Broses and Aunties in the house, pardon my frequent. delay, my schedule can be very time consuming. No be say I wan make una dey count on top my head. Notwithstanding... pls expect more updates..


Best Regards,
Davidflo.

GCE was to begin the next Monday and I had done the best I could to prepare myself for it. Bauchi assisted me by asking me random questions at night. It was a peculiar sight seeing him with a booklet of past questions in on hand and a roll of blunt on the other hand. The fact that he was usually naked was not n issue anymore. The goat was the only other member of our clique, he was growing fatter and fine. Bauchi decided against taking it for mating with Baba Hafusa’s goats, he suspected that had STDs.
I overheard an argument between Kiki and Bauchi on the Sunday preceding my exams. It was one of those nights when she screamed his name because she was Hot. He excitedly ran to her room but 5 minutes later, the house was filled with their voices, not the erotic kind of noises, but voices suggesting that things were not alright. I tiptoed to hear clearly.

“Will you kiss me if I do what you want?” he screamed
“Na kiss dey worry you, yes I will kiss you,” she replied.
“French or plain kiss?”he asked
“Igbo kiss”.
The reply knocked me off my feet; I had to stop myself from falling with laughter.
“what, Igbo kiss is sweet o,” she continued.
“dem don kiss you igbo kiss?” Bauchi asked.
“No but I can imagine it.”
There was a moment of incoherent mumblings between them, I was about to go back when I heard her clearly.
“Bauchi, I don’t love you anymore. Get used to it.”
“Who do you love?”
“Nobody, I want to be free now.”
“You are a fucking liar, one small boy don dey straff you for school abi?” his voice was higher than I had ever heard.
What I heard was a slap, it must have been a slap.
“Don’t you ever hit me again, in your life!” Bauchi screamed.
What I heard was another slap.
I wanted to break into the room and stop them from what was an impending doom. I could hear them struggle with each other. He hadn’t expected the next slap. They kept struggling and I was just bidding my time before separating them, then I heard her scream.
It was not the kind of scream I was expecting to hear. So I moved closer.
“Whooooooooooooahhh, I...am...not...even....weeeeeeeet,” she moaned.
“but....you...like...it....right?” he asked her..
I didn’t hear the reply; the only sound was Bauchi ramming Kiki on the bed.
His grunting increased, she was making sounds that suggested she was close to climaxing.
“Don’t cum inside me,” it was more of pleading.
More grunts, more bed shaking, then he groaned and she sighed. I tiptoed back to my room.

When he came back some minutes later, he was looking dejected.
“Bros howfar na, what’s wrong?”
He sat on my bed with his bare ass, his head bowed. I felt bad.
“kiki no want me again, that girl don fvck me up!”
“She no want you like how?”
“She say she don dey with one Yoruba boy now,” he said, raising his head up.
“Which state are you from, Bauchi?”
He looked at me like I was a slowpoke.
“Na my state of origin be the issue here abi?”
“Why you come dey tell me the tribe of her new bf?”
“Chai, are you with me or against me, did I say him be her bf?”
“But you say she dey with am, na?”
He hissed at me.
“Because dem don dey kiss, no mean say na her bf. I am her bf.”
“Ok boss,” I humbly replied.
“When you dey finish your paper tomorrow?”
“5:30,” I said.
“Good, we dey go visit the guy. Me, you and Odogwu.”
I didn’t like the idea.
“What if I no wan go?” I asked.
He looked at me and laughed, plucking strands of hairs from his beard.
“You go follow me go, you be my man.”
This was the beginning of the end, in ways I never knew, and believe me, you never can imagine.

Emperortj93:
Bauchi and davidflo just made my sunday wic happen to be my birthday

nice update. Keep 'em coming

Happy birthday Bros.

Three weeks to the start of GCE, Kiki and Bauchi were still at loggerheads with each other, Ezekiel hated his guts, and he didn’t seem to care. I was his only ally in the house and it was something I felt comfortable about.
Oge’s protruding stomach was getting noticeable; her wedding ceremony with bros Emma was the next Saturday. Tope and Ugo were around briefly, I was very happy to be with them again.
Ugo complained about the dilapidated state of the Police College, he told us stories of having to defecate in the bush and sometimes go days without bathing because there was no water and the well was dry. He described the opulence of the senior rank and how the money from the federal government never filtered to the bottom. He said he fully understood why cops collected 20Naira on the streets from commuters. It was a process of our bosses collect from the government, we collect from the people.
Tope on the other hand was still the same, except that he had a new friend. Her name was Uju, she was a law student like he was. She visited him while we sat in a bar by Zone A car park. I was surprised when she walked in; I think Ugo was also because we didn’t believe tope could score a girl as cute as that.
“Guys, meet my queen and life,” he said, blushing as she sat beside him.
Bauchi had taught me to stand when a girl was on her feet or has just entered a room in which I am, so I stood to shake her. Ugo just followed suit like a zombie.
“Nice to meet you, I have heard so much about you,” I said, though I didn’t know anything about her. She smiled gladly.
We ordered Maltina for her while the others took their Lagers; I was in love with Guinness. I kept stealing glances at Uju, didn’t she see what we saw or was she blind?
“My man!” a voice screamed that was unmistakably Bauchi’s. With him was a guy that we all knew in the area, his name was Odogwu. Odogwu was short, black and pot bellied. He was also a notorious Igbo seller who found himself in the police then regularly. Mothers used him as a warning to their children...’you will end up like Odogwu if you don’t take time’, ‘that boy has started smoking igbo like Odogwu’, those were just a few.
Though we had grown, we still feared him; I was equally shocked when Bauchi led him to our table. They joined us with their seats with no invitation.
“Oh my God, sweet banana,” Bauchi said kissing Uju on the extended hand she had expected to receive a handshake with.
“Hello,” she said.
Tope unconsciously placed his left hand on his temple.
“This your skin fine die, abi Odogwu?” Bauchi asked his semi drunk friend.
“Nna meeeen, she fresh die, if no be say anything like that, I for just chance am from this men dem.”
Tope let out something that was supposed to be a laugh but came out more as a shriek.
“Bros Bauchi, na my guy chic o,” I quickly added.
“Ahn ahn, we know na, we are just paying compliments, though I must admit she is as fine as the devil’s mistress.”
Uju hiccups came from nowhere.
I guess she started feeling uncomfortable because she excused herself to leave after a while, Odogwu wanted to leave to so Bauchi saw him off, telling me to wait for him so that we could go home together.
“That Bauchi guy is strange,” Ugo said, taking a cup from his second bottle.
“Make sure you arrest him as soon as you have the license to.”
“For what offence, specifically?” Ugo asked.
I thought about all Bauchi had told me, about what he had done and still does.
“Just arrest him for being Bauchi,” I said, chuckling.
He looked at me with penetrating gaze; he must have thought there was something I was trying to say. I changed the topic.
“So your sister is getting married this weekend?”
“Yes, my little sister is. I don’t like Emma, but I’m glad he didn’t deny the pregnancy.”
“Yes, he took responsibility.”
“Well he is the only person to have slept with her, so he had to,” he added.
I almost choked on the black brew.
“True...very true,” I said looking at the bottle in front of me.
Tope came back and some minutes later, Bauchi entered too.
He ordered the barman to give him another bottle. We had exhausted the money we brought t the bar, so I told him I was sorry and wouldn’t be able to pay for his beer.
“Oh Fifi, after all I had taught you, you are not guided,” he said, opening the very could stout.
I couldn’t remember this particular lesson, I swear.
“Guys, please if there is nothing you learn from drinking in this filthy bar, learn that whenever you go to drink, always have extra for your friends that might stumble in, because it is wrong to deny a true friend a drink.”
We nodded.
“There is a tale about Ogun, the god of iron that I want to share with you. He was still a man then. He went to farm and on his way back he saw a house in a distance, in front of the house was a bench and on the bench was a calabash.”
I loved Bauchi’s stories; we were all listening with rapt attention.
“Ogun was glad to see the calabash, as he was glad that he would have a drink of palm-wine before continuing his journey. On getting to the house, he saw that the calabash was empty; there wasn’t a single liquid inside.”
“So he remained thirsty?” Ugo asked.
“My Igbo brother, yes he remained thirsty, but first he called the owner of the house and when the man stepped out, he killed him and filled the calabash with his blood. Ogun like Sango had very bad tempers as men.”
“Are you still thirsty, Sire?” Tope asked, smiling.
“My multiple coloured teeth man, I can never be angry with Fifi. He is my Niggie, forever and a day.”
That was the first time I had heard the word ‘Niggie’.
“I have some change, I can pay for your bottle,” Ugo volunteered.
“Thanks, my man. I will instead pay for what you guys have drank and what you are about to drink.”
“But we are okay,” Tope protested.
Bauchi opened his mouth like Tope had uttered an abomination.
“Guys..guys...if there is nothing else you learn from this beautiful assemblage that Yoruba men call bia palow, learn that you never refuse a bottle from a true friend, never ever do that!”
“Can we stand up and pee, sir?” Ugo asked
“Ahn ahn, of course my man, but come back before your Guinness gets hot.”
“But we don’t drink Guinnes,” Tope said.
“Oh, Guinness is the only drink I can pay for, I am sorry, ask my man, Fifi.”
I nodded.
“Barman, please bring four bottles of Big stout with four plates Nkwobi!” Bauchi screamed.
Tope excused himself to go pee too.
“Bros, why are you victimizing my friends like this?” I asked Bauchi as soon as we were alone.
He winked at me with that wicked, fascinating arrogance.
“I am just kidding, na only one-one bottle I go fit pay for sef, I lose my money for Baba-ijebu.”

I was getting tired of the fight between Kiki and Bauchi. It was more than three weeks since they had stopped talking to each other. Bauchi even mentioned his decision to leave the apartment for good. Hanatu was home for mid-term break and although she spent most of her time with Oge, I was still blessed by her presence. Oge was another story. We weren’t even in speaking terms anymore. Her love life with the ugly bros Emma (greatly exaggerated, even Kiki said he was a fine man) was now public consumption. They flirted all around the estate, from their catholic church to the Suya guy’s stand.... from the market to the salon. I don’t know if it was the pregnancy, but the stupid girl was getting finer.
The goat was yet another issue; it was growing on all of us except Ezekiel. Kiki sprayed her expensive perfumes on it. Bauchi named him ‘Rudolf’ and the name stuck. We took turns in bathing it and packing its faeces before it started to smell. Bauchi demarcated section of my parlour for it. Actually the area was the middle of my parlour. Hanatu became a fan of the white he-goat too; she was also a fan of Bauchi.
When she was leaving back for school, Bauchi gave her a ‘Ghana must go’ bag filled with provisions. He promised her that he wouldn’t marry anybody until she grew old enough to be his wife, he would wait for her. She was old enough to know he was kidding with her, but I saw she liked it. She liked the way he spoke and the way he called her Hanamama. He didn’t move around the apartment naked throughout her holiday, I saw he wasn’t comfortable about it but it was better for everybody else. Hanatu told me she didn’t like Kiki, I didn’t know if it was because her mentor, Oge didn’t like her or because she had joined the Bauchi lovers association. I became worried of the kind of guy my little sister would get attracted to when she grows.
That I say Bauchi and Kiki were still fighting just meant they didn’t talk to each other. It doesn’t mean they didn’t fvck each other. Sometimes, while we have settled to sleep, Kiki would scream his name from her room and in a jiffy, he would be gone, only for him to return moments later with a smirk on his face, some thirty minutes later. Seems as soon as he came, she pushes him out the door.
Ezekiel stopped talking to Bauchi since he was forced to spend the night with Rudolf. He was the only one enjoying the malice in the apartment because Kiki made it a point of duty to serve him the biggest portion of her meals even though, Bauchi dropped the money used. I seldom did.

“How did you meet Kiki?” I asked him one of those nights when he slept beside me.
“My man, I met Kiki a long time ago,” He said smacking his lips.
“Her father was this military officer that needed a driver, they lived in Ikotun then, she was in Secondary school. I had just freshly dropped out of the university and needed food to survive. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen but our age difference was an issue. Another issue was the fact that she was from an affluent home and I was a common driver.”
The story was getting interesting.
“So how did you ask her out?”
“Patience my man, we will get there.”
I was actually patient, I didn’t mind if he spoke all night.
“You see, while I was the driver, they had a Guard and a maid. Her mother was n Obese, rude, awful lady with the maddest ass on this side of the Atlantic but this is not about her mother, right, my man?”
“Not at all bros.”
“I liked her since the moment I saw her but I was too scruffy looking. Plus she had many boys sneaking into the premises when her folks weren’t around, guys in the university sef. So I doubted if she ever felt same. But the Guard brought it to my notice one day that Kiki looked at me with pleasure in her eyes. That guy dey crase but this isn’t about the guard, right, my man?”
“No, sir.”
“The Guard said my meat was usually the biggest and she was always very polite to me. I thought it was because was slightly educated. One day, I saw her crying in the compound, I felt she was lonely as her people had travelled, so I took out her father’s 504 and drove her around town. See that day, I spoilt her. Her first alcohol and her first clubbing happened that day. You can ask her.”
“I believe you.”
“When we got back to the house in the early hours of the morning, after pleading with her not to tell her father, she asked me why I wasn’t interested in knowing why she had been crying. I told her I felt it was because she was alone. She said she had been molested by one of the guys that came around earlier. He had forcefully fondled her breast and almost fingered her. My man, if there is nothing you remember from what I tell you, please remember that a woman’s ‘no’ is no! Even if her body is saying yes, as long as you hear the word ‘stop’, stop touching or entering her.
“Okay,” I replied.
“I listened to her and told her it was alright, we should be glad that she wasn’t raped. That was when I heard whosaaaai on my face. She said how dare I say she wasn’t raped, that the guy had raped her soul. I apologised and went to the BQ, my supposed wonderful night was over. Some hours later, around 4am I heard a knock on the door, I expected it to be the Guard who liked to beg for weed at odd hours. It wasn’t the guard, it was Kikelomo.”
I am ashamed to say I was getting aroused.
“So she said she came to apologise and all, she came with fried chicken in plastic plates but we didn’t get to eat it as I don’t know what came over me but I kissed her full on the lips. She didn’t respond and I was already regretting my boldness when she opened her month. She lost her final virginity that morning.”
“You be bad guy oh.”I said admiringly.
“Few weeks later, her mother caught her in my room, sitting on my leg. Her father chased me away with a loaded pump-action. I didn’t take one shirt sef out of the house”

“You guys have been dating since them?”
“Yes, my good man.”
Just as he wanted to continue, he heard her scream his name.
“Gimme 1 hour, make I go, come back”
More like 30 minutes, but I kept that to myself, which guy doesn’t want to believe he lasts longer?

Something that I couldn’t fathom had changed about me as I strolled with Bauchi back to the flat. Listening to him tell me stories about hustle and the thin line between being good and bad struck many cords in my soul.
Before we entered our flat, he excused himself, saying he had something to do. I wasn’t actually looking forward to him sleeping in the same room with me, naked.
Kiki and Ezekiel were in the sitting room when I walked in. The faint aroma of lipton tea filled the air. They ignored me as I approached, but I didn’t blame them, after all I was in camp devil.
“Kiki, Twinnie of life, howfar?”
She eyed me in a way that only girls could.
“Hope you people spent the money well, because the lord of hosts will surely take it back from you,” Ezekiel said.
I could see he was enjoying his new found closeness with Kiki.
“Kiki, I am sorry,” I said.
“Kiki is he really sorry?” Ezekiel asked like I wasn’t in the room.
“I have been watching him since that beast called Bauchi entered this apartment, Fifi is lost.”
“Don’t call Bauchi a beast,” Kiki said.
I sat down beside her; I was enveloped in her sweet fragrance.
“You betrayed me, Fifi,” she said, standing up to get her kettle of Lipton tea.
I quickly followed her.
“I didn’t, I just did all that for the sake of peace. Moreover, I am sure he is sorry. Bauchi is a good guy.”
“What? He has bribed you with part of the loot. You are actually saying Bauchi is a good guy?”
“He is. He might be unrefined but he is.”
I caught a faint smile on her lips as I talked about Bauchi. She was really in love with the dude.
“Where is the idiot?” she asked.
“I don’t know, but he should be back soon.”
“I left a plate of spaghetti for both of you, it’s not much but then, it’s part of your punishment.”
“You are the best, Kiki.”
I hugged her from behind, my crotch perfectly fitting in between her bums. My hands went round her waist. It was a harmless action but my senses caught up on their own, I lingered a while longer before detaching myself. She had the softest bum ever. I wondered if she wore any panties.
When Bauchi came into the apartment, I was already in my room while Kiki and Ezekiel were igniting their new fund friendship in the parlour. I heard ‘Jesus!’ and fearing for Ezekiel’s safety, I ran to the parlour as fast as my legs could take me.
In front of Kiki was Bauchi holding a He-goat and prophesying his undying love for her.
“Bauchi, are you making fun of me, how would you buy me a goat?”
“Totally unacceptable, you buy a girl a flower or a perfume, never a goat!” Ezekiel said from the new position he was as he was apparently scared of the goat.
I wasn’t scared of the goat or had any problems if Bauchi wanted to buy his girlfriend a freaking pig, what bugged me was the fact that the goat seemed to be suffering from diarrhoea and was dropping pellets of faeces all over my floor.
“Kiki, I am sorry. It was a lapse of Judgement on my side. It will never repeat itself again,” Bauchi pleaded.
Kiki stood up and left for her room, leaving the goat, Bauchi, Ezekiel and I.
“Brother Bauchi, I know right now you regret your actions, can I ask when I would be getting my money back?”
“You will get it as soon as Jesus comes. I hear you tell all the children in the Block that it won’t be long, right?”
“You are a beast!” Ezekiel replied then fumed into his room with his oversized trousers that only a very tight belt held in place.
“Bros, how we go do this goat now?”
“I no understand, my man.”
“Are you going to return it or are we going to kill and eat it?”
He shook his head as if I had said the most incredulous thing ever.
“Fifi my fine man, if you forget anything wey I tell you today, no forget say I tell you say, never like any particular girl too much. But if the gods curse you and you find yourself in that perilous position, don’t ever let her know. Kiki is my biggest problem in this life and probably till afterlife.”
Many a time, I wondered how Bauchi processed his thoughts; I wondered how he saw life. From all I have been able to decipher, he was a street boy that didn’t live according to norms. But I wondered why he sounded so philosophical, I didn’t agree with most of his sayings but I still found them interesting.
“Bros, you never answer me oh. Wetin we go do with this goat?”
“It is a symbol of my love for Kiki, we nurture it till she allows me back into her life and pants,” he said with a wink.
He tried one last time to enter her room but she didn’t open the door to him, so he pulled of his clothes as usual and joined me inside mine.
We could hear the goat bleating, it was annoying. Bauchi doesn’t clean the house. Kiki did, with most of her attention in the kitchen. Ezekiel did his bit. I doubted if any of them was going to pack the goat shit in the morning.
Bauchi had headphones on, that was the only thing he had on listening to D’banjs ‘Tongolo’. It was loud I could hear him.
I tapped him angrily telling him I couldn’t sleep with all the sounds the goat was making. He apologised and went to get it. The next thing I knew, Ezekiel’s door was opened, he took the guy’s key from the keyhole, pushed the goat inside and locked the door from outside the room.
“Jesus, precious blood of Jesus what is this?” Ezekiel screamed.
Bauchi came back to the room with Ezekiel’s key in his grasp.
“Oh my lord, this is enough, enough is enough. Why am I being so persecuted by wicked men of this world, oh my lord!”
Bauchi settled down beside me, his headphones were back on. I could hear Ezekiel pace around the room, the goat’s bleat seemed to coincide with the prayers his roommate was saying.
After threatening fire and brimstones, with no much success, he started begging.
“Bauchi forgive me, please open the door. Forget about the money, just open the door. This goat is shitting everywhere.”
Only if he knew that Bauchi was snoring.
He banged the door, crashed on it a couple of times to force it open then he gave up.
“Unto thee O’lord do I lift up my soul ....” he sang into the night




twenty-sixthed.

labaski:
u can never be too sure bout dat.. unfortunately I'm not losing interest..

and btw, davidflo, do u want us to organize a search party for u?? I tire for ur matter ooo..

u found me.

I had to get a Taxi for Ene to go home. We were both bruised, she was too weak t go to the bus stop to board a bus. I was exhausted myself, when I asked her if she wasn’t going to see her boyfriend again, she hissed at me. I took that as a ‘no’.
Kiki was back from classes when I returned, she was making noodles. Bauchi was still on the couch, he wasn’t naked. Ezekiel was not back.
“Your friend is still not talking to me,” Bauchi said as I sat down beside him.
“Have you begged her?”
“Yes na, I followed her to school sef, she ignored me like I was one toaster.”
“Get her gift.”
He stood up and looked at himself.
“Am I not a gift myself?”
Such cockiness was why he would sleep in my room one more night.
Kiki came to the parlour with two plates of noodles. Bauchi sat down and quickly put a stool in front . She ignored him and instead offered me the plate.
The look Bauchi gave me was scary and funny at the same time. I really wanted to eat her food. Ene had sapped all my energy. But I had to obey the bro code.
“I am alright, kiki.”
“You don’t want to eat because of Bauchi, right?”
He was smiling sheepishly, tugging at his beards.
“No, I ate earlier, thanks,” I replied.
“You will remain hungry.”
Luckily for me, Ezekiel made a gallant entry. He immediately greeted sister Kiki before noticing us.
“You must be hungry, Ezekiel,” she said giving him the plate of noodles filled with sardines and a boiled egg.
“Ah! You are blessed sister. Your barn shall be filled like that of Jacob.”
Ezekiel didn’t need to sit down before he started eating the food.
Kiki smiled delightfully and walked room. I don’t know if she did it on purpose, but her bum bounced a lot more than it usually did.
Bauchi waited till she had left before pouncing on Ezekiel.
“You know say na my food you dey chop, ba?”
“No na, Fifi, weren’t you here when she gave me the food?”
I kept quiet, Ezekiel became tensed.
“Bro Fifi, is this Bro Bauchi’s food?” he asked me, the gulped seem heavier.
I nodded.
He looked at Bauchi and wanted to talk but kept quiet. He slowly walked to his room. Bauchi followed him inside, I did too.
“Bauchi, allow me change my clothes, I will cook beans for you, Very sweet oh!”
I laughed looking at Bauchi who couldn’t contain himself, he started laughing too.
“Na your papa you go cook that your fvcking beans for.”
“Bauchi, in your life, don’t ever mention my father!” Ezekiel shouted.
Bauchi had never looked taller, I watched with amazement as he lifted Ezekiel from his feet.
“Help me, Help me, Help me!” Ezekiel screamed.
Kiki ran into the room with a spatula, immediately she saw Ezekiel’s head close to the ceiling fan, she started hitting Bauchi.
“Leave the poor boy, is he the one that said you should not be able to control your wandering phallus?”
Bauchi put his hand inside Ezekiel’s pocket and brought out three 1000Naira notes.
“That is the money for the chorister’s clothes, don’t touch it. Don’t you dare!”
“Fifi, make we go chop for G.R.A.”
“Fifi, don’t go with him, let him go by himself,” Kiki said.
Once again I had to obey the bro code.
“Bauchi, surely, u will not make heaven!” Ezekiel screamed as we left the house.

I expected us to go to a restaurant but I met myself at a bar. I didn’t know how long Bauchi had stayed in the Estate prior to moving into the apartment but he was popular. Mama Chinonso hailed him as soon as she saw him. The girls serving wasted no time coming to our table.
“As usual?” a fair dimpled one with large head asked.
“Yes, Angela, for me and my man here.”
She nodded happily and went to the backyard that served as the kitchen.
“Fifi, you are a young boy but I have been watching you. You are very mature for your age. You will go far in life. I liked the way you stood by me today. Kiki indomie na wash sef , abi?”
“Not really,”I replied.
“Well thats not the point. The point is that you are my man and I will show you things, expose you to stuffs that will make you a man.”
“stuffs like what?” I asked
“Stuffs that would make you a Player.”
“A player?”
“Yes, a player. You will be able to control everything around you.”
“Sounds interesting. You mean you can control everything round you?”
“Yes, he replied.”
“So how come you didn’t stop the policemen from arresting you?”
“How come the son of man sacrificed himself and died in the cross. Sometimes you allow things to happen for a greater reason.”
I thought it was all hogwash, but I feigned interest.
The big headed girl came with two bottles of Big stout and two plates of cow-tail.
“I don’t drink Guiness,” I said, telling the girl to take it back and bring a Lager beer.
“Why?” he asked.
“Its bitter,” I replied.
“That because you don’t know how to drink it. Now, talk a gulp, you don’t drink beer with the front of your tongue, you do it with the back and your throat.”
I looked at him, his weirdly brown eyes were burying into mine. He looked like a bad boy with his rough beards hanging on his face but I could see why Kiki liked him. He was unique. He was different.
“Let the drink roll and fall in your throat, there is nothing more satisfying.”
He poured a glass of the black drink into my cup. I did as I was told, making sure I dulled the senses in the front of the tongue. I didn’t feel any difference. It was still bitter.
“better right?” he asked.
“Nope, same,” I replied.
He smiled and drank his. That was when I felt the difference. The smell of the drink enveloped me, the lingering taste tasted like bitter chocolate. Suddenly I wanted to try another cup, and I did. It was full and refreshing, the bitterness was their but it was satisfying.
I called the girl who served us earlier.
“Please bring back the Guinness.”
He raised his glass and hailed the man I had become.

I was relieved to wake up to an empty bed. Apart from the fact that he was naked, his snoring had kept me awake for most of the night.
Kiki was not in the house, Ezekiel also. I decided to use the opportunity to study; I couldn’t afford to fail again. The more I studied, the more I realised that I really had no reason to fail like I did the last time. Most of what I read was stuffs that I was asked in the Exams. Secondary school was probably a waste of time, I should have just armed myself with this past questions and I would be good to go. My mind drifted to Tope and Ugo and how they would have started making new friends, I also thought of my Hanatu, I hoped she was healthy and safe.
I was getting hungry, without brushing, I put two eggs on the fire, dashed to Mama Joshua’s shop to get a sachet of Blue boat butter and 70 Naira Agege bread. I had a visitor waiting for me when I got back to the house, she was by my door.
“Ene, what are you doing here?”
She had changed a bit from the last time I was at her place and couldn’t get it up. Her breastz looked fuller, her bum bigger.
“Is that how to welcome someone? mtchwww.”
I hugged her.
“Sorry, I was just surprised to see you.”
I led her into the apartment.
“You have changed,” I said as we sat on the couch.
“You too. Is that a goatee on your chin, three strands?”
We both laughed. Ene still had the exotic sexy look. But you didn’t need to be told she was sexually active.
“How far with your admissions?”
Before she could reply, I remembered my eggs, so I excused myself and went to get them.
I had heard rumours that she had gotten admission into UNILAG, the dream school of any girl that wanted to be seen as ‘BIG’. Of recent though, University of Ado-Ekiti had began to surface.
“Would you eat with me?” I asked.
“No, I eat only once a day, this shape is not going to maintain itself.”
“Alright,” I said in-between large chunks of bread torn by my teeth.
“So, when are you resuming in the University?”
“my admission in UNILAG bounced, so I have decided to school in Ghana.”
“Which one?”
“Zenith University.”
“Why not the other private schools in Nigeria?”
She smiled.
“I want to explore outside Nigeria.”
More like explore Ghanaian preeq, I said to myself.
“Who are you dating now?”
“I have been single since you broke my heart,” I replied.
“Aww, so sweet.”
“What of you, how is your boyfriend?”
“He is fine, schooling in UNILAG. He just bought a car.”
I hissed in my soul.
“Oh, thats nice.”
“He stays in Zone C, I came to see him but he isn’t at home so I decided to come here instead. I Will check up on him before I go.”
Girls ehn!
We were quiet for a while.
“Do you still think about the day you came to my house?” she asked.
“No,” I lied.
“Well I do. I had wanted it for so long with you, even while we were in school. Its a pity the last chance we had was futile.”
“Who says it’s the last chance,” I said jokingly.
She laughed in return, signalling that she got that it was a joke or she wanted me to remove my mind from it.
“Same thing happened to my boyfriend when he came to my house. He was very hard but as soon as I lay on my back, he became soft.”
“Maybe he was overwhelmed,” I said.
“Overwhelmed bawo, we have fvcked everywhere, even in our generator house. It just made me remember you.”
Could I bitch slap her and apologise later?
“Believe me, if I had another opportunity, I would not mess it up.”
“hehehehe, funny guy.”
It was clear I wasn’t getting any.
“I should be on my way now. I am sure he would be home now.”
“Thanks for coming around, dear.”
I escorted her down the stairs before parting with her and going back to my apartment. My preeq was turgid throughout my conversation, plus the signal she was giving was bad.
I went to the bathroom, poured two bowls of water on my head when I heard a knock on the door. It started soft but grew louder, just the way Bauchi knocked. The truth is I had missed him.
I dried myself, wrapped the towel round my waste and went to the door. I was surprised for the second time that day by the same person.
“You came back?”
“Shut up, let’s make this one count.”
She pushed me to the couch and pried my towel open. Her lips painfully crushed mine. Her hand caressed my balls, through the faint taste of blood in my mouth, I got an arousal like a stone. I dropped my hands to cup her bum, they were soft. I lost my breathe so I started breathing hard to find them.
“The door is Op...”
“Fvck the door”
She kept grinding.
Her lipstick left a bitter taste in my mouth but the sweetness of her lips made up for it. Her mouth disengaged from mine as she traced a line with her tongue downwards before capturing my deek. She started by licking the tip before she sucked it. Her lips and tongue were moving in unision, I tried grabbing her breastz but she pushed my hand away. Her left finger nails were suddenly buried on the left cheek of my bum, I reacted by plunging my preeq deeper into her mouth, it choked her. She looked at me and I at her, her eyes dared me.
I lifted her and crushed her back to the wall, she let out a cry of pain, like a wheel barrow, I separated her legs until they were on either sides of my waist. She wrapped them around me firmly. I wanted to kiss her but she slapped me, I thought it would stop but she continued. It stung like hell.
I pulled her hair from the roots, which made her stop hitting me. She tried freeing herself from my grip, I pushed her harder to the wall. I used my left hand to shift her blue lace panties to the side, then I plunged my preeq into her.
She screamed.
“Her nails scratched my face but I continued, plunging into her. She moaned like a woman who had lost her only son. I could see tears flow from her eyes mixed with satisfaction. She flung her arms around my neck, squeezing me towards her. Every jerk I made sent her back to the wall, pain and ecstasy. When she came, her movement was undeterminable, so we both collapsed on the floor, she crushed my deek with her vaginal muscles as she let of cries of satisfaction. I was almost cumming, I tried getting out but she held on to me. She said some words but the only thing I could hear was ‘safe’. That was all I needed to erupt inside her, our deep sigh coincided with each other as we finally became motionless.
When I opened my eyes some time later, a blanket hand been used to cover her. We were lying on the floor, in front of the couch. I was naked with little seminal fluids exiting my penis.
Seated on the couch was Bauchi, he had a roll of blunt between his lips as he winked at me.

I was in the parlour, going through GCE past questions when Kiki finally came out of her room. She was putting on a shirt that could only be his, her long legs swinging beneath them as she walked into the kitchen.
“I thought you would have slept, you are really studying hard,” she said, standing in front of me with a bowl of cereal.
“How can I sleep when we have an ex-convict in the house?”
She smiled and as expected, it completely disarmed me.
“Twinnie, you have nothing to be worried about, Bauchi is harmless.”
“So tell me, what was he arrested for?”
She sat down; making the shirt that was barely covering her knees become shorter.
For a slim and tall girl, she had remarkably full laps. Even her knee caps made turned me on.
“Someone owed him a great deal of money and refused to pay just because he was an influential person. All he did was visit the guy to convince him that it was necessary to pay him back there and then.”
“So what happened?”
“The man didn’t agree with him, so Bauchi took one of his cars. Days later he was arrested for car theft.”
“How long was he arrested?”
“5 months. See Fifi, I know I should have told you but you shouldn’t be worried. Bauchi is a great guy.”
I watched her bum bounce as she walked to her room.
Before long, I went to my room to sleep but was awakened by the screams of Ezekiel. Initially I didn’t flinch, I thought he was having one of his bouts with the devil but he persisted so I had to find out what was happening to our Ezekiel of life.
“Bro Fifi, what is this?” he said pointing Bauchi who had a tooth brush trapped between his lips.
The only thing that Bauchi had on was his beards. Besides that, he was stark naked.
“Good morning my man,” Bauchi said then continued with his brushing.
“Bro Fifi, I want my rent back, I have had enough.”
I sighed.
“Ezekiel, this is Bauchi, he is Kiki’s boyfriend.”
“I am not surprised. Just do and give me back the rent. I am leaving today!”
“Bauchi, where is Kiki?” I asked.
“School, she is a student. That my babe na correct girl.”
I was tempted to call Ezekiel’s bluff and give him his rent, but I didn’t want to do so because of Bauchi. But how does one tell a grown man to wear some clothes? Why should Ezekiel want to leave because he saw a naked man sef?
I left them to their drama.
Tope already had his bags packed when I got to his house. Ugo left for the police college earlier. Tope was in a bad mood cause Bose had decided to break up with him, he was gutted. School was going to be his escape route.
I was going to miss the guys, though I had prepared for the day they were going to leave and proceed with their lives, I still felt bad.
I was left with Kiki and her criminal of a boyfriend, Ezekiel and his gods, Oge and her baby daddy.

















Ezekiel didn’t leave as threatened. Bauchi was another matter though. He never saw a reason to wear his clothes around the house. I spoke to Kiki about it but she said she was powerless about stopping him from being naked. It was discomforting when he sat on the chair, balls and all. Another problem I had with Bauchi was his apparent lack of ambition. After Ezekiel and Kiki leave for classes, He brings out his endless volume of choco and starts wrapping. If there is electricity, he would play Bob Marley or Fela, telling me how they were servants of God, that used music and weed for the liberation of the soul and salvation of the common man. In a way, Ezekiel and Bauchi were fighting the same battles; they were just using different prophets.
I liked the tea he made after smoking though. It was filled with Milk and something I later found out to be seeds of weed. They were so relaxing and soothing, though I had issues with his ambition, after few gulps of the tea, we would sing along to ‘Buffalo Soldier’ or ‘I shot the sheriff” or whatever goddam song that played when the dopamine high kicks in.
You could see that Kiki was completely head over heels in love with the thick beard skinny, tall, weed smoking no gooder. But I started liking him too. In no time I was used to him being naked in the house. We even sat on the same couch sometimes. It was still awkward watching his balls dangle infront of me.
There was this night when I became very thirsty. I was about to sleep, so I forced myself to go get a sachet of water from the fridge. What I saw stopped me on my tracks. Ezekiel was looking at Kiki have her bath through a tiny hole that age had caused the bathroom door. The more he looked, the more he rubbed his groin area. I wondered how long it had been going on because I was sure Kiki took her bath most nights. I wondered if he was being led by the holy spirit to stare at the unclothedness of a woman. Unfortunately for him, Bauchi caught him also. The thing is, although I had seen Bauchi open the room door and walk to the bathroom, Ezekiel didn’t. He was lost in whatever he was staring at. I envisaged what could happen so I closed my room door and ignored the thirst I was feeling.
I expected to hear an uproar but didn’t, instead Bauchi rushed into my room excited.
“Fifi guess what?” he asked, sitting on my bed with his bare ynansh.
“What?”
“I just caught his eminence staring at my babe’s skrunus!”
Thats another thing about Bauchi, though he had a deep, low voice that many guys would envy and girls would adore, he mainly used it for nicknaming everything he could.
“What did you do to him?”
“I told him not to finish his vaseline o. He apologised and ran into his room.”
“You are not vexed?”
“You don’t get it right?”
“Get what, Bauchi?”
“His eminence is now part of us; he doesn’t just know it yet.”
He left my room with his preeq swinging anyhow. I didn’t know what he meant by Ezekiel was now part of us, I didn’t feel like I was part of any of them . My doubt was cleared some days later, when I came home to see Bauchi and Ezekiel, each with a glass of scotch. I looked closely at his cup to see if it was coke but it wasn’t.
“Why don’t you join us, Fifi. We are celebrating.”
“Ezekiel, you are drinking alcohol, wetin happen?”
He looked at me with dismay, he wanted to talk but couldn’t, I could see the drink was crashing his world.
Later I found out from Bauchi that he had assured Ezekiel that he would tell Kiki that he was staring at her when she took her bath if they didn’t share a drink together.
“You wouldn’t make heaven, you know?” I asked him.
“None of us would. Heaven is only for Marlie, Fela and Kennedy.”
“Which kennedy?”
“John Fitzgerald Kennedy.”
“Why?”
“Because he liberated the mind of the common back American before Johnson came to finish the good work.”
He was very knowledgeable.
“So you get to decide who goes to heaven?”
He smiled and resumed wrapping his jay.
In no time, Ezekiel started sipping drinks with us, started laughing at Bauchi’s sex filled jokes and surprisingly, they were getting really close. The house was at peace, even Ezekiel and Kiki were getting long well.
Then one night, while in my favourite couch, studying for my exams, I started hearing shouts in Kiki’s room. The door suddenly flung open with Bauchi running out while Kiki was close behind. He was naked as usual while Kiki was on bra and pants, in her hand was a need and a roll of thread.
“You must stitch me back up, you foolish guy, I hate you!” kiki screamed, charging to where he was.
“Fifi, Kiki has run mad o...hold her for me.”
“Bros, what did you do to her, why does she need stitches?”
“Fifi don’t mind him. I am tired of him sleeping with my friends. But he took this one too far. He slept with my cousin at her father’s burial. Her mother caught them and just called me. The idiot wanted to deny it.”
I looked at Bauchi, he was smiling.
“Kiki my baby, your cousin needed consolation; you know I don’t have any money. So I gave her my Ikolaba.”
“You see why I said you are mad. Leave my room Bauchi!”
“Okay I will leave, I will stay with my man here, Fifi.”
“I don’t have a problem but you must stitch me up o.”
I was lost for some seconds and she used that opportunity to rain different blows on Bauchi’s face. I had never seen her shout, talk less of fight. Love is not a beautiful thing.
“What is he stitching up?” I asked again
“My pvssy, he deflowered me, he must stitch it up.”
I would have laughed but I couldn’t. Bauchi made sigh to me that she was mad. She saw him and flung me out of her way before attacking him.
Bauchi swerved, escaping her clutch like fingers before dashing out of the house stark naked. It didn’t take long before our neighbours started screaming as he passed by them. I would have screamed if I saw an over 6 feet naked guy running towards me. Kiki wanted to follow suite but I stopped her.
It was about 1am when he snuck into my room and positioned himself beside me.
“My man, sorry for what happened o...woman can be unnecessarily emotional.”
“Do you love her?” I asked him
“Yes na, to heaven and back again.”
“Why did you now disrespect her like that?”
“How was I to know that the mumsi will catch us?”
“But isn’t love about being true to the person even in absence?”
“Are you in love?” he asked
“No,” I replied.
“Then we should sleep my man. Tomorrow I have to toast Kiki again.”
You are naked, we can’t sleep on the same bed.
He was already snoring.

She sneaked out of the room before the break of dawn. That was why I was surprised when Bro Ezekiel came to knock on my door around 8:20am.
“Bro Fifi, we have something very important to tell you”.
I was still feeling sleepy so I asked what it was about.
“Just come to the parlour, Kiki and I have something to say to you”.
Hearing that Kiki was involved, I followed him to the parlour.
“Twinny, what is happening?” I asked Kiki
“I don’t know Oh, he came to my door to tell me we have a meeting”, she said with her hands flung up.
She wasn’t wearing any bra and I am sure that like myself, Ezekiel knows she has very big nipplez, they usually visible beneath her braless tops.
“Brother Fifi, is there anything you want to share with your brethrens?”
I really wanted to sleep, but I indulged him.
“Like what?”
He laughed and spoke in tongues a bit, opening his mouth wide in the process.
“Do you know that of all the sins, fornication is the only sin of the flesh and is hated by God, the king of hosts?”
Kiki smiled.
“What are you talking about?”
Ezekiel produced a bible and wanted to quote a verse but was having difficulty locating it.
“Bro Fifi, you were committing the act of fornication and it is glaring that the devil is in control of your life”.
“Your Papa!” I said to him.
“Sister Kiki can you see, does our beloved brother reply me like this before?”
Kiki started laughing.
“Sister Kiki, do not laugh, Hell fire burneth with fire and brimstone. I have a problem with your name ‘kiki’, it might be the reason why you dress like the people of Sodom and Gomorrah, we must change it to a name like Mary or wait...ermmm Rachel”.
“Bros Ezekiel, can I go and sleep. The devil is not in control of my life.”
“You need deliverance my brother, what gave you that kind of spirit to fornicate all night?”
The question was awkward, so I just stood up and left.
Shortly after, Kiki breezed into my room. She had a cheeky smile at the tip of her lips.
“Was that Oge that came, don’t even bother denying it?”
“Both of you are crazy oh”.
She smiled.
“Her moaning was loud. I couldn’t sleep also”.
I was embarrassed, I dropped my gaze.
“I am sorry, I didn’t know”.
“How many rounds, 6?”
I didn’t count but I wondered what Kiki was upto. I didn’t answer her.
“Can we not talk about it? Oge wanted me to keep it a secret”.
“No problem, little man. Can you keep a secret too?”
“Yes,”I said.
She stood up and as she walked out of the room she said, “I was turned on”.


I spent most of the day and next at home, I was lagging behind in my studies and really wanted to pass my GCE. Kiki had her semester exams coming up to so we studied together. Ezekiel started calling Kiki ‘Rachel’, and for the sake of peace, she answered him.
I was about about going out that night to see Tope, when I heard a knock at the door, opening it, I saw a guy that I had never met before.
“Can I help you?” I asked
“Is this Kiki’s apartment?” he asked.
I could smell the stench of cigarette and alcohol oozing from his pores
“Yes,” I replied.
“Is she around?”
“Yes, but she is sleeping. Come back around tomorrow”.
“Tell her Bauchi is around”.
“You mean like Bauchi, the state?”
He winked at me.
The guy called Bauchi was very slim and dark but what was peculiar about him were his eyes. They were a shade of very light brown, like that of an albino. They were scary. Because he was slim and had a straight face, his beards were enormous. With long neck and small shoulders, he leaned to one side of the door.
I didn’t have to go and call her for as soon as she heard his voice she bolted out of the room and flung herself into his arms.
“When did they release you? Oh my God I have missed you, bastard!”
I was confused.
“Please, where did they release you from, bros?”
He brushed me aside as he entered MY house.
“Fifi, I am sorry. This is Bauchi. He is my boyfriend”, she said still in his arms, she adored the motherfvcker with the way she stared into his eyes.
“Released from where, Kiki?”
“Alagbon”, he replied, leading her to her room.
"The prison?"
"Yes, my man".
I wasnt his fvcking man!
They shot the door amidst giggles.
Maybe I was wrong, Maybe Ezekiel was right....Maybe demons were domiciling in my house

I waited for a long time but she did not come. I had opened the door by 10pm as she had requested. Kiki had gone to sleep while Ezekiel had said his first set of prayers. The Suya was nice, I took mine with Garri, Kiki took hers with a cup of cold Milo, Ezekiel ate his like that.
11:30pm and she was not around. I contemplated going to lock the door; I was busy making up my mind when I slept off.
She woke me up with pinch to the nose.
“So you couldn’t wait up for me?”
“You said 10pm, this is past 12, are you a witch?”
“Sorry, Ugo was in the parlour, I couldn’t leave while he was there”.
“It’s alright”
She came beneath my duvet and held my hand.
“I miss Hanatu, I am sure you do too”.
“Every time”, I said.
We shared fond memories of Hanatu; I started missing her more than I should.
“Fifi can I tell you something?”
“Whats it about?”
“Emma”, she said.
I was hoping I wouldn’t get to hear his name, but I guessed it was inevitable. I wondered if I should tell her that he wanted Kiki’s number.
“I am listening”.
“First, I am sorry that you found out the way you did. It was hard to tell you”.
“Don’t worry, I am alright now”.
‘NEPA’ took off power and steadily, the speed of the fan reduced. It became a bit hot.
“Fifi, you know I really liked you but we were stagnant and Emma came around, I thought I could just flirt a bit but I fell for him”.
That was funny, because I remembered that she insulted Emma for his philandering ways as much as we all did when he came around newly.
“I understand, Oge”.
“But you see, I still liked you and still believed our chapter was not over. That was when my dad killed somebody, accidental discharge”.
Accidental discharge my foot.
“Okay?”
“You see, his father is an AIG”.
“The person your father killed?” I was suddenly very worried for her father.
“No, Emma’s father”.
“Oh.....”
“So he met his father and they discussed how to help my Dad. See Fifi, his action made me make up my mind to stick with him. If it were your father, wouldn’t you sacrifice your all?”
“My father is dead”.
She gripped my hands harder.
“I know, but wouldn’t you have if he was alive?”
“So Emma told you to marry him for helping your dad?”
“No, not at all, He told me his actions proved that he was serious with me. So I shouldn’t insist on condoms everytime”.
“Everytime! You guys fvck like rats?”
“shut up jor. So I consented”.
“And you carry belle?”
“Yes”.
I disentangled my hand from hers. I was hurting again.
“So why are you telling me this?”
“Dad has agreed that I marry him, we have fixed a date”.
Have you hurt so much that you start laughing? Because I was lying down in the dark with a girl that I loved and she was telling me about her pregnancy and marriage.
“when?”
“25th September”.
“Why so soon?”
“We want to do it before my stomach starts protruding”.
For no clear reason I started sing one of our songs by Azadus .

............You is the one, ti mo really fe ran....
............can’t you see...
............the arrow of your love...
She sang along, I became teary eyed, she wiped my eyes, i smiled, she smiled then we kissed.
And kissed again.
She held my lower lips with her teeth and sucked it. My hands ran down her back till I cupped her bum. I caressed it and noticed she wasn’t wearing any panties. She ran her tongue on each nipple of mine then claimed my lips with hers again. Her warmth of her mouth blended with that between her legs when I folded up her gown and touched the swollen lips of her Vee. She let out a sigh of satisfaction as my other hand found her breasts. She freed herself from my grip and placed her back on the bed.
Her legs were slightly open.
“I want to feel inside me”, she said with eyes closed. Her nipples were rock hard as she pulled me closer.
“But you are pregnant”, I whispered.
“Fifi dear, shut up and fvck me”.
I obliged.
She gasped as the tip of my preeq pushed away the warm wet flesh surround the opening of her vee. Her clitz settled on top of my shaft.
“I have always wanted this with you”.
I wanted to reply but the fluids slapping on my balls with every pound, the sound of ecstasy from her lips, the way her breast jiggled with the thrusts, made me moan.
“I love you , Fifi!”
I should have told her I loved her, abi? That would have been another perfect moment.
I couldn’t.
Shortly after she came with words that I couldn’t decipher, I came also.

Apart from the fact that I thought of sex most times that I saw her, she was like an enigma. Most girls that weren’t half as beautiful as she was were as proud as hell. Kiki was more like a friend than a tenant or flatmate.
Though I felt guilty eating the food she offered me because I didn’t contribute, she reminded me that it was nothing. She says a woman is happy if her food is appreciated by people. That led to another problem, I must finish whatever food she dishes out. I never said she was a great cook, but she wasn’t bad either. I avoided her food if I wasn’t really hungry or if its white rice, she is terrible with white rice.
Kiki is slightly taller than me, slim with wide hips and curved legs. The legs ensured that her bums were always pouting. Besides her beauty, her diction was impeccable. She was the real deal and I was crushing on her.
Shortly before Ugo and Tope were to resume in their separate institutions, we were in our usual hangout, the car park, playing our usual four side football. Bros Emma was there as usual with his big belle, not being able to run as fast as the rest of us, he stands beside the opponents post, waiting to receive a pass from his hardworking team-mates so that he can score and claim the glory. He was a lousy footballer with his ugly expensive original Manchester Jersey...okay I was plain jealous.
His girlfriend, Oge, who hated football, was sitting on the bonnet of a car, cheering her boyfriend on. It was a lousy game of football for me. I kept looking at Oge and the lovely way she shouted with pride whenever her boo touched the fvcking ball.
It was a lousy game until Kiki, in all her majesty decided to grace the park. I had never seen her there before, so I was surprised when she sat on another cars bonnet with her Jackie kennedy shades, extremely short “shorts” and a tight tee-shirt. Her long legs couldn’t be over-emphasized.
She called my name and waved, I waved back at her. If I swear that all the guys stopped to look at her for a while, will you believe me? Do, because it’s true.
All of a sudden, football became a beautiful game. The strength that was gone came back; I could hear her scream goal! No matter how far my shot was off target.
The bad part of the episode was that the guys in the basket ball court suddenly had interest in football. They also had affinity for being close to the car Kiki was on. Even the big headed bros Emma decided that he was too tired, so he went to join them. Before long they started forming conversations with her.
I started hating football again, and then I noticed that Oge was equally jealous of the attention Kiki was getting.
“That your flatmate yansh no be here oh!” Tope said, sitting next to me as we removed our canvass.
“No be lie”, Ugo said, “Because of Kiki, university they hungry me too”.
I continued untying the lace of my canvass when she came around. Kiki bent down and assisted with my left foot while I was with the right.
Tope’s mouth was opened. The guys in the park kept looking our way. I felt on top of the world.
“That boy is too rough”, Kiki said, pointing to Tony.
“Very rough”, I replied.
“He kept trying to hurt you, you guys don’t have red card?”
Ugo and Tope laughed out loud.
“Its street football, no red cards”
“Oya lets go to our house”, she said, apparently not understanding why we shouldn’t play with cards. I liked the way she said ‘our house’
I stood up and she casually flung her hand around my neck as we strolled home. Bros Emma and Oge’s car zoomed pass us but I didn’t care, I was a rock star.
“The girl wearing the white dress, is that Oge?” Kiki asked as we got in.
“Yep, that’s the Oge I told you about”.
“So Emma is her boyfriend?”
“Yes”.
“He is a despicable fellow, kept asking for my number”.
“Did you give him”.
I held my breath, my world was about to be shattered.
“No, he is not my type”.
I wondered if I was her type for a split second before calling myself fool.
After taking my bath, she told us to go get Suya, I told her not to bother, that I would go myself. I could afford to buy Suya.
“Bro Fifi, please tell the Aboki not to put Tozo there oh!” Ezekiel added like he had contributed to it.
Kiki smiled and offered to pay but I declined.
Getting downstairs, I saw a particular figure approach the stairs. It was Oge.
“Where are you going to?” she asked.
“To get Suya”.
“Let’s go together”.
I shrugged and we started walking together in silence.
“I am still sorry for the other day”.
“It’s okay, I forgive you”.
“Thank you”.
We walked in silence again.
“Isn’t she too old to be your girlfriend?”
“Who?” I asked.
“Kiki”.
“She is not my girlfriend jor, plus isn’t it ironic that you are discussing age and relationship?”
She smiled.
“Yes, I guess”.
“Don’t tell me you are jealous”
She kept quiet for a while
“Yes, I’m”
Like a fool I started becoming crazy over her again.
We got the Suya and strolled back home, she insisted on seeing me to my flat.
“Can you do me a favour?”
“what favour?”
“I’m bored, I want to visit you later. Can you leave your door open around 10pm? I don’t want your flatmates to see me”
I started getting hard.
“Sure”
“See you soon, Fifi”, she said, brushing her lips against mine before disappearing into the night.

Was Oge’s stomach getting bigger?
I couldn’t tell. We were on our way to drop off Hana in boarding school; it wasn’t far away from the estate. Hanatu hadn’t been spending much time at home since the tenants moved in, she rather stayed with Oge. I had been counting days since I got her the admission. Ugo and Tope were leaving soon too, I was officially alone.
Ezekiel was another issue. He was either Praying, eating or using the toilet whenever he was around. I thought he was suffering from dysentery but as the weeks went by, I concluded it was something I had to get used to. The sounds that emanated when he was pooing was only eclipsed by his crying when he and the good lord were talking, which they normally did in the middle of the night. Although Kiki was cool with him, he chose days when to talk to her and days when he just ignored her. He always ate her food though...good days and bad.

“How are your new tenants, Oga landlord?” Oge asked as we watched Hanatu dragged a box that was almost bigger than her to her hostel.
“Fine,” I replied.
She was quiet for sometime before she continued.
“Tell me about them, Hanatu said they are two, one girl that wears bum shorts and a guy that dresses and smells funny”.
“If you want to know about them, you should come and meet them”.
She laughed.
“You want me to come to your house so you can break my head?”
I ignored the remark.
When Hanatu came out of her hostel, there were two girls on her wake.
“Who are these lovely ladies?” Oge asked, running her fingers on their head.
Their faces were covered with white powder. They were both wearing their green hostel wears.
“My new friends, Josephine and Beatrice”, Hana replied.
I gave Hana three thousand naira as pocket money, promised her I would visit her from time to time. I left the so called ‘ladies’ and went to wait for Oge at the gate.
It was more than thirty minutes later when she joined me. Although we were not in the best of terms I knew I was still crazy about her, not even the fact that she was carrying another man’s child was enough to reset my brain. The truth is that I loved her more after she left me.
“I want to go to the market; you want me to get you anything?”
“Nope”
“Fifi, I really think it’s time you let go of this animosity.”
“I don’t know what you are talking about.”
She rolled her eyes, I just wanted her to shut up.
“How far with the preparation for your GCE?”
“You should be more interested with preparation for mother-hood.”
I expected those words to spite her, but she took it well.
“Believe me, I am ready for it. Emzy will make a remarkable father.”
I walked away.


I got into the flat to see Ezekiel waiting for me. He said he wanted to go for fellowship but had to see me before he left.
“Bros, what is the problem now?”
“Your friend, Tope came around today. I told him you were not around, that he should come back later but he insisted on waiting. There was something about that guy that I wasn’t comfortable with, my spirit led me to go and pray. So I left him in the parlour and went to pray against all evil spirits in the premises.”
“So what seemed to be the problem?”
“After the prayer, I went back to the parlour to see that he had left. I was glad that the Holy Spirit had arrested him. I went to the kitchen to take my beans, beans that I had been keeping so that I would eat it before going for fellowship.”
“Bros Ezekiel, what happened to your beans?”
“Brother Fifi, I soaked my garri, went to my room and was about to eat the food with the love of Christ flowing around, but as I took the first spoon of beans, I had to spit it out.”
I was getting impatient.
“Your friend, Tope, had emptied almost half the volume of salt in its container into my pot of beans.”
“When you were praying about casting out evil and all, was your voice loud, did you mention his name?” I asked
“Maybe once or twice but does it matter?” he shook his head in dismay, “The fight I had with him was spiritual, why did he attack me physically, that’s not fair!”
“But he didn’t attack you, he only attacked your beans.”
“Common brother Fifi, that is just wrong. Since I entered this premises, I have been under attack, either through that immoral girl called Kiki or your friends.”
It was time for me to sleep
“Bros, how can I help you?”
“Tell your friend to give his life to Christ and he should look for a bible believing church. A man’s food is an integral part of his well being, if you can attack his food, you can kill.”
“I will tell him that, anything else, bros?”
“Yes, let us pray.”

Kiki moved in about a month after Ezekiel did. I wondered if all her belongings would fit into the apartment. Didn’t she remember that she only paid for a room? She gave the house a new look. Her smell was everywhere. The kitchen now had utensils that beautified it.
I remember when Ezekiel first set his eyes on her. She had moved in on a thursday when Ezekiel usually came home late after attending one of his numerous fellowships. When he entered the apartment he went straight into his room to give thanks to God and all the plenty things he did, then he came out with a bowl of uncooked beans. I was sitting in the parlor when he ran out the kitchen closely followed by Kiki.
"Fifi, we have an intruder in the kitchen"
"Oh, you are Ezekiel, Fifi told me about you, nice to meet you".
He ignored her handshake.
"Why are you dressed like this, sister Kiki?"
Kiki was dressed in a micro-mini skirt and a tank top. I wondered if she shouldnt be free to dress the way she liked in an apartment she paid for.
"Oh, is that why you are not going to shake me?"
"But you are not dressed in a decent way".
I wanted to walk out of their discussion but i was busy studying for GCE.
"Mr Ezekiel, I suggest you get used to it. If you cannot stand my dressing, I suggest you unlook".
"Fifi, we are Christians in this house, you have to do something about this".
"Like what, Ezekiel?"
I wished I could tell him about tolerance. How much I have tolerated his all night prayer battles with his family from the village, the city, overseas and ancestors.
"If she doesn’t dress like a Christian sister and save us from sin, her rent will be refunded to her".
"And you will pay for the room?" I asked.
Kiki started shaking her head incredulously, "Times like this, I wished I had not stopped smoking," she said hissing.
"Ezekiel, we will live peacefully with each other, as long as nobody is encroaching on another person's space".
Kiki hissed again and went back to the kitchen.
“I want to cook beans now I cannot go into the kitchen, Fifi why did you collect this type of tenant. Na our salvation you they play with o”
Kiki came back to the parlour later with two plates of rice and turkey. She gave one to me and took the other to her room. I was very grateful. Ezekiel was muttering some things to himself that I really wanted to hear but couldn’t. His eyes were fixed on the meal.
He stood up abruptly, went to his room and came out with a bible, a new one. He knocked on Kiki’s door.
“Ezekiel, what can I do for you again?”
“Ahn ahn, Sister Kiki. It is not like that. See I brought you a bible”.
“You don’t know how to talk to people”. She said
“Oya no vex. I brought you this Gideon’s bible, it’s a gift from me to you”.
“I thought it’s free. Missionaries share it and it’s even written on it that it is free?”
“You are missing the point, precious one”.
“I am listening”.
“A gift is a gift, either free or not”.
“Ok, thank you dear”.
She collected the bible and wanted to close her door when he stopped her.
“What is it now?”
“Has the rice finished? You see, I have beans but no palm oil”.
“Oh, perhaps you can pray that God should turn water to palm oil?”
“Stop am, hungry dey nack me”.
“Go ahead and take as much as you want, I was just kidding with you dear”.
He didn’t wait for her to finish before dashing into the kitchen.
After about four spoons of rice I told him I didn’t see him pray before he started digging. I was used to him praying fervently whenever beans and garri was the dish.
“Praying is more of spiritual than physical bro. I prayed with my spirit”.
More than once, I had suspected that Ezekiel was a false prophet.

Laolu09:
Hi people. I'm new on Nairaland so pardon me if I make any mistakes. I'm an aspiring writer and I absolutely love to share my stories with the world. Is there any rule against me posting stories here on Nairaland?

looking forward to reading your story. Don't keep us waiting for too long sir.

I wanted to tell her to come back around in the morning. I also wanted to just shut the door on her and go back to sleep but I couldn’t.
“Yes”, I replied.
“Are you the Landlord?” she asked.
“Yes”
“My name is Kiki, can I see the room?”
“Sure”.
She took a tour of the apartment, spending more time in the kitchen and toilet.
“You live alone?”
“Nope, my younger sister stays here. She is with a neighbour now.”
She removed the shades and I saw the most beautiful brown eyes.
“What of your parents?”
“Dead”
“Oh my God”, she dropped her hand bag on the plastic chair that Ezenwa almost destroyed with his big yansh. She embraced me like a lost family member. She smelled great, her hair was inches away from my nostrils...I was in a garden of roses.
“It’s been a while, not a big deal anymore”. I still enjoyed the hug.
“Can I pay now?” she asked.
“You will have to come tomorrow, my friend that serves as my lawyer will have to be around”.
“Oh, you have a lawyer. That’s nice”.
“He is not really a lawyer yet, not even in a university yet”.
We both laughed.
“Sorry for disturbing so late, will come around tomorrow”.
“It’s alright”.
“Please reserve the room for me”.
“For a thousand years”.
“Awww, thats so cute, thanks. What’s your name?”
“Fifi”
“I am Kiki, you are Fifi. We are like twinnies”
I chuckled.
“I might be a bit older, but we would still be twinnies”.
I extended my hand to tell her goodnight. She brushed it off and hugged me instead.
“We would be the best flat mates ever”.

That night as I slept, I would rather have dreamt of Kiki but I dreamt of Ezekiel. In the dream, he was moving into the apartment with about a hundred bibles. I kept throwing them back out, but it was like they were duplicating themselves. When I woke up, it was Sunday and Hanatu was already in the apartment. She was making bread and fried eggs for breakfast.
“Hello mama, how was your night?”
“Fine bro, did you get any tenant?” she asked.
“Yes” I replied.
“Who are they?”
“One is a son of God”
“And the other?”
“Daughter of Eve”.

My lawyer, Tope was in my house with me to choose my new tenants. Two weeks ago, my friends and I had pasted the vacancy at the various notice boards in LASU, Ojo campus.
We had fixed a single day for the various applicants to come and check the ‘hostel’. It was a bright Saturday and by 3pm, Tope and I had started doubting if anyone was going to show up. We had swept and arranged the apartment like we have never done before. I even sprayed some of Hanatu’s perfume on the curtains.
On my hand was a paper containing a list of rules guiding us on the selection of the ideal tenant.
They were;
1. Must be a single tenant, no family.
2. Must be a student of a higher institution.
3. Must be between ages 18 and 30.
4. Last and definitely not least, must recognise Fifi as the landlord and Tope as the lawyer.


Tope was drinking garri and kulikuli when the first applicant breezed into the apartment. He was a chubby guy that called himself Ezenwa.
“How much be the rent?” he asked, sitting down on the plastic chair we had rented from Mama Joshua, I wondered if the chair would survive his weight.
“50k per year, agency 5k, commission 5k, damages 5k”, Tope said.
“Nna meeeeeeen, just for one room?”
“Yes, sir”
“You na go collect 40k, na wetin dey my hand be that”
“We are sorry Sir, but that is not enough,” I said.
After a while of arguing, he left. He must have opened up a flood gate because many more applicants started arriving but they didn’t want to pay the said rent, the others that were ready didn’t pass our criteria.
That was before Ezekiel came in.
He was dressed in a funny looking shirt and trousers. The shirt was quite larger than he was, so also the pant. I wondered if he had money for food, talk less of rent.
Tope didn’t waste time in telling him about the rent and how we were not ready to bulge.
“Are you a Christian?” he asked me
“What does that have to do with the rent?” I asked him.
“Everything, brother Fifi. Are you a Christian, my brother?”
“Yes, sir”, I replied.
“Halleluyah!”
He became ecstatic. The hatred I had for religious bigots made me dislike him. I wondered if I was a muslim, he would have walked out.
“Let us pray brother Fifi and Tope”.
I had heard enough and wanted to walk him out; Tope stopped me with a wink.
He told us to hold hands, I scornfully obeyed.
“Father Lord, you brought all of us here for a reason, please lord, and fulfil your purpose in this assembly. Show me a sign that I should get this room, in Jesus name”.
While we opened our eyes, he still closed his. A frown was spreading across his lips until he broke into laughter.
“Father Lord, I hear you, I hear you clearly”, he screamed.
Tope tried to stop himself from laughing, but he let out spits of giggle.
“Fifi, God has said should get the apartment”, he said looking at me happily.
“God is good”, I replied.
“Do you believe in God , brother Fifi?”
“Yes”.
“That is good. He said I should tell you to just collect 50k and forget about all the other fees”.
Tope laughed so hard, tears were streaming down his eyes.
“Why are you laughing, brother Tope?”
“God works in mysterious ways, sir. While he was telling you to just pay 50k, he was busy telling me to insist that your pay everything with two years rent. God is wonderful Mr Ezekiel”.
Ezekiel frowned at the statement; he turned back his attention to me.
“What do you say, Brother Fifi, listen to God or man?”
“I will listen to my lawyer”, I replied.
He stood up immediately and started singing songs of praise. I was glad he did because of his bad breathe. He stopped after a couple of songs, after which he reached into his withered briefcase, brought out some money and gave it to Tope.
After counting it and confirming that it was 65k, he was giving a roughly drafted agreement form by Tope to fill. I gave him a key to his room and one to the door of the flat.
He promised to relocate into the apartment within the month, we shook hands and he left. We didn’t have much progress with the remaining applicants; it looked like we were going to have to paste more vacancies for the spare room.
I thanked Tope for his assistance; he rejected the 5k I gave him for the agency fee, saying that we were all doing it for Hanatu. After bidding him goodnight, I settled into my bed. Hanatu was with Oge, she was spending more time with her and I had no power to stop her. Since the last incidence with Oge, I had been avoiding her like a plague.
I was listing all my regrets in my head when I heard a knock on the door. I wondered if Tope had forgotten something in the apartment or Hanatu wanted to come home after all. I wondered if she came with Oge, I didn’t mind seeing Oge before I slept, if just for a second before I flee.
Opening the door, I saw someone I had never seen before. She was a girl dressed stylishly like a model. It was dark but she still had dark shades on.
“I am sorry that I am late, traffic issues. Is the room still vacant?”

Oge was killing me.
It took me a while to get used to the idea of Bros Emma straffing her. Now she was carrying his baby and apparently proud of it. Besides money and age, the guy had nothing on me. The remaining conversation I had with Ugo was a blur, I couldn’t remember anything.
From the look on Tope’s face as we strolled home, he had himself a girlfriend. I didn’t know where I had gotten the rotten luck that had been my companion in recent time. I was not a spiritual person but I wondered if God could save me from this quick sand.
“I will make Bose my queen, she told me she had been tripping for me since I came to get agege bred from her shop one year ago”, Tope informed us.
I wondered what must have made her trip, but I as usual, kept quiet. Oge with a protruding stomach, making egusi soup in Bros Emma’s kitchen, while he sat in the living room, reading a newspaper were among the imaginations ruining my world.
“Fifi, which genre of people will you be accommodating in your abode?” Tope asked, immediately changing the way he walked to blend with the inappropriate words he spoke.
“You should avoid family people or those that wouldn’t be able to re-new their rent at the right time”.
‘Like your father’, I thought to myself.
“So which kind of people do you have in mind learned one?” I asked.
“As your Lawyer and an erudite friend, I strongly recommend that you take in only students of a higher institution”.
I didn’t remember ever telling Tope that he was my lawyer, he hadn’t even resumed as a Law student. But once again, I kept it to myself.
“Like someone from LASU?” I asked.
“Too many cultists jor”, Ugo quickly replied.
Tope raised his hand as if to silence us. The raised hand exposed a torn part of the shirt at the armpit region. He took his time before he replied...as an erudite fellow.
“Dear Ugo, both the male and female species constitute students of that great Institution, don’t be hindered by your myopic prejudice against the school”.
“Your mama is myopic”. Ugo replied.
Tope laughed out loud, he was clearly enjoying himself.
Ugo and I saw him off to his flat then went to his. Oge was plaiting Hanatu’s hair when we got in; they were also talking about something that was of great humour to them both.
“Bro, what did you buy for me?” Hana said with a broad smile, “I told Oge about your plan, she said she will get provisions for me when I am about to leave”.
“She wouldn’t need to do that; I will be able to take care of you”, I said curtly.
Hanatu must have noticed the pitch of my voice, for she looked at Oge , trying to decipher if we were fighting.
“Fifi, you have no right to stop me from getting something for Hanatu”.
“Of course I can”.
“You can stop her from being my sister, but you can’t stop her from being my friend”.
“Whatever! Just don’t justify your actions because of your gifts to Hanatu”.
Hanatu wanted to talk but she was motioned to keep quiet by Ugo. Like Hanatu, he was amazed without knowing what Oge and I were really talking about.
“Hanatu, let’s go home”.
“But you told me that I could spend the night here”, she replied.

I walked out of the house but was met by Oge before I got to my flat.
“You don’t have to take on the issues we have on Hanatu, she should be left out of it”.
“Are you really pregnant?” I asked her, I could smell her fragrance, but tonight I was too angry to like it.
“Ugo must have told you, that guy has a big mouth”.
“Oge, you are not even 18 yet”.
“How old was your mum when she gave birth to you?”
“Don’t you ever mention my mother in your life”.
“What will you do if I do?” she said moving closer to me, daring me to do my worst.
“You are just a confused ashewo”.
“Like your mum?”
I threw my fist at her; she ducked as my hand struck the wall behind her. The fear in her eyes was heartbreaking. She didn’t believe I could want to hit her.
“I am sorry,” I said.
She was shielding herself with her arms, like I could try to hit her again.
“I am glad I made the right choice, Emma would never hit me”.
“But I said I am sorry”.
“I am pregnant, and I am keeping the baby. I love him more each day. Just because I gave you head doesn’t mean we are all that”.
“You are hurting me, Oge”
“I wish I could do more!” she said, going back the way she came.
Maybe I should have told her I loved her that night.

I was in a position where i rather not be. In so short a time, Dad had killed himself, Oge had started fvcking someone else and i had failed my WAEC examinations.
The economy was getting shittier; I couldn’t get menial jobs anymore. Ugo and Tope were preparing to go to proceed with their lives, I was at a standstill. I had promised myself that nothing would come between Hana and me, but it was getting bleak. I loved her so much that I didn’t want her to leave my side, but I was being selfish. She needed to be in a private boarding school where her status as an SS patient was known by relevant authorities. Having made up my mind, I walked to her room, defeated.
“Mama, I have something to tell you”, I said lying close to her.
“What is it bro?” she said, holding a novel with weird drawings on its front cover.
“You will have to go to a boarding school where you will be catered for”.
“Are you tired of me already? If there is anything I did, I am very sorry bro”
I assured her that I was doing it for her own good and the school would be close to the Estate.
“Who would take care of you when I am not around?” she asked.
“I am a big boy, I would take care of myself”.
“How would you afford the fees? We are barely breaking even with the school I am in presently. Boarding school is quite expensive.”
I wondered if she was ready for the other news, but I gave her anyways.
“We would be renting out your room and Dads; I will move all your belongings to mine. Don’t worry, I won’t mess with your stuff, most times, I will be in the parlour”
“So, you and I will be like roommates?”
“Yes. Whenever you are on holidays, we would be roommates”
She stood and I was suddenly scared. If she rejected my preposition, I wouldn’t be able to force it on her.
“Bro?”
“Yes?”
“Thanks for the sacrifice; I know you rather have us maintain this arrangement”. She came and gave me a hug.
“Can I sleep with auntie Oge tonight? She told me to ask for your permission.
“Yes, no problem smallie”
I wished it was that easy for me to ‘sleep’ with with Oge too.
Ugo and Tope were waiting for me at the car park. Tope had a girl he wanted to ‘toast’, he wanted us to be close to him when he made the move, though her name was Bose, he called her ‘Cleopatra’, said she was the most beautiful girl in the world. She was that beautiful to me, but we all had to agree that she was Cleopatra.
On sighting me, they both walked to meet me.
“Fifi, tonight is the night, that girl must succumb to my charm. I am her Caeser”
It wouldn’t have been fair to tell him about a certain individual called Mark Anthony, so I accepted he was Caeser.
Ugo was less talkative. He had a lot in his plate. His father might be dismissed from the force and he wasn’t excited about Police college.
As we walked to Bose’s mother’s shop at Zone C, I told them about my decision to rent out the rooms in my apartment, I also told them about sending Hanatu to a Boarding school. They agreed that it was a good arrangement.
Bose was alone in the shop when we got there. She started smiling as we approached her, Tope was giggling too. I wondered why he even had to woo her, she was already crazy over him as he was of her.
Ugo and I took free Gala and Lacasera from her stand and left the two of them.
After walking some few distance away, Ugo turned to me. He was still looking depressed.
“Fifi, Oge has messed up big time, I don’t know what to do”
“How, what happened?”
“She is pregnant for Bros Emma”.
“Are you serious?”
“Yes, and the painful thing is that she is not ashamed about it. She says he has promised to marry her”.
I started suffocating.

Laphtarjay:
Awesome piece bro... Pls keep the flag flying... And don't forget that you can do better!

But I need you help clear something...

"Some of the officers were laughing at
me, each was telling the others why they
thought my colleagues had tied me u and left
me behind. Most agreed it was greed, that i
was probably trying to run away with all they
had stolen from the professors house.
That was when I remembered the artwork in
the parlour. That must have been the
professor and his wife. I realised i had been
used by the girl to rob the house, her gang
member had met up with her and......oh my
God."[s]Awesome piece bro... Pls keep the flag flying... And don't forget that you can do better!

But I need you to help clear something...

"Some of the officers were laughing at
me, each was telling the others why they
thought my colleagues had tied me u and left
me behind. Most agreed it was greed, that i
was probably trying to run away with all they
had stolen from the professors house.
That was when I remembered the artwork in
the parlour. That must have been the
professor and his wife. I realised i had been
used by the girl to rob the house, her gang
member had met up with her and......oh my
God."[/s]Awesome piece bro... Pls keep the flag flying... And don't forget that you can do better!

But here is my observation. I would love it if you help clarify things on this area (it's unclear to me).

"Some of the officers were laughing at
me, each was telling the others why they
thought my colleagues had tied me u and left
me behind. Most agreed it was greed, that i
was probably trying to run away with all they
had stolen from the professors house.
That was when I remembered the artwork in
the parlour. That must have been the
professor and his wife. I realised i had been
used by the girl to rob the house, her gang
member had met up with her and......oh my
God."

Was the guy actually found in the professor's house from which the thieves stole?

If the answer is a yes, how did they manage to enter and sleep there overnight.

I guess I'm not too unclear in the way I've asked.
THANKS.

It was a robbery from the onset, the girl was a thief, must have done her findings, way to get in, residents having travelled and all...Dapo was in the dark.

lumzybo:
Davidflo pllsssssssssssssssss na...

Yes boss, we should continue this week. thanks.

IDFWU:

There is no such thing as "re-read" b4 u pick on people's errors, try working on yours 1st. MISTAKE, that's why we called human. But davidflo no offence man the typos are really much, try 2 review b4 posting.

that's d part I hate d most. next time?

I didn't know who the first person to find me was, but the room was filled with policemen when i regained consciousness. I was still naked with blood on the sheets.

A man with a lot of tribal marks was asking me questions like who i was, where are my other gang members, where did we hide the things we stole from the house. I just kept crying. Some of the officers were laughing at me, each was telling the others why they thought my colleagues had tied me u and left me behind. Most agreed it was greed, that i was probably trying to run away with all they had stolen from the professors house.

That was when I remembered the artwork in the parlour. That must have been the professor and his wife. I realised i had been used by the girl to rob the house, her gang member had met up with her and......oh my God.

I decided to tell the tribal marked guy all that happened. He nodded and kept taking notes, i wondered why he didn't unbound me, but i kept talking.

The he asked me two questions.

"What is her name?"

"I don't know", i replied.

"His name?"

"I don't know"

The other policemen started laughing at me. I wondered if he was going t laugh to but he didn't, until he asked me one last question.

"So him Bleep you for yansh?"

"Yes"

Then they all laughed louder, including my interrogator.

Some minutes later I was handcuffed and taken to their station, where i was locked up without charge or trial for two weeks.


On a sunday afternoon, I was suddenly called from my cell that I had made bail. I got to the counter to see Shade at the other side. She cried as soon as she saw me, I tried to be strong but I cried to.


As she drove me to her house, she told me everybody was looking for me and no one thought about checking the police station until my abandoned car was recovered at Dugbe.

"Dapo, tell me, what happened?"

I kept quiet for a while, then i spoke.

"Its a very short story...but first, please forgive me."









The end.