₦airaland Forum

Are you a foreigner dating ,planning to marry, or may be married to a Nigerian man? re you planning to move back to Nigeria with your newly wedded charming Nigerian man? There are some important stuffs you need know beforehand. Before I continue will like to state that you disregard my title (pun intended), this really isn’t a manual, and else it sound like a Nigerian man is a machine

There are a lot of stereotypes on the internet about dating Nigerian men, but like you already know there is always two side to a coin. I will be talking more here about a decent Nigerian man, or isn’t that what you’re looking for or prefer to have?. So how is a descent Nigerian different, or aren’t men the same around the world?

Of course men can't be the same, we might have similar triggers and desires but not the same cultural upbringing, values or expectations.

I am not a relationship expert but I am decent Nigerian man so I know a lot about us. Here I will be giving heads up about some dos and don’ts you should prepare yourself for when dating or marrying a descent Nigerian man (note that I said descent Nigerian)

People go into inter racial marriages for different reasons, and like any other inter racial marriage, there will always be a cultural shock when two people with different backgrounds are in a relationship.



For you to truly show you love a Nigerian man, you need to embrace his people and cultures.

We Nigerians are everywhere, in the unexpected places you will find us. Someone once said Nigerian are like a coca cola drink, you find then everywhere, this is often because we like to travel and explore, we Nigerians call it- Hustle. This account for the reason why we have a very high interracial marriage ratio.

Nigeria is a country made up of a lot of tribes, every tribe has its own unique culture same also for the dos and don’ts

Regardless, Nigerian men have a lot in common due the fact that the Nigerian culture share some common values and ethics, and don’t get me wrong here, all Nigerian men are not the same, just like all your fingers are not equal

First don’t try to change a Nigerian man to suit your standards, while it may seems that you’re winning the race it won’t take long for him to erupt, so it’s better you learn and try to come to a compromise with his ways. We grew up in families that hold strong cultural ethics, ethics that may take you some time to understand.

To make things quite easy and lovely for you, I will be explaining the dos and don’ts in a list so you have less problem dating Nigerian men.

read the list after the cut :http://www.tlkdrum.com/the-manual-to-dating-a-nigerian-man/

Are you a foreigner dating ,planning to marry, or may be married to a Nigerian man? re you planning to move back to Nigeria with your newly wedded charming Nigerian man? There are some important stuffs you need know beforehand. Before I continue will like to state that you disregard my title (pun intended), this really isn’t a manual, and else it sound like a Nigerian man is a machine

There are a lot of stereotypes on the internet about dating Nigerian men, but like you already know there is always two side to a coin. I will be talking more here about a decent Nigerian man, or isn’t that what you’re looking for or prefer to have?. So how is a descent Nigerian different, or aren’t men the same around the world?

Of course men can't be the same, we might have similar triggers and desires but not the same cultural upbringing, values or expectations.

I am not a relationship expert but I am decent Nigerian man so I know a lot about us. Here I will be giving heads up about some dos and don’ts you should prepare yourself for when dating or marrying a descent Nigerian man (note that I said descent Nigerian)

People go into inter racial marriages for different reasons, and like any other inter racial marriage, there will always be a cultural shock when two people with different backgrounds are in a relationship.



For you to truly show you love a Nigerian man, you need to embrace his people and cultures.

We Nigerians are everywhere, in the unexpected places you will find us. Someone once said Nigerian are like a coca cola drink, you find then everywhere, this is often because we like to travel and explore, we Nigerians call it- Hustle. This account for the reason why we have a very high interracial marriage ratio.

Nigeria is a country made up of a lot of tribes, every tribe has its own unique culture same also for the dos and don’ts

Regardless, Nigerian men have a lot in common due the fact that the Nigerian culture share some common values and ethics, and don’t get me wrong here, all Nigerian men are not the same, just like all your fingers are not equal

First don’t try to change a Nigerian man to suit your standards, while it may seems that you’re winning the race it won’t take long for him to erupt, so it’s better you learn and try to come to a compromise with his ways. We grew up in families that hold strong cultural ethics, ethics that may take you some time to understand.

To make things quite easy and lovely for you, I will be explaining the dos and don’ts in a list so you have less problem dating Nigerian men.

read the list after the cut :http://www.tlkdrum.com/the-manual-to-dating-a-nigerian-man/

BY MAYO BAYO

ezeonline2:
Source: http://loadedstuff.com/15-signs-that-confirm-youre-a-typical-nigerian/

HS POST WAS WRITTEN BY ME AND POSTED ON http://www.tlkdrum.com/15-signs-youre-a-typical-nigerian/

I HATE WHEN PEOPLE STEAL MY WRITE UP AND THEN GET CREDIT FOR IT

THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME.

ALL THIS FAKE ASS SHITTY LAZY NIGERIAN BLOGGERS,ALL THEY DO IS WAIT AND STEAL YOUR POST.

NONSENSE

I AM REPORTING THIS POST TO GOOGLE STRAIGHT AWAY[size=20[b][/b]pt][/size]

Unibenstudent:
hMmm..what is ur name ifa may ask,,because badoo is not a name.

no b only ifa may ask,na sango may ask lol

By Mayo Bayo www.tlkdrum.com

Akpors or Akpos has the case might be is a Nigerian character who has become very synonymous with comic,cleverness, mischief and foolishness.In most of the jokes that are about akpors, you would usually find the joke centered round a young man who either gets into trouble for making certain comments, or does a very foolish thing that puts him in trouble, whatever form the jokes take, you would always get to laugh yourself off. Here are Top 10 Hilarious Akpors Jokes on the Internet that will make you laugh your yourself off.Don't forget



1[b].An illiterate Father(akpos) with his Educated[/b]


An illiterate Father(akpos) with his Educated son went on a camping trip. They set up their tent and fell asleep.
Some hours later, Akpos wakes his Son up and asks " Look up to the sky and tell me what you see?" son: "I see millions of stars."
Akpos: "What does that tell you son?
Son: "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of Galaxies & Planets."
Akpos slaps Son hard and says, "You idiot! Pesin don thief our Tent(meaning,Someone has stolen our tent)

Moral:It’s one thing to be educated,it’s another thing to have common sense



2.Barrister Akpors and the Village Farmer



Barrister Akpors who's gone to the village for Xmas celebration went hunting in a nearby village.

He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence.

As Barrister Akpors climbed over the fence, an elderly gentleman asked him what he was doing.

He responded,

"I shot a duck and it fell in this field, I'm going in to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied,

"This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

Arrogant Akpors said,

"I am one of the best trial attorneys in this country, and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything!"

The old farmer smiled and said,

"Apparently, you don't know how we do things here. We settle small disagreements like this with the Three-Kick Rule."

Barrister Akpors asked,

"What is the three-Kick Rule?"

The Farmer replied,

"Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."

Barrister Akpors quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old farmer.

He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly walked up to him.

His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into Akpor's groin and dropped him to his knees.

His second kick nearly wiped Akpors' nose off his face.

Barrister Akpors was flat on his belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up.

He eventually summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said,

"Okay, you old farmer, now it's my turn."

The farmer smiled and said,

"Now, I give up. You can have the duck."



Moral: No matter how well educated you are, RESPECT YOUR ELDERS!



3.Akpor's and his teacher



Teacher: Behind every successful man there is a woman. Class what do we learn from this?

Akpos: We should stop wasting time in studies and find that WOMAN.

4.Akpos and the Cannibals



Akpos, Musa and Rukewe were lost in a forest and captured by cannibals. The king of d cannibals told them they had a chance to live if only they could pass a testl. The 1st step was to go deep into d forest n get 10 pieces of d same kind of fruits.
The three men went their separate ways to gather fruits. Rukewe came back and said to the king,
"I brought 10 apples", the king explained the trial to him, 'you have to snif the fruits up into your butt without any expression on your face or you will be killed. The 1st apple went in, but on the 2nd one, he winced out in pain, so he was killed.
Akpos the smart guy arrived and showed the king ten (10) berries. When d king explained the trial to him, he thought to himself that this should be easy,
1,2,3,4 ,5,6,7,8 nd on the ninth berry, he burst out in laughter and was killed.
Rukewe n Akpos met in heaven. The rukewe asked, "why did you laugh?", you almost got away with the trial", Akpos replied,"I couldn't help it, I saw the Oga Musa coming with pineapples

5.At the bus stop



Akpos got to School late on Monday Morning and his teacher asked; Teacher: Why did u come late to skool?.
Akpos: One man lost 1000 naira note at the Bus Stop.
Teacher: ohhh...I see..were you helping him to look for the money?. Akpos: No!!.. I DEY CRAZE...Na me stand on top d money since!(meaning am I mad?,I was the one standing on the money)

6.Akpos in a Brothel



Akpos knocked on the gate of a brothel in a red light district. The madam opened the brothel door to see a young man called Akpos. His clothes were all tattered and he looked needy.??
can I help you?” the madam asked.??
I want Onome,” Akpos replied.??
Young Man, Onome is one of our most expensive ladies, perhaps someone else…”??
No, I must see Onome.” Akpos replied. Just then Onome appeared and announced to Akpos that she charges N50,000 per visit.??
Akpos never blinked and reached into his pocket and handed her fifty pieces of N1,000 notes. The two went up to a room for an hour whereupon Akpos calmly left.
The next night he appeared again demanding Onome.
Onome explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row and that there were no discounts. it was still N50,000. Again Akpos took out the money, the two went up to the room and he calmly left an hour later
When Akpos showed up the third consecutive night, no one could believe it. Again he handed Onome the money and up to the room they went.

At the end of the hour Onome questioned Akpos: “No one has ever used my services three nights in a row… where are you from?”??
Akpos replied, “I am from Warri.” “Really?” replied Onome, “I have a brother who lives there and does business.”??
Yes; I know,” Akpos replied. “He gave me N150,000 to give to you.



7.Akpos walks into a barber shop



Akpos walks into a barber shop,and asked,"can I get a haircut?" The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, "About 2 hours." Akpos left. A few days later Akpos stuck his head in the door again and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut, The barber looked around at the shop and said, "About 3 hours." Akpos left.

A week later akpos came into the shop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?"
The barber looked around the shop and said, "About an hour only." The akpos left.

The barber turned to a friend and said, "Hey,Kufure, do me a favour. Follow that guy and see where he goes. He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut but then he doesn't ever come back. "

A little while later, he returned to the shop, laughing hysterically.
The barber asked, "So where does that guy go when he leaves?"

Kufure looked up, tears in his eyes and said,
"To your wife."

8.Akpors to Ekaitte

Akpors to Ekaitte: I can make u say 'I LOVE U'.

Ekaitte: No wayyy!!
Akpors: Bet?

Ekaitte: Yes.

Akpors: Ok start... Say blue?

Ekaitte: Blue.

Akpors: Say pink?

Ekaitte: Pink.

Akpors: Say love?

Ekaitte: Love.

Akpors: What's 1 1?

Ekaitte: 2

Akpors: Ur age?

Ekaitte : 22

Akpors: Hahahaha... I told you I could make you say 22!!

Ekaitte: No, you said you could make me say 'I LOVE U'

Akpors: Yes yes.. I just did.


9.Akpors and his Teacher

Teacher: Whoever answer my next question correctly can go home.

Upon hearing this, Akpos threw his bag outside through the window.

Teacher: Who threw the bag?

Akpos: Me, can I go home now?



10.A trip to Italy

A Ekaitte (akpor's wife) goes to Italy to attend a 2-week, company training session.

... Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.

Ekaittes : 'Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you?'

Akpors: laughs and says: 'An Italian girl!!!'
The wife kept quiet and left.
Two weeks later he picks her up in the airport and asks: 'So, honey, how was the trip?'
'Very good, thank you.' 'And, what happened to my present?'

'Which present?' She asked.
'The one I asked for - an Italian girl!!'
'Oh, that' she said 'Well, I did what I could, now we have to wait for 9 months to see if it
is a girl !!!'

Moral of the story: Don't tempt a woman, they are dangerously intelligent!

Extra-Akpos and the White man
Black man Akpos and a white
man were seated on plane.

Akpos had a bunch of banana, while the
white man had a monkey.

Akpos wanted to go to the toilet, so he
said to the white man “Please watch over
my bananas, while I’m gone”.

He went, came back and found out that the
bananas were all gone. The white man
pointed at the monkey and said, ”your
brother the monkey ate all of them”.

Akpos smiled and said nothing. Minutes
later, the white man said, “Please hold my
monkey while I pee”.

He came back and met the monkey dead.

He asked Akpos what happened and he
replied, “This is a family matter, please stay
out of it!”

Extra-Akpos the Inspector

A woman reporting to the police: Sir, my husband went to by potatoes 5 days ago and he is not back up to now.
inspector Akpos: why not cook something else abi,or is it only potatoes you like to eat

if you didn't laugh all through this,then your problems are bigger than the jokes.My Brother you need a therapist.Source http://www.tlkdrum.com/top-10-akpors-jokes-that-will-crack-your-ribs/

it will b nice you add your tribe or ethnic in bracket.Wanna use this for a cultural project

Ife(Yoruba)

Redoil:
Nigerians dont attend cinimas except they are going there to pick pocket or sleep. So where do the op get all these rubbish from.

dey no tell u make u stop smoke igbo?

source:www.tlkdrum.com

written by mayo bayo

I went to 3 different cinemas in Lagos and I met these 10 categories of people:

The Commentator

As Chiwetel Ejiofor, who played the role of Odenigbo was looking into the Olanna’s eye in the movie half of the yellow sun, a romantic scene was gradually building up … next thing was this loud guy in the middle row of the cinema hall shouting,
“Correct guy! I dey feel you joo!. Kiss am, you too dey form jare! You just dey dull”.

At this moment I felt like punching this dude right on his balls. His loud outburst just kept interrupting my favorite scenes .To himself he was whispering, to me he was just another loud jerk.Like why now, this is not a football match we don’t need your commentary!

Loud chewer

Popcorn and movies go hand in hand,don’t know the history about this ,it’s a tradition everywhere in the world but do you have to chew out loud like a Sokoto gudali cattle ? I have seen your popcorn, do I have to hear it too?

1 The leg stretcher

I was still wondering where the smell was coming from, only to see some dude with his sugar cane legs close to my nose killing it softly with his stinky socks. Why not just position them to your row and not stretch them towards my sit?

2 He who laughs last …

Laugh best they say, but that was not the case for this guy that sat on the row before me, 60secs after the scene this dude is still HAHA-ing! Ok that scene was funny, yes and we all laughed but can you now shut up so that we can hear what’s coming next?

3 The questioner

“Chairman please what did he just said that was funny?”

I was like what the hell, did I pay to come narrate movies, or what are your satellite dish ears made for. Ok I didn’t say that, else I would have been writing this post from hospital bed. You need to see the guys’ biceps

4 The Bokoharam baby

Smiling at the large screen and sipping my Pepsi … and all of a sudden this baby starts bawling its lungs out, I cringed at the noise. Secretly I felt like squashing the little bugger (don’t think I am psychopathic).
Why do some mothers bring their baby to the cinema? Why not just sit in your house and enjoy a DVD movie with your family. Stop torturing the poor kid with high Dolby surround sound from those gigantic speakers

more on the list after the cut
.http://www.tlkdrum.com/annoying-kind-of-nigerians-i-met-at-the-cinema/

becos it's funny?

Maakhir:
Why was this posted on jokes section and not general??

It's her page,I confirmed that ,check her other post also.And the facebook profile link to her blog is her offcial profile

parrotibaba:
@op how r u sure dat it's Stephanie dat runs d blog n not some dude/chick? I checked d blog n I read d author's section n it was describing who she was n her ability to diversify

Count your blessings, Instagram them one by one. Oh yes that’s the new saying now. We Nigerians like to show off, and instagram was made for our lifestyle. If you still don’t have an Instagram account you missing a lot.Infact you’re most likely to be lost in this post, so go download and signup on instagram

HERE ARE THE 10 TYPES OF NIGERIANS YOU FIND ON INSTAGRAM:
1. Team Kfb
This is the most annoying group of people on Instagram, they comment kfb on almost every post. Well for those that don’t know what kfb means, it means definitely you’re not on Instagram, go sign up and find out what it means lol. Begging for a “follow back” after every comment or post you see is rude and not polite, he will follow you if he/she wants to. I saw people posting kfb on Beyoncé Instagram page, Beyoncé’s doesn’t even follow Jay z so why will she follow you? .How do I know this?, check her Instagram page, she has 19 million followers and the babe doesn’t give a shit about following anybody(zero followers)



2. Filter Lords
I sometimes use filters when necessary but there is this group of people that can’t just do without filter on any pictures they post, I call them the Instagram Dencia (Her royal majesty of skin toning, nah that sound too nice, bleaching queen I mean). You now see the Dolapo, alias walking shadow, your old secondary school crush all of a sudden looking so light skin on Instagram, and you start wondering isn’t that Dolapo omo Iya alamala ?BEFORE

3. The Selfie Babe/Duck face
It’s not only girls nowadays that take selfies in front of a mirror even boys do also, yeah even me sometimes. All they do on Instagram is post selfies of themselves most of the time making some funny duck face. Are you a Duck Leave Duck face for Ducks and be Human!



4.Mr “like all pictures”
This group of people,mostly guys, don’t post or comment that often; all they do is like any picture posted as if they’re been paid to do so.You check your news feed and you see Obinna liked 90 pictures(20 seconds ago),nna when will Oga Obinna post his own pictures now?

5.The Comedian
The chief obi class of people, these are the ones that truly make Instagram interesting and fun, they’re always posting short funny videos that will make you laugh your ass off. If you don’t have the likes of chief obi, funnyAfrica pics,iamdulo,oluwakaponeski,crazeclown ,foxy p etc on your instagram list then you’re missing out a lot of laughter. They are the ones that have gotten fame and cash through Instagram, gone are those days when you have to be seen on TV to be popular, these days just post funny videos ,get more followers and you can sign your autograph on a female fan’s boobs lol.


6.Mr.”Na me gym pass”
He is always in the gym, posting pictures of his “8 packs”.You wonder if he’s got a day time job



7.The fashionista
#floraljumpsuit #sundayRedandWhiteAnkara #iroAndBuba #newlook,these are the kind of hashtags you see on their daily fashion posts. It’s always about the cloth they wore on Monday or the iro and buba they wore to church last Sunday. They have the most colorful Instagram page,’cos it’s always about the right color worn.I like this group sha !



8. The Hashtag Assassins
The Chuck Norris and James Bond of hashtags. Let me first confess, I was also a member till I understood what hashtags are meant for. Hashtags are used so Instagram search engines can find and categorize pictures with same tags.For instance, if you type #puffpuff in one of your pictures, any user anywhere in the world looking for “puffpuff” can find your picture. How can someone type a hashtag looking like a page from Edet and Simbi English Textbook and expect another user somewhere to find his picture .Biko don’t string too many words together with a single hashtag

the list continues here:http://www.tlkdrum.com/the-10-types-of-nigerians-you-find-on-instagram/
Source:http://www.tlkdrum.com/
written by:MAYO bAYO

So which group do you belong too? If you like my post follow me on Instagram @mayorblades

I no go mind the kiss o,but sisterly lol

iyabodeh:
It all makes so much sense I want kiss you with my sisterly lips.

"Na yiansh dey describe the kain seat wey go contain am"
Translation: don't do anything beyond your means.

clemz85:
but the shiit still dey there

you know observe say i type am with double ii

thanks bro

jkendy:
At least we need something like this to calm down the nerves after too much woeful debates on GEJ vs GMB





Nice one @ OP

This same post I did on nairaland was from my blog http://www.tlkdrum.com/18-nigerian-pidgin-proverbs-that-will-surely-make-you-laugh/.

Only for me to see my post on Stephanie Okereke's blog the next day without a single credit back to me.
http://www.stephaniedaily.com/nigerian-pidgin-proverbs-that-will-surely-make-you-laugh/


WHY?? THIS ARE THE SAMER ARTIST/ARTRESS THAT COMPLAIN ABOUT ALABA BOY PIRATING THEIR MOVIES.

Talk About Double Standard.

d.

AceOfDiamonds:
Excellent Work!

Mprex:
Nice compilation

Thanks

DELETED

neily:
Why u dey drink panadol for another person headache?
Meaning: Why are you interfering in another person's business

checkdate:
Man wey Unclad ?



Pls who is edithing this kind of write up ?

it was man wey naked,but Oga seun don't disable and replace some words automatically.type the word shiit in a post and u see somethng else.

Man wey naked no dey put hand for pocket

loose translation:You can't do somethings if there are no certain conditions.


Chicken wey run way from borno go Ibadan go still end up inside pot of soup

loose translation:You Can't Run Away From Your Destiny


Today’s newspaper na tomorrow Suya wrap

loose translation:Keep calm! Nothing last forever


Cow wey dey in a hurry to go America go come back as corn beef

loose translation:Just be patient. Let the game come to you. Don't rush!


Akara and moin moin get the same parent na wetin dey pass tru make dem diffrent

loose translation:How you start doesn't matter,what matters is how you finish.


Wetin consign agbero with twitter handle,or malu/cow with face cap?

loose translation:Mind your business.



If life dey show you pepper,my guy make pepper soup from am

loose translation:Make something good out of a bad experience



I get am before No be property

loose translation: stop living in the past and start living in the present.



If person too tey for party e go follow dem wash plate

loose translation:Don't outstay your welcome



Rolling stone,ofcourse na person push am now!

loose translation:There is always a reason for something



Craze no hard to form,na the trekking be wahala

loose translation:Easier said than done



No matter how hot your tempa be,e no fit boil beans.

loose translation:Calm down,your temper won't solve the problem



Every mallam with em own kettle,every aboki with em own radio.

loose translation:Every man for himself



You no need cutlery to chop slap

loose translation:You don't need my translation to understand this,lol



Opolo eye no be open eye

loose translation: Having Big eyes doesn't make you civilised,lol



Leave matter for Mathias and Sabi for Sabinus.

loose translation:Give everyone what they deserve.



Bring suya, bring suya,.......na cow body dey suffer am.

loose translation:Every action has a consequence



E go better e go better,na im make ibo man still dey Kano

loose translation:When there is hope,there is Life.

The different between kpekere and plantain chips na packaging
loose translation:Don't judge based on appearance alone

Escort me, Escort me, naim slave trade take start.

loose translation:Serious things sometimes start like joke



[b]Na from play play dem dey form PLAYER

loose translation:Serious things sometimes start like joke


Pikin wen use agbada take stat guy go talk wetin e go wear wen e old.

loose translation:Slow and steady wins the race



The water wey dem use take make eba can never be recovered back.

loose translation:Don't cry over spilt milk
Which is your favourite?


Source:

http://www.tlkdrum.com/18-nigerian-pidgin-proverbs-that-will-surely-make-you-laugh/

We live in the internet age,one doesn’t really need much to get popular, a sex tape from an estranged lover will just do fine.Well in this case, I am not talking about a sex tape ,it’s about a viral 2d animation which we Nigerians prefer to call “cartoon”.This animation is called Aje Vs Kpako.

We most times see funny viral videos but never know or bother finding out the creative people behind it .I got this cartoon from a whatsapp broadcast by a friend.I watched and really liked it.The fact that I could relate easily to it did the magic.

It was about a nursery school rhymes between two kids ,the aje kpako and the aje bota created by Ajebotoons. I sang along to all the songs like a true Aje kpako.If you haven’t still watch the video,you’re on a long thing.After some little google search,I found the creator of the 2d animation and what I found out was quite unexpected.Here is our little chat or should I call it interview

Here is the video(voiced by the Nigerian comedian-Maleke):http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6UdgMEHUdLM



Our Chat/Interview
Báyò Máyò: Hello ,So can you tell us a little first about yourself?

Ajebotoons: My name is Eguvwe Majomi Yugbovwre, but people call me Emy. They are my initials,plus its easier to pronounce. Lol. I’m number 11 out of 11 kids from my parents. Yes one powerful woman. And i am the creator and founder of Ajebotoons, a Nigerian 2D animation company.

Báyò Máyò: wow 11,that’s a football squad,lol

Ajebotoons: Yeah 11. Hahahaha

Báyò Máyò: no subsitiute player?

Ajebotoons: Lol..nah. Not that I know of

Ajebotoons: I graduated with a BA in Mass Communications from the University of Portharcourt and I am a self trained animator.

Ajebotoons: I also got an award for best in 3D animation class of 2011,for New York Film Academy/ Delyork. When they came to Nigeria for a training.

Báyò Máyò: so how did you venture into animation?

Ajebotoons: I’ve always loved cartoons, and discovered I could learn to make them move in late 2009

Báyò Máyò: It was quite interesting when I found out that Emy,is a lady

Ajebotoons: Yeah a lot of people do not believe it that was the reason I had to make a new video introducing myself at the end of the video

.EMY

Báyò Máyò: So what inspired you to do the video?

Ajebotoons:Well, first of all,the audio was done by some comedians in portharcourt (cant mention their names here), it was public property, and has been out for years till I came across it in 2011. I liked it and every time I listened to it I could visualize those my characters,so I decided to created an animation for it recently,in 2014. That was the beginning of Aje vs Kpako

Báyò Máyò: so how do you see the male dominated animation industry in Nigeria?

Ajebotoons: I don’t see it as a male dominated industry. I see it as an untapped industry in Nigeria. It’s still in its infancy,and I am glad to be a part of its growth in Nigeria.

Báyò Máyò: how did you get yourself into the New york film academy training?

Ajebotoons: Hmmm. It’s a funny story.

Báyò Máyò: I’m all ears

Ajebotoons: The fee was $5000 of which I or my parents could not afford.So I applied for scholarship.The training was for four weeks and I had never even seen a 3d software. The training started and I had not heard back from them. One week after they started I got a call and a text that I was accepted and could come in the following day. I was so excited. Only for me to get there and was told the 3D class was full and I should register into another class like maybe script writing or directing.

I was devastated. I was already close to tears. I quickly showed them my very wacky 2d shots I had then. Lol. And they were impressed. They called the “Oyinbo” man that was teaching the 3d class and he came down,looked at my work and was impressed. He said he would personally make sure Iget a seat in the 3D class,and that was it.

I did the 4weeks class in 3weeks and emerged d best. Lol

Báyò Máyò: Wow touching story.

Báyò Máyò:as a child ,my Heroes then were, Batman, Superman, Robin etc. Do You see the next generation of Nigerian kids having indigenious Super Heroes?

Ajebotoons: Especially with the way we are moving fast in the comic industry. Our Nigerian heroe characters in the comic industry are quickly picking up. Hopefully, the animations would too.

Báyò Máyò: Does the Nigerian comic/ animators have some sort of organization or body?

Ajebotoons: Yes we do. For comics, there is Comic Panel. And for animations it’s AwaFoundation (Animation West Africa Foundation). We are really working on a lot of things to improve both bodies.

Báyò Máyò: What advice do you have for young aspiring Nigerians especially girls with great dreams?

Ajebotoons: There will be loads and loads of challenges and discouragements from everywhere! But you have to ignore the negative world and hold on to your dream and push yourself. One day na one day. Lol

Báyò Máyò: hehehe abi o

Báyò Máyò: From your aje vs akpako video, which side of the coin do you fall in reality?lol

Ajebotoons: Hahahha.. Ah, I’m a Kpako oh! But everyone that know me will disagree. Lol

Ajebotoons: How about you?

Báyò Máyò: what’s below aje kpako?

Ajebotoons: Ah….. I dont know oh

Báyò Máyò: Ajemetal!

Ajebotoons: Hehehe

Báyò Máyò: one more question * still thinking

Báyò Máyò: so what inspires you?

Báyò Máyò: and how do you picture yourself in the animation industry in 10 years time?(that’s two question already sha)

Ajebotoons: What inspires me? Hmmm a lot of things. When I watch cartoon network and disney channel, I am always in awe and then I watch my nephews and nieces laugh. The joy in their faces is what inspires me. I do this to put smiles on faces. It tickles me seeing someone laugh at something I did.

As for the animation industry, in 10years,I see Ajebotoons as a huge name in the animation industry and making a mark in Nigeria. Changing lives using animations.

Báyò Máyò: thanks for the chat/interview Emy, you also have a good sense of humour

Ajebotoons: Thanks Mayo

Source:http://www.tlkdrum.com/meet-the-lady-behind-the-viral-cartoon-aje-vs-kpako/

Have you ever missed something you hate so much? If yes, you will be quite familiar with my feelings right now. The smell of gasoline at the gas station today brought back nostalgic memories of Lagos. Oh how I miss the smell of gasoline lacing the cool evening’s air, the aching song of our diesel engine that sings me to sleep every night.

Every city has its distinct features, this is what differentiates it from other places. For Lagos, Nigeria, it's the Generator (power generating machine), I guess there is no other City in the world that can boast of that much of generators. This is not just true for Lagos alone, you find generators everywhere in other cities in Nigeria.

Power generating machine which we often call generators in Nigeria are part of our daily lives. It’s a must have for everyone, rich, poor, middle class; everyone keeps one around. The average Nigerian don't keep pets but he does keep or have a Generator, so that makes Generator a pet in every Nigerian home. They are domestic pets, you feed them, protect them and take them to the “clinic” when they fall "sick". In fact, when designing a plan for your new house, generator has a special part of the building, especially for the bigger ones. For a country that has been gasping in the fumes of generators for over two decades, it has become a status symbol to be seen as being able to buy a set.

The number of generators can be roughly estimated not far from the Nigerian population, an estimated "90m resident’s use generators of varying sizes" and this figure is soaring each year with generators becoming cheaper.

Every Society relies on power, so it shouldn't be surprising to see the important role Generator (which is now a substitute for the poor supply from the national grid) plays in the lives of every Nigerian

They come in different brands and sizes from the very cheap "i better pass my neighbor" which is the common man priced possession to the Big for the upper class, these machines all have one thing in common-Noise and Pollution.
If you are new to Nigeria, the power situation takes a little getting used to. In my case I wasn’t new. I had only left my birth country for 3 years and returning wasn't a Mr. Bean's joke. At first it was difficult adjusting back to the life with frequent power outage and the daily dose of Carbon monoxide, but within few weeks I adjusted just like any Nigerian does and here I was shouting Up NEPA!
The feeling of power being available for longer hours becomes weird, you start wondering why is there still light, have they forgot to turn it off?

The dexterity my six years old cousin displays when starting the generator is beyond imagination. He had mastered the art.


Once there is a power cut, which is frequent and often night-long everyone is dashing out to start their generators, and it's only a matter of time before the orchestra of generators is been led by my neighbors 12.5 kVA generator. This "melody" sometimes goes all night long till they sing you to sleep.
It’s always a dilemma every evening. Once the light goes off, I have to choose either to enjoy the quiet serene with mosquitoes in the darkness, or switch on the generator and get drown into the loud sound. The later was always my choice.

With Nigeria's life expectancy rate at 52, which is considerably low, apart from the day to day risky activities that endanger our lives, the constant intake of air, richly laden in CO plays a big role in our poor health situation. Such Headlines such as "5 killed in generator fumes" is quite common, almost impossible a month passes by without an incident.

I was at Idumota Market in Lagos, with my friend, he came to pick up his clothes from his tailor. The building was choked up and poorly spaced, generators in every corner you go .It was indeed the biggest gathering of CO emitting machines I have ever seen.
In the small cubicle (about 3 meters square), here was a group of tailors including my friend’s tailor, who calls himself Sure boy sewing and dancing to a popular Nigerian song, by Davido in the dense fumes, another case of the popular Fela's suffering and smiling! What you don't know won't hurt you, right?

The interesting thing is people don’t really care about their health, your health is only important when you fall sick. I wonder if there is an Environmental Protection Agency in Nigeria, at least if the government can't provide regular power supply they should regulate exhaust emissions. After all, filters and catalytic converter would save a lot of Nigerians’ health.

Anyway, like every article that has been written about the state of power in Nigeria, this will also go into the garbage bin. You know why? The government doesn't really care about your health, they only want your vote during the next election.
Source:http://www.tlkdrum.com/generators-a-pet-in-every-nigerian-home/

I've enjoyed writing many posts about the things I like and love about Nigeria as well as providing insight on subjects based off of my experience. This post however is going to cover a subject I don't like about Nigeria; The Famous Lagos Traffic. There have been so many things that have happened to me or that I have witnessed in my years of riding through Lagos. And the only word that comes to mind to really put it all in perspective is 'Insanity'.

Before I get started, let me again state that I absolutely love the Street Vendors who walk in between the cars in traffic. They literally are saviors. They have everything available for you whether you are thirsty or hungry. They make the dreadful trips manageable.

Without further ado, here are a list of things that have happened, been witnessed and other observations that define the Insanity of Lagos Traffic.

The Police:

I come from a Country where Police are here to protect and serve. They aren't perfect and there are always instances of police brutality, unjustified killings and arrests as well as corruption. However, those instances only make up a small percentage of the actual good police do for us in the United States.

In Nigeria, I've been robbed at least 10 times. And everyone one of those instances were from the police. Whenever I go out in Lagos, I make sure I put most of my money in my shoe and put a little change in my pocket. The police like to stalk the beginning of the Third Mainland Bridge when leaving the Island to the Mainland. They also have various checkpoints on roads in Oshodi and Ikeja. They pull over whoever they want to. My car got pulled over a lot and I'm partially to blame for this. I prefer to sit in the front passenger seat when riding. I do this for 2 reasons. 1: I'm no better than the driver. He is a man trying to earn living to support his family just as I am. 2: I need air conditioning. I blast it on high and let the cold air blow all over my face. It's so hot in Nigeria, that taking a shower or bath in the morning is useless. By the time I'm done drying off, I'm sweating.

So we got pulled over a lot because the police saw a white guy in the car. The first few times I was intimidated by the experience. After about two years, I became quite good at arguing with them every time I got pulled over. I changed so much, that one time when I was back in the United States, I was pulled over picking my wife up from the Airport. I started arguing with the policeman and almost got arrested. You don't argue with the police in the United States. But I was still in a "Nigeria" frame of mind. When my wife got out of the airport, she saw me fiercely arguing with the policeman. She yelled to me, "what the hell are you doing?" I finally caught myself and apologized.

I finally got good at making this robbery experience short and painless. Since the bulk of my money was in my shoe, when I get pulled over and the Police talk "settlement", I empty out my pockets and show them that "this is all the money I have. Here, take it!". They take it, we move on. Here is the thing, you have to give them a settlement. If you don't, they search through your paperwork and find something wrong with it or make something up entirely. They will tell you that you have to go to the station and it costs a lot of money. But if you settle them, it's a small price to pay.

Definition: Robbery!

Yellow Buses(danfo):


Nothing infuriates me more than the yellow buses. They stop in the middle of the road. They block 2 or 3 lanes of traffic. They seem to stop every 10 feet to pick up passengers. Then you get to areas where there are designated bus stops like after the Third Mainland Bridge or farther north to Cement, and the buses are everywhere. People walking everywhere.

They don't obey any kind of common sense law. They will dent your car, take off your side mirrors, ram you from the back, and anything else. In Nigeria, you can't take for granted that every one on the road with you knows how to drive.

In the United States, the only time a car will beep their horn is if someone is cutting them off, preventing accidents, or letting people know in front of them that there is a green light and they should go.

In Nigeria, the horn is the lifeblood of driving. You beep your horn for every reason including just letting other cars know you are coming or letting people know you are turning. Or you might be the 300th car in the line of traffic and you will beep your horn because you are not moving even though the people in front of you can do nothing about it.

finish reading here http://www.tlkdrum.com/lagos-traffic-stories-of-insanity/

Thanks guys

By Mayo Bayo
Lying on my bed and singing out loudly to Asa’s music-Satan be gone playing in the background, here I was waiting patiently for the pot of rice I left on the cooker to get done. The weekend has just begun and my mood was just good.

A pop sound indicating a new message on Facebook interrupted my song. It was a like notification, a friend just liked my new profile picture .I scrolled through my news feed to catch up on what’s going on around the world with my friends, and I have been offline for like 12 hours.

Scrolling down gradually, I found beautiful pictures of a vacation trip a friend just posted. After flipping through to the last pictures, my mood changed, the happy me all of a sudden became moody. I began yearning for a travel trip. The perception of my friend been happier with those beautiful landmark at his background, took away my mood,. Just to show how “happy” I was, I donated my like on the picture.

This is just among the few people on my friends list whose lives appears to be so perfect that it actually makes me feel bad about my own life.

Am I getting jealous?? Of course yes, is this worth my happiness? Hell No! Comparison is the thief of joy.

I managed to get myself back after I asked myself, do I want to be happy or to feel happier than others.

Using Facebook is not bad for well-being per se, it’s how you relate back. It’s amazing how good a life can look on Facebook. Mr. Zuck did a good job designing Facebook to help make our lives appear perfect.

I like Facebook, I am quite active there and I have learnt lots of stuffs and met quite a number of interesting people. Man is social being, so it shouldn’t be surprising that Facebook became part of our lives. But like every great product, there should always be where to draw the line. Life appears perfect or ideal on Facebook, people are only going to post the “good” things in order to project a certain image/perception of themselves, we all do that or who goes to post about his/her miserable life on Facebook??

There are a lot of people out there that get sad everyday just from their Facebook news feed, for some it’s the like button. A mere button suddenly becomes a common source of dissatisfaction, because he/she believes they are lacking attention judging by the fewer likes compared to some of their friends who had a 1000 likes on a post/picture. Trust me comparison will only lead you to depression. Number of likes on a Facebook picture or post, should remain numbers and not a factor for your happiness. finish reading here-http://www.tlkdrum.com/facebooks-envy-effect/