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 Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 4:22pm On Aug 21, 2015 |
Lycantant:You're not the only one dear, the remaining of your colleagues are having session with a therapist, book your space quickly. 2 Likes |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 4:20pm On Aug 21, 2015 |
DICKtator: |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 4:06pm On Aug 21, 2015 |
orlahtohbadt:Thanks bro!  |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 3:19pm On Aug 21, 2015 |
Akoja360:Thanks bro! 1 Like |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 3:14pm On Aug 21, 2015 |
Jollyjoy:It's not for you dear! Those that it's for already find it revelant, so just do me a favour pls ...gerrrrraaaaaaout of hia! in french se ba po |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 3:14pm On Aug 21, 2015 |
Jollyjoy:It's not for you dear! Those that it's for already find it revelant, so just do me a favour and gerrrrraaaaaaout of hia! in french se ba po |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 3:06pm On Aug 21, 2015 |
pragmatistm: |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 3:01pm On Aug 21, 2015 |
Pdizzle:Yeah sure bro! you can check for others here this is just a tip of the iceberg. Couldn't post all here. Check here more heroes are added http://www.tlkdrum.com/if-nigerias-past-heroes-were-on-instagram/ 1 Like |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 2:59pm On Aug 21, 2015 |
EmagNig:this is just a tip of the iceberg. Couldn't post all here. Check here more heroes are added http://www.tlkdrum.com/if-nigerias-past-heroes-were-on-instagram/ |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 1:41pm On Aug 21, 2015 |
Pdizzle:Yeah sure you can bro! |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 5:53am On Aug 21, 2015 |
southernbelle:Thanks for the warm compliment I did creat them 4 Likes |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 3:27am On Aug 21, 2015 |
eddyline:abacha na heroe to some people o not me though just added it for the fun 1 Like |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 2:29am On Aug 21, 2015 |
Oshe! hooged: 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Politics › Re: Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 2:28am On Aug 21, 2015 |
mumumugu:Ya problem is bigger than the joke...go see a therapist cos you're depressed 232 Likes 9 Shares |
| Politics › Imagine If Nigeria's Past Heroes Were Instagram Users... Lmao See For Yaself by ebbymayox(op): 12:54am On Aug 21, 2015 |
Imagine Nigeria's Past Heroes were Instagram users created by Mayo bayo Source http://www.tlkdrum.com/if-nigerias-past-heroes-were-on-instagram/ https://www.tlkdrum.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/achebe.jpg 31 Likes 9 Shares
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| Literature › Your Doctor Might Be Sad by ebbymayox(op): 8:15pm On Aug 18, 2015 |
I so much love Nollywood movies about the Nigerian campus life, I sometimes wonder why? Maybe it's because it's something I can easily relate with. But come to think of it, my love for campus life movies started right back from secondary school, the movies created my imagination of the campus life my uncle told us about. My Uncle Tunji is such a good story-teller, he could describe hell to you and just as he narrates you could feel the heat. He often told me about his life as an undergraduate, he studied sociology at OAU Ife, and was popularly called Comrado Tsunami back then. "Those days of Aluta were wonderful", he smiled saying as we sat together in a local buka eating Amala. "Ever conscious Ife!! Greatest gbagba!! Greatest gbogbo!! Solidarity forever, Solidarity forever," we sang and chanted as we marched from Awo Hall to the vice-chancellor’s office. "On our way to his office, the stupid man had the guts to come out of his office to address us, the old man said he wanted to keep us calm. "Keep Aro boys calm hahaha," he laughed out loudly. “We ended up keeping his butts calm in one of the hostel's toilet, the oniranu couldn’t bear the smell as he begged on his knees, Kunle you need to see his face," he laughed heartily as he continued narrating. "Oga o that was kind of cruel o bros," I interrupted. "Kunle, Five months of irregular power supply and they still had the audacity to increase the tuition fee, imagine that!" "Awon olosi jatijati, corrupt old fools!," he cursed out loudly I was still in JSS 3 but was already thinking of writing JAMB, I wanted to get into the university as fast as possible. I imagined my life as a student, living in the school dormitory in a room of six , attending night parties and social events every weekend like Uncle Tunji did, going to school’s theatre to watch live dramas, the debates in common room, the arguments in hostels. All these stories Uncle Tunji told me were all in my imaginations. It’s a night before my graduation, here I was sitting in Awo hall. Seven years in this ogba as we fondly called our campus. Those seven years went so fast ...phew… phew like the wind. It’s gone!. So where is the fun? “Don’t let the university pass through you, you have to pass through the university”, my uncle always said, but obviously the university passed through me and not otherwise... I never had time to socialize, the urge to get good grades made me an introvert. Did I get the grades? Yes I did ... tomorrow I will be graduating, and will be awarded the best graduating student in my Faculty, but the satisfaction wasn’t there. You might wonder "why is he just realizing this after seven years?", my circle of friends were just like me; we were book worms that not necessarily enjoyed reading but love getting good grades. Our lives were around four places-Classes -Library -Clinic- Church(and that’s when exams are around the corner and we need his mercies) then back to Classes again. May be we all can’t live the story we love, maybe that's why some of us are being told the story...right? Well you can now call me Doctor Kunle but I still go green with envy each time I see Tokunbo a.k.a Blings Baba, the guy every campus girl wants to date, even just for a day. ***The End Author-Mayo Bayo In case of accidental overdose, tell a friend to visit this blog http://www.tlkdrum.com/your-doctor-might-be-sad/. Read our top 5 posts in the story category below: 1.Yawa don gas 2.Bros Shina 3.Love in a Danfo 4. Amala Saga 5. A touching story © Talking Drum 2015. All Rights Reserved. Please use sharing tools only. |
| Culture › Re: Growing Up In A Nigerian Home-The 12 Common Stories by ebbymayox(op): 1:47pm On Jul 22, 2015 |
This post was originally posted at www.tlkdrum.com Number 1 home of Nigerian and African lifestle stories. If you don't laugh you will think. Visit www.tlkdrum.com and start your day with a goodread. we don't post gossip, celebrity gist, politics etc , we are original and we always keep that in mind. Our articles are short, interesting and free to read. We run no ad on our website. Talking Drum, beating the Nigerian lifestyle into story. other interesting stories we have: 15 signs you're a typical Nigerian http://www.tlkdrum.com/15-signs-youre-a-typical-nigerian/ Nigerians you find in a cinema-http://www.tlkdrum.com/annoying-kind-of-nigerians-i-met-at-the-cinema/ Dating a Nigerian man;What you should know http://www.tlkdrum.com/the-manual-to-dating-a-nigerian-man/ Funny Nigerian proverbs and their loose translation http://www.tlkdrum.com/18-nigerian-pidgin-proverbs-that-will-surely-make-you-laugh/ |
| Culture › Growing Up In A Nigerian Home-The 12 Common Stories by ebbymayox(op): 6:59am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Written by Mayo Bayo. Source:http://www.tlkdrum.com/growing-up-in-a-nigerian-homethe-common-story/ “You spare the rod, you spoil the child” Growing up under the tutelage of my strict Nigerian parent was the best gift I ever had from them. I am forever grateful to my mum and dad, they moulded me into the piece of art I am today. Nigerians and other Africans, mostly have this in common, our parents don’t spare the rod. I look back at my childhood and I still find some moments or things quite interesting- 168 Likes 22 Shares |
| Literature › Lorry, Art And Fear by ebbymayox(op): 12:01am On Jul 13, 2015 |
As a kid, my journeys were stories; the optical illusion of trees moving opposite direction pass our bus; cars and buses stopping over at road blocks for police security checks; the herbal medicine seller that barges into the bus to sell his “all-in-one” tablets, a drug that he says cures “all form” of illness; the preacher man with a long moment of prayer, covering every part of the bus with the precious blood, the spare tyres were not left out; the passengers reciting — Amen as he casts and binds every spirit of the road, he said they are constantly hungry for blood; the bread hawker shouting - “Mummy buy bread,” a common souvenir known to we Nigerians; then the snoring passenger snuggling over the seat; and the always vigilant passenger checking to see their luggage at each stop, this often is my mum. Travelling by road was indeed something I loved. It was my hobby, each city I had visited had a unique story. I met new environment, the smell of new places; in the Northern part of Nigeria where the sun is always shining, one can actually smell the heat or perhaps it had no distinct odou, and the South with its “green” scent smells like a freshly mowed lawn. I wasn’t just excited about the place I was going, the discoveries I made in the journey were the most fascinating. I heard of stories, stories of passengers’ luggage being stolen. The luggage goes missing just immediately after a fellow passenger alight before the last stop. This was mid-December, Nigerians who lived in the city were travelling to their home town. I was travelling with my mum to go see my grand mum. I sat by the window staring at monkeys jumping on the mountain far across the road as the driver dexterously dodges the potholes. A big lorry, what we call sometimes call "mammy wagon" in Nigeria, carrying herd of cattle from the north heading towards the south recklessly overtook our bus. “I no blame you, man wey carry nama go think like nama,” our driver cursed out angrily the lorry driver. The lorry driver pointed his five fingers at our driver's directions, giving the waka gesture as he sped away. On the back of the lorry was beautifully painted - “No Padi 4 Jungle!” I admire lorry drivers, they are like tiny Dany riding on her dragon. And can anyone ride a dragon? No, not at all! The big lorries in Nigeria are not just a form of transport, they are havens of beautiful art, giving other watchful road-user a sight of ingeniously decorated art with inscription of famous lines, rich proverbs mostly from secular songs, holy books and maybe movies; the words are sometimes spelt incorrectly, but the meanings are beautiful. Each driver brings to the road his own philosophy of life in brightly-painted capitals, mostly in English, Hausa, Yoruba, Ibo or in any other of Nigerian language. Suddenly we all jerked forward screaming Jesus as the driver lost control of the bus. He manages to sway the bus into the bush nearby. Everyone now horrified, the passengers sleeping were all called awake by the sudden inertia. Our bus managed to come to a halt with no scratch. “Oh my sister prayer is good o!” the snoring woman said as we all came out of the bus unhurt. Everyone kept reminding themselves of the bus preacher's prayer. From afar, I could see a bus sandwiched between a lorry. It was the lorry that sped past our bus, most of the cows were now lifeless in a pool of blood on the hot bitumen-tarred road; one could mistake it for a voodoo scene. I saw a baby across the bush, it was the first time I saw a dead body. My mum tried to cover my face as she took me back to the bus from seeing what I already saw, I could recognize the lorry driver by his shirt, he was lying motionless in his own blood. After this incident, travelling by road became something I detested, big lorry became my phobia! But a kid has very little option to choose from, especially in an African home, I still had to travel with my mum to the village annually, my heart skipped each time a lorry came nearby, I still see the pool of blood in every art painting on a lorry. My heart would pound and I would start to sweat. The phobia took away my hobby. © Talking Drum 2015. All Rights Reserved. Read Here http:///XvJF09 Please use sharing tools only. Do not cut, copy or lift any content from this website without our consent. Follow us:@TalkingDrumm on Twitter | Talking Drum on Facebook
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| Literature › Re: Bros Shina (short Story)-weekend Special by ebbymayox(op): 12:38pm On Jun 14, 2015 |
CC:Lalasticlala |
| Romance › Re: 5 Kinds Of Male Friends Every Nigerian Girl Has by ebbymayox(op): 12:38pm On Jun 14, 2015 |
CC:Lalasticlala |
| Literature › Re: Bros Shina (short Story)-weekend Special by ebbymayox(op): 2:20am On Jun 06, 2015 |
I am glad you enjoyed it, and thanks for your warm compliment, I hold it dearly waxyung: |
| Literature › Re: Bros Shina (short Story)-weekend Special by ebbymayox(op): 2:19am On Jun 06, 2015 |
Thanks for your feedback, it means a lot to me! Ikonz: |
| Literature › Bros Shina (short Story)-weekend Special by ebbymayox(op): 3:05pm On Jun 05, 2015*. Modified: 12:42pm On Jun 14, 2015 |
Come and see the light, the light of God, come see the light o, Amen Amen. – Bros Shina sang as he walked into my mum’s shop. “Mayo Mayo! Mayo mutumina!” How are you doing today? I can see you’re reading”. Yes Bros, the book you recommended the last time, I replied as I brought the wooden bench out for us to sit. “Smart boy, so what have you learned so far?” he said. Bros Shina was a person of intellectual and erudite taste, a young engineering graduate in his mid-twenties who just got a job in the northern part of Nigeria, Kaduna where I lived with my parent, he was from Lagos, born and bred in Lagos. Bros as I fondly called him, graduated with first class from one of the reputable universities in the western part of Nigeria. He had that energy, the liveliness people who live in Lagos wear with pride. He spoke eloquently and always ladened his words with wisdom. -After school, I help my mum in her petty provision store, I and Brother Shina sat on the bench every evening discussing about Lagos and the World in general. I love Lagos stories, from stories about the dangers and discomfort of the molue buses which he said were always entertaining, to the story of his university days, then to the stories about great world empires, the Greek Empire, the Roman Empire, the Greek mythology and then back to Science. Listening to him carefully and asking questions in between, I knew every popular place and streets in Lagos. His narratives were beyond words and he soon became my mentor. “So what do you think made the Germans lose the World War 2?” he asked. “Because the Allies – Britain, France, the U.S, the Soviet Union were more powerful”, I replied. “You’re very close, but not really the main reason, did you know that Hitler was Austrian born?” he interrupted. -I adored Bros Shina and wanted to be like him. He was also religious, but carried science and history religiously. He said science and religion are like Sudoku, “Mayo science is just Sudoku with empty spaces, Sudoku leaves spaces out if they don’t know it while Religion fills every spaces, you know why?” Because God works in mysterious ways”, he said with a smile. He had this warm sense of humour I find quite witty. “Why do you want to study medicine? You’re very sharp and good with calculations, you should study to become an engineer”, he said one day as I closed the shop for the evening. -On a hot afternoon, Bros Shina had just returned from work. He waved at me from afar as he opened the gate to his flat. Suddenly, I heard a voice shouting bura na bura na, an sace mun bura na. I quickly came out from the shop to see what was going on. Passers-by gathered around him trying to find out what had happened. He ran towards our street and kept shouting in Hausa – an sace mun abuna, an sace abuna na! -This was a time when stories about men’s joysticks being stolen were quite common in Nigeria, but it was majorly in big crowded cities like Lagos and such were still quite new in Kaduna. From stories Bros Shina told me, men whose joysticks were stolen, first had an odd encounter when a passer- by touches them and then a sensation of chill travelling to their genitals, and finally the person become convinced that his genitals were gone, and not gone as in totally disappeared but shrunk to a size smaller than that of a day old baby. These he said were later used for money rituals. After a harsh interrogation, Passerby soon gets to find out that it was Mallam Isa -the tea seller across the road, he said a stranger had stopped to purchase a cup of tea at his shop. After handing over his money, he clasped his hand he immediately felt an electric chill down his groins, just like Bros Shina told me. A woman was soon asked to check if his claim was true. “Yes o the thing no gree stand o be tashi ba”, she screamed. I became very curious and came closer to the crowd, the man was lying and crying, helpless like a child as he sat on the floor amidst the crowd. “Waya sace maka? Wane? Who stole your genitals? ”, People kept asking him repeatedly. He managed to describe the person as he sobbed in between, “he was a tall man, he was wearing a black jeans trouser and a white T-shirt and, he walked right into this building”, pointing opposite the crowd. With the loud noise from the crowd, Bros Shina never came out. The crowd now was becoming larger as passers-by were stopping to see what was going on. The loud and vociferous crowd, mostly young boys soon started yelling and moving violently towards the Boda Shina’s flat yelling-“Ina yake! ina ke!”. I stood in frustration trying to wonder what to make of this, as this puzzle ate into my soul deeply. “What? That was Boda Shina! Every description he said was Bros Shina”, I murmured in confusion. “…But Bros Shina? How can it be Bros Shina? ” -Alhaji Bawa a rich and well respected man in our street who also had been watching from his balcony quickly understood what was next, he came out and spoke immediately to crowd in Hausa They listened and for a moment the crowd was calm like a still water, but some were still agitating, he went into Brother Shina ‘s flat. Soon afterwards, a voice came from the crowd, “ya da wo ya dawo, its back its back”. It was the boy with the missing genitals, I could see tears of joy in his face as he kept yelling “ya dawo”. Alhaji Bawa came out of the house and told the boys to leave the environment as they were still agitating to lynch the culprit. That was the last time I saw Bros Shina, as he left for Lagos the following morning and never to return. I miss Bros Shina, I miss our evening gist. *source http://www.tlkdrum.com/bros-shina-short-story/ Copyright-Mayo Bayo 2015 Hope you enjoyed it?
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| Politics › Shey All Na Packaging? by ebbymayox(op): 1:36am On May 24, 2015 |
When we say Machines we think German, when we say Vodka we think Russia, we say Robot we think Japanese, talk about Wine we think French. Talk about Nigeria we think...? So I was thinking of something peculiar to Nigerian, something positive, something we do others don’t do quite often, something we are good at not the usual 419 fraud you often hear about us. Well, after thinking, eating, sleeping, then back to thinking again, I finally came up with something, something I bet no country does better than we do. It's called packaging. Yeah PACKAGING! I am not talking about the product packaging in the manufacturing process, so if you're a not a Nigerian you're most likely to get lost somewhere in this article, but never mind you will soon get to find yourself somewhere in between. So yes packaging, talk about packaging think Nigeria. So what is "packaging" in this sense? A Nigerian will have two expensive smart phones and will never recharge more than hundred Naira airtime on each. continue reading http://www.tlkdrum.com/shey-all-na-packaging/ |
| Romance › Re: 5 Kinds Of Male Friends Every Nigerian Girl Has by ebbymayox(op): 7:49pm On May 20, 2015 |
hahahah u smart die be that o Tashaamania: |
| Romance › Re: 5 Kinds Of Male Friends Every Nigerian Girl Has by ebbymayox(op): 11:03pm On May 19, 2015 |
people love for different reason, some love for money,some love for appearance, some love for secuirty, some love for citizenship. Whichever one she chooses that's her choice, and you can't judge her for that.And talking about the category I belong to, check the write up again I wrote it towards the ending part Rexhenrex: |
| Romance › Re: 5 Kinds Of Male Friends Every Nigerian Girl Has by ebbymayox(op): 9:34pm On May 19, 2015 |
That's cool then if it's 65percent,atleast more than 50 lol QueenHeart: |
| Romance › 5 Kinds Of Male Friends Every Nigerian Girl Has by ebbymayox(op): 9:12pm On May 19, 2015*. Modified: 12:31am On May 20, 2015 |
written by Mayo Bayo, culled from http://www.tlkdrum.com/5-kinds-of-male-friends-every-nigerian-girl-have For Every Girl there is 3 Guys: The One She Wants, The One That Wants Her and the One She's Settling For. It’s that simple. Most girls want that All-in-one guy, the guy that can be funny, romantic, caring, smart, cute, well-built etc. But a man can’t have it all just a like a woman can’t also , either he has this and doesn’t have that or vice versa. But women wish they could have a man with all that qualities. So since finding Mr. All-in -one guy. is just fantasy, girls have outsmarted this situation, they now keep a nice mental list of group of male friends who play different roles to fulfil their wish. It really doesn’t matter if she’s single or not, as the saying goes No girl is single, you either snatch her from someone or share her with someone, if a girl has you as her boyfriend it means you are the highest shareholder, which is good so don’t think she doesn’t have other guys loitering around her, of course she does. It’s not flirting to me since she is not really dating them, they are just there to keep the “ministry” going forward, or can you be the all-in-one guy? Can you always be there when she is sad, can you always make her laugh, and can you always give her the best advice? Well as a tradition, I have categorized this into a listicle of 5: The Naughty Boy- Yeah Mr. Naughty. She can discuss anything nasty comfortably with this dude, this dude is usually the guy girl’s see as the bad guy. And the truth is girls secretly admire the bad guys but won’t like to date them, they want the bad guy to be good for them, which is not possible so they keep them around for just that purpose. Mr. Good Sense of Humor- He’s the funny dude, he always make her laugh irrespective of her mood. Once she is having a terrible day, she writes him on WhatsApp “hello” and the next moment she is cracking up, as the guy would have typed something really funny during the chat. This dude is probably her fav guy but she can’t date him since he is most likely to be a broke ass. Mr. Counsellor- She needs advice, she goes to him. He is always the listening type. He listens carefully to her and always give her great advice. When her present relationship is sinking, she runs to this dude, and most times he always have an advice for every situation. Most likely this dude is that best ex bf she once had or her Bff. When a girl is having relationship troubles, she always want to have a male perspective of the situation, so she speak to her male friend who can offer first-hand advice about her problem.Men understand men better than women understand men, so it's kind of logical. Money bag a.k.a. Omo babaolowo- The money spender, he is willing to lavish cash on her anytime and help her materially. He is the very busy dude and hardly have time for her but when she needs financial assistance, she’s always there ‘cos he still hopes he will date her someday. The Nerd Nerds are not left out, most girls also have that dude who is very smart and good with books but socially awkward. She always like to discuss intellectual stuffs with him, ask him for help with her school work etc. But she won’t date him of course, because he’s too nerdy and think of life through pages in a book .So he is added to her list of male friends. The truth is, all guys fall into one of the above category, either you’re the Mr. Naughty or the Nerdy. I am always the Mr. Good sense of humor and sometimes Mr. Counsellor .Which one are you? Note this doesn’t make a girl a flirt or a “runs girl”, she aint dating any of them but you, so be happy she chose you. Copyright c.Mayo Bayo.If you must lift this content please kindly credit the source http://www.tlkdrum.com/5-kinds-of-male-friends-every-nigerian-girl-have |
| Jokes Etc › If English Proverbs Where Formed By A Nigerian.. by ebbymayox(op): 10:45pm On May 16, 2015 |
Just decided to twist some popular english sayings to a Nigerian perception Dont judge a buka by its offer. dont count ur maga before they pay ( dont count you chick before they hatch) A journey of a thousand miles begins with Buhari winning the election. All work and no Play makes Emeka owns several containers. Better eeyah than sorry( Better safe than sorry) He who lives in borno shouldn't throw banger( He who leaves in a glass house...). Its no use crying over a spilled alomo. When there is weed, there is a way Dont judge a man till you've have walked in his palm slippers. Eat the humble "moi moi" ( eat the humble pie pie) @Mayo Bayo www. tlkdrum.com add yours 1 Like 1 Share |
| Politics › What Is The Nigerian Dream? by ebbymayox(op): 10:04pm On May 11, 2015 |
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