emmysexxy:
Good evening room.I was banned reasons for telling what I know.I wonder why I was unbanned again.I have been receiving texts from ppl on my mail insulting me and my family well its all good.God knows and see all things.dj I believe your miracle is on d way.ho ever suggested they unbann me thanks.cause d whole of today I felt like a lepper.I guess I won't be a problem anymore

Emmy, God knows you had no evil intention, AND THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS. It is well...(((hugs)))

Caracta:


Yes I had to. Quite necessary. It won't stop me from moving on.

Thanks for pointing that out.

Again...moving on...

We are talking "life", people are talking "feelings" and "hormones"...it is well...this world is a temporary phase and rite of passage for ALL anyway...it is indeed well with our mortal souls as the Lord has taught us to say...

Caracta:
@mynd44, don't be discouraged. It happens. It's expected. I felt that way too at a point. It takes one that faces the REAL situation to understand.

Gboliwe even mentioned that everyone has failed except her. Still waiting for her success story. Perhaps she can come over here to be at his bed side everyday and attend to his needs and demands. Since we have failed, why not just let the successful ones take over?

The only reason I'm still here is because TEHN is involved and I was one of those that called for them. I'm more comfortable with my offline role. And like I told DJ himself, I'll always stand by him. I remember when we wanted to move him from Eruwa, a team was set up and everyone was posting and mentioning a particular hospital. Even the team members were all clamouring for this hospital suggested by a Nairalander who claimed he had gone there and made arrangements. We set up an ambulance and just before the trip, I had this urge to call the hospital and be double sure. I called and they told me no space.

And I asked myself, what if I didn't call?We would have moved a patient in ambulance to a hospital and get turned back. So we had to start looking for hospital all over Lagos again. Funny. See, it's easy for people to type away and pass blames.

I am not even discouraged...just wish some people could be on ground and see things for themselves.

All in all...moving on.

Caracta:
@emmysexxy, I don't know if you saw DJ last year especially with the bloated stomach. I don't know if you physically saw the initial shape he was in. Nobody would see him and not feel for him. Maybe you saw him for the first time and thus the surprise. I don't know what you saw or what prompted whatever you said.

I've sent 4 mails with no reply from you.

I don't know the info you are holding back.

If you are right, you don't need to be intimidated by anyone here. But every word on sensitive issues should be laced with wisdom. And no, it wasn't what you said that prompted the update...contrary to what many believe in.

You probably don't know the damage you have done already. Whatever rocks your boat. We can go on and on about what you said and how you could have said it...but it doesn't matter now.

You are a medical student yet you made such statement. Tomorrow is monday. You promised to visit and give us updates. Please don't forget to visit your neighbour, talk to his doctors, and if it's not against the ethics of your profession, give us updates. You seem to be the messiah many would prefer to hear from. So please do the needful. Thanks sweetheart.

After posting "MOVING ON", you came back to post "this"

Over to you God

At the end of the day this is still about "one" person, so anyone that notices any anomaly or concern should be free to express themselves without fear of attacks...and if their post comes across as crude, learn to correct in love and if possible help them rephrase the post in what you feel is a presentable manner...after all God did not create anyone perfect hence reason Matt 5:48 states we should "strive" to be perfect as He is perfect...

emmysexxy:
Goodmorning all in as much as most of you have been insulting me for saying the little truth I know I promise not to say anything more.but believe me I have not lied in anyway.what I told you guys was what I saw.am a medical student and I school in jos.that's why you saw jos as my location.that location has always been there.I update whn am in a different state.well that said I never said dj had two weeks to live.I said we had to act fast before two weeks cause of what I saw.all I want is for us to join hands and do something fast for dj.I pray for him everyday and my parents do same.so please stop judging me when you don't even know me.to what ends will I gain from lieing.that said I will keep watching and praying from the side like I have always done.@babyosisi,caracter,charcover,gboliwe,ophieus ,busybody,olu4life and even idowu well done.and TEHN more grease to your elbow.[color=#770077][/color]

Hey dear, you ain't the first that has been attacked and wouldn't be the last, so don't let anything stop you from keeping it real, because when you log off from your computer, to run away from the "aruwo oja", only you would still be left alone with your gnawing, raging conscience that would haunt you forever...I was in this same situation a few years back on this same Nairaland, she passed on, and if we can turn back the hands of time, I will stand my ground and speak my mind...


God knows you mean well for DJ and that's all that matters, so ignore all the insults on you and your family...human beings will always be human...

May God save people from this destructive thing called EGO...at this critical stage all that is still cared about is reputation!!! Hell is definitely currently rejoicing in glee at these antics...


***shuddering***

aisha2:


Thank you busybody you have said it all, you read and digested it well.
I really hope this man gets the help he needs. One key focus of an abuser is to alienate you from your family which she has done.

Am sure she wants him to sell off every bit of his inheritance, finish it and leave him koboless before she dumps him.

Just imagine how the response would have been if a woman said her husband shuts down all her business ideas, doesn't allow her plan with her family, beats her and her kids.

Men get abused too oh

This felt like a typical case whereby you tell him to man up, but your posts put things into perspectives for us...and now it's glaring what she is doing

rman:
@aisha2 and busybody2 God bless you ladies for seeing it for what it really is.

For me, the man has done nothing wrong.

She throws a tantrum and blocks him when he wants to invest in "buying" more land, yet sees nothing wrong in him "selling" his lands and handing a chunk of the money to her, hmmm...This wife na confirmed enemy-of-progress, sorry to say...

Coldplay007:


So you guys have been planning surgery for someone already diagnosed with stage 4 cancer?

Huh, pardon

All I have been saying since day one (Nov 12th) is that Luth result that was uploaded confirmed he has Malignant ascites...and all we are still discussing is diagnosis, not treatment...so I don't understand your post at all!!

aisha2:


Why why why? Now I will spend the whole day in tears. This is sad, thugs were there abusing and shouting people down, then silence then this. Hmmmmmm

A truckload of (((hugs))) to you Aisha2 and Babyosisi/Babymama...please console yourselves with the fact that DJ's life, like everyone else is in God's hands...


@Colosus2, your type is rare...you give people hope, you will go very far in life...

Life as we know it......fleeting, transient, ephemeral...it is well

MadCow1:



GOING to India would not have meant he would have found a cure there.
Getting him a passport was indeed discussed, but the logistics of it also proved a little difficult at the time.
I honestly believe that TeHN got involved in this case a little too late. I don't believe that it took this short period for his situation to climb from stage 1 to 4. This is a case of poor diagonosis that has led to this point. Maybe if at the initial stages he got good medical attention that detected his true ailment, it would have been easy to combat then.

I say we explore all options available to us and see how best we can help.
There is no point stewing over what could have been as that would lead us nowhere.
This is where we find ourselves today, this is the situation we are faced with, now let's figure out the best way to proceed.

Thanks to everyone who has been a part of this cause in any form. This may not be the result we hoped for when we started, but I still see this as progress, because we seem to be finally discovering the cause of his ailment. And it's only when we know the cause of the ailment, that we can actually treat the ailment.

I pray we get some good news from the second doctor..

@Babyosisi, you are right it is in God's capable hands...

Hmmm

Babymama1:


There is now an update finally stage 4 cancer
You see am

Something LUTH Doctor detected since October in the two weeks DJ spent there...and with around N100,000k...
hmmm....Jesus take the wheel biko...

God over to you...

Babymama1:


I spent time reading bits and pieces of that DJ thread and how people came down on you and I
I didn't follow the perx case,I just saw mentions of it
That other hood rat on this recent thread said similar things to me as you were told,even making insinuations that I was using google to write
What an insult
Sad that they talked about doing things differently only to turn around to repeat the same mistake,attacking people who mean well and now they are unable to talk

I saw the unwarranted attacks on your person by that uncouth ingrate yet when they needed you they pretended to be professionals, yet u-turned on you in full glare of the public the moment they saw you come to support just one of my posts. Who does that!!!

And my post only focused solely on the hospital's antics with this high risk patient, yet they kept selfishly turning attention to themselves that it is them I am talking about What's the connection of the hospital to Tehn Afterall Tehn does not own the hospital

Gosh, the mind boggles!!! Anyway God dey...

Babymama1:
Busybody2 nne please go to DJ's thread and see the latest from a nairalander who says she is his neighbor

isalegan2:



Baddest chick! Whazzsharpening? Is Busybody starting trouble in a charitable thread as usual? And BabyOsisi came back for 2nd round, I see.

BTW, can you 'doctors' indicate whether your names end with an M.D.? Much obliged. Can all the specialists and advisers yelling fire do the same. Many thanks!


Ah! Salam, DJDola. Praying (and gisting) as my old frenemy Badosky used to say.

Masha Allah.

Babymama1, I left that DJ thread because of what this odious, vile, thicko, pond scum called Isale$*?@:# said on DJ's thread. What she is referring to happened over 2 years ago on a charity thread, the only ONE post I made to Perx stated she was not a suitable candidate for surgery because she has Fibromyalgia that no reputable hospital would operate on her, etc...people jumped on me telling me to shut up, get out of the thread, etc...never mind the fact that Perx's response to me included "thanks busybody"...PERX DIED...people now later came to post that I should have been allowed to talk...(see below)


Now I try to talk about the hospital in DJ's case but got antagonised and was told to shut up by same oam4j people who said I should have been allowed to talk in Perx' case...I don't understand human beings anymore and would have given up on them if not for God...





March 7th 2012 -

oam4j:
Thank you CC, debrief and others who advocated for peace. And am also happy with all of you that embraced peace.

Moving forward, I think there is one or 2 lessons we all can learn from what happened with the benefit of hindsight.

I know a lot of people see jk and bb as fighters/troublemakers, but underneath those "i will say it as I see it, raw and undiluted without giving a damm how anyone feels" lies some hard truth and realities. Looking back I wish many people saw beyond other things and embrace the intelligent advices bb gave. I remember many times the consultant we got from Lagoon Hospital said she should not rush for surgery until we get to the root cause of her problem. (Which was the same thing bb was saying all along).

To our surprise, a day to the day the consultant was scheduled to meet perx after series of email exchanges through us between perx and the consultant, she admitted herself to UBTH, and the doctor that refused to operate her but recommended her for treatment abroad for more than 2yrs suddenly wanted to operate her in a hurry. She told us the same time she posted it on NL and the surprise was part of the reason we were slow in answering some of the questions on the thread over that decision. In between her exchanges with us I could sense some people were unprofessionally advising her against waiting for the consultant: They thought we were trying to waste money. Then I wish there were many bb to tell her to go back home.

TeHN had no choice than to support her and pray for her, cos if we did otherwise, many of her advisers will see us as playing God with her life even though we were walking on a professional advice and some common senses.

Please don't get me wrong, I am not blaming perx; far from it, anyone in her pain and condition will want to have a solution as quick as possible, including me. But I wish perx had many bb as her advisers, just maybe she might still be alive today.

It is painful for us in TeHN beyond what many of you will understand. Tears rushed out of my eyes, when I read the comment of the consultant we got her, after he was told she passed on, he said "You guys allowed her to walk into her death". To him like bb also said, she shouldn't have been operated, just yet. So as her advisers, I think many of us might have failed her for not telling her enough truth.



Note: jk= jennykadry, bb=busybody and my post is not on behalf of TeHN.

Babymama1:
Busybody2 nne please go to DJ's thread and see the latest from a nairalander who says she is his neighbor

Omg

cococandy:


Did anybody on this thread say the man deserves the wife's behavior?

A handful of women castigated the man and wrote him off as lazy!! Whereas it's his self-esteem that has taken a severe battering from his supposedly bone-of-his-bone

cococandy:
Ok you suggest separation.

Well I don't think their issues have reached that level but then ultimately it is his choice to make.

He needs a break away from her for his sanity sake and for her own safety. This wife forced her husband to move them into one of the family properties they cannot afford to maintain, so the little coins the husband is making is being used to pay the endless bill this property generates and the wife keeps insisting that it is the duty of men to pay 100% bill, hence reason I suggested separation if she refuses to downgrade to a house they can afford...then let's see which man will start bankrolling her lifestyle 100%!

Otherwise hubby would have to sell yet another property to raise capital to start his own business, then wifey will present a bigger bill mandating him to give her a chunk...how long will this vicious cycle continue!!

aisha2:


Sadly we feel he is a man he should snap out of it and start vomiting money as thats all he is good for
He lost his dad, no emotional support, if he clings to his mom or sibblings wahala, he goes to her its wahala, he stays on his own in depression wahala. I doubt most of us read through his post we just saw the part where he hasn't stepped up financially and hung unto that to unleash " you are lazy, get off your bum".
I can't say this enough get out of that toxic relationship before she drowns you, get some help, you can't do that around the noise and abuse
Also you need family at this time, your mom and your sibblings if they are supportive
Don't let that mad woman destroy you

He has been pushed to the wall, so the two likely outcome here is either his mental health deteriorates and he crashes rockbottom and gets stark raving na'ked and wanders into the street OR he looses it and lashes out at her and savagely attacks her and injures her

dinachi:
Busybody2, you won my most profound respect for calling a spade a spade..Honestly I hardly need to add to what you have said..You are a great woman. Your hubby is indeed truly lucky to have you! My grouse with most female posters here is usually the double standards they apply whenever a man is at the receiving end of domestic abuse and violence...

@ Op file for divorce immediately citing emotional abuse of yourself and your son. If she retraces back her step and you see genuine change then maybe you can reconsider.

Your wife is not supportive and with a woman like that you can only go downhill!

What is good for the goose is good for the gander, so if the man was the evil party I would not mince words either.


But in this case, it's the jaded society that is to blame for the biased viewpoint of ladies these days. Women used to suffer more in the hands of men, so men like the OP are seen as unlucky scapegoats who deserve every evil treatment the wifey dishes out to him even though he is innocent.

And I bet this woman solidarity at all cost is not going away anytime soon so y'all men would just have to buckle up for the ride

samuelmag:
i wonder how many Nigerians will die in the U.k before they take serious action against violence to us and blacks.R.I.P fine boy!

You lot complained that Police "stop and search" was racist to blacks and other ethnic minorities, they listened to you and this was stopped...bored black kids aged 8 and above with too much time on their hands used this window of opportunity to start postcode gansterism and started carrying knives to defend themselves as well as rob and kill each other...yet you are complaining again...which is which?!!


Rip Bredrin

MrNiceGuy79:

To be honest, I haven't really been working very hard to chart my own financial path and I don't really know why. I have no motivation to do business, start any business or even work in the family business. I've started to believe it is because the person who is supposed to be supporting me the most, is always putting me down. Any time that I come up with a new business idea she crushes my dreams, telling me how bad that idea is. My father passed away a few years ago and everytime I tell my wife I have gone to do business with my mum, or I want to buy a piece of land with my mother and brother, she gets upset. Now here comes the abuse: .

This Cococandy!!!

He is trying so hard to be a man, but has started seeing himself the way wifey sees him as a useless so and so...And somewhere in there, he is still grieving the loss of his Dad...


So peeps are not just solely attacking wifey, but are giving him a two-pronged solution -

(1) reaffirming his question that yes his wifey is a wicked user

(2) advising him to temporarily get him and his son out of that toxic environment.

cococandy:
Agreed.

So what else can he except defy her, stop waiting for her to decide for him what to do and take his future into his own hands?

Evil wenchy madam is not here to hear all the blame being heaped on her.

He clearly needs professional help from that first paragraph of his OP...

In Africa it might be deemed spiritual/treated spiritually, in the West he will be seeing a Doctor/Therapist for the Clinical Depression he is currently afflicted with which has affected the chemical imbalance in his brain...He needs a nudge away from that depressive stupor state he is wedged in!

A big shame on the so called King/Royal Father who only made sure the baby was deposited at an orphanage, yet still left this little vulnerable girl abandoned and homeless.

chaircover:
What she really is saying is;

I am so jealous that you dont have to work hard to be comfortable
I dont like the fact that I cant boast to my friends that this is what you do for a living
I am scared that becasue you dont leave home to a business or work, you will have time to chase girls around

Wont surpise me if someone asks this woman what exactly she wants her hubby to do, she will say something really silly
These kinds of women are the worst to live with because they dont think logically

@poster my only concern is if you are selling property to feed and pay bills, when you run out of propertys to sell, how will you survive.
Also your late dad left something for you; so think about what you to will leave your kids

I understand that not everyone needs megabucks or want to live the highlife, however pick a business to do and invest your money wisely wherer or not she agrees with you or supports you. .. it will be her loss at the end of the day, if outsiders become closer to you and know whats up more then her your wife. You do what you have to do.

At bolded above, no need to even ask her anything, after rubbishing ALL her husband's suggestion, why didn't she recommend only just one of the 3 businesses she successfully started And why didn't she invite her husband on board at least one business

Kaboninc that said all her "safe-keeping" action looks like that of someone that is planning to dump her husband soon, is not far from the truth!!!

aisha2:


Thanks I thought I was the only one reading this clearly oh. He doesn't even rent, he owns the house they live in yet she will abuse him that its his mothers house.

How does one progress while living with such a witch

This wifey is using jazz or why tell her husband to leave the house when they fight and when he reminds her it's his house, she mocks him that its his Mum's house...

She is on a course to milk this guy dry and render him broke and then call in the divorce lawyers to sue his parents' estate for child support and spousal support...This wifey does not seem like one that can wait for her MIL to die before inheriting everything!!

aisha2:


Sadly the poster seems too soft and the wife knows it oh. See how he easily ran off after the first set of posters attacked him
He is too nice and laid back and people who are mean will take advantage of it.

Not everyone is strong, not every man can scream and shout sadly we only pity women who are abused when men face worse situations we expect them to shake it off and move on.

She is so vile and mean, what has the poor son done?

I saw that too, sometimes being too nice is not a good trait because people would abuse the privilege and call one a mugu on top.

Yeah you are right, men have it worse with domestic violence because they have no obvious place to turn to for help and have to internalise their pain most of the time, so they can keep up the status quo of being "seen" as a man...this is a sad case.

cococandy:

He said it himself. That he has not interest in doing anything.
So he lays on the couch all day?
Where's he providing from?
Family handout from mommy?
Lack of ambitions means what it means. No foresight, no plans, no future put into consideration.

She shoots down and rubbishes ALL his business ideas and talks him out of it and always discourages ALL his suggestions.

cococandy:


If mommy dies tomorrow,that will be the end of it all seeing as he can't even sell okrika to save his life.

He even tried setting up businesses with his Mum, wifey gets upset, he tries to set up business with his siblings, she gets mad, he tries to invest in land and properties with his Mum and Siblings, she goes ballistic, what does she want him to do?!!

cococandy:


He had 20million to start up a business,what did he do? Gave it to his wife most likely because he had no interest in working to make profit from the money. The rest of the 10million he paid debts(why was he in debt since he's from a rich family) probably because he'd rather borrow than make profit from what he has.

He gave her more than half, gave his mum and siblings a pittance, gave wifey's Dad as payment for wifey's debt oh, and used the rest to pay the bills of the mansion in a posh area that wifey insisted they moved to!!! He wanted to move to a reasonable area with modest bills, wifey refused!!! Now she mocks him that they live in a house his mummy built. This woman is pure evil and will soon bleed this man dry and make him penniless.

cococandy:



He could have made it a family business and put down his feet to demand accountability from wife but he just let her get away with doing whatever she wanted with the profits.

I don't want to blame him but it is what it is.
He has opportunity to do anything he wants to do but won't because his wife doesn't approve.

Come on

This doesn't excuse his wife's behavior anyway before someone will get me wrong.

By i'd rather he does something with his life instead of blaming his wife.

He is undergoing emotional domestic violence from this evil wench of a wife, and because its usually the other way round with the woman at the receiving end, it will be hard for him to cry out for help without getting mocked as a wimp, hence reason for his helplessness...

What effrontery!!!


Your wife is a wicked ungrateful user and your son is in danger. She is either a certified witch or has serious mental health problem.

And I totally agree with Aisha2, crackhaus and Dinachi that you are passing through serious domestic abuse in her hands so you need to put your foot down for your health's and your son's welfare.

Give her a month's notice and move out of your current money-guzzling place of residence to where you originally intended, if she refuses to budge, let her know you intend to involve the family about trial separation. That should hopefully jolt her back to her rightful senses!

johnydon22:

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha now this is serious... even the Christians will be laughing at this.. the place weh sweet me pass is that place that u were dragging with jesus who gat more finer looks... chai... their is nothing one will not see in nairaland religion section ooo

Take note, na here you and I go dey when you will start preaching on this section...I understand your worries, you are probably an empath and a laugh-a-minute person like me who just wants world peace and joy all round, but trust God when He says soon we will all be changed in a moment and all the evils of the world would be forgotten and their would be no more pain and suffering...and always remember when you call in Jesus, all things are possible It is well Brethren

johnydon22:

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha chisooooooos This is priceless.... am loving this lady..

You are in the Spirit Bruv

Love indeed is the greatest commandment in the Bible. We are commanded to love God, then love our neighbours as ourselves So don't worry, you would not die as my Christian brother testified in haste, but rather you would live to proclaim the name and marvellous works of our Almighty God

Rilwayne001:


at where? am curious

johnydon22:
where is the lady that said she saw god and jesus in the flesh please am still waiting for u to tell me how and where and how did u know it was them u saw and did u take a selfie with them? they were white dudes huh??

Have posted.

Yes they are whitish in complexion but we have all been adopted as sons of God so skin colour is no longer relevant. In Him their is neither jew nor gentile, male or female, slaves or...

Thsuperiorman:


Next time please don't abbreviate words on me, I find it hard to read all those nonsense you people chat with.

And Emm... Sorry, did I say I believed Galileo or Nastradamus? Did I even say anything about what I believe? I only said I lost my faith and what you highlighted in my post said "...the OP WOULD HAVE TO..." how did you manage to pull out all those conclusions from just that?

I didn't abbreviate your post Sir, I only highlighted a certain part for the likes of the OP and Johnydon22, and as you can see he has responded like the scoffer that he is.

johnydon22:

Because gelileo actually said and wrote and then died and was buried....

Smh