₦airaland Forum

Kyllahmc:
I never regret anything i did out of love... Or when the going was good between me and someone.. Wether they deserve it or not, As long as i felt good doing it then it doesnt matter anymore.
What matters is your current location and destination.

queenbetsy:
oh dear... she must have left so many scars then. Different strokes for different folks. Only you can help yourself out, it's very easy.

queenbetsy:
what did u regret doing for your ex?

samuel051:
you are not far from the truth bro,but one thing I also realized is that,since they didn't suffer d way d guy did in order to assist them in times of distress,it makes it so easy for them to just over look things and say what pleases them not minding d stress d guy went through.

queenbetsy:
though we talked about it several times bt it seemed as if i was the one in need of the relationship and he's not concerned, I played along and eventually freed him which he least expected

samuel051:
trained her from HND 2 till nysc, though she used to assist me in my ond days wen things were tough for me, because of a little argument,she asked me wat have i ever done for her,this was sum1 her mom said she wont go to HND,told her to go get married,she cried and cried no be small,na so we stay together,buy text books and everything,even bought clothes for her,feeding and everything was on me for more than 4 years because after service we were still together, d day she made that statement, my head spin,she apologised sha,but i lost interest in her till i had to call everything off,we still talk till date but,it has made me to mind the way i help people.

queenbetsy:
exactly... but fortunately, i got happiness elsewhere

queenbetsy:
I regret falling in love with him...

banio:
I guess I know the girl. Her name starts with ""

LordAdam16:
I think I have a valid point to make on this topic because I'm a moderate alexes. I'm not a complete alexes like this guy, but I'm a guy who reads and watch movies about love, but never gets it. Marriage sounds like a sh*tty arrangement (no offense to married folks), and I scoff when I see pre-wedding photos. I'm like this man laughing with glee with his wife-to-be could be her killer tomorrow. The majority of females in the US who die are killed by guys they're in a relationship with (as a gf or as a wife).

Alexithymia does have it's good sides, I'm a pragmatic humanist and a brutal realist. But it can be an awful curse in a sea of emotional no-holds-barred homo sapiens.

And that brings me to my main point. No matter how many times you tell a lady you don't want to marry her, it wouldn't stop her from falling in love and getting hostile when you remind her of your existing agreement. It doesn't matter if she's intelligent or dumb, a NASA scientist or a marketwoman, a 70 yr old or a 15 yr old, an introvert or an extrovert, a mel or a san.

Your ex was an exception not the rule.

And I'll know because I've NEVER being in a romantic relationship with anyone. I haven't dated anyone, and right now, wouldn't even if I had a gun to my head. Ladies, regardless of age, intelligence, or personality, are as fickle as the wind. They are only as reliable as a speck of dust in a hurricane. Which is evident by the fact that more than 80% of the ladies who read your account (most of them def educated), didn't even care to understand your position.

F*ck a lady more than once, and if you are cool, with good looks, and a bit of cash, she'll already be imagining her wedding night with you. You don't even have to date her. I know because it has happened to me severally. Before I said, you know what, f*ck this, I don't have the time, energy or will to pander to people whose self-confidence and decision-making ability are about the size of a pea.

Maybe it's the Nigerian factor, maybe it is a female thing. But I don't have reason to believe that it's either of those things. Marriage doesn't need to be a ceremony for the whites, so yeah the girl could ask you to just wife her on the road with an eligible clergyman, court person or JP on a lunch break. And clearly, the majority of males on this thread too have shown to not have simple comprehension abilities too.

Being honest and straightforward in all ramifications is worthless. That's why the Yoruba demons don't care. Convince her she's the only one and break her heart when you're done with her. Because whether you are honest with her from the start, she'll still see an expected end as a messy breakup. So, why bother yourself?

For me tho', I can't go through that hoop. Sounds like taking a flight from Lagos to London, then from London to Abuja, when I could just take a direct ticket from Lagos to Abuja. And I like to respect ladies even tho' they evidently don't respect themselves enough.

So, I'm not going to tell you what to do. You're an adult. But I'm going to tell you this for a fact.

Even if you gist a girl. Tell her there's no chance in hell that the relationship will end in marriage. And she agrees. Weeks or months down the line, she'll still fall in love (I don't know how to explain this, the closest I can get is that humans like to have what they can't get) and hope she can change your mind to marry her. And every time you tell her no (basically reiterating what you've told her since day 1), you'll just make her more desperate and hostile. And God help you the day she snaps. She could destroy your house or worse maim/kill you (whether it's an acid or a knife to the chest).

I'm incapable of loving a lady, so I don't NEED to maintain relationships whether platonic or romantic. It's physiologic, so I have it easy. For you and several other guys, all I can say is, be careful.

This is one instance where HONESTY IS A BAD POLICY THAT CAN POTENTIALLY RUIN YOUR LIFE. Unless you find an exceptionally lady, which as you've probably figured out is rare and there's no way of knowing if she'll be an exception before you go all in.



There is a huge difference between what people read and what they understand. It is actually a phenomenon. Read this BBC future article on the spread of ignorance. That article is just a foundation.

The majority of humans are zombies. I don't mean post-apocalyptic zombies in the movies. I mean healthy, educated zombies with jobs and families. And politicians, social engineers, advertisers, and marketers know this is the world's best kept secret.

The person you quoted def read the OP, but s/he comprehended something different. What s/he read was interpreted differently in her brain.

And even if it was interpreted correctly, it doesn't stop s/he from still having a distorted view point. It could very well be that s/he doesn't care if the OP said it pointedly clear that he wasn't interested in marriage from the get-go. S/he is probably disillusioned that it is not possible for anyone to say that or for anyone to really mean that, and that maybe it was a ploy by the OP to eat his cake and have it. And that the lady in the OP was manipulated, basically a victim of circumstance (despite her being a full healthy and educated adult capable of even co-managing a business with the OP).

The human brain is a marvel really, a bloody sick twisted marvel.

To your other post about ladies virtually painting something bad despite several good references simply because they did not have her way, that is another FACT. Have you looked at the divorce stats in the Western world? Or the near divorces that people call "happy marriages" in Nigeria with regular third-party mediation.

Most ladies want to have their way or raise hell. They'd change the narrative, do anything humanly possible to make sure they f*ck you over if you don't let them have their way. And if that includes tagging a beautiful relationship with terrific history as a mistake on a whim, then so be it.

There are exceptions, but everyone has a limit. A girl who you think is understanding you may just be piling it all up, waiting for that perfect moment to pounce on you with the favorite--I've been managing... (don't need to finish it, you get the point).

Seriously, you look at the female gender and if you're a creationist, you ask the question, why did God even bother? Like did Adam complain that he was lonely? There are animals that can reproduce without mating. So the reproduction reason does not fly. God created women to f*ck men up, and they've done a pretty good job, starting from the Apple.

-Lord

moralistic:
like accepting her proposal ?

moralistic:
childish

Actually, no, we both knw it isn't it was Explanatory and enlightening for u. And the only reason why u replied with "childish" is because u feel it's COOL to say a snotty one-word after someone exposes ur ignorance. Next time just take the correction with a smile, and move on. The world wud respect u for it


Now, before u conceive another one of ur snotty responses, I've some lucrative things to attend to. Later!

prittygift114:
women do not date on e men because people like him love to hit and run....
And if u see nothing wrong in toiling with someone's emotions then let your emotion never meet anyone who cares about it.... That guy z used to such rubish don't u here him said he did it to someone before this recent one? Why spoiling other men's future wife....WTF!!!

hello ANGEL SAINT, let's make a bet. I'll transfer u N30,000 right away if u can prove that ure NOT thinking with ur HEART ryt now. cos I say u are

ojlifa:
I wish i could help you but till date to man can claim to have perfect understanding of those creatures

moralistic:
..so you finally returned the ATM card...good one

Err... don't confuse me with one of ur clique mates bro. Ive got my own card. Shes got hers. Business brought us together. And the "unfinished business" in the post means we both invested in something that's almost matured. So, scurry on with ur uniformed opinion!

vicardino:
Guy, if I were u, I would take her "HOSTILITY" as a sign for u to go spiritual o. U may not understand but don't ever think she won't treat ur f up if she belongs. Didn't know I had been hit cos she was never hostile, took it in good faith I thought until few years later, then I realized she's still dealing with me. Some of them can be very merciless ehnnnn. I pray u take this advice.

Emzyme:
Lol that is how one started acting all jealous whenever a gal calls me or am talking with one
Bros u shld nt have told her ur plans plainly ,
Give her hope , then crush that hope
Then disappear from her life

Obiwannn:
Well, I'm just reiterating the part where you said you'd just bid your time with a view to move on in future, and I am seriously considering that route. I mean you even said it yourself that girls would come and say bla bla bla he dumped me... when in actual fact they were dumped because of their perceived actions or in actions.

And again I used to think she behaves the way she behaves because she's not Nigerian and probably due to the way their society see women, I haven't really dated a Nigerian for that long to know for certainty how women behave, in fact the whole dating thing is quite new to me. But having considered what you have posted here I can draw up some similarities and conclude that women are women no matter the part of the world they are from and more often than not, they do deserve what they get.

Sincere4u:
Mtcheeew!
Yeye post!.
what were you dating them for?... just sex?.
mtcheeeeeew
Better you date when you are ready for marriage.

NotComplaining:
Then be the bigger man and stfu.

NotComplaining:
So now u sabi talk rights? The girl that doesnt have a dic*k is right-less abi?

Naija will continue carrying last in everything as long as ppl like you are allowed to breathe.

Obiwannn:
This" Shes the type that, if something isn't going her way then it is BAD no matter how great it has been."

OP this got to me. I have same issue also with my gf. Are all women truly like this? I mean everything is great then at the slightest provocation she flares up and it is BAD, no matter how great it has been. Is that the way women behave? Because like you now, I'm also considering bending to her rules just because I want to break her heart in future. I mean it seems it does not pay to be a good guy again o

NotComplaining:
what would you think if you were the brother of the girl? Women aren't toys man! If i were the girls bro i'd beat the shi*t out of you for the disrespect.The sister aint your prostitute nigguh.

You took advantage of a clearly vulnerable girl to satisfy ur glut gtfo. Ask the girls dad for advice.

Thank God Muslim countries worth their name do not tolerate such impunity.

alexialin:
We are not wicked or selfish. If u know u can't marry a babe u are wooing? Then hands off! Women are like flowers. You don't keep fucvking and dumping when u are tired. That's pure wickedness on your part. Pray your babe does not go extreme and deal with u diabolically.. Na then!, when u come. Life next time.. You will run away from pussssies.

Evil guy.

alexialin:
No mind such guys. I wonder why the babe could not decipher that he's not the serious type. Such guys I smell them from afar and avoid them like plagues.
You can't come and waste my time. Smhhh.
He should pray she's not diabolic, if not his future don set be that.

Damfostopper:
op you don't have a problem... d only problem Yu have is that your stewpidity has no bounds.... did is wat gals Gat wen d date under-25 Niqqaz

Funkybabee:
Op karmaly is coming for you just be alert, whether daughter or sisters!!!

AngelsAndStars:
So before the relationship you told her the status quo and she still agreed. I think the girl is the witch here. if she were not deceptive hoping she'd change your mind she wouldn't have agreed.

see hypocrites criticizing the OP, same idiots who watch BBNigeria where immorality is being promoted.

for those of you blasting the OP. to hell.

Kennyodinye:
drop her picture.....and better beg that igbo girl before dey use juju for you head...oponu

yedidiah:
Don't go into a close relationship with a lady you are not sure you will go the distance with. Also, when you are friends with a lady, emphasise and keep reiterating it to her that you don't have plans for marriage cause ladies get so comfortable easily and begin to think ahead.

As for you bro, you can't keep postponing the evil day.

Elesta:
Nawa oh in my entire life i havent come across this kind of self centered person n i dont pray to see.Na real wa.Hisses