₦airaland Forum

Dear friends, ‪#‎ Dstv‬just announced daht all CHELSEA matches wiLL now be shown on cartoon network in order to pave way for serious MATCHES on SUPERSPORTS..... >>>
One win in August , One win in September , One win in October....>>>
CheLsea's wins are now coming once a month like the MENSTRUAL CIRCLE.....!!!

Dear friends, ‪#‎ Dstv‬just announced daht all CHELSEA matches wiLL now be shown on cartoon network in order to pave way for serious MATCHES on SUPERSPORTS..... >>>
One win in August , One win in September , One win in October....>>>
CheLsea's wins are now coming once a month like the MENSTRUAL CIRCLE.....!!!

My younger sister scored 209. She applied for Microbiology, what is her chances of securing admission? I hope she is well positioned for admission becoz I dont wanna see her around me anymore when her mates are studying in school next year.
And if what you're saying about the commencement in November is true, then that means they're likely to speed up admission stuffs this year. Any idea when they are writing the post-utme?

Am speechless. It looks to be going Buhari's way.
Let the Man who has Nigeria's best interest at heart win.

My 2cents.

Happy new year Jose Mourinho

JOSE MOURINHO AND BALL BOYS;



I used to like Mourinho but starting to think that old adage about absence making the heart grow fonder was at play, as I can now no longer stand him. Is he serious here?! He is the most hypocritical human being on the planet! His main tactic when coming up against a team with any sort of similar technical level to his own team is to waste time from the first whistle. Just a month ago against Liverpool they were holding onto the ball at throw ins and throwing themselves to ground - even saw Hazard attempting to get back up after a foul and being pushed back to the floor by Ivanovic to waste a few more seconds!
I'm surprised he didn't set his dog 'Hazard' on them again.
When Chelsea take the lead at Stamford Bridge, you've more chance of finding Richey Edwards than a Chelsea ball boy. Very revealing of the man's character that he often chooses to have a go at children that have no means to defend themselves when his team loses.
Dont get me wrong,he's a great manager, but absolute a**ehole of a human being. Fits Chelsea like a glove.

I'm sure this point has been made before but why does Wenger always talk about the great players he didn't sign? Does he think it's an example of how good the scouting department is cos I'm pretty sure both fans and players aren't happy that every other week he's saying that he almost signed Ronaldo before he went to United.
If I were you Wenger I'd start reminding people about how you didn't sign Kevin Doyle...
Am a little bit confused why Wenger still likes talking about the players he almost sign .When it comes to talking about players he almost signed, nobody beats Wenger. A man whose catchphrase has practically become "We tried to sign him when he was 18 or 25 ", usually following a defeat in which the player in question has had a particularly good game for the opposition.
A quick Google search reveals Wenger 'almost' signed Eden Hazard,Cristiano Ronaldo, Kun Aguero, Luis Suarez, Mario Balotelli, Carlos Tevez, David Beckham...and Phil Jones, and, um...James Forrest. No doubt that's just a small sample of the players he's mentioned over the years.
"Yeah, Messi? He's a good lad. We tried to sign him when I was at Monaco"
"Maradona? We had him on trial, but his agent wasn't interested"
"Elvis Presley? Yeah, we tried to sign him, but it turned out he couldn't play right back and he'd been dead for more than 30 years"


Rumour has it Arsene Wenger is going to have a press conference tomorrow to discuss what might have been if his Auntie had testicles.

We all know how much commercial clout Manchester United has on a global scale.
Every other company in the world wants a piece of the United pie by having their name linked with them in some way or another. Fans are normally only exposed to a club’s sponsors via the replica kit and whatever is sold inside the stadium on matchdays.

But, according to a list recently leaked on Twitter, the Old Trafford club almost have a sponsor absolutely everything known to man, from noodles to paint to diesel engines. No wonder they turn over more money than any club in the world. Who wouldn’t with this many sponsors…

Richiy:
As in eh. The person no do test run first. hahaha.

Lol...Babe you get mouth oo

DaGC:
If that's truly Tottenham's official handle, then Soldado don suffer. Kai!!

Hahaha.I was actually thinking about that too

bizngr:
Did Moses really part the Red sea? Because he struggled to part his Bottom from the #LFC bench last season. — JFT96 (@Gaucho364)

Our own Victor Moses
LFC = Liverpool FC

Yes oo

3coins:
". . . .why cant you turn soldado into a striker." #EPIC

I tell you..That and the Yaya Toure own is so funny.

bizngr:
PR Faux Pas... just like these >>> http://www.bizngr.com/case-studies/4-famous-marketing-faux-pas/

I actually find the coca cola one funny really.

Lovexme: Is it true you are dead, or you are just pretending? #AskJesus




lol..guy u no co kill me

Richiy:hahaha..PR gone awry. But that hashtag though. Anyways, that campaign has already gone sour. But they will live through. #askJesus indeed.




Lol.. I dont even know who came out with that hashtag though

Rendezvou go home, you're drunk.

Good on Manchester City, they do like to keep in touch with their fans even though they’ve got enough money and power to completely disregard them.

One of the ways they thought to keep the fans in the loop is with a Twitter Q&A with star winger Jesus Navas.


However, whoever came up with the brilliant #AskJesus hashtag unwittingly unleashed Twitter’s finest keyboard comedians to run amok and leave the club to sift through the jokes to find the serious enquiries.

Below is a selection of the finest and funniest questions posed to the Manchester City star.




What are you like on crosses? #ASKJESUS

— Unredacted Blue (@quagmireisablue)


Who is your favourite fictional character, someone like Harry Potter, or your Dad?

— SadFaceOtter (@SadFaceOtter)

LMAOO " @YayaToure_: You fed 5,000 people with 5 loaves and 2 fish, so why couldn't you be arsed to get me a cake on my birthday? #AskJesus"

— Nuwaha..17™ (@Nuwaha17)

Would you describe your early family life as stable? #AskJesus

— Ed O'Meara (@edfomeara)

Did you ever regret turning your back on carpentry as a career?

— Richard Woodward (@derbeian)

Is it annoying that – despite the fact you made 48 appearances last season – Richard Dawkins still doesn't believe you exist?

— Aidan JR (@mcandidate)

Did Moses really part the Red sea? Because he struggled to part his arse from the #LFC bench last season.

— JFT96 (@Gaucho364)

If you can convert water into wine, can you convert Soldaldo into a striker?

— Tottenham Hotspur (@Spurs0fficial)

Did you prefer City over Chelsea because their owner's a Roman?

— El Scouse (@elscouse)

When you were alive, did you feel Jewish neuroticism or catholic guilt? Did this change post resurrection?

— Amitai Winehouse (@awinehouse1)

Like seriously:




If Lagos traffic na athlete,He go win Mikel Obi for 100 meters race.

Yesterday saw the much anticipated launch of Apple’s iPhone 6.

With two screen sizes to choose from, Apple fans all over the world are now faced with the decision of a lifetime. Do they go for the smaller option in order to save pocket space, or do they go big with the 6 Plus and make it look like they’re carrying and iPad Mini around with them?


Well thankfully Man United fans don’t have such a difficult decision to make. That’s because it appears the iPhone 6 Plus is specifically designed to show more of the Premier League table in one go, which obviously means the Old Trafford faithful will be able to see their side’s league position without having to scroll down.



That’s if they don’t slip further down the league table, though…

John Terry on his 'Worst behaviour'

Is This The Best Man United Can Do?
There was a time when Thomas Vermaelen would have been a sensible signing for Manchester United, but that time was before two years of declining standards..





Rather than two bald men fighting over a comb, Manchester United and Barcelona's battle to sign Thomas Vermaelen is like two luscious-but-unruly haired men fighting over a comb with several teeth missing. Or an analogy much, much pithier that I can't conjure right now.
The absence of decent ideas is clearly also a problem for United and Barca. Two years ago we would have observed their pursuit of Vermaelen and nodded with approval, but in the intervening time the 28-year-old has endured a startling decline at Arsenal. Following fitness issues, poor form and glaring mistakes, Vermaelen is now a distant third choice for the fourth-best team in the Premier League.
For two teams who harbour title aspirations in the forthcoming campaign, that isn't the glowing scouting report to warrant such strong interest. And yet it hasn't deterred either United or Barca from offering around £10m for the Belgian. The fact that Vermaelen now has his pick of two of the biggest clubs in the world is both absurd and unexpected - an exit route from the Emirates bench beyond his wildest dreams.
The logic behind United's bid is that Louis van Gaal apparently wants a centre-back who is good on the ball which, ironically - in the Alanis Morissette definition - are thin on the ground. But even if that is the reason for Van Gaal's interest, Vermaelen simply hasn't proven his talent frequently enough over the past two years to suggest he would be a significant improvement to United's defence.
This leaves the club's fans facing a dilemma. Do they support Van Gaal unreservedly after his encouraging start or will they question an uninspiring move for an Arsenal cast-off? Vermaelen started only seven matches in the Premier League last season - including defeats to United and Everton - and came on in the first half of six-goal drubbings to Manchester City and Chelsea. Is that the recent CV required to replace Nemanja Vidic and Rio Ferdinand?
It's perhaps telling that Arsenal fans aren't particularly worried about the defender's impending departure, with Gooners holding various complaints against their faded hero. As Arsenal folded in the 2012/13 season, suffering embarrassing cup defeats to Bradford and Blackburn, Vermaelen failed to inspire a recovery amid the beginning of his personal negative spiral. Despite Arsenal eventually turning their form around and snatching fourth from Spurs, the captain played only 110 minutes in the run-in following a 2-1 defeat at White Hart Lane on March 3.
He has never been able to recover his place. Injuries have played a part, of course, but more pertinent issues include a frustrating tendency to be caught out of position. Switching off at key moments is arguably Vermaelen's biggest flaw, however, with Robin van Persie profiting from his former teammate's error to score his first goal against Arsenal at Old Trafford in 2012.
It is never encouraging to sign a player who is seen with a sense of pity, but that's exactly what United will be doing if they push ahead with a move for Vermaelen. "Vermaelen could leave us because he needs to play now," said Arsene Wenger. "We're in a position where it's difficult to stand in his way."
Van Gaal clearly isn't a man to shirk a challenge, and he will back himself to turn Vermaelen's career around if a deal can be concluded. But all the evidence suggests building a new defence around the Belgian is a considerable gamble and, with United hoping to bridge the gap from seventh to first, it's a risk they possibly can't afford to take.

Nice one phyno.
You're definitely going places.

Am wondering where the hell the likes Papillo is,to talk some senses into this man's head that he is about to make his son commit the blunder of his life.

Oluwaseytiano: I pity that ihenacho. If he allows someone to force an agent on him, then he will be not better than Julius Aghawoha, Wilson Oruma, Christian Obodo ,Andy Townsend, Jamie Rednapp, Garry Southgate etc. He should not allow greed of some old men who never saw money when they were playing football ruin his career. If i were to personally recommend an agent, at the top of the list would be Jorge Mendes.

I dont believe in Jorge Mendes's way of transfers.He likes to impose his client on the club he chooses especially on young players.....And he also have higher % in any deal he does...





There is one and only one agent for Nacho...None other that Mino Raiola.The best agent in football right now and has proven track record of finding good clubs for young players.

Please Nairalanders I will be travelling to France and Germany next year bt I cannot speak any of the languages....I will even stay for up to a month,Bt am beginning to imagine the language barrier am going to face over there.So please I want to ask is there any help I can get in learning some basic words in these languages?Something like English-Germany dictionary,English-French dictionary.I also have special affection for languagues like Spanish, Japanese and Italian.Please if there is anywhere I can download such application I would be grateful if any Nairalander can tell me..Or better still,If there is any other way I can learn this languagues please just help..thanx

CFCfan: I'll support Arsenal cos if they beat Utd tomorrow, they'll be 11 points ahead of the Red Devils.

As if Man utd need your support before they can win games...

Zumarocket: shotup u black ghanas

A black man calling another black man black??
Now that's racism at it peak.

Ammanda:I'll be reporting live from dubai as am among the presidential delegates to dubai to cheer the eaglet to victory.



We don hear

Tonniey:@ op, point of correction, d match is slated for 8:00pm Nigerian time. Check it out here


Match time is 5 P.M

MY VIEW ON MOYES;



Manchester United Football Club Coach Mr. David Moyes wont turn me to a drunk these last few weeks.
That was why I did not want him for my beloved team....He is a relic,shadows from the past and soon to fade from memory if he does not change..
His stupidity and ignorance regarding team selection and substitution is just like Peak milk. "It's in him"
For God sake who still play Ryan Gigss when Shinji Kagawa and Wilfred Zaha are staring glaringly from the bench?....Why would he took off Nani and bring on Gigss thereby killing the tempo and technicality dat Man United were enjoying...Moyes please start playing Kagawa and Zaha for us...It's not Zaha's fault that your daughter fell for him afterall u wont marry your daughter.
All Man United play this days is to pass the ball to a full-back for a crossing and am tired of seeing that,No wonder he keeps chasing Leighton Baines ....There is no cohesion and flair in the midfield and that need to be rectified with Kagawa featuring..
Our defence looks amateurish and sluggish,conceding very cheap goals.Give Jonny Evans playing time and put Ferdinand on the bench where he belongs.
I do not blame the strikers because without a functional midfield,goals wil be hard to come by....
It hurt when I see a bellow average player like Ashley young still playing for us and earning a whooping £110,000 a week,an amount of money that he hardly deserves..players like that should not be playing for us including-,Welbeck,Gigss,Valencia,Ferdinand and Cleverly-We should sell them and buy players with proven European pedigree.This is not to say players like Januzaj should not be given opportunity and I commend you for dat...But truth be told,it is hard to win the league with januzaj.
Sometimes I glance enviously at Manchester city's squad and I find quality that we very much need warming their bench and this is annoying..
How can Man United play eight matches and garner only 11 point languishing unenviably in 8 position?
Please Moyes do not come and spoil the good job that your legendary predecessor laboured to achieve.

Mr. Moyes do this basic things and stop being some sort of Dinosaur....Mind you this not everton,It's Manchester United we are talking about here for Christ sake...

Nigerian international goalkeeper Vincent Enyeama has kept 8 clean sheets in 10 Ligue 1 games and 5 clean sheet in his last 5 games for french club Lille.He has conceaded just 4 goals this season,making him the second best goalkeeper in Europe at the time of writing..
The only goalkeeper to get the better of Enyeama this season is As Roma's Morgan De santis.The Italian has kept 7 clean sheet in 8 Seria A games,Conceding only 1 goal in the process,thereby making him the best goalkeeper in Europe at the time of writing..




Nice one Enyeama,I wish you more clean sheets..