₦airaland Forum

Iyaebe:
Redpillers avoiding singer Osinachi’s husband demonic act of killing his wife.Anyways he’s obviously one of your own

If he has left the blue pill mentality, you will know you are man of options. A man of options won't kill his wife, instead he sees as an opportunity to hunt for fresh leads. He's no redpill.

iamprofessork:
few ladies can keep both at the same time..
while most ladies will go for looks during the day and confidence during the night.. (if you know what I mean)..(◠‿◕)
The major reason why most ladies do this is because they will always like to flaunt there man everywhere they go..
A small percentage of them will go for Confident guy since the majority of the good looking guy are taken already..

Ladies want your dominance in their early teens to the peak of their prime at let say 23yrs. Your looks, Status and Power and don't forget preselection (if other ladies wants him, I want him too) as long as their beauty can afford. But once the flower start declining at early 30s her beauty can't afford those guys again and that's when she remembers her LJBF guy who is priming but who doesn't know he can now afford a younger and tighter lady because of his blue pill mentality. She despises that Beta guy but she still need to check out of the market.

IdanNla:
My girlfriend was raped around March but did not tell me anything about it not until I came back from school and I found out she is acting strange and I got to put up an act so she did tell me what happen after much act she didn’t tell me but lied about the whole thing but I still put more pressure and she later dropped a voice note telling me how it happened.

That a co worker of hers invited her to his home after work and the same guy had asked her for a relationship which she said no and the guy lockup the matter. So this fateful day she requested or invited her to his house getting there the guy's junior brother left for school cause they are daily part-time student, after his junior ones left, he rolled up weed and started smoking, so during the process of smoking or afterward the whole thing started and she claimed to fight him and scream but the guy overpowered him and had his way with her after which the guy pleaded saying he’s sorry and she left for home and called her best friend which she suggest she reported to the police but my babe told her she don’t wish to pursue any case that the deed has been done already and they both lockup the mater.

And she even talked to the guy the next day at work and the guy was like he’s sorry and bought her prevention drug which she collected and used. After that day the guy wanted to start a connection which she refused and the guy was like what else she did want cause he had already beg so what is with her attitude and the guy lockup with her.

Some weeks later she discovered she was pregnant and she told the guy which the guy gave her 4K for abortion and she collected the money and did the abortion.

After saying all this she pleaded I should not breakup with her cause she don’t know how to manage the aftermath of the breakup and what happened was not her intention that she was sorry such thing happened!! After hearing all these I simple asked her some questions about the incident which she don’t have an answer to:

*1= A guy asked you for a relationship and you said NO that is the more reason you should not give him chance of being close or being with him alone in a room!!!*

*2= You went to visit such guy at home and you wore a gown like a guy whom ask you for a relationship would not touch you when he had the chance of being alone with you in a room?*

*3= The said guy roll up weed and light it right in front of you and you sat there comfortably!!*

*4= You claimed you fight him but you got no bruises on you or your undies gettting torn nor your cloth*

*5= You talked to the same guy the next day after the incident*

*6= You concluded to act like nothing happen !!!*

If you are to be me what would you decide after processing all this Asin put your self in my shoe or If your Senior Brother came for advice from you stating all this what would you advice

Right now am devastated not knowing what to do cause this is the same girl am planning on marrying next year or so and I love her more than I can actually comprehend.. Right now she is avoiding me etc But what I wanted to do right now is filling a case at the police station as breaking up has not cross my heart yet but to punish the dude for what he did..

Dump her, the medium is the message, if she respected you she won't go and visit him. Mind you she knew it would happen, does she expect them to be discussing rocket science? If you don't dump her she will still dump you. You should be a man of options and what will a man that has many other ladies lining up will do. Ghost and dump her right and that is exactly what you should do.

You are not responsible for the choice she made. She even make abortion and you didn't know all this was happening. That babe go kill you without you knowing in the future, if he needs to delete you for a purpose

Flahyuq:
Guys,How much do you spend on haircut
Please be sincere!
Highest i have paid so far is 700naira cus of the fuel scarcity and all that
Normally,I spend 500naira

I don't spend a dime. Team Skin Cut, I have my clipper.

Will this affect our parcel on transit?

maasoap:
He shouldn't trust his wife, right? Even if his wife lied, how would he know what his wife hiding if he doesn't take action?

Hmm, e get why

NewDadTroubles:
Good morning Nairaland


I'm going to be as explicit as possible and I need professional legal counsel/inputs to the issue stated below. (Pardon all blunders biko)

My wife recently got fed up with her place of work and decided to tender her resignation letter. She happens to be in the teaching profession and we all know what goes on in the private teaching schools (Most anyways).

On Friday the 4th of March which was supposed to be her final day at the school, the school's HM instructed her phone to put her phone on her desk (HM's) on the pretense that it was an open day and didn't want her distracted. She did exactly that and the day went just fine, after which, she dropped all the school's materials/properties with her and left.
On getting home, she went through her phone and discovered that her WhatsApp messages and conversations had been deleted, text messages deleted, all her contacts deleted, and all chats on her phone read. As if that wasn't enough, a few of her contacts called her to tell her they received messages from the school asking what her relationship was with them? Imagine!!!

Moreover, I think it is also good I state the fact that she and the HM haven't been best of friends due to an event that happened sometimes back between both parties. But for her to pick up her phone and go through it, and not just that, but also deleting her chats and wiping off contacts, deleting photos that has to do with the school, that's to the extreme haba!!!

Is there any legal ground to pursue this case or is it me just being emotional hurt that my wife's privacy has been trampled upon and I need to act. What should be my next point of action?

Thanks
NewDadTroubles

Don't trust everything she told you. E get why.

Couples place a lot of irrelevant demands on each other in a selfish effort to ensure the purity of their relationships. As soon as the demands start ratcheting up and the substance of the demands becomes less comprehensible you can bet that the complaints are coming from a place of insecurity. It is a sign of impending breakup to have to pay tribute to unreasonable requests just to keep the happiness flowing.

The fact that I keep naked pics of my exes on my computer provoked one of these insecure pout-fests from a girl I was seeing. She had “come across” them and wanted me to delete the pics to reassure her that I was not stuck in the past pining for a girl besides her. I rationally (as only a male can do) explained to her that the pics were keepsakes, like any other cherished memory, and deleting them would be like whiting-out passages from my autobiography and turning my back on what made me who I am today. They were no different than stored childhood photos or crayon drawings from 2nd grade art class. The part I left unsaid was that the naked pics would provide excellent masturbation material in my old age.

Just when she was at the frothy height of her indignation she got a call from her ex-boyfriend, with whom she was good friends, and I noticed the ringtone was a chirpy musical number I hadn’t heard on her phone before. I waited for the call to end then pulled out my cell and dialed her number.

*beep* *beep* *beep*

The default ringer!

“So you’re giving me a hard time about ex-gf pics while I don’t even merit a personalized ringer?! I get the default? Not even the halfway decent default either… my important calls get the most basic factory-installed beep. And your ex gets Vivaldi’s Four Seasons?”

“It costs money to get these ringers! Why should I spend money on a special ringer for you when you keep pervert pics of your exes? How do I know we’ll even be together in a month?”

chick logic.

“You didn’t know about my pics until today. But that extra-loving ringtone for your ex has been in your phone since you guys met, eh?”

Back and forth we went, building to a crescendo of angry wild boar sex. Most times the force of a woman’s emotions is enough to win her an argument despite the total lack of justification, but not this time. In reality, the ringer issue didn’t bother me in the least, but I knew that in a girl’s mental landscape an unfavorable ringer discrepancy was a clear act of relationship mutiny, so I played it for all it was worth. Pretending to be shocked and wounded, I filled her with guilt, until she dropped her demand and stalemate was reached. The naked pics stayed safe for my viewing pleasure.

I would’ve won in a court of love, anyhow. Ex-GF nudies are obviously less dubious than being a third-stringer on the ringer team.

Women have a mental laundry list of traits they want in a man. Unlike men, it is not so simple for them to see an attractive guy from across the room for a sum total of 1.5 seconds and immediately want to have sex with him, no questions asked. They throw out hoops to jump through and head games to separate the worthy from the pretenders. As sexual gatekeepers, women rely on this complex social interplay to assess a man’s rank and deny or grant him admission to her body.

A crucial part of seduction is role reversal. You want to turn the tables on women and use their psyops against them. A man can magnify his desirability simply by having standards beyond face, boobs, and bum. It is intoxicating to a woman to be pursued by a man who will judge her for more than her looks. That means sticking to a mental list of qualifications women must meet if they want to enjoy the pleasure of your company. The trick is to pay it more than lip service; having standards means nothing if you don’t actually believe in them.

I know from experience and scientifically-valid astrological textbooks that certain character traits and behaviors are like signal flares of a drama-prone incompatible relationship. If a girl jumps on top of a bar to dance for an appreciative audience on our first dateI know she will be a poor choice for a girlfriend but a great ride for a torrid fling.

To any girl I meet: when I strike up a conversation with you this is what is going through the back of my head:

Don’t be that girl…

… who thinks diamonds are a better best friend than a dog

… who lost touch with her femininity

… who has given up on love

… who pretends she can play like a boy

… who flakes

… who knows what she wants a little too surely

… who is an attention LovePeddler

… who is practiced in the art of aloofness and indifference (that’s my job)

… who cannot handle teasing

… who has sexual hangups

… who cannot take a sincere compliment

… who has lost her joie de vivre

… who doesn’t understand that men and women complement, not compete with, each other

… who re-applies her make-up every 10 minutes

… with daddy issues

… who doesn’t at least reach for the check

… who likes being a trophy a little too much

… who reads between every line

… who curses and flips the bird a lot

… who uses too much trendy slang

… who will accept flirting from other men while we are out on a date

… who mugs for invisible cameras

… who is externally validated

This may seem like an exhaustive, impossibly unrealistic list, and for most girls maybe it is, but compared to the list of demands I occasionally read on craigslist from the sorts of women who’d be happier in love if they paid for it, I don’t think I’m asking for much.

In the event I ever feel compelled to ask a girl I am dating for her opinion on aspects of me that relate to my attractiveness to women in general, I always take into account the balance of power in our relationship. If she perceives her value to be lower than mine, true or not, then I know not to expect an objective, unbiased opinion from her when discussing those things that might enhance my sexual marketability.

One such subject matter is fashion. In an age when women are abandoning their natural calling to nurturing, monogamous relationships with reliable providers for the player lifestyle of serial flings practiced by men, the modern man has learned to accept that an eye-catching sense of style is an increasingly important tool in his efforts to sell himself to women. But straight men are so far behind the fashion curveball that they have had to turn to the women in their lives for advice on how to dress seductively. They usually turn to girlfriends. This is a mistake.

No girlfriend has ever given me a straight answer on anything that wasn’t distorted in some way by her fear of losing me to another woman. If I’m shopping for new clothes with a girl who is really into me, she’ll do her best to frump me out in baggy button down shirts a size too large and in formless Hanes Beefy T’s.


sexxxy
From her perspective, this makes perfect sense. She is emotionally invested in me so the last thing she wants is for me to look good enough to other women to be a flight risk. It will only make her more insecure having to deal with the flirtations of boyfriend-stealers. If you have one of these girls in your life, don’t expect her to ever approve of that tight designer shirt tailored to accentuate your masculine ‘V’. Your best bet is to go shopping with girl buddies who secretly harbor an infatuation with you. They will act out their fantasies through the clothes they make you try on.

Your other option is to date girls who think they are higher value than you. This type of girl will actually work to make you look better because so much of her validation is wrapped up in how others judge her choice in boyfriend. The trade-off is that you’ll be dating a self-absorbed but at least you will look good.

Ahmed0336:
Can't do this, except there's something I'm targeting and will need to pass through her.
Ex my foot

Read to the end. I said it never works. Nothing beats aloofness after a break up

BeanmanX:
Why should I win back my ex? my past is my past,,,,

I'm not responsible for your impatient. Shows you didn't read to the end chump

Every text or email or recordable instance of conversation you have with a girl must follow this simple rule:

If it were given a public airing, let’s say on a blog or a sports stadium jumbotron, you should feel comfortable with what you have written for the world to see. You should not feel an urge to wince, because it will be clear to everyone reading it how alpha you are. If the thought of someone other than you and your girl reading your permanently archived romantic exchanges makes you cringe with embarrassment, then you are doing something wrong that will eventually lead to your girl dumping you.

An example of texting* from a place of beta-tude:

YOU: Good morning, lovechop! � I had a gr8 time w u last nite!
HER: Me too. Can’t wait to see you again.
YOU: U free this thurs? Miss u. Muaah muuah!
HER: Aw. Thanks sweetie. Call me later.
YOU: � Will do! �

People reading this will puke a little and say “What a lameass. Like that’s gonna last.”

An example of texting from a place of alphaness:

YOU: {nothing}
HER: U there? Haven’t heard from u in a while.
YOU: Hey, babe. What’s up?
HER: The love last night was incredible! Have u been thinking of me?
YOU: Just a little.
HER: � Miss u already, baby. Muuah!
YOU: {nothing}

The difference is clear. This man has kept his responses shorter than his girl’s and intriguingly aloof. He has refrained from emoting effusively. An objective third party would say “He’s cool. Bet he gets laid a lot.” You want to be a man people think gets laid a lot, even if you don’t.

*Avoid texting on a regular basis. It is borderline beta. A man should not have the empty time to punch in a frivolous conversation with a girl using only his thumb.

If you are the sort of vengeful prick who’d put real effort into bedding an ex just to turn the tables on her with a grandiose post-coitus exit, then you’ll need a proven method for achieving your goal. One of the hardest feats to accomplish is re-igniting an ex-girlfriend’s attraction for you, especially if she initiated the breakup. Unlike guys, who are perfectly OK with return trips to the well no matter how dry, women have a no-looking-back switch that, when flipped, desexualizes the man she had spent months or years enslaving with her body. In her eyes, he is reduced to possessing the animal magnetism of a toll booth operator or a paperboy. Once she has crossed this rubicon of fatal unattraction, his chances of re-bedding her dwindle to zilch. You may think that the wild uninhibited sex bonded you two securely for the ages, but you can forget it – girls are creatures of the moment and if she dumped you you can bet she dumped all those memorable sex scenes, too. She’s saving her inner dirty LovePeddler for a new man now.

Given this reality, your best bet for turning her around is to put your plan into action *before* she formally becomes your ex. You have a short window of opportunity to do this. The longer you have been with her the more warning she will give you with her change in behavior. She won’t end a 2 year relationship overnight; you’ll have at least a month to clue in to the red flags. Your number one priority, then, is recognizing the danger signals. Infrequent or bland sex is of course an obvious indicator. Look for delays in returning your calls and texts. See if her eyes follow suit when she smiles (dead eyes are a dead giveaway). Tone of voice will always betray a woman — musical when she’s happy, girlish when she’s affectionate, breathy when she’s Hot, monotone when she’s lost respect for you. Watch for contemptuous mannerisms like eye-rolling or tch-ing. If she starts asking you strange questions or leading conversations down bizarre paths, that is her way of smoking you out. She no longer trusts you to engage in normal playful conversation with you. Go with your gut. 90% of the time it will be right.

Awareness of changes in her demeanor wins you half the battle. You must also maintain complete state control. If you give in to the rush of emotions that your traitorous brain floods you with when faced with an impending loss you will fail. What is required of you is to CUT AND RUN before her doubts about you cement. You must be the one to leave first. Minimize face time. Don’t call her. Be friendly but ambiguous. Don’t inquire into her life. Laugh off her crappy attitude. Most importantly, act as if nothing is wrong. If she senses you are acting aloof out of spite the spell will be broken. Eventually, she will wander back to you, bewildered and intrigued, filled with doubt about her hasty judgment. You will resume a pattern of dating and sex that eerily resembles the first few weeks together. NEVER give the game away that you knew she was losing attraction if you want to avoid rekindling her impression of you as a weak beta.

What I have described above is the ideal ex-GF strategy. Like most ideals, hardly anyone lives up to them. And with good reason – maintaining composure in the midst of a dying relationship you don’t want to end demands superhuman grace under pressure. Only the strongest alphas with a solid stable of regulars can cavalierly brush off the prospect of one of his girls attempting to dump him. He knows she won’t muster the willpower to leave, but if she does it won’t matter anyway.

The less experienced man caught offguard will need to learn the art of turning it around after her decision to leave is made but before she has reached the no-looking-back stage. Chances of re-notch success are much lower once she has verbalized her need for space, but with proper post-relationship game you can improve your odds dramatically. The key is in the timing. A mathematician has shown that the dumper’s loneliness and nostalgia for the broken relationship peak at about 3 weeks after the breakup, unless she has found another man in the interim. Therefore, your job is to let her go and not speak to her for 3 weeks. This will amplify her feelings of loss. Then, at her most vulnerable 3 weeks later, call to say hi. Keep the convo short and friendly. Chances are best right at this moment that she will offer to meet you for drinks.

You’ll notice the common denominator with these strategies. They only work if you do the OPPOSITE of what the typical guy would do. Very few men getting dumped would have the presence of mind to lay low and refrain from trying to talk her out of her decision. But that is exactly the winning formula. Your breezy indifference will win back more exes than all the post-breakup talks in the world. Lean back, reap your bounty, and if you’ve got the balls calmly tell her after the post-breakup violation of all her holes “Eh, you know, I shouldn’t have taken you back. This isn’t going to work.”

How long is too long to stay in the dating game? The primary reason for the psychological unease and emotional instability of so many modern women and to a different extent modern men resides in the irresolvable tension between our ancient biological inheritance and the relatively recent emergence of the high-tech rootless world of unparalleled mate choice we now inhabit.

It would shock most people if they were to be transported back in time to when humans lived in small tribes to see young girls having babies at 14 and again at 14 years and 9.5 months. There are subsistence cultures that behave this way today. The bulk of our pre-history was spent in conditions like this so it is no wonder that our brains are having trouble coping with a radically different environment where childbirth is routinely put off until the mid-30s, if at all, and rejection by a woman no longer means banishment to the icy wastelands of celibate metadeath when a man need merely walk to the other side of a bar to try again.

One consequence of this new paradigm is the absurd number of years spent in the dating circuit.

Women are designed by nature to begin the next generation not much older than age 25. Her risk of miscarriage or fetal abnormalities increases each year after that and exponentially so after 35. Her body begins to wear down which affects how much energy she can devote to raising small children. If she has not found a suitable mate by her late 20s she will begin to notice that those powerful feelings of infatuation she felt for crushes when she was younger, perfectly created by evolution to bring a man and woman together to make babies, now seem muted and foggy. This in turn will sap the dating experience of the best things it has going for it – namely, the spontaneity, the euphoria, the intense drive to connect – and leave behind a desiccated simulacra of dating that more closely resembles haggling over a business deal or suffering through a job interview. Overthinking replaces lust.

It is an embittering realization.

Men, too, have had to adjust under the new system. Anthropologically-speaking, it wasn’t so long ago that a man (or his immediate kin) blew his entire wad of hard-earned social and material capital wooing one or two women over the course of his natural lifespan. In a pre-birth control age when the first deflowering blast inside a woman often meant conception followed by years of fatherhood there were limits on just how many female sex partners the average man could accumulate in a lifetime. The rigorous experience of winning over and keeping the best quality woman he could afford and then providing for their kids soon thereafter meant that serial dating was not a typical feature of life. Dating 40 or 50 different women in a year and jumping haphazardly in and out of 3-month mini-relationships is a peculiarity of modern life for which men are not optimized. The energy requirement is enormous. Men have adapted to this stressful cycle of meet-attract-close-keep by either settling and marrying the first girl that would have them (usually high school sweethearts who have not lived enough to acquire unrealistically picky standards) or by hardening themselves against the judgment of women and learning to play the numbers game.

The game begat the player.

In the gigantic atomized urban tribe of any big city playing the numbers is not the high risk strategy it once was for our distant male ancestors who were often locked out of any future matings when a pickup attempt went awry and the target or cockblock would run and tell the whole tribe what a loser he is. Today, the proximity of exes has very little impact on potential future conquests. For men, this has bought them virtually unlimited opportunity to get laid. For women, this has robbed them of one of their most potent weapons in ensuring that only the fittest males get access to their vaginas — the withering ostracization of their sexual rejection.

On the flipside, men have lost confidence in the fidelity of their chosen partners while women have gained unstigmatized sexual freedom allowing them to play the field until the perfect man finally arrives to sweep them off their feet.

I do not think the current reality of endless dating can last. Something must give. Either humans will evolve into different social animals capable of withstanding decades of hookups and fragmentary relationships without turning to the comforts of cats and internet porn, or those people who serially date and delay childbirth will not have enough kids and natural selection will remove them from the gene pool as a failed experiment. Either way, change is in the air.