₦airaland Forum

HumbledbYGrace: yea and another thing as far as we all know Lucan is on prison break, he has to lie low because he is a haunted man by the law. Him being superman would make him Harry Potter which is not what the whole thing is about.

I have been cracking my skull trying to analyse the whole thing, here it isn't just about picking up where the other left off.

I will stick to my chapter ten after all

Rap maestro: u no well

ijebabe: See as you've exposed urself!
This won't guarantee kitty, I haff telling you

You did a favour of not quoting my arse, next time cover your enemy well

ijebabe: You better don't threaten me abi you didn't aware who I am? Reorganise before I scatter slap give ur face

Emperortj93: follow swiftly **while shoutin 4 FOXY 2 wait for me**

**Turns round swiftly and delivers a nice kick to his balls**

Na only me dey do my hustling, oya go and drive your keke marwa

kristos: @foxy. what the hell happened to your inspiration at the male secretary thread?

flow1759: Foxy pls do me a favour, can you suggest it to Cuddlemii. Am finding it difficult. Pls do it for me. Just like Damex has suggested "barack boy". @DAMEX, Thanks

Ishilove: I've read the remaining parts of Efe's chapter. It is very obvious that Efe is a rookie in the detective genre, but for a rookie, she did one hell of a smashing job. I could sense her struggling in many parts, while she seemed hesitant in others, but at the end of the day, she delivered the goods. That's how you recognise those with real talent.
I really hope I can do as good a job as she did. Even as I type, I am mentally gnawing my fingernails.

A few points; it would have been better if you had explored the train of Lucan's thoughts as he and David up the stairs to his apartment. Then when he got to the door of the bedroom, more exploration was needed. Remember he left her sleeping and you pointed out that she looked like she was sleeping, so I think a brief description of Lucan's emotions as he advanced at the 'sleeping' Tracy would have made a more powerful ending.

'Lucan had an imminent sense of foreboding'- Scratch the 'imminent'. 'Sense of foreboding' suffices. Also, you don't have a sense of foreboding, you 'FEEL' a sense of foreboding. We have our five senses which are inbuilt in humans, it is physical, but the 'sense of foreboding' is psychological. Alien. Not like the five senses of the human body.



I sometimes wonder why I am so fussy.

flow1759: Foxy pls how do i go about it?

flow1759: na heavy prayer oh