₦airaland Forum

Jammyudom:
nope I have taste and that is who I want to be with. No more no less. If I can't find it in my country,I go Western world. Over the years Our women deal with me...I have come this far to stoop low for any woman.

shegxi:
the big question would then be how responsible are you, yourself?

donkelvin10:
I am Don Kelvin in search of a true relationship....Any interested lady should call or Whatsapp me on +2349023630072

shegxi:
come to ikeja and I will show a lot of them.....for free of cos.

shegxi:
they are everywere....not just in the container you think they should be in.

Hamachi:
Do u know that...
Some of the problems we have today in our marriages, is from our upbringing.?
Ok wait lemmi explain!!!

The way we were brought up comes back to affect our marriage.

I have a friend who as a growing child, her dad was the breadwinner. He paid their fees, have money for foodstuffs , paid the rent and helped dem with their home work. Her mum was a nurse but her father still played his role. She grew up with the mentality that a man should be d one to provide for his family She got married to a man who in his own family, his dad had abandoned the home affairs to his mother. She would hustle from morning till night just so dey can eat. She paid their rent and fees. Mind u, his father was not broke oh!

Now wen they got married,She expected him to bring money for feeding...wosai!! The man don dress go work. He didn't know she was angry. And sincerely he was just being normal .He didn't know he was doing something wrong. When kids started coming nko? My friend was mad. She was dying inside. To her, he should know wat to do as a man. She stopped buying the kids pampers and food. Until he brought money.

The quarrels came
The fighting came ,
the name callings came and
the beatings came too.
His family saw her as a wicked wife.
do u blame them? mbanu

That was wen i came in. I told her if u have the money,buy it. They are ur kids too. She heard me and started buying things at home.Then came the next complain "he does not appreciate my efforts "

I had a talk with him and from our discussion, i knew where the problem was coming from....his background. He kept saying..."cant she do it? After all my mother did it since i was born till date. Wat is she doing dat i wont hear word.?" See eh, any mentality u grow up with,especially wen it was practiced by people u hold dear, e dey hard to leave u. So i told my friend to keep talking to him. let him know dat d woman is only a helper not a bread winner.

In my own house, na me dey fix bulb if e die. Cos if i dont, dat warri guy no care. Na me dey fix my door handle ,or call plumber if the taps have issues. At first, i been dey vex say which kind man no go maintain him house? We stayed in a house for 3yrs without a lock on our door cos he didnt even notice it was bad. Me too i comot face. If he wont do it, let it be like that

Until i went to warri for holidays...they were all using touch to bathe in the bathroom and there was light, when i asked, they say the bulb don die since. inukwa? Bulb of how much.?
The money to buy it was not the problem but nobody mind even go there.

Am still talking sha
Something he grew up with, e go take time to change.
If i didnt understand the problem, we for dey fight everyday

U marry man wey family no dey do any gathering .Dem no even know their papa bday. Everybody on him own.
Then u want him to always be at home,care for u ,remember ur anniversary and birthdays...u enter one chance.
Wen u start complaining,he will see u as a nag.
before u know,fight don start,e go pack leave ur house.Even with dat, e no see wetin dey wrong oh!

Its not just the men,we women too get our own.

I believe communication can solve most of the problems dat fighting will cause.

It is now in our hands to train our kids the right way.Not just our daughters oh!
Becos if u train dem well igoring the boys,ur well trained daughters will end up marrying the untrained guys.Taking us back to square one

Lets give our children the best training with sound morals so dat their generation of marriages will be sweeter than ours.

i rest my case.
#copied!

deniguy01:
What is the size of the mattress

flyca:
She throws you out of the house.
She is insecure.
She is (was) jealous (when you got your first job)
She insults you, says hurtful things to you.
She accuses you falsely (calls you a scammer even when she knows you can't scam anybody).
She raised lazy and lousy kids.
She argues endlessly.
She does not want you to establish yourself in a foreign land.
You want kids, she doesn't (I mean, she already has at least 2, and not very young anymore).

Okay, so lemme ask you. Would you tolerate a quarter of these from a Nigerian woman?

Will you marry a 35 year old Nigerian woman who is not in marriage? Either as a single-mom or a divorcee?

I hope you did not change your moniker because your past here will hunt you? Are you one of the she-males that calls spinsters “evening newspapers”?

You guys (esp here on NL) are strangely amazing!

The same guys, if given the opprtunity, will lick the assssss of a white female who is “few years apart with her being on the high side” and with kids! You just imagined escaping Nigeria to live a happily-ever life of splendor “in the abroad” without putting in a decent amount of work?

3 years of dating, why were you not researching and developing yourself in employable skills in oyibo's country. Now, money to feed oyibo's kids you want to use and read book, huh? Well done sir. Mucheche

See the characteristics of a woman that you are painting a saint, because she is oyibo and oyibo no dey do wrong for una eyes

Your eye never clear sef.
Chances are you are just getting by abroad, so you are not truly independent. You also will rather chose to be oyibos “bom-boy” than being thrown back to Nigeria. The reason you are trying really hard to make your marriage work.

Don't worry, you will be fine las las.

My life can not end now.

missjo:
Lol,i know you did not ask directly but reading it just made me remember how everyone kept asking me what it was like being caught in between the other side and this side.
I'm wishing to hear from someone too cos i could not remember sheet about my own experience,all i could remember when i came around were feelings and emotions, nothing tangible or physical.

missjo:
I do not think I'll do anything differently that i am not already doing. I have been near death before, stepped over the line and came right back after 4months in an accident induced coma.
I came back with a new attitude and a simple motto and that is nothing in life is worth losing my sleep over, absolutely nothing at all.

When u get to death's door,the only thing you're thinking about are the people you loved and those who loved you, nothing else.

izzou:
I always think of the day I'll leave this earth too

fyneboi79:
here I am baby....

techyjaygirl:
As in...I am single to stupor I just need a male friend to share my wins and losses with. I am cute, petite (please take note really petite) but smart...I would prefer a techy guy, good at programming (an added advantage ) based in Lagos. Call or whatsapp 08186954946

Toon80:
Good men still exist out here, all you need to do is to look with ur eyes wide open. am a good man but am still hustling

Succes4real:
Even when they appear, there is tendency for u to turn them down due to your mind set and preconceive notion like the story of a man in the big book that was at a particular well for 38 years, when the person with the solution appeared he was just complaining his helplessness situation.
It is well.

caringheart:
I want to know the answer myself.

Ojiniman:
Here i am

JohnDuke101:
There are lots of good men. They may not appear in a form you expect them to appear. They may be wearing oversized jackets and may not have fashion sense. They may not be saying the kind of words some ladies expect them to say when conversing with them. They may appear to be old-school to some ladies.

kay29000:
Okay. I hope it is pushed to front page too.

kay29000:
j

Yeah... Some might have other reasons. But I believe 50% of Nigerian men are on the same page with me on this.