₦airaland Forum

mentorandfriend:
4). Because of prophecies and Spiritual revelations.
Don't marry a guy because he said God told him you are his wife. That is a wrong way to propose to a lady.
Let God talk to you too if He really spoke to the guy. You need a conviction of your own to enter into marriage. Marriage is a long journey, and his conviction alone is not enough to keep you together when the storms start gathering. And surely, the storms will gather. Shun every prophecy and revelation if you are not convinced, even if they are from your pastor/parish priest.

Thank you! Some of us have been victims of this. "God said you're my wife". When you enter a r/ship not out of love or understanding, because of fear of a spiritual conviction. You now start hearing silly statements from so-called spiritual guys like, "I didn't like her, she's not my taste but God said she's my wife so I had to marry her" Abegi! You love because you're willing to not because you're 'spiritually' told to! God is not a love-vendor

Is it possible you're being abused and not even know it?

Abuse is not always as obvious as being hit or shoved, called degrading names or cussed out. In fact, it can very well be underhanded or subtle.

This is the kind of abuse that often sneaks up on you as you become more entrenched in the relationship. I am talking here about psychological abuse, which is also known as mental or emotional abuse.

Psychological abuse can look like:
1.Humiliating or embarrassing you.
2.Constant put-downs.
3.Hypercriticism.
4.Refusing to communicate.
5.Ignoring or excluding you.
6.Extramarital affairs.
7.Provocative behavior with opposite sex.
8.Use of sarcasm and unpleasant tone of voice.
9.Unreasonable jealousy.
10.Extreme moodiness.
11.Mean jokes or constantly making fun of you.
12.Saying“I love you but…”
13.Saying things like“If you don’t _____, I will_____.”
14.Domination and control.
15.Withdrawal of affection.
16.Guilt trips.
17.Making everything your fault.
18.Isolating you from friends and family.
19.Using money to control.
20.Constant calling or texting when you are not with him/her.
21.Threatening to commit suicide if you leave.

It is advised that if you notice these signs, you need to take actions about it, and if you're not yet married, it's better you leave.

Source: http://www.google.com/url?q=http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2014/10/13/21-warning-signs-of-an-emotionally-abusive-relationship/&sa=U&ei=BHciVaa1EoKVsAG5wIGADQ&ved=0CBoQFjAB&usg=AFQjCNGOLs7OVdj9_IpElslIjeFEcz8KBw

In Kaduna there is Adonai Orphanage in Barnawa, opposite Danbo Intl School. There is also Shelter in Christ orphanage, ungwan biso, Sabo

Lol, this is an obsessed girl and unfortunately u fell prey to her because u're a nice guy. It's difficult to avoid them but u need to involve mature people now from ur church if not she'll do crazy things, she may go as far as wrecking any serious r/ship u get into. Try to completely ignore her, don't reply her messages or calls. A friend of mine had to deal with a crazy one bugging her boyfriend, she almost ruined their relationship.

To be holy is to live a pure life, a life that pleases God. It's not easy to do it on your own, so you need His help, that's why He gave us the Holy Spirit. Read Galatians 5:19-26. Verse 19-21 lists the things that make you unholy.

Get rid of sinful thoughts and actions, pray and commune with God everyday, the more u draw closer to God, He makes u holy. When you're close to someone, the nature and character of that person rubs on you. When you're close to God, because He's holy, He'll teach u hw to be holy. Just ask for His HolySpirit to help u. Read Hebrews 10:22

[quote
author=Dimples192 post=32132769]Nicely put...



It's dangerous when you hear husbands accusing the wives of witch craft.
Or those who set families against each other. That is evil.[/quote]so so true! Thank you

I'm not against people meeting pastors or going to prayer houses but what I'm against is how Christians become so gullible because they're desperate for answered prayers and fall victims to fake pastors/prophets.

Jesus taught us how to pray before He left the world and He also gave His word in John 14:14 that He answers prayers offered in His name. We should learn to seek God for ourselves, develop a relationship with Him and hear from Him.

My friend was desperate to enter a silly relationship because she was certain that he was her husband because a prophetess said so! I tried warning her cos the guy treats her like trash but she said he's her divine husband. The guy dated someone else eventually after ridiculing her.

While I was looking for a job, my sister out of concern, told a Pastor and he said it was because I mistakenly cursed myself and I should wake up in the night, vomit and spray a particular perfume when next I go for an interview. I was so pissed off and didn't do anything he said. I wasn't going to let anyone take advantage of my unemployed situation, afterall I'm not the only graduate job hunting. I kept praying myself and believing in God.

Please learn to seek God yourself and pray with sincere believers not jumping from one prayer mountain to the other or from one prophet to another. Some of them would just compound your problems and make you believe silly things.
All God needs to answer your prayer is your faith, obedience, patience and persistence.

Judge by the lyrics

thank you missphumby and andromida

When some people end a relationship, they sometimes go through a rebounding stage. At this time, they’re not looking for anything serious. Instead, just looking for someone to have fun with until they get over their ex. Not fair to the new person, but these steps will help you avoid getting caught up in a rebound relationship.

1. Find out how recent their last relationship was
This is a key step in determining whether or not this person is on the rebound. Steer clear of anyone who has ended a relationship within the past three months. They’re probably not ready to jump right into another relationship (even if they think they are) . Some are just looking for someone to help them deal with their recent break-up. Be careful during this time because as soon as this person realizes they’re over their ex, they just might realize that they’re over you too. You’ve served your purpose, no need for you anymore. Sad, but true!

2.Ask them!
Don’t be afraid to ask them straight out… “I know it hasn’t been long since your breakup. Do you feel like you’re at a place where you’re able to love again?” Make sure you take note of their body language while they’re responding. It will tell you a lot! This will help you establish whether this person can emotionally give you what you need in a relationship without making you suffer the cost of their last relationship.

3.Pay attention to how often they mention the ex. Even better, what does this person have to say about their ex? If they’re constantly talking about their ex (even if it’s in a bad way) , they’re still emotionally attached. It doesn’t matter if it’s a negative or positive comment about the ex. Either way, it’s bad news. If someone mentions something repeatedly, it’s because it’s weighing on their mind. It’s probably a good idea to give this person space to sort out their feelings before pursuing anything further.

4.Listen to how they talk to you. If someone is interested in you, you’ll know it. If they rarely mention anything about the the two of you as far as a future, or seems as though they’re constantly keeping their options open even though they are supposed to be in a relationship with you, then there’s a good chance, they’re rebounding. They might enjoy your company but isn’t ready for a commitment.

5.Evaluate how they treat you.If they constantly want to be intimate, even after you have made it painfully clear, NO SEX, yet they don’t want to take you out on a real date or invest quality time to really get to know you, this person is probably rebounding. Someone who is not on the rebound will want to spend time with you whenever they can because they genuinely like you and can see a future with you outside of the bed!

Source: http://theprayingwoman.com/2015/01/30/christian-dating-5-ways-to-avoid-a-rebound-relationship/

He is not. I believe him being referred to as Elijah was in his spiritual and prophetic role, not in a physical body. John 1 even answers it clearly, he was to prepare people for the Lord.

First of all, pray about it sincerely, tell God how u feel distant from Him, ask for forgiveness and help.

Start attending church, not only sundays bt weekly activities esp bible study.

Join a unit so dat there r ppl lookin out for u, it is isolated Christians dat miss out on God and make Christian friends.

You want to draw bk to God, if u didn't, u won't be bothered and post this. Your spirit wants God back, obey your spirit. pls do it now, so that it won't be a matter of 'had i known'. May God increase in you the desire and strength to do His will (Philippians2:13, Hebrews 3:13)

SkinnyDude:
yes. Happy sunday

happy sunday too!

SkinnyDude:
i have also attempted suicide twice. taking overdose sleeping tablet. God! i wont try that shi!t again!

Thank God u didn't o! what we choose to believe about ourselves is greater than the opinions of other people

ivyT:
No 6 ,avoid negative people,its just a pity dat they are everywhere

They're everywhere but you can ignore them

Dimples192:
These steps are easier said than done for someone afflicted with such condition.

It's hard but if you try, it's worth it. I went through it, was teased and felt rejected even from my own r/ship but I had to face the problem and I started seeing the good side of things. I've met people who have suffered from it so badly, someone I know even attempted suicide, but giving up or being depressed about a problem would never solve it. Pls try dear

Koolking:
I will rather, you give to your unfortunate neighbor than to he who has already in full. There is more dignity and bravery in making a change in someone who needs financial help than he who feels it's your conditional obligation. The choice is yours.

Thanks for your opinion. Someone has learnt a thing.

thank you too, we all have our opinions sha. I give to charity too, in fact that's my best way of giving cos it gives me this joy that I'm helping someone. I just hv that feeling d church needs d tithe and I pay it there and give charity separately. But anyway, I've learnt too.

Lol, nice one skinnydude

I grew up with low self esteem as a major challenge and it all started in Secondary school because I was teased a lot about my nose, small boobs and stature, lol. I thought I was over it until I started dating and it affected my relationships negatively because I was so scared I wasn't good enough and unfortunately, that negativity affected my partner not to see the good in me. I eventually faced this problem and would love to share the steps to help others, especially ladies.

1) Love yourself: you can't give what you don't have. You can't love and accept someone else when you can't love and accept yourself. Don't wait for someone to come and love you, love yourself first and that love would be contagious to people around you.

2) Identify the positive things about you: stop focusing on the negative. With time, I noticed there were beautiful things about myself I had not noticed and I started working on myself and loved myself the more. My eyes were opened to see someone who also saw the best in me and loved me for me

3) Be yourself, don't copy others: we're different and that's what makes life fun and beautiful. Not everyone can be tall, fair, busty, rich, etc. Be yourself and don't apologize for it!

4) Don't look for the flaws in yourself or other people: I noticed because I was used to identifying my flaws, I was also quick to identify other people's flaws. But when I made up my mind to focus on the best about people, I started seeing the best in myself.

5) Work on yourself: study yourself, improve on yourself, look good, be happy, let people see how smart, intelligent, joyful and beautiful you are. A low self esteem shows the worse side of you. A healthy self esteem shows the star in you.

6) Avoid negative people: don't hold on to people who are focused on ur flaws, don't be so afraid u need d emotional attachment to someone when the person doesn't love u the way u are!

7) Pray about it: trust me, it works!

You can also add yours. Be happy, you're wonderful and unique the way u are

PastorKun:
Paying tithes of money from income is also not reflected in scriptures.

Okay but that was their own kind of income in those days and ours in these days is money but anyway, when God's truth is revealed, we'll all understand things we need to. Until then, I'll keep tithing, not because I have to but because I want to.

I don't think tithing should be attached/restricted to the old covenant. Abraham wasn't under the law when he gave tithe to Melchizedek, a King and Priest of God (Genesis 14:20, Hebrews 7:1,2), since the law came through Moses. I think tithing has to do with personal conviction and a cheerful spirit. U shd pay tithe to honor God not to please a Pastor. What I don't support is Pastors preaching about tithes in ways that are not reflected in Scriptures, e.g. asking people to pay more than 10% if they want more of God's blessings

Babe try ginger, heard it can help. But try to discipline urself to sleep with ur back down and face up. Then don't eat immediately before sleeping

Another one I love
Thou whose Almighty word
Chaos and darkness heard
And took their flight!
Hear us we humbly pray
And where the Gospel-day
Sheds not its glorious ray
Let there be light!

I'm an anglican who's so in love with hymns. The words are so powerful and prayerful. This is 1 of my favorites
I heard the voice of Jesus say
Come unto me and rest
Lay down thou weary one, lay down
Thy head upon my chest
I came to Jesus as I was
Weary and worn and sad
I've found in Him a resting place
And He has made me glad!

Mine is Psalm 116:7,8
Return to your rest o my soul for the Lord has dealt bountifully with you. He has rescued my life from death, my eyes from tears and my feet from falling.

comfydan:
I wouldn't call it a rebound. He had serious intentions, wanted marriage. He still said he wants me back just that deep down I'm scared of going back.

I understand babe, but even if he had serious intentions, it's still a rebound when someone is clearly trying to use u to fill a hole left by another person. If his ex accepts him back, wld he still hv serious intentions for u? Keep to ur decision dear, u made a right one.

You're in a rebound relationship.

Sometimes we think we know it all, but the life, brain and intelligence we have was given to us, if it wasn't, man would have found a way not to die. Serving God requires faith, and faith goes far beyond intellectual logic. I may not understand all of God's ways, and I wouldn't stress myself, because God is supreme and sovereign. The story of Job has a spiritual significance and as the Bible says, the secret of the sweet companionship of God and the revelation of His deep covenant meanings are only with those who fear God (Psalm 25:14) No man can defend or accuse God, for God is ALMIGHTY and SOVEREIGN and one day, all Nations, all People will bow before Him in worship and reverence, including atheists Revelations 15:4.God be praised

Pls Kaduna is not boko haram HQ as some haters r pointin out here, thr r insecurity issues here quite alright bt this is a new and gud dev in DIC and God helping KD and North generally, peace will be restored, so pls stop hating, insultin or blabbin. God bless GEJ, God bless Kaduna, God bless Nigeria

Please is there any COZA in Kaduna, would love to attend

The devil doesn't give talents, instead he manipulates ur mind to use ur God given talents for his purpose. Look dear, if u can rap, it's ur talent, compose wonderful lyrics and worship ur God. People condemn wat they do not know! Do u know tht when Handel Messiah composed the popular 'Halleluyah Chorus' in his days, some people criticized him that it wasn't spiritual. Music changes with time! Ewi was used for gods in those days in Yoruba land, now people glorify God with it. Don't let people judge u, what matters most is that your music is a heart felt worship to God!