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ClassCaptain's Posts

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PoliticsRe: Nnamdi Kanu Drives A Combatant Car Manufactured By An Igbo Guy(pics) by ClassCaptain(m): 2:51am On Aug 24, 2017
omolola15:
Ok
baba. nla
CelebritiesRe: OAP, Freeze Rocks Fur In New Photo by ClassCaptain(m): 6:35pm On Aug 22, 2017
Bobrisky loading
RomanceRe: How Instagram Slay Mama Scammed Me by ClassCaptain(op): 2:46pm On Aug 21, 2017
dollytino4real:
go to t.b. joshua to deliver u from that spirit of knackology that possess u becos of that girl
knackology ooh grin
RomanceRe: How Instagram Slay Mama Scammed Me by ClassCaptain(op): 2:45pm On Aug 21, 2017
thepussyhunter:
Oga classcaptain i want the part two
how you take revenge grin
watch out for part 2
RomanceRe: Men Only Enjoy The Last Minute During Sex by ClassCaptain(m): 12:41pm On Aug 21, 2017
Rorachy:
Why does sex end when a man cum?
Like seriously that's fuckng selfish.
Especially when the lady is about to have an orgasm huh.
I see innocence in your face, but you idi wants to bia ...

haha
CelebritiesRe: Kunle Afolayan's Cute Family Photo With His Children by ClassCaptain(m): 11:40am On Aug 21, 2017
This is Kunle and not aremu.

lalasticlala
BusinessRe: See What A Lautech Final Year Student Ventured Into After 2years Of Strike by ClassCaptain(m): 9:17am On Aug 21, 2017
TieTiwanTiwa:
More. ..
.

nice
RomanceRe: How Instagram Slay Mama Scammed Me by ClassCaptain(op): 8:05am On Aug 21, 2017
MyNewJackeT:
ClassCaptain so this your story is a lie, you don't even know Spanish fly, and I'm sure you haven't used it before.
Say God huh?
RomanceRe: How Instagram Slay Mama Scammed Me by ClassCaptain(op): 7:31am On Aug 21, 2017
crazygod:
I just have two questions.
1. What is Spanish fly
2. How did u revenge.
At least answer no 1 biko
Spanish fly is a cream that turns on a woman when it is rubbed on her body ...The cream puts a woman in the mood ..
RomanceRe: How Instagram Slay Mama Scammed Me by ClassCaptain(op): 7:27am On Aug 21, 2017
Donfamous:
bros go finish your story of how you lost a 150k job. guess have waited tirelessly on that one
tomorrow bro ...by God's grace
RomanceRe: How Instagram Slay Mama Scammed Me by ClassCaptain(op): 10:28pm On Aug 20, 2017
skillz121:
All theeesssseeeee!! just to have sex?Were u a V then?
A , Wetin go B go B , so baba C , as long as I get D wey make people dey refer to me as E , I GATS to F even tho I broke small cos am not into G and na every time I dey H for P..

So no ask Me If I be V or not, Maka Y na ?? grin
RomanceRe: How Instagram Slay Mama Scammed Me by ClassCaptain(op): 10:21pm On Aug 20, 2017
skarlett:
I know you lying buh continue cheesy
i DON'T lie to fine girls




I lie with them grin
RomanceRe: How Instagram Slay Mama Scammed Me by ClassCaptain(op): 10:19pm On Aug 20, 2017
cc lalasticlala, Dominique
RomanceRe: How Instagram Slay Mama Scammed Me by ClassCaptain(op): 10:10pm On Aug 20, 2017
Criis:
gringrin

This another one of your stories?
Stories that touch from a real life angle
RomanceHow Instagram Slay Mama Scammed Me by ClassCaptain(op): 8:43pm On Aug 20, 2017
There was this girl on IG that was always
commenting and liking every pic i post ...,
whether the pic was fine or not , if i post pic
withnin fifteen minutes she don like am...

"Cute, nice picture., lovely. Am tripping o,fine boy,
my dream guy ...". This were her comments on
most of my pictures.

So without much ado, i concluded her favourite
alphabet is D ... Got her number via Dm which
she sharparly sent , We got talking and close.... I
would sometimes send her card, money , the rest
.,.. All in a bid to knack am, knack am ,her treasure
island
.
I met her 2 months to my birthday and i had
already scheduled how i will deliver her seriously
with my koboko on my birthday ... Infact that
was why i celebrated it that year.

I informed her of the birthday and paid her transport
fare from lag of almost 16k to where i was based
via air...,
i had already made plans for drinks with alcohol
and Also purchased original spanish fly....
Birthday set, drinks, chicks , guys ,all costing me
huge sums..
.
i was already watching power, spartacus, tudors
and kamasutra, got a playlist of tesojue laleyi, aleyi
a bad,akon i just had sex and many other bad
songs to elevate my spirit as i hit the gym to keep
in shape and drank two cups of dorowebo,
sobotone and ponkriyon daily...

On D D day, Only for this girl to show up with two
friends,,, two fuvking male friends....
I questioned what she was doing with them and she
said they were her cousins and that they really
admired me and wanted to see me and celebrate
with me...

Asked how they got money,she stated they came by
car...

I was furious like Vin diesel in ff8 but i kept calm ... If u like bring arnold or van damne with you , i am strong withsobotone and ponkriyon. I will chop you die..

All my attempts to lay with this girl or get her alone
failed as she was always with this guys..

Finally when i had a chance with her. I was still
kissing and smooching for just 3 mins when she
said she cant do it.. All my pleas with tears in
my eyes didnt move her. .. It got to a point she
said she was on her period which i knew she was
lying...

She didnt allow me to touch her despite me being
on cloud 9. . I thought of the money spent,
the drinks, dj etc but i resisted the evil spirit telling
me To Molest her...

I still had to pay her and her brothers or cousins
fees back home., this time via bus as i was already
broke and furious....
I messaged her and angrily voiced out my
displeasure and she apologized for bringing her
cousins that she didnt know it was wrong... She
also begged me to forgive her for not dropping her
p as she does want me to see her as cheap that
was why..

She made a promise that i will come around on her
birthday and she will Bleep me over till i ask for
fuvk no more and she sent me some bikini pics to
compensate me...

Ordinary bikini pics, i forgot about all that happened
and forgave her despite the 15k debt i incured fot
the party and the rest..
.
Since that time, her birthday had been on my mind.
... I even sent her money towards the venue
of the party and all.. Tho it was 6 months
away, i dreamt of it day and night..

As soon as it was a month to the birthday, i started
messaging her, she started replying late, ignoring
most of it ....if i call she will say she is busy and
most time it is always switched off
.
Her voice changed most times on phone and she
maintained this sober outlook... But wetin concern
me...

Me i must fuvk u

so imagine my surprise 2 weeks before her
supposed birthday when i saw her birthday pics on
IG.....sad
am i dreaming.... I quickly messaged her and
asked for explanation... She told me june 21 was
her day...

Haa , sorry i thought i said june 12 naw.. I was
even expecting u i didn't see you and i couldn't call
cos my phone was switched off.... Don't worry,. I
will hold one next year again "

this was the text message she sent me after two
day of texting, calling , messaging and emailing
her..

. She blocked me and changed her ig account to
private afterwards...

POINT

Why are ladies like this ? Someone cannot even
trust ladies on social media again ? I wonder how
social media gotten marriages worked ? Guys pls
learn.. We should also learn how to control ourselves and know that all that glitters is not gold. God go protect us all.

I paid her back in her own coin tho and later revenged but why are girls like this.
CrimeRe: Ass.comm Of Police, Yomi Shogunle Slams DG. Joe Abah For Reporting Him To Buhari by ClassCaptain(m): 7:07pm On Aug 20, 2017
He who has ate, has the strength to bother himself with all these ..

Garri and 50 kulikuli that I bought yesterday since morning
Lord take control of this country
Yomi Shogunle Kor, Jumi Badagry ni
RomanceRe: Twitter User Narrates How To Get Nigerian Ladies Off Balance by ClassCaptain(m): 7:02pm On Aug 20, 2017
Cc lalasticlala, dominique, flirtykaren
RomanceRe: Hilarious Chat Between Man Who Wanted Nudes And A Facebook Lady by ClassCaptain(m): 7:01pm On Aug 20, 2017
Kasa
RomanceRe: How Lapping A Girl Destroyed A 3 Years Relationship - Twitter User !!! by ClassCaptain(m): 6:46pm On Aug 20, 2017
grin
Music/RadioRe: Olamide’ S New Song “wo ” To Be Banned As Ministry Of Health by ClassCaptain(m): 7:53am On Aug 20, 2017
non senss
CelebritiesRe: Saint Obi Looking Good In New Photos by ClassCaptain(m): 6:04pm On Aug 19, 2017
Remember this phone where they bombed a car, he wanted to save his brother, a catholic church.. I don forget the title.
RomanceRe: List The Romancelanders You Will Like To Fuvk by ClassCaptain(m): 1:55pm On Aug 19, 2017
Rainred
LiteratureRe: Lilyjoe Wins Nairaland 200-Word Competition by ClassCaptain(m): 6:36pm On Aug 16, 2017
Entry By Classcaptain 6 37pm



............................................................................................

A DATE WITH A NAIRALANDER

Few months ago, A Nairalander I really liked contacted me. I immediately entered a joyful mood. For the first time in 6 months, I rushed outside to buy malt which I mixed with condensed peak milk to celebrate this legendary feat. We fixed a date and I hurriedly called some friends and borrowed 5000.

ON the ‘D’ day, I charged my phone full hoping to take pictures and post on NL with this lady. Haven soaked my shirt in starch three days before and with a very good charcoal iron, I made sure my clothes were ‘gaithored’.With my brown sebago, and 250 naira ‘folce’ and gabbana glasses, I set out for the date.

I got in waiting for her only to see a lady in Mercedes cl 2016 parking in front of the restaurant. I was already looking for a backdoor to escape ‘sharpaly’ when she suddenly entered and sighted me. With a wide smile, she gave me a warm hug as my heavy northerner perfume entered her nostrils...

‘Is that your car beside the blue van outside ? that green one ?-She said as she balanced on the chair and hot salty sweat started dripping from my face immediately.



cc wanderlustafrik
12 Likes 8 Shares
LiteratureRe: How I Lost A 150k Per Month Job because of a Cockroach !!! by ClassCaptain(op): 10:41pm On Aug 12, 2017
kayjee101:
Una no even ask where d cockroach from comaut. D tin comaut frm either him cloth or him briefcase. him bin dey haus wetin him dey fear. Funny, bro.
final.episode in a bit !!!!
LiteratureRe: How I Lost A 150k Per Month Job because of a Cockroach !!! by ClassCaptain(op):
Final.Episode in A bit grin
LiteratureRe: How I Lost A 150k Per Month Job because of a Cockroach !!! by ClassCaptain(op):
Episode 6

Five


And that was how everything started moving smoothly. Basic questions, all those ish they said on nairaland, how much salary and everything i rehearsed for.. They were all so amazed at my level of know how and it was almost a sure yes for me.

As dem dey ask, I dey give them left right center hot hot..I knew that the interviewers were indeed satisfied ..


We were almost concluding the interview when a strange brown coloured cockroach appeared from nowhere.

What is that huh
A cockroach.. the 2nd interviewer stated..

Leave it , haha .. let us round with Mr boo osin ..
No no no... lets kill it please

I was already vibrating where i sat down as i stared at the monstrous cockroach.

Please lets kill it.
.
The interviewer was about standing up to kill the insect when the other guy called him back

No no no, mr boo please kill the insect for us...
Sir !!!!
Please help us kill the insect..
I cant do it sir ..
Are you joking or kidding us ?? the man asked seriously

I cant sir..

They looked at each other truthfully shocked..

You see,, i was...

I couldn't finish my statement when the giant black cockroach flew towards my direction and i let out the loudest scream i ever made in a long while , shifting away totally from my chair and trashing the table papers right in their faces. The look on their faces was the most bizarre reaction i have seen in years..

"Yee..yee.yee"

I said as i ran around the room trying to avoid the cockroach as the interviewers looked on.. Not untill the interviewer stood and smashed the cockroach with his shoe.

I heaved a sigh of relief obviously embarrassed by my recent idiotic behaviour.

I can explain ,, i can explain... that was all i could say as i looked into the eyes of the interviewers to see if I can get some understanding some from them.
42 Likes 6 Shares
LiteratureRe: How I Lost A 150k Per Month Job because of a Cockroach !!! by ClassCaptain(op): 2:11pm On Aug 12, 2017
HawkToBar:
Repin' #TeamBooOshin
grin
LiteratureRe: How I Lost A 150k Per Month Job because of a Cockroach !!! by ClassCaptain(op): 4:25pm On Aug 11, 2017
Okaakoko:
Classcaptain the king of swag
Final episode in a bit..

Ginger your swaga
LiteratureRe: How I Lost A 150k Per Month Job because of a Cockroach !!! by ClassCaptain(op): 4:21pm On Aug 11, 2017
cc lalasticlala, Dominique
2 Likes 1 Share
LiteratureRe: How I Lost A 150k Per Month Job because of a Cockroach !!! by ClassCaptain(op): 9:02pm On Aug 10, 2017
Episode 4

As expected, i did not meet a lot of people .. This was the grand finale of the job recruitment process and i expected that a lot of people will be dropped .. Nobody knew who was going to be picked in the next stage ... every one that proceeded to this last interview was simply sent a congratulatory text message and date for final interview and venue was included therein.

Out of the 13 candidates that we rocked the last stage together, i could see only four other people here, including me making five.

We greeted each other and congratulated one another on proceeding to the next stage . We got briefed by one of the staffs ... And the interview began in proper .


While I was waiting for the interview , i was busy with my phone rehearsing likely questions and suitable answers , checking Nairaland for interview tips and also wondering what thoughts will be going through Ay's mind right now ,wherever he is ..... obviously he couldn't make it to this final stage and he might blame me for that but o boy ......

WHO CARES ??/



EVERYONE was smiling out of the interview and from my interactions with the interviewed candidates , the question were considerably simple and straightforward .. Some questions about the company , some current affairs question like which country has not seen her president for six months and some questions about the candidate and bla bla bla.

The questions are simple my guy, simple basic questions about the company , your aims, salary and .....

This was the assertion of everyone coming out of the interview


Cup of cake ... i thought to myself....

Dadubule by Skaliey blasted into my ears ,as I glorified the name of the Lord for fighting the battle ahead of me and the fact that I have won already .,,,(.I cannot post the lyrics for obvious reasons ...Alakobas )

......................


Finally it was my turn.. i could see the remaining candidates looking at my swag and feeling me as i bounced in with an A+ confidence. I could see the girls licking like lips and smiling at me like " This cute guy don get this job already " ..


Boo osin..
Yes sir....
Omo this your suit na die.... the interviewer started on a jovial note..

Haa God don butter my bread.

ikra Ka ka
46 Likes 7 Shares

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