam pple..

Nbote:
Jus read if from anoda news source online... But some ppl jus don't learn.. Of all d places to urinate its close to a mosque he chose to do it knowing fully well how extreme these ppl can b about such things. I'm not in any way lauding d actions of d worshippers but some of us need to learn to use our head in avoiding confrontations dat would lead to such knowing fully well dat if anything happens dey'll walk free and u'll bear d loss whether u like it or not.

True talk man!..buh u never know if there was no other place good for urianting than dat gutter close to d mosque..of course u know dats abuja. nd u cannot jst pee any where..truth be told, dis folks are very useless..nd d federal government needs to profer a solution now..or dis will continue..

i have never seen a country more useless than nigeria..because of dis sycophants call moslims..very useless pple..who have no human sympathy..and whenever there kill a christian if d youth want to retaliate, d police are quick to camp d situation..
im jst wondering where we are heading to as a nation..truth be told, we jst need to separate..so dat peace can reign..

soberdrunk:
Nah today person dey promise and fail, my guy don pledge 3million 4 church just to get one girl attention, him and the pastor nearly throw blow when he reach time to collect, baba nor even get 100k. Moral of the story----Showbiz nah showbiz!!

Lols!!! guy u no get chills oo

Unemployed graduates in the country have expressed anger and disappointment with the secret recruitments carried out by government agencies since the All Progressives Congress came to power in 2015 , asking the Acting President, Prof. Yemi Osinbajo to reverse them .
The unemployed youths spoke to
Saturday PUNCH under the aegis of the Unemployed Graduates of Nigeria , Association of Nigerian Graduates Against Unemployment and the Youths Arise against Unemployment and Poverty.
They said it was a betrayal of trust for a government that enjoyed massive support and goodwill from Nigerians , including unemployed youths , to allow back - door employment for children of politically powerful individuals while majority of Nigerians continue to live in abject penury.
Under the government of President Muhammadu Buhari , several agencies have engaged in secret recruitments of employees as against advertising vacancies in line with the provisions of the law and federal character.
Such agencies that have engaged in secret recruitments in the last two years include the Central Bank of Nigeria , Federal Inland Revenue Service, Nigeria Security and Civil Defence Corps and the Nigerian Prisons Service .
Investigations by The PUNCH in December 2016 had revealed that the authorities of the NSCDC had enlisted about 100 candidates who were relatives, wards and protégés of politicians and influential personalities from the northern part of the country into the service .
The CBN had similarly given plum jobs to relatives or wards of people who are politically connected with the government.
FIRS had in 2016 also employed 349 new employees without any public advertisement of vacancies just as the NPS admitted to the House of Representatives Committee on Public Petitions during a public hearing that it had recruited 605 persons without placing any public advertisement.
The youth therefore called on the Acting President , Prof. Yemi Osinbajo, to toe the line of honour based on the promise of change made to Nigerians by this government and reverse the irregular recruitments and also punish heads of the affected government agencies.
The Convener, UGN , Michael Odor , who described the irregular recruitments as a deliberate ploy by the ruling elite to continue to impoverish the masses, called for the reversal of the recruitments and punishment of the heads of the agencies found culpable .
He said, “Such recruitments are wrong and the actions have inflicted injury in the hearts of many Nigerian youths . Acting President Osinbajo has to reverse all the recruitments and let everyone that is interested apply afresh .
“He should also sanction the heads of agencies found to have carried out such recruitments because it is important to be accountable to Nigerians .
“It is a deliberate attempt by the elite to continue to put the masses in a position of constant need so that they can always lure the poor with money and use them whenever they want . We are sitting on a keg of gunpowder. ”
Similarly, National Public Relations Officer, Association of Nigerian Graduates Against Unemployment, Mr . Oni Kehinde, called for sanctions against heads of affected agencies, saying government “ must deal with them for the illegal recruitments .”
Kehinde described the implications of the irregular recruitments as grave for the country and its struggling economy , adding that “such recruitments are meant for some selected few connected to the ruling cabal .”
He said, “Osinbajo should revisit and reverse all the recruitments done by the agencies. A common man should be able to apply and stand an equal chance with everyone else to get the job as long as he has the required qualifications. It is obvious that the recruitments the agencies had done under this government are not meant for the masses .
“I have not seen the child of a pepper seller gain employment in any of these government agencies. The implication is bad for our economy because they are giving jobs to people who will resume work late because they know they are cousins or wards of ministers , so they are only loyal to their uncles and not the country.
“When it comes to employment and empowerment, this government will score less than one per cent when you consider what it promised us .”
Public Relations Officer, Youths Arise Against Unemployment and Poverty, Mr . John Ovie , also called for the “punishment of all those involved in the illegal recruitments in government agencies. ”
Ovie said if the government failed to reverse the recruitments , it would totally fail Nigerians , whom it had promised positive change in the way the government was being run.
“This government promised Nigerians change when it came in but it appears that it is worse than the previous ones . Even common recruitments, this government cannot make them transparent .
“With its mantra of change , we ought to have seen the change from Day 1 , but clearly , it has all been lies ,” he said.
A graduate of Accounting from Olabisi Onabanjo University , Ogun State, Adebimpe Olukayode , 26 , who had been looking for job since 2013 , also urged the Federal Government to sack the heads of agencies where such recruitments took place .
She said, “Today’s political leaders are the ones taking corruption to another level . They said the change should start from us , yet they are not walking their talk. Why should any of them fill those agencies with their children?
“Many of us struggled throughout school, their children never did , yet they would still place them at a more advantageous position than us . There should be fairness in recruitment in government agencies.
“I want to plead with Acting President Osinbajo to ask the agencies to reverse the shoddy recruitment; it’s not fair . It ’s unjust ; it’s criminal . As a matter of fact, the Acting President should also sack the heads of the agencies involved in illegal recruitments . Or at least , he should penalise them.”
Olukayode’ s thoughts were echoed by a Biochemistry graduate of the University of Lagos , Isaac Chibuike , 32 , who also called on the Federal Government to “quickly ” reverse the shoddy employment processes .
He said, “It was unjust for the agencies to have filled their vacancies with the children of the political elite . They said the previous administration was corrupt. Is what they did righteousness?
“It is high time corruption was dealt with at every level. I think Acting President Osinbajo could play a major role here . He and Buhari said they would fight corruption to a standstill; they should not just stop at those who looted funds; they should continue from here .
“For starters , let the Federal Government reverse the recruitment and then let an investigative panel be set up to look into those who spearheaded the recruitment processes . Anyone found guilty should be fired. Let every recruitment process be open to all , irrespective of our class in the society.”
For Kazeem Fawole, 32 , who has been looking for a job for the past seven years , making recruitments open in Federal Government agencies would have ensured a level -playing field for all graduates .
The Ladoke Akintola University of Technology graduate also called on the Acting President to reverse the shoddy recruitments and fire the heads of agencies responsible .
He said, “ Some of us graduates were sidelined in all the recruitments . I think it would be wrong to be preaching against corruption when some political leaders are practising it.
“I think Osinbajo could step up and fight corruption from within. He should mandate all the agencies to reverse the shoddy recruitments that took place and punish the agencies’ heads. That ’s how we will know that the government is serious about fighting corruption.”
SERAP, CACOL back calls
In the same vein , Executive Director, Socio - Economic Rights and Accountability Project , Mr . Adetokunbo Mumuni, said “whatever is done that is contrary to due process , transparency and the right of Nigerians to know what happens in any government establishment cannot stand and must be reversed . ”
He said, “ When recruitments are done through the back - door , the most likely scenario will be that Nigerians in their multitude will be shortchanged abundantly and that should not be so in a democracy.
“If we voted for a government, it means it is by the power of majority of the people that the government came into existence to exercise governmental powers and the way it must exercise the powers must be in the interest of the majority of the people .
“A situation where people are employed clandestinely, contrary to the demand of transparency and accountability cannot be allowed. It is in that regard that we align with the view that all the recruitments must be reversed and the heads of agencies that engaged in clandestine methods should be sanctioned .”
Like SERAP, the Centre for Anti-Corruption and Open Leadership also described the secret recruitments as tantamount to treason, saying they were “inequitable and not in accordance with the principles of public good. ”
Executive Chairman, CACOL, Mr . Debo Adeniran , said, “There should be equal opportunities for everybody to have access to anything that will benefit the citizenry .
“Doing recruitments secretly means there is preferential treatment, which is not allowed under the Nigerian Constitution because everybody is equal before the law .
“And once the provision of the law is not followed , it means it is an illegal exercise . Not only should such recruitments be null and void and of no effect, those who made it possible for certain people to be secretly recruited should be punished because it is as good as a conspiracy against the citizenry . It is almost as bad as committing treason. ”
However, a Senior Advocate of Nigeria , Mr . Femi Falana (SAN), said graduates who feel sidelined by such recruitments could seek redress in court, adding that “government recruitments are required to fulfil the position of the law . ”

source: http://punchng.com/unemployed-graduates-angry-ask-osinbajo-to-reverse-secret-recruitments/

sweetheart are u sure he is doing it because he loves doing it?...

u said he shud ave worked as a bar attendant..
hmmm didn't u hear wen d op said he's searching for a job nd found none..or been a bar attendant, is it not a job?..call him nd give him d job attendant job na nd see weda he ll not collect..

u said he shud ave looked for a business nd do..
hmmm how does one get to start a business is it not wit money?...d truth is for every tin u aspire to be, if d means is not available , then u need to create one for urself..

to me i feel he's doing wat he's doing to raise money nd start a life like u said..maybe starting a business..or whatever is in his mind..he isn't jst doing it for fun..neither is it sweeting him to do so..
as u can see from d pic, he even covered his face wit a mask..or painted his face..whatever..

it none of ma business

The Federal Government has declared Monday , May 29 , 2017 as a public holiday to celebrate the 2017 Democracy Day .
The Minister of Interior , Lt . Gen . Abdulrahman Dambazau (retd .), in a statement on Thursday in Abuja congratulated Nigerians for witnessing yet another Democracy Day which marked the second anniversary of President Muhammadu Buhari ’ s government .
Dambazau in the statement by the Director Overseeing the Permanent Secretary ’s Office , Alhaji Muhammadu Maccido , assured Nigerians of the government’s continued efforts towards guaranteeing security, revitalising the economy and tackling corruption.
source: http://punchng.com/fg-declares-monday-public-holiday-6/

Eniola Akinkuotu , Abuja
Former President Olusegun Obasanjo has called on the Federal Government to negotiate with those agitating for the creation of a Biafran republic out of the current set- up in Nigeria .
Obasanjo said this at an event , tagged ‘Memory and Nation Building: Biafra 50 years later ’, which held in Abuja on Thursday The event was held to commemorate 50 years of the declaration of an independent state of Biafra by the late Dim Chukwuemeka Ojukwu on May 30 , 1967 .
Obasanjo as the Commander , Third Marine Commando Division , was the military officer who accepted the surrender of the Biafran forces on January 12 , 1970 , after three years of war.
However, the former President said the agitation for Biafra was like a woman complaining constantly about her marriage and threatening to file for a divorce against her husband.
Obasanjo said in such a situation , the husband must pet and “massage” his wife to make her feel loved .
He stated , “ I believe that the point must be clear . Nigeria must be loved and we must treat Nigeria as we treat love affairs . It must be massaged . Nigeria must be massaged by all of us .
“It is like a love affair . If in a house with a husband and a wife and the wife says ‘ I am fed up , I am going ’ and every day, that is the song you hear , you will soon get fed up yourself as the husband and you will say , ‘ if you want to go, you can go ’.
“But if there is any misunderstanding and you resolve it, and you find a solution , you will live together almost forever . I believe there is no substitute for holding Nigeria and massaging it as you massage love. There is no alternative and I will say we should even appeal.
“If anybody says he wants to go , it is not that you will say ‘you can go if you want to go’. Don ’t go ! There is enough cake for each and every one of us . If what you are asking for is more of the cake , then ask for it in a way that is pleasant, not in a way that will make others feel you are not entitled to what you are asking for .”
Recalling his role in the Nigerian Civil War , Obasanjo said it was never the plan of the Nigerian government to exterminate the Igbo .
He explained that everything that the federal troops did was in a bid to unite the country .
Obasanjo added, “ We had in our pocket the Geneva convention to guide us . In addition to that , we had a special code of conduct. Third, we had foreign observers . We had people who were like umpires.
“If it was a war to exterminate and we had no reconciliation in mind , what would foreign observers be doing? The foreign observers reported periodically and even had powers to investigate any allegation and they did .”
Also speaking at the event , acting President Yemi Osinbajo said Nigerians must continue to strive for the unity of the nation .
While delivering his speech , titled ‘Greater together than apart ’, Osinbajo noted that the civil war was a stain on the history of Nigeria .
He, however , said it would be foolish if Nigerians passed through such a thing again.
The acting President stated , “ Indeed the saying ‘experience is the best teacher’ is incomplete. The full statement of that Welsh adage is that experience is the best teacher for a fool. History is a better and kinder teacher.”
Osinbajo said the demand for secession was not exclusive to Nigeria but was also present in many western countries including the United Kingdom and the United States.
He, however , stated that the answer to the problems of Nigeria goes beyond secession .
The acting President said the diversity in Nigeria should be seen as a blessing because it offered manifold opportunities for greatness .
Osinbajo added, “The most successful nations of the world are those who do not fall into the lure of separation but who through thick and thin forge unity in diversity. Nigeria is no different . We are not two or three but more of 300 ethnic groups between the same geographical space , presented with a great opportunity to combine all of our strengths into a nation that is truly more than the sum of its parts. ”
He said Nigerians should never shy away from discussing the terms of our unity because debate was an essential aspect of democracy.
The acting President added, “I fully believe that Nigerians should exercise , to the fullest extent , the right to discuss and debate the terms of our existence. Debates and disagreements are fundamental aspects of democracy. ”
The President of Igbo socio- cultural group, Ohanaeze Ndigbo, Chief Nnia Nwodo , said the political system was jaundiced and hindering proper development, adding that with fiscal autonomy , every state in Nigeria would develop faster .
Nwodo said, “Before the war, national unity was the norm . A Biafran was a member of Northern Nigeria House of Chiefs . Biafrans lived freely and invested in all parts of Nigeria .
“In Lagos, Dr Azikiwe was elected leader of Government Business . Mbonu Ojike was elected Deputy Speaker . In Enugu, Alhaji Umoru Altine, a Fulani man , was elected Mayor of Enugu . Mr . Willoughby , a Yoruba man , was Accountant -General .”
source: http://punchng.com/obasanjo-calls-for-negotiation-on-biafran-agitation/

WHO IS A SLAYER?
I have heard so much about this"Slayqueens" . And have seen a lot of females call themselves SLAYERS and SLAY QUEENS. And I ask, Have you ever cared to know who is a slayer? What does it really mean? Where does it orginate from?Who's a Slay queen? What are the qualities of a Slay queen? What are the morphological features, and even behavioural patterns of a Slay queen? All these and many more questions can be associated with the concept of Slay-Queens!
The Oxford Advanced Learner's Dictionary, 8th edition defines "slay" as "an act to kill somebody or destroy something in a war or a fight"(violence). And it's synonyms are: murder, ruin, assassinate , slaughter butcher etc. Slayers are also young human females chosen by fate and bestowed with MYSTICAL POWERS that ORIGINATED from an ANCIENT DEMON.Being infused with the essence of a Shadow demon grants them some abilities like super human strength, prophetic dreaming etc. So a slayer is a person who slays. Therefore, literally, a slay queen is a female/lady who has the intent to kill, ruin, assassinate a person or destroy a kingdom or an independent state or also may have this"mystical powers".The way or means through which such can be achieved is best known to her... Some have said it might be through fashion, or exposure of parts of her body or living a clandestine lifestyle or impressing you greatly.
Just as King Ahab was made miserable by Queen Jezebel and Samson at Delilah's hands ( SLAY QUEENS). No man would like to be slain by the slayer. But today on social media a SLAYER sounds more like a lady who looks PERFECT or BEAUTIFUL. Really? Is it so? Ladies if you do not have this attributes like being a killer, destroyer or having super human powers or( INFORMALLY) you do not also impress people GREATLY etc than you are not a SLAYER. ARGEED?

op i will advice u to stop misleading d public wit fallacious information..wen there d pope met wit trump nd shook hands, d pope was all smiling...

ok why didn't u show us wen d pope nd trump shook hands? jst like dat of obama...u shud ave showed a similar picture wit dat of obama..nd stop been who u are..

why nairaland come de hide thier faces sef..go to linda ikeja blog now..u will see dis same news..with their clear faces..

btw, Today I learnt that you can't spell Advertisement without SEMEN between the TITS.
We learn everyday

oga..abeg try nd borrow sense na..if u dont have one..d 3 year kid who's a dj in south africa, has parents, nd of course if u ave research abt d lad very well, u ll know dat his parents are rich.. d guy lacks nothing.. but here, we are talking about street kids wit no parents..nd of course u dont expect me to brief u on how d state of d country is..u know dat very well..


if u who is talking, wit parents oo nd i guess u went to school..has nothing offer..then how much more d street kids?..

mtcheww

shall we?

ok shall we?

LubeyNaijaBlog:
Big Brother Naija winner, Efe Ejeba looked dapper as he graced the cover of This Day Style magazine.

http://www.lubeynaija.com/2017/05/bbnaija-efe-looks-dapper-on-cover-of.html?m=1

from grass to grace..keep going higher

thats not true sir..everything said in d bible, are things dat happened in d past..and of course yes there are real..

there are not illusional, imaginary or folks tales..these are even that took place in d past..

sonmvayina:
The best answer so far..

in those men cud do the imposible..
like sampson killing a lion wit his bare hands
david even b4 killing goliath, use to kill bears dat come after his sheeps..
those days, men cud do crazy tins..by d help of God..
and also remember d mind is very powerful..any tin d mind can conceive, it can achieve
talkless of wen men of like minds come 2geda in unity jst to achieve an aim
my brother it ll only take God to stop them.. imagine technologies today founded by single men..them bill gates, zukerberg e.t.c..

God bless u so much sir..ur kind gesture shall be remembered..more power to ur elbows..

The way people took BBNaija seriously I thought Jamb was going to ask questions on it.
Something like:
Efe won BBNaija based on _________
(A) Linguistics (B) Legal Right (C) Logistics (D) None of the above

broke guys be like

for real!!

3 WAYS To CATCH A TIGER. . . 1- Newton's Method = Allow the tiger to catch you & catch the Tiger. 2- Einstein's Method = Chase the tiger until it becomes tired, then catch it. 3- Police Method = Catch a cat and beat it until it accepts its a tiger.

regina daniels..is been 16 years since 2015.. hmmmmm!

Bro i wont lie..u are very satanic..very very devilish..nd highly useless for calling some ones mom a witch..u are doom for life

NwaObinkita:

His mom looks so stubborn now,

It is obvious she is a witch
And her witchcraft is making I-Go-Dye successful

Bro i wont lie..u are very satanic..very very devilish..nd highly useless for calling some ones mom a witch..u are doom for life..

NwaObinkita:

His mom looks so stubborn now,

It is obvious she is a witch
And her witchcraft is making I-Go-Dye successful

Bro i wont lie..u are very satanic..very very devilish..nd highly useless for calling some ones mom a witch..