@tufe
maybe i was working at the hospital then,,,,

after a acting a horror drama on stage,all the actors and actresses came forward,in their costumes,remove their mask and introduce themselves to the audience.when it was Wowo's time,he only introduced himself.the audience started shouting "remove your mask" he replied "this is my face" (na so my face be!!!!) sounds funnier in pidgin lol

A man was told to transfer 20 mad men from a psychiatric hospital in Abuja to another in Lagos.on the way,he stopped to ease himself by the roadside,,,unfortunately,all the mad people escaped and ran into the bush.the driver thought of what to do,because he has to deliver 20 mad people in Lagos.he came up with an idea!!! on getting to the next city,he parked d bus and started shouting "lagos,lagos #100{100 naira}" see how people fought their way into the bus!! He took them all to the hospital,and they all started protesting "please we are not mad" a guy among them even gave his mother's phone number,for confirmation.the mother came to the hospital,and when her son told her how it all happened,she broke down in tears and said to the doctor "please take good care of him,he must be very mad to board a bus from all the way from kogi state to lagos FOR JUST 100NAIRA"
       WHAT DO You THINK? ARE THEY MAD?

very nice joke,but d guy should be happy his "chlen" was swollen

@emperoh na you sabi

@poster pls can you explain how she managed to be bitten on d breast?

yeah,,nigerian,yoruba

;d ;d ;d ;d ;d

2nd year,how is it like in your school?

yeah,funny, i'm a also medical student,i pity the patient being operated on

Marriage Software
>
>This is what a guy wrote to our systems analyst
>(Marriage Software Division):
>
>Dear Systems Analyst,
>
>I am desperate for some help! I recently upgraded my program from
>Girlfriend
>7.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that the new program began unexpected Child
>Processing and also took up a lot of space and valuable resources.
>
>This wasn't mentioned in the product brochure. In addition Wife 1.0
>installs itself into all other programs and launches during systems
>initialization and then it monitors all other system activities.
>
>Applications such as "Boys' Night out 2.5" and "Golf 5.3" no longer
run,
>and crashes the system whenever selected. Attempting to operate
selected
>"Saturday Rugby 6.3" always fails and "Saturday Shopping 7.1" runs
instead.
>I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background whilst attempting to
run
>any of my favorite applications. Be it online or offline.
>
>I am thinking of going back to "Girlfriend 7.0", but uninstall doesn't
work
>on this program. Can you please help?
>
>, AND THIS IS WHAT OUR ANALYST SAID:
>
>Dear Customer,
>
>This is a very common problem resulting from a basic misunderstanding
of
>the functions of the Wife 1.0 program. Many customers upgrade from
>Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 thinking that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITY
AND
>ENTERTAINMENT
>PROGRAM. Actually, Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM designed by its
Creator
>to run everything on your current platform.
>
>You are unlikely to be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back
to

>Girlfriend 7.0, as Wife 1.0 was not designed to do this and it is
>impossible to uninstall, delete or purge the program files from the
System
>once it is
>installed.
>
>Some people have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but have
ended
>up with even more problems. (See manual under Alimony/Child Support
and

>Solicitors' Fees).
>
>Having Wife 1.0 installed, I recommend you keep it Installed and deal
with
>the difficulties as best as you can. When any faults or problems
occur,

>whatever you think has caused them, you must run the,
>
>C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE Program and avoid attempting to use the
>*Esc-Key for it will freeze the entire system.
>
>It may be necessary to run C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE a number of
times,
>and eventually hope that the operating system will return to normal.
>
>Wife 1.0, although a very high maintenance programme, can be very
>rewarding.
>To get the most out of it, consider buying additional Software such as
>"Flowers 2.0" and "Chocolates 5.0" or "HUGS\ KISSES 600.0" or
"TENDERNESS\
>UNDERSTANDING 1000.0" or even Eating Out Without the Kids 7.2.1" (if
Child
>processing has already started).
>
>DO NOT under any circumstances install "Secretary 2.1 " (Short Skirt
>Version)
>or "One Nightstand 3.2" (Any Mood Version), as this is not a supported
>Application for Wife 1.0 and the system will almost certainly CRASH.
>
>BEST WISHES!
>
>Yours, Systems Analyst.

Peter called his doctor's office for an appointment.
"I'm sorry," said the receptionist, "we can't fit you in for at least two weeks."
"But I could be dead by then!"
"No problem. If your wife lets us know, we'll cancel the appointment. "

==========

Patient: Nurse, I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes.
Nurse: Have you seen a doctor?
Patient: No, just spots.

========

Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery:

Oops!
Has anyone seen my watch?
That was some party last night. I can't remember when I've been that drunk.
Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
Well this book doesn't say that, What edition is your manual?
OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
Come back with that! Bad Dog!
Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
Hand me that, uh, that uh, thingy
If I can just remember how they did this on ER last week.
Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
Damn, there go the lights again,
Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of 'em.
Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off.
I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
Steril, shcmeril. The floor's clean, right?
What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change!
What do you mean, he's not insured?
This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
What do you mean "You want a divorce"!
I don't know what it is, but hurry up and pack it in ice.
Let's hurry, I don't want to miss "Bay Watch"
That laughing gas stuff is pretty cool. Can I have some more of that?
Hey Charlie, unzip the bag on that one, he's still moving.
Did the doctor know he would look like that afterwards?
Of course I've performed this operation before, Nurse!
FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!

a dialogue between Natasha-a 4yr-old russian girl and her father
                 
             Natasha;- i'll love to work in siberia(the coldest city in russia) when i'm older
                     
                   Father;-that's nice

                   Natasha;-you know i have to start preparing for that,,

                   Father;-yes,but how?

                   Natasha;-by eating ice cream everyday!!

---

     and this between a gal and her 3yr-old sister
   
                 
                   girl;-what are u doing?

                   sister;-i am writting a letter to my friend

                   girl;-but u can't write yet

                   sister;-no problem,my friend also can't read

st. theresa's cath. nur/pry schl,ikole ekiti
st. mary's gals' gramm schl ,, ,,
egbeoba high school
fed, poly ado ekiti
UNAD,
and now in russian state med. uni., moscow
any old student of my pry, and sec. schl around?