₦airaland Forum

Hmmmm Na wa oh!

Mr..Cork:
SWEERY..Ignorance of the Law is No Excuse...OVO4U IS A RAPPPIST WHO SLEPT WIT A 15yrs olD GIRL aND as far as the law is concernd, he slept wit a Minor...OVO42 IS A RAPPPIST!!

dats not how d law works swt. He wasn't ignorant of d law but he was actually ignorant of d offence as at d tym d offence was being comitted. There was no intent or premedited thoughts 2 commit dat offence!.

toluene12: nope, i only watch simpsons and family guy
i'm old school

dats just sad. U should watch it wen ur u hav d time.

Idowuogbo: It be like say dis guy wan experience life behind bars.

Op, u stand a chance o! Sue d gal joor! Sue her for emotional damage and false declaration.Ewu morocco!

exactly! Most people dnt even understand d law. He didn't rape her, she lied 2 him abt her age in d presence of more dan 1 witness! She made him commit a criminal offence. But I dnt tink u can sue a minor under d child right Act.

Idowuogbo: It be like say dis guy wan experience life behind bars.

Op, u stand a chance o! Sue d gal joor! Sue her for emotional damage and false declaration.Ewu morocco!

exactly! Most people dnt even understand d law. He didn't rape her, she lied 2 him abt her age in d presence of more dan 1 witness! She made him commit a criminal offence. But I dnt tink u can sue a minor.

toluene12: someone is about to go to jail
you better start thinking how you wont drop your soap when they lock you away.

Lmoa. Hav u watched Boondocks?

Spartacus season 2-4 equals rubbish. No plot, no story line! All backward movement. Prefare GOT.

Very soon nobody would post anytin personal on nairaland. It would be a soul-less. Inpersonal, lifeless site all cos of sum peeps attitude!

igemi: If he is not a ghost ooo, how come he enter my house and I didn't knw, if am nt marriage, I will ask him some question if he asnwer me well and if he didn't I will send him out, if he answer me well we go start frm dere

Alleluia!

#10. The Iraqi Ambassador's Final Joke
On April 1, 2003, as thousands of American-led
coalition troops stormed across Iraq, the Iraqi
ambassador to Russia, Abbas Khalaf Kunfuth, held a
press conference in Moscow. Many were expecting
him to announce that Iraq conceded defeat. Instead
Kunfuth chose this moment to hold a gag press
conference. Holding up a piece of paper that he
identified as a news flash from Reuters, he read
aloud from it: "The Americans have accidentally fired
a nuclear missile into British forces, killing seven."
Immediately the room full of reporters went silent
with shock. Then Kunfuth grinned and shouted 'April
Fools!' Only a few days after this unexpected
moment of levity, the Iraqi government completely
collapsed.The Iraqi Ambassador's Final Joke
On April 1, 2003, as thousands of American-led
coalition troops stormed across Iraq, the Iraqi
ambassador to Russia, Abbas Khalaf Kunfuth, held a
press conference in Moscow. Many were expecting
him to announce that Iraq conceded defeat. Instead
Kunfuth chose this moment to hold a gag press
conference. Holding up a piece of paper that he
identified as a news flash from Reuters, he read
aloud from it: "The Americans have accidentally fired
a nuclear missile into British forces, killing seven."
Immediately the room full of reporters went silent
with shock. Then Kunfuth grinned and shouted 'April
Fools!' Only a few days after this unexpected
moment of levity, the Iraqi government completely
collapsed.

#9. Fake Death Report
In 1986 Israel Radio broadcast that Nabih Berri,
leader of the Shi'ite Amal movement, had been
assassinated. The news caused an immediate flare-
up of tensions in the region. However, Israeli officials
quickly denounced the report as a hoax. The false
report was traced back to an army intelligence officer
who had planted the news item in the broadcasts of
the Israeli Army's intelligence monitoring unit, from
which it had been picked up by Israel Radio.
Apparently the officer had meant it as an April Fool's
joke (because hey, nothing says funny like stirring up
tension in the Middle-East). Israel's Defence Minister,
Yitzhak Rabin, announced that the unnamed officer
would be court-martialed. "Berri Berri funny," one
foreign correspondent wryly commented.
In the category of 'really bad fake death reports' one
must also note the time in 1998 when Boston DJ's
Opie and Anthony announced that the mayor of
Boston, Tom Menino, had died in a car crash. Because
City Hall couldn't immediately reach the Mayor to
confirm that he was actually alive, many believed the
report, including members of the Mayor's family. The
next day Opie and Anthony were suspended without
pay.

#8. Revival of the Warsaw Pact
In 1996 the Russian news agency Itar-Tass reported
that the Russian parliament was debating whether to
revive the Warsaw Pact. The startling report was
immediately repeated by news agencies in the Czech
Republic and Bulgaria, causing widespread panic. A
few hours later Itar-Tass admitted that it had just
been joking, and apologized for any confusion it
might have caused.

#7. The Phony Deadline
Glenn Howlett's colleagues at London city hall
thought they had dreamed up a great gag. They sent
him a memo informing him that the really big report
he was working on was going to be due early, in just
two weeks. The tip-off was that the memo was dated
April 1st. Ha Ha. Except Howlett didn't realize it was
a joke. He received the memo while on vacation and
immediately cut his vacation short and phoned the
office to tell everyone to start getting busy. But as he
contemplated the new deadline he worked himself
up into an increasing state of panic, until soon he
began to experience heart palpitations. Finally he
collapsed from the stress and had to take leave from
work. As he was recovering he realized it just wasn't
worth risking his health to finish the report, so he
filed for early retirement. At which point someone
told him the early deadline was just a joke. He
responded by suing for damages. As a consequence
of his lawsuit, city hall banned employees from
pulling any more pranks.

#6. A Fake Hanging
Randy Wood's marriage was over, but apparently he
was still a little bitter about the divorce. So he
decided to play a prank on his ex-wife. He called her
up and asked her to come over, telling her that he
had something to show her. Obligingly she drove
over, only to find him hanging by a noose from a tree
in his front yard. Terrifed, she immediately dialed
911. Emergency services, including firefighters,
policemen, and paramedics, soon showed up. But
when they went to cut Wood down they discovered
he wasn't dead. He wasn't even hurt. He had strung
himself up as a prank to scare his ex-wife, using a
lineman's harness similar to those used by utility
crews. The authorities warned that he would face a
fine of up to $1,000 and a year in jail for his prank. A Fake Hanging
Randy Wood's marriage was over, but apparently he
was still a little bitter about the divorce. So he
decided to play a prank on his ex-wife. He called her
up and asked her to come over, telling her that he
had something to show her. Obligingly she drove
over, only to find him hanging by a noose from a tree
in his front yard. Terrifed, she immediately dialed
911. Emergency services, including firefighters,
policemen, and paramedics, soon showed up. But
when they went to cut Wood down they discovered
he wasn't dead. He wasn't even hurt. He had strung
himself up as a prank to scare his ex-wife, using a
lineman's harness similar to those used by utility
crews. The authorities warned that he would face a
fine of up to $1,000 and a year in jail for his prank.

Sowee double post. Dis isn't d real topic network palaver.

#1.Releasing The Prisoners
Imagine reading that your husband or brother who
has been held in a squalid Romanian prison for years
is finally going to be released. You make the long
journey to the prison and stand outside the prison
gates, waiting desperately for the moment you'll be
reunited with your loved one, only to hear... 'April
Fools! No one's being released!' This experience
happened to sixty people in April 2000 who read in
the Opinia newspaper that their loved ones were
going to be released from the Baia Mare prison in
Romania. They made the long journey to the prison,
only to learn that the paper had played an April
Fool's joke on them. The Opinia later published an
apology.
#2.The Dead Dog
The film National Lampoon's Vacation includes a
scene in which Chevy Chase ties a dog to the bumper
of his car, then forgets the dog is there and drives
away. Inspired by this scene, Paul Goobie tied a dead
chihuahua to the bumper of his co-worker's car. His
co-worker, Kevin Meloy, got in the car and drove off,
unaware that the chihuahua was there. Obviously
passing motorists were horrified. But what made the
situation even worse was that Meloy was deaf, so he
couldn't hear the other motorists frantically honking
at him. Happily he drove on for miles until finally
someone was able to get his attention. Police
charged Goobie with unlawful disposal of a dead
animal. The Dead Dog
The film National Lampoon's Vacation includes a
scene in which Chevy Chase ties a dog to the bumper
of his car, then forgets the dog is there and drives
away. Inspired by this scene, Paul Goobie tied a dead
chihuahua to the bumper of his co-worker's car. His
co-worker, Kevin Meloy, got in the car and drove off,
unaware that the chihuahua was there. Obviously
passing motorists were horrified. But what made the
situation even worse was that Meloy was deaf, so he
couldn't hear the other motorists frantically honking
at him. Happily he drove on for miles until finally
someone was able to get his attention. Police
charged Goobie with unlawful disposal of a dead
animal.
#3.Hijinks of Hussein and Son
Saddam Hussein and his sons may have been
ruthless, power-hungry dictators, but that didn't stop
them from trying to give the people of Iraq a good
chuckle every April Fool's Day. On April 1, 1998 the
Babil newspaper, owned by Hussein's son Uday,
informed its readers that President Clinton had
decided to lift sanctions against Iraq, only to admit
later that it was just joking. One can imagine the
knee-slapping guffaws when readers realized how
they'd been taken for a ride. The laughs continued in
1999 when Uday mischeviously announced that the
monthly food rations would be supplemented to
include bananas, Pepsi, and chocolate. Again, just a
joke. At this point, the Husseins appear to have run
out of material, because in 2000 they recycled the
sanction-lifting gag, and in 2001 trotted out the
ration-supplement crowd-pleaser one more time. The
merciless quality with which the same joke was
repeated year after year had an almost surreal
quality to it. In fact, it almost makes one sympathize
with Saudi Arabia's chief cleric, the Grand Mufti
Sheikh Abdul Aziz bin Abdullah Al al-Sheikh, who in
2001 decreed that the celebration of April Fool's Day
should be banned altogether. It's not known if the
Sheikh had his neighbor's hijinks in mind when he
issued the ban.
#4. A Fake Robbery
Sitra Walker was an employee at a clothing store in
Columbus, Ohio. She had only been working there for
two weeks, but already she felt that she knew the
manager well enough to joke around with him. So on
April 1, 2003 she called him up at his home and told
him that armed men were robbing the store. The
manager immediately called the police, who
promptly dispatched four cruisers. Minutes later
Walker phoned the manager again and screamed
'April Fools'. Too late. When the police arrived
moments later they weren't amused and charged her
with inducing a panic. Walker's manager fired her. A Fake Robbery
Sitra Walker was an employee at a clothing store in
Columbus, Ohio. She had only been working there for
two weeks, but already she felt that she knew the
manager well enough to joke around with him. So on
April 1, 2003 she called him up at his home and told
him that armed men were robbing the store. The
manager immediately called the police, who
promptly dispatched four cruisers. Minutes later
Walker phoned the manager again and screamed
'April Fools'. Too late. When the police arrived
moments later they weren't amused and charged her
with inducing a panic. Walker's manager fired her.
#5.Fake Disaster Warnings
In 1999 DJs at Oregon radio station KSJJ announced
that the Ochoco dam had burst, threatening
downstream areas with massive flooding. What made
the warning believable was that hundreds of houses
in these areas had been damaged the previous year
when the Ochoco Creek had flooded, so terrified
homeowners who heard the news quickly prepared to
flee. Later the DJs informed their listeners that it was
all a joke. They had just been 'having a little fun'. The
homeowners were not amused.
In the same genre of non-funny disaster warnings,
there's also WNOR's 1992 April 1st report in which it
warned that a large build-up of methane gas was
about to cause a fiery explosion at Mount Trashmore,
a landfill near Virginia Beach. Residents were warned
to evacuate the area, causing the local 911 to be
flooded with calls. The DJs responsible for the prank
were suspended without pay for two weeks.

#1.Releasing The Prisoners
Imagine reading that your husband or brother who
has been held in a squalid Romanian prison for years
is finally going to be released. You make the long
journey to the prison and stand outside the prison
gates, waiting desperately for the moment you'll be
reunited with your loved one, only to hear... 'April
Fools! No one's being released!' This experience
happened to sixty people in April 2000 who read in
the Opinia newspaper that their loved ones were
going to be released from the Baia Mare prison in
Romania. They made the long journey to the prison,
only to learn that the paper had played an April
Fool's joke on them. The Opinia later published an
apology.

bizzle*:
hmmm @ fruity jojo apparently u som eyecandy ..wch city u in?

lookin gud 2. Happy Easter 2 u.

Wonderful .

Cizzy99: Dis z lik d 10th gf he has had if nt more, xo wot is it abt ds .its jst matter of tym b4 he dises her off...

plsss name dem! By alphabetical order lie lie!

Is dat so ehn...

Took him 2 weeks 2 compose dis longg epistle. Nice

ozo_emeka: Noise, OMG i walked into my first connecting flight to nigeria and all of a sudden the serenity i was used to turned into loud chatter, it was a marketplace. The air hosts treated the nigerians like 2nd class citizens which they were and awfully i and some Dr on board just felt bad to be nigerians at that time

huh haven't u heard of helicopters nd private jets b4 or u tink ur 2 small 2 own one.? Nigerians second class citenzens! U must be sick in d head! >: second class ZINC lyk u

Be4 u jugde any1 make sure you are perfect.

Mr..Cork:
Am hand some and I always settle for super model look alikes (half cast babes)

thought u only go 4 White gals!

Beautful.B:
Mr. Cow leave oh...I cant be bonny pls, only God knows I dnt av flat nyansh, rather those ur white pus*sy has, I must not av a vry big nyansh,pls am ok with d way I am. Free me like terry G joor.

lmoa! Mr Cor-k is just scoping U. . Wouldn't be bothered if I were u.

Triggers
Many people with epilepsy find certain
circumstances or substances can trigger a
seizure. These triggers include:
Stress
Lack of sleep
Alcohol, particularly binge drinking
and during a hangover
Illegal drugs such as cocaine,
amphetamines, ecstasy, and any
opiate-based drugs such as heroin,
methadone or Codeine!!!.
Health conditions that cause a high
temperature (fever)
Flashing lights (this is an
uncommon trigger that affects only
5% of people with epilepsy, and is
known as photosensitive epilepsy).
Hmmmm

ILIDEFI: 2. The Walls of Benin (800-1400AD), in
present day Edo State, are the longest ancient
earthworks in the world, and probably the
largest man-made structure on earth. They
enclose 6500 square kilometers of
community lands that connected about 500
communities. At over 16000km long, it was
thought to be twice the length of the Great
Wall of China, until it was announced in 2012
(after five years of meticulous measurement
by Chinese surveyors) that the Great Wall is
about 21,000km long.


@OP; VERY BIG LIE.
To start with, these is no wall of Benin. What we have is the Benin Moat, not wall. Secondly, even if there was a wall, it could never have been 16,000km long. Do you know that the circumference of the earth is just 40,000km? Are you aware that the length of Nigeria from north to south is just 1,100km? How could a wall that surrounds only Benin city be 16,000km long. Same applies to the Great Wall of China.

It is a shame dat with all ur presumed intelligence, U DON'T KNOW d diff betwn a CIRCUMFERENCE nd PERIMETER LENGTH! Go bk 2 JSS1 so u can learn dat circumference refers just 2 outsyd of a circle nd not d surface terrain length! Not so bright after all!

ILIDEFI: 2. The Walls of Benin (800-1400AD), in
present day Edo State, are the longest ancient
earthworks in the world, and probably the
largest man-made structure on earth. They
enclose 6500 square kilometers of
community lands that connected about 500
communities. At over 16000km long, it was
thought to be twice the length of the Great
Wall of China, until it was announced in 2012
(after five years of meticulous measurement
by Chinese surveyors) that the Great Wall is
about 21,000km long.


@OP; VERY BIG LIE.
To start with, these is no wall of Benin. What we have is the Benin Moat, not wall. Secondly, even if there was a wall, it could never have been 16,000km long. Do you know that the circumference of the earth is just 40,000km? Are you aware that the length of Nigeria from north to south is just 1,100km? How could a wall that surrounds only Benin city be 16,000km long. Same applies to the Great Wall of China.

It is a shame dat with all ur presumed intelligence, U DON'T KNOW d diff betwn a CIRCUMFERENCE nd PERIMETER LENGTH! Go bk 2 JSS1 so u can learn dat circumference refers just 2 outsyd of a circle nd not d surface terrain length! Not so bright after all!