₦airaland Forum

Got this roaming on facebook this morning, havve to copy paste

Mary Modupe
Attention! Attention!! Attention!!!

We, the members of Girlfriends Association of
Nigeria(GAN) have observed that our
Boyfriends have embarked on the strike
proposed by the Boyfriends Association of
Nigeria(BAN). Our Boyfriends have
relinguished their responsibilitie s, a childish
move.
It is highly regrettable that our cherished and
beloved Boyfriends, people who will suffered
for, people who will sacrificed for.....have
decided to follow this path.
Some of our boyfriends have cancelled their
Traditional marriages and introductions,
Some of our Boyfriends have come up with
bizarre excuses such as "I am building a
house in the village", "I am the sole sponsor
to my sister's wedding", "I want to buy a car
for my Mum", "I bought some plots of Land"
e.t.c.
For Chrissakes, we are not stopping you guys
from spending on your Families.
You can't slap your child and expect Her not
to cry. Our boyfriends have slapped Us and
we are crying.

An emergency meeting was held today at
High-Level Hotel, Mubi, Adamawa state...under
tight security.

The following resolutions were reached with
simple majority;
1)-That since our boyfriends have
relinguished their responsibilitie s, we have
entered a contractual agreement with the
Sugar Daddies Association of Nigeria(SUDAN)
2)-That the agreement will last till June 2013.
3)-That since most of our boyfriends are
students and poor, members of SUDAN have
promised to spoil us with money. They said
houses and expensive cars will be presented
as gifts this Yuletide period.
4)-That since Sugar Daddies are apparent lazy
in bed, as they only prefer Blowjobs and Cow-
girl style...it is highly preferable to our
boyfriends who loves blowjobs, doggy,
scissor, standing, mosquito, and coconut
styles.
5)-That we have observed that some of the
members of SUDAN are divorcees, and some
members of GAN may buy the idea of getting
married to some Sugar Daddies.
6)-That the President of GAN should plead
with our Mothers, the Sugar Mummies
Association of Nigeria(SUMAN) to cut all forms
of relationship with some of our estranged
boyfriends.
7)-That during this agreement with SUDAN,
we will halt all forms of communication with
our boyfriends.
-That the B.A.N is given 48hours to stop
their purported strike, and resume full
boyfriend responsibilitie s.
9)-That if our boyfriends fail to reply within
the said time, we will start accepting gifts
from Sugar Daddies and cooperating with
them.
10)-That a Memorandum of Understanding
(MOU) calling to an end of the strike, be duly
signed by our Legal adviser and the President
of B.A.N, and also made public.
11)-That since it has been proven that the
illness, Congi-nitis(lac k of sex) leads to loss of
memory and brain damage, we assumed that
the decision of BAN to embark on a two-
month strike was ill-advised.

Thanks.

Signed:
Engr. Cynthia Chukwuemeka
(Legal Adviser)

LesbianBoy: Adorable my foot!! After snatching someone's husband RUBBISH!!! See her UGLY face sef *spits*

what your business has to do with it, she is very beautiful, nothing like snatch in dictionary of relationship, dem break up simply and stop pointing finger with your illegal coconut head and sparking slit on those greater than you on earth, it is call jealousy

rokiatu: If you have nothing better to say please say nothing.

that's why I say nothing concerned, if it is odunnu, I would have give a reasonable advice but as for you, what you did to me, you will surely do to oothers, so nothing concern me

Nothing concern me

Work hard,make more money then you can get more girls to your dick

Hopefully I will be deported to USA of america if I lose nigeria citizenship

Ifilinwa: I look better dan dem wif or wifawt make up sef, @op, wait, make I upload am

are you looking for husband or customer to service ur sawuso, who ask u for uploading?v

comechop: why all the immature hate against PES lovers? Can't one like just PES and not the other. You FIFA lovers need to STFU and just enjoy the da.mn game. I prefer PES cos of the superb tactical freedom it allows me. To each his own.

nigger, pes lost it all, do make shit talk here or I kick ur asshole niggger

boron10: If south-west Nigeria was a country, the heading would have been 90% of south-west Nigerian population defecate in public. Yoruba people too dirty. Na them cause this one

if shiiit hold your anus, u know go find better corner deremove the kpetus wey dey block ur anus hole and since igbo land full of forest, oyinbo no dey bother to go tthere

badesco: If the guy is found to be culpable then he should be made to face the music.

he has been facing musics for long or did you mean face his offence, beef people

I thank God,I quit ciggarate,jedi-smoke,alomo,sepe,brandy,ori-maluu and agamasinga but before I quit them, I slept in hospital for 2 dayss after I drank one with weed mix inside, doctor my blood was fill with acohol, and he said if I didn't stop, I may have hole in my heart, I only drink star now or small stout oncce in a while

donmeric: DATS UR BIZ.

Lick my ANUS

Retaliate

Human task is unlimited, no matter how you try to fulfil the task, you will always have something left you couldn't remember to fulfil till the last hour calling.
Like our leaders will say
1.I wish I never embezzled money
2.I wish my children could learn from greedily and split the cash I kept illegally for them to the nation
3.I wish I was given another chance so I could correct my mistake and lead the people right
4.I wish I never become a president maybe I wouldn't have mislead 150 millions heads

Akpors and johnny went for an interview for employment. johnny was the first to enter the interviewing office.. (the manager asking johnny questions).

Manager: who was the first millitary head of state in Nigeria..
Johnny: General Aguyi Ironsi..
Manager: when was the North and southern protectorate in Nigeria Almagamated. . Johnny: 1914.. Manager. Dat is gud of you..

Question no 3, is it true that the cure for hiv/ aids is discovered.. Johnny: eehm.. yes but not scientifically proven...
Manager: good way of answering questions, pls can you wait for us outside and we will attend to you later... (when johnny went outside akpors asked him)..

Akpors: johnny, what are the questions and please tell me the answers??..
(as johnny was about to tell akpors the questions and answer, the manager shouted from inside `NEXT'..
Akpors then said to Johnny)..

Akpors. Ok tell me only the answers..
Johnny: answer to
number 1 is: General Aguyi Ironsi,
number 2 is=1914,
number 3 is=yes but not scientifically proven

(mumu Akpors got to d interview, after exchanging greetings, d manager told him to sit down)

manager. Please sir, What is ur name?
Akpors : General Aguyi Ironsi
(manager became confused)
Manager. Please what year where you born?
Akpors: 1914
Manager: (angrily, he shouted at Akpors)!! are u mad?!!!
Akpors: Yes, but not scientifically proven.

CONVERSATION BETWEEN A GIRL AND THE FATHER.

Ekaitte: daddy, u remember telin me dat, when a man get ontop of me, he is digracing my family?

FATHER: yeah, gud girl, u remember tinz...so continue

Ekaitte: Last nyt when i went 2 Akpors h0use.

He tried getting ontop of me while on d bed, bt i refused

Father: That's my girl. I knw u will neva disappoint me, so wat happened next?

Ekaitte: I got ontop of him instead, and i disgraced his family

Father: OMG... (father collapses)

Omo, police don upgrade oOh, dis na d call center numba 112...
There was a robbery in my neighbour's house and I called them... next thing I heard was .
Welcome to Nigeria Police Emergency Center.. for English press. 1, for Igbo press 2, for Yoruba press 3.
Then I pressed 1... then another voice came up....For car accident press 1, for armed robbery press 2, for boko haram please hang up....
Den I
pressed 2, anoda voice came up....
If they're with knives press 1, pistols press 2, AK 47 press 3, machine guns press 4, bomb press 5, all of the above press 6...
Then i checked and saw they were with all of them then I pressed 6... anoda voice came up sayin....
Hmmmm...! My brother, if ur brother dey police u go gree make him come?

Akpors got 2 school on monday morning and d Teacher Asked: why did u come
late 2 school?

Akpors: "one man lost #1,000 Note at d bus stop.

Teacher: oooooooh dat's Gud of u, were
u helping him 2 luk 4 d money?

Akpors: nooooo!!! I DEY CRAZE

Na me stand on top of d money..........
Since.......... .!!!