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Omar09: Love isn't beautiful as you think. Love is a scorpion that stings to death but only this time its stings comes with an antidote n you don't get to die. But it keeps repeating itself in a sequence not patterned. Like Deja Vu
apokan200: Your lecturer said that and you believe in his ideology lol,don’t be deceived bro most men says what they can’t do or what isn’t happening in their life,lecturers are like pastors they lie too much and tryna put non existing things in their life into your own mind.no African man can take it not even your lecturer,so he’s fucking lying by saying he’s wife does that with another man
Let's not forget that it worked for him. And it's working for me.
MrBrownJay1: African men should only take 33% of the blame on this issue....the other 33% blame should go to women who indeed make men jump through hoops before they can see the color of their panties, let alone get hitched (in the name of courtship)...and the last 33% should go to Nigerian society who is hell bent on this brideprice thingy, that make men truly believe they OWN their wives outright.
Having this woman (you' ve paid for) go and have sex with strangers, is like buying a cow/car and having total strangers enjoying the milk/drive.... over my dead body.
This is the main root of the problem. No man will forgive you for taking what he got with sweat and blood.
MrBrownJay1: The reality is that most men (unless physically impaired or with immense age difference) wouldn't accept that their wives got their groove on outside....unless they were swingers.
Africans only believe in open marriage when it goes ONE WAY (aka only man is allowed to fool around)
Brownjay, your point is valid. No one frowns at the man in Africa when it comes to such things.
missjo: You're welcome and yes its a thing,although i fear you are advocating it among the wrong crowd. Naijans are super extra sensitive about things like this so expect some knocks on your digital head
Lol. You're right. This is Nigeria. Let me go and get a helmet.
missjo: I believe what you're arguing for is an open marriage and if that is the case, lotta people already practice it. It's a choice thing and is so not for everyone.
Wow. Thank you. I didn't know that there is a name for it.
Sex has destroyed more marriages than any other thing. This is because we are sexual animals who like to satisfy our urges with someone who we find desirable.
But as God made it, we will continue to find a lot of desirable men and women who are better than the desirable one we married.
This becomes WORSE if our crush is available and agrees to play the game.
What happens next will be that your wife/husband will stop being at the top of your priorities because of that shiny new person you met.
A series of shitty problems will start arising...
And then DIVORCE. Everything including the children gets messed up.
OK.
The scenario of family damage could have been entirely avoided if you knew the two most important aims of marriage.
What are they?
PROCREATION and COMPANIONSHIP.
That's All!
Just give birth to children and enjoy a lifetime of friendship with your wife.
And to stay friends with your partner, you need to give her freedom to do whatever including sleeping with whoever she finds alluring.
Most times, telling her that will make her to WILLFULLY decide not to. That's called reverse psychology.
Other times, they will take the bait and start living fully. But the good thing about it is that everything will still be normal because it's a game that both of you are playing.
And the hook up stories you tell each other will strengthen your bond.
Bad things happen when you decide to control people. People hate those who CONTROL them.
And it doesn't help that we're talking about KONJI here.
Allow people to do whatever they want to do so that you know what they will rather do. And that will solve a lot of problems and answer all your questions before you ask them.
P.S: I LEARNT this from my Biochemistry lecturer. If you see where him and his wife dey like this, you will be envious of how close and happy they are with themselves. And in one of his lectures, he said that his secret to a happy marriage was marrying his best friend and allowing her and she allowing him to enjoy themselves SEXUALLY with others in a coded way. It's been 14 years, and they are still together.
Lol. I copied his method to deal with my girlfriend. Let's just say that I consider myself the happiest man alive.
BuikemWillz: Write-ups and thought patterns like these are sickening to me. The fact you've been unfortunate and have been meeting people that think like you, or know people who have been, doesn't give you the effrontery to posit that there's no such thing as unconditional love. Unconditional love does exist...
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