Liliantalks:
So My mum saw my daily pills and flipped , we started a discussion on why I took them ,, so she was like

Mum: why r you taking them
Me: to regulate my period
Mum : what r u regulating them for
Me : I just want To hv control of myself
Me : and also as a contraceptive against pregnancy
Mum : what!! why will u do that , u be small pickin o , u wan find pickin? (angry face)
Me : just wanna be safe ,, it’s better than those other harsh contraceptives
Mum : those things r for prostitutes
Me : its not true
Mum : so why r u preventing pregnancy
Me: maybe the guy I am with is still coming up in life n we r not ready for a baby
Mum : very furious) if u are dating a man and u r scared of getting pregnant for him ,, leave him !!
Don’t ever date an unstable Man U are bigger than that rubbish ,, abi u no get sense? Don’t ever bring that kind of man to my house!! I prefer u Wait n stay old b4 getting married than getting married to an unstable man with no money .
Me : that’s why I want my own money .
Mum: you r really a fool ,, so u want ur own money so u would be using ur money on urself while dating a riffraff? U don’t even know ur value as a woman !! Don’t even try to bring that kind of man to my house , cause if hungry do you, don’t call me o ,, if Wahala enter the marriage , don’t call me o !! A word is enough for the wise
Me: slient
Mum : hisssss

bad foundation,bad product

Are you 35----50 of age? Are you decent and can communicate with good sense of humor? Do you just need someone to have some fun with ? Pm me let keep the ball rolling. I want to be in the arm of a beautiful woman and I bring loyalty to the table.

NockMedia:

You've got to learn to take the good with the bad, bro.
Nobody is perfect but talk calmly and persuasively to her...to walk on her attitude and character.

. Done that for a year,still no changes.

XhosaNostra:



I'm not. We're definitely not each other's type.

. If I. Were in your shoes,I give a try. Friendship isn't a bad start

AfroKnight:
Marry the stubborn one so you can spend the rest of your life arguing.

wise saying

XhosaNostra:



Well, you don't sound like MY kind of guy so I'll pass. You see how easy that was? That's the knowledge I was telling you about earlier on.

. Don't judge the book at a face picture. I just have this soft spot for Southy girls. BTW you may not even be beautiful though

XhosaNostra:



You just said you have two girlfriends. That's not something I find attractive.

. Girl friend not married. I like a wilding. I don't if you are beautiful but I know you have what I need in a woman.

XhosaNostra:



You & who?

I am dead serious. We can chat privately if you agree.

XhosaNostra:



If I find a good one, maybe

. Should we relocate to Europe? I like your kind of person.

XhosaNostra:


Beauty fades lol. Sounds like you have a clue what's best for you. Choose wisely.

You frequent Nigeria social media, hope you marry one of my brother

XhosaNostra:



You have to compromise on the least important things. An ideal person doesn't exist.

I do know I will have regrets in future if I end up with the first girl. She is beautiful though

XhosaNostra:



Where're the insults? What else am I supposed to call someone that can't make up his mind on the very basic outline of things?

Forget her stubbornness and argument,the first girl is a babe but I don't think I can build a family with her. BTW I always dream of marrying a tall lady

XhosaNostra:
Foolish post. How old are you? You must have low IQ/ very immature if you still don't know the qualities you value the most or are looking for in a mate. Forget looks, what personality traits are most important to you? Because "shape" & all that other boyish cravings will change over time, so rather you delve much deeper than the surface, when choosing a life partner. That's if you want a lasting relationship that isn't based on lust but compatibility.

. Your advice is spot on but with your insult,I personally slap you

McBrooklyn:


My advice; don't take woman matter so serious.. Hell you might later end up with neither sef

Thanks brother

NockMedia:

Choose the one you can't live without. Don't choose the one you can live with.

the one I can't live without in terms of beauty is arrogant and stubborn,but very beautiful.

McBrooklyn:
Settle down with the 3rd girl you forgot to include in the whole story...

. I play some side game but it can't be serious

Samakus:
If I were you, I will go with a woman that will give me peace of mind.

I don't believe that my prosperity as a man is tied to me having one particular girl. That's superstition!!

What will be, will be as long as I work hard smart and pray


See ya

. Thanks. The first girl fight with me Everytime even when I threaten her that I quit if she doesn't change. I am always comfortable with the second girl.

NockMedia:

Don't be silly. How do you expect us to decide for you, huh?
Attention seeker

. I am confused brother,that why.

There is this girl anytime she is around,I get things done easily,I mean she come with special Grace I mean if I am dead broke, the moment she come around I just have one silly favor,she has a nice shape and very tall,average IQ, but very stubborn not willing to learn or adapt, argue on everything,can cook very well and her bedroom skills is above average.She wants a future with me

I recently met a girl so homely, have future prospect, well read,very respectful, Very high IQ, excellent in bed, but not so beautiful. Agreed both are good for marriage and they love me.I am so confused,I don't who to settle with. Help a brother.

Dyonne:


OP, I thought you said decent woman?

decent fun seeker

Harlequeen:
Hello everyone,I'm the girl op is talking about.

This is another long epistle

A few months ago I created a thread stating my difficulties finding men and a lot of you had wonderful advice to give To get more background on the matter, you could peep at the thread.

After that thread, I decided to be open minded, and a few weeks later, I met op. We have hit it off, and things happened, and are still happening fast. Also, I am 25 not 30, that must have been a mistake on his part....no biggie

Now on to the matter. I never really expected to meet op. He is a wonderful person. We love each other no doubt. Now the issue is so complex, To be honest, I don't even know what's wrong with me for distancing him like that. This emotional thing is a real hassle

Our relationship is long distance. Op has had experience with something similar, I haven't, and let me tell you. It is hard, very hard.

Also, I think it may have to do with my personality. I can be reserved at times and quite the loner. Also, emotions are not something I am used to. But I do know this. Op is someone who has a similar vision to mine. I just wasn't expecting fate to deal me the card that it did.

Although factormatt6 is determined, he's just starting afresh. One of the fears I have, is building with a man and making sacrifices for a man, and can you blame me? I see a lot of women get burned for trying that and getting discarded. I grew up in a home where I witnessed my parents fall out of love because one sacrificed her dreams to stay at home, get a small job and look after kids. She was so focused on making sure she trained us well, that she was a mother first,while he advanced in his career to put food on the table. Once he started making it. He started seeing his wife as too behind, too fat, too unsophisticated,too histronic for him or to be seen with his stingy ass. I don't hate my dad, but I will call a spade a spade, I also have a cordial relationship with both parents and tired of being a mediator so I left them to fate. They seem happy with their arrangement. Now we are grown up, and she's almost finished with school but she's also getting older. They still stay married because they are used to each other, besides I don't think there's any other woman who would let my dad get away with the BS my dad does like my thick skinned mom. A loveless relationship where they are just flatmates and happy with themselves. Growing up like this has shaped my personality. I told myself that I will not make the same mistake of putting myself on hold for a man, or his children. That's why I'm career oriented. What if something similar happens to me in future. He loves me now, but people always change. What will the future bring?


When I met factormatt6, What shocked me was the fact that he's starting school again, but that will take some years to finish, then he also had to go for his master's and PhD, what if things don't work out as planned, does that mean I'll be feeding a man and being the breadwinner? That's emotionally exhausting. What if I end up being a surrogate mother to a grown ass man? I cannot wish that situation on my enemy. That's why I act cold to him. Op has a mommy complex and I told him to deal with it. He then asked if I could be like a big sister, that sent alarm bells to my head, and we argued about it

So I find myself fighting between my common sense and my heart. I am struggling to convince myself that I am making the right choice. This is in no way his fault.He seems to know this too. It makes me act in ways that makes him feel like I don't trust him. My cold, blunt, introverted and loner nature isn't helping either.

About the matter of an ultimatum, it wasn't really an ultimatum per se. I don't know. One of the first things, I told him was that I only deal with results. So, he needs to put his life in order. I was I won't mind waiting for him for only two years for him to structure his life so that we can both go to my parents and I will not be embarrassed to present him to them. We could then focus on our career and start childbearing when we are more stable. I know he wants to marry me, but I tell him we aren't ready yet. This causes me to put a lot of pressure on him.


I know he's trying and giving it his all, but it seems like I am fighting myself. The battle to not see other people, and keep my options open, he calls me constantly, and I call him at times too, but we can spend 2-3hrs on the phone, and it doesn't help that factormatt6 is a great conversationalist. At times, I just feel like I am not in the mood for conversation but don't want to put it across to him, so as not to hurt his feelings.

Also, Op can be very insecure, It was one of the things I have noticed about him so he can take somethings I say or do personally , he then starts to sulk, so I find myself watching myself so that I don't hurt his feelings . But I also feel like I am in a landmine with him sometimes. He's also an intense person and that scares me, I am more laid back. He can also be a monitoring spirit at times but it's cool.


Then to top it all off, is this terrible lockdown, we try to keep things afloat by chatting a lot. But I find myself feeling drained. I started the lockdown earlier than everyone else and staying at home,leaves me drained. I feel like I don't have the energy anymore to read, chat with him, or even go outside. I find myself feeling heavy. All efforts made by my sisters to make me leave the compound prove abortive. Here I am, unemployed when I am supposed to the working and gathering finances for our visions and I am stuck at home. I am even resenting my family members for taking it so well. My parents still go to work because they are in essential services but I feel useless and just want to be left to myself. I feel like a failure. I'm scared of failing. I'm scared of being poor, and I'm poor right now.

factormatt6 I'm sorry if I made you feel bad for asking for space. I love you. It's not your fault. I'll come round soon. I know the lockdown is affecting him too. I keep arguing with him to make new friends or talk to more people online. But it's hard to do so this lockdown. Guess I am being my paranoid, afraid and unreasonable self as usual. It's not your fault dear. I love you.

. The odd is against you or I say 50 50. If you wait for him, he build up and dump you but from his write up, I think op is a badass who has seen life. Guys like that, nothing move them. So I advised if you want to tag along, do it with all your heart,put in your very best. Love and respect him, whose knows you may smile at the end. I hope he doesn't sweet talk you into staying with him. If you love him sincerely take a chance, I wish you the best.

Harlequeen:
Hello everyone,I'm the girl op is talking about.

This is another long epistle

A few months ago I created a thread stating my difficulties finding men and a lot of you had wonderful advice to give To get more background on the matter, you could peep at the thread.

After that thread, I decided to be open minded, and a few weeks later, I met op. We have hit it off, and things happened, and are still happening fast. Also, I am 25 not 30, that must have been a mistake on his part....no biggie

Now on to the matter. I never really expected to meet op. He is a wonderful person. We love each other no doubt. Now the issue is so complex, To be honest, I don't even know what's wrong with me for distancing him like that. This emotional thing is a real hassle

Our relationship is long distance. Op has had experience with something similar, I haven't, and let me tell you. It is hard, very hard.

Also, I think it may have to do with my personality. I can be reserved at times and quite the loner. Also, emotions are not something I am used to. But I do know this. Op is someone who has a similar vision to mine. I just wasn't expecting fate to deal me the card that it did.

Although factormatt6 is determined, he's just starting afresh. One of the fears I have, is building with a man and making sacrifices for a man, and can you blame me? I see a lot of women get burned for trying that and getting discarded. I grew up in a home where I witnessed my parents fall out of love because one sacrificed her dreams to stay at home, get a small job and look after kids. She was so focused on making sure she trained us well, that she was a mother first,while he advanced in his career to put food on the table. Once he started making it. He started seeing his wife as too behind, too fat, too unsophisticated,too histronic for him or to be seen with his stingy ass. I don't hate my dad, but I will call a spade a spade, I also have a cordial relationship with both parents and tired of being a mediator so I left them to fate. They seem happy with their arrangement. Now we are grown up, and she's almost finished with school but she's also getting older. They still stay married because they are used to each other, besides I don't think there's any other woman who would let my dad get away with the BS my dad does like my thick skinned mom. A loveless relationship where they are just flatmates and happy with themselves. Growing up like this has shaped my personality. I told myself that I will not make the same mistake of putting myself on hold for a man, or his children. That's why I'm career oriented. What if something similar happens to me in future. He loves me now, but people always change. What will the future bring?


When I met factormatt6, What shocked me was the fact that he's starting school again, but that will take some years to finish, then he also had to go for his master's and PhD, what if things don't work out as planned, does that mean I'll be feeding a man and being the breadwinner? That's emotionally exhausting. What if I end up being a surrogate mother to a grown ass man? I cannot wish that situation on my enemy. That's why I act cold to him. Op has a mommy complex and I told him to deal with it. He then asked if I could be like a big sister, that sent alarm bells to my head, and we argued about it

So I find myself fighting between my common sense and my heart. I am struggling to convince myself that I am making the right choice. This is in no way his fault.He seems to know this too. It makes me act in ways that makes him feel like I don't trust him. My cold, blunt, introverted and loner nature isn't helping either.

About the matter of an ultimatum, it wasn't really an ultimatum per se. I don't know. One of the first things, I told him was that I only deal with results. So, he needs to put his life in order. I was I won't mind waiting for him for only two years for him to structure his life so that we can both go to my parents and I will not be embarrassed to present him to them. We could then focus on our career and start childbearing when we are more stable. I know he wants to marry me, but I tell him we aren't ready yet. This causes me to put a lot of pressure on him.


I know he's trying and giving it his all, but it seems like I am fighting myself. The battle to not see other people, and keep my options open, he calls me constantly, and I call him at times too, but we can spend 2-3hrs on the phone, and it doesn't help that factormatt6 is a great conversationalist. At times, I just feel like I am not in the mood for conversation but don't want to put it across to him, so as not to hurt his feelings.

Also, Op can be very insecure, It was one of the things I have noticed about him so he can take somethings I say or do personally , he then starts to sulk, so I find myself watching myself so that I don't hurt his feelings . But I also feel like I am in a landmine with him sometimes. He's also an intense person and that scares me, I am more laid back. He can also be a monitoring spirit at times but it's cool.


Then to top it all off, is this terrible lockdown, we try to keep things afloat by chatting a lot. But I find myself feeling drained. I started the lockdown earlier than everyone else and staying at home,leaves me drained. I feel like I don't have the energy anymore to read, chat with him, or even go outside. I find myself feeling heavy. All efforts made by my sisters to make me leave the compound prove abortive. Here I am, unemployed when I am supposed to the working and gathering finances for our visions and I am stuck at home. I am even resenting my family members for taking it so well. My parents still go to work because they are in essential services but I feel useless and just want to be left to myself. I feel like a failure. I'm scared of failing. I'm scared of being poor, and I'm poor right now.

factormatt6 I'm sorry if I made you feel bad for asking for space. I love you. It's not your fault. I'll come round soon. I know the lockdown is affecting him too. I keep arguing with him to make new friends or talk to more people online. But it's hard to do so this lockdown. Guess I am being my paranoid, afraid and unreasonable self as usual. It's not your fault dear. I love you.

. The odd is against you or I say 50 50.

jawalis:
This is not funny. Are there no more women in your district/street or city? Get yourself together and fix things
Sweetcunt97 your attention is needed. Funmisticqueen2 this May be a perfect offer if you ask me. What do you think MZrapper.

. No woman below 30 please. I need an adventure so having a distance lady is a plus

donuchris007:
. I tell you a bitter true. She is afraid of tomorrow because investing her time and maybe finance may not yield good result. You can let her go and build your life because I figured you are a determined person. Much better ladies await you. If you must be with her, don't let her drive the relationship take charge as a man.

. Love in Nigeria is a scam. So far you don't have financial strength to marry her now, expect her to misbehave. It doesn't cost much for her to build with you a home she will be proud of but she wouldn't. When you finally make it on your own, watch how she regret everything. Them full Winner. Focus on your life, when you arrive they all now at your feet.

factormatt6:
My story is going to be lengthy, because I need you to understand my situation and offer useful advise. Please pardon any Grammatical error. Help me with advice.
I lost my dad when I was 11, mum take care of me and my education in all possible ways. She die immediately I finished my waec. I have grown up sisters and brothers.
I am from a humble Christian background. My dad denounced an idols practices and even make effort for church to be planted in my village.So basically, I never lack love.After my mum's death, everyone chart his or her part in life. I went with my uncle, struggling to gain admission but was fruitless.
I started hustling by myself and by 23 I had my first car, get a plot of land and start building. I lived in one of the Nigeria oil city so girls wasn't a big deal.
One of my mentor advice me against falling in love. I live with this principle, one girl for one day. No matter how beautiful you are, the moment we have sex, I will lose interest.
Been from a royal root, I strongly believe that a prince should not sleep alone at night, so I always have girls around me but never get to love them, we have fun and it ends there.my Anty taught me how to use a condom (she is a nurse) so I never for once sleep with a girl without condom because I don't want a commoner to exchange blood with me unless I am to marry her.
I always wanted the best for myself. After seeking admission for quite a while, a friend introduce me to a consultation who gave me admission in one of the West African university. Something happened and I had to go to my embassy which I was strongly advise to visit Nigeria. I did, only to be told by ministry of education that NUC doesn't recognize my school and the course I am into. So I lost all, become depressed. Start drinking, traveling to places, have a lot of fun, I just wanted to end it all.My late mum talk to me in a dream and from that day I stop everything fun, I start dreaming again.
After some year I make up my mind to start afresh. I wrote waec, used my ND gain admission this year. I have a dream to go into space science or oil exploration. So basically I'm am living my dream. I make up my mind that no girl will be in the picture, having traveling to five countries in Africa, I don't want to live in Nigeria, Can't raise my kids here, it a very toxic place.
I got engaged in a business, I make some good money. My family member requested for an help in her building project. I discarded her plan, instruct the building planner to draw another plan. I start the project for her, money got finished, she ask for my help. I told her,I can only help her with my capital, she beg and I release 400k to her. After paying for my admission process, school fee and my feeding, I had little left. I left the building at roofing level. My Anty didn't refund my money, I plead, make trouble, involved police,she refused to give me back my money. This is the third time my family has dealt with me financially. I make up my mind not to have anything to do with my family members.
Now here is the real story.
In one of my business deal, I met a girl. Natural skin, flesh in right places, very smart and intelligent. The more I get to know her the more I desire her then for the first time in my 30 years,I fall in love. We both want the same thing, we have the same dream. She visit me in a neutral place, I emptied my account to part pay for the place we will be staying, I even help her to acquire one of her document.
We instantly connect.I make love to her skin to skin ( my very time of doing that),did other things I won't dare with any girl. She is so real and sincere,she is truly amazing and an angel. For three days we stayed together we never had a dull moment. I saw in her a future,to a point that I call her my mum name. I told her everything about me.we make a lot of financial plan because she give me two years to get married to her or she walk.
She is already a graduate but she accepted to marry me while I complete my studies then we move to Europe,or Australia.
She make some sacrifice, give me some fund to add and start a business,but the lock down affect our plans.
Here is the problem
She has started acting up. We video chat for hours every day but since two days ago she wants her space.
Now I need advice: 1: Can I stay with her and we continue planning our life together or I should let her go and concentrate with my studies? Note she doesn't affect my ability to study negatively.
The most important question now
2:If I should allow her to wait for me,how is it possible that I will achieve my dream and make a family with her? I don't want to frustrate her, I care about her to a point I can let her go and hurt my self.
Please anyone who has gone through this before can share his or her story. I will share it with her freely and we take a decision. Also anyone with useful advise PL drop.
Please note, I am not obsess with her. I am truly in love with her.

. I tell you a bitter true. She is afraid of tomorrow because investing her time and maybe finance may not yield good result. You can let her go and build your life because I figured you are a determined person. Much better ladies await you. If you must be with her, don't let her drive the relationship take charge as a man.

Richy4:
You can solve the puzzle if you can identify the reason(s) why she wanted her space. From there every thing will be clear to u like 7UP.

You can even figure out if she can wait for u or not...

. Allow her to make her decision

Are you 35_50? You don't want to marry but need a man for fun, adventure and companion.Email me let get to know each other.
I am 30, 6 feet tall. Self dependent. Mature, responsible and good looking.
I don't want commitment (marriage for now) so no marriage on the table. I can hold my end so I won't be depending on you.

donuchris007:
Are you a mature easy going lady.love fun and adventure? You have a wonderful life and you are looking for someone to share your your moment with? Are you looking for someone to talk to and have great fun? Sent me a message through my email let get to talk. Please age bracket is between 30-60. Clean and decent. PL note Marriage is not in the equation
I am 30, 6 feet tall, chocolate. Brown eyes. Can drive, cook and very energetic. I know how to treat a lady.
donuchris007@gmail.com. please only serious minded person should contact me.

. Are you lonely like me? Do you like an adventure with someone you are a bit older than? Email me let hit it on.

sisisioge:
Haba, you didn't mention being rich or having enough to treat the cool madam

. I can pay my bill I that what you want me to say

missimelda01:
Just say it 'I want a sugar mummy'

Nobody will kee you.

. Nope I don't need someone to support me. A friend we can have great fun, adventure and ideals. Not ready for marriage yet.

Are you a mature easy going lady.love fun and adventure? You have a wonderful life and you are looking for someone to share your your moment with? Are you looking for someone to talk to and have great fun? Sent me a message through my email let get to talk. Please age bracket is between 30-60. Clean and decent. PL note Marriage is not in the equation
I am 30, 6 feet tall, chocolate. Brown eyes. Can drive, cook and very energetic. I know how to treat a lady.
donuchris007@gmail.com. please only serious minded person should contact me.

Are you a mature easy going lady.love fun and adventure? You have a wonderful life and you are looking for someone to share your your moment with? Are you looking for someone to talk to and have great fun? Sent me a message through my email let get to talk. Please age bracket is between 30-60. Clean and decent. PL note Marriage is not in the equation
I am 30, 6 feet tall, chocolate. Brown eyes. Can drive, cook and very energetic. I know how to treat a lady.
donuchris007@gmail.com. please only serious minded person should contact me.