Ibkayee's Posts

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Romance › Re: It Is Totally Wrong To Think Someone Is Below Your Standard by ibkayee(f): 7:44pm On Jul 08, 2017*

Perspectives:
Obviously, if someone isn't willing to grow and you have tried, you definitely have to let them go cuz it means your happiness aren't tied together and it would be such a frustrating thing to be with such person. I wouldn't advise staying in that case.

When I said getting into a relationship, you know what I meant. And it's not only limited to that scenario. For a lady, a guy is asking you out and you are measuring him up, that's one case. The other part I was hammering on is when you are in a relationship and you suddenly feel he isn't up to what you really want, so you dump him, doesn't this happen? This happens with guys too.

It also happens when a poor guy you have friend zoned is trying to swim out of the zone to the boyfriend zone and you just feel he isn't up to the task.

I mentioned the person being an unambitious bum in my first comment and you didn't say anything about not advising to stay when you first responded but ok you've clarified now

Not really, 'dont feel ashamed to get into a relationship with such person just because you think the person is not up to your level' literally comes across as 'don't allow standards to stop you from getting into/starting a relationship'.

There are a variety of possible scenarios, I used that one because it's an example of a situation where the people involved have a level of control over what they're being scrutinised over, for example, an 'unattractive' person can't always control the way they look the way something like success can be controlled (made sure I said the person was unambitious to highlight their unwillingness to better themselves because I'm aware that not everyone that is unsuccessful is unambitious/can help it)

Now that you've clarified that the people involved may already be in a relationship, it depends on the situation, if the person outgrows their partner because they're lazy, leaving them is reasonable. If for example, the person is acting brand new/like they're better than their partner all of a sudden for a shallow/no valid reason, that's harsh, it all depends

If a lady doesn't want a guy because he's poor, she has the right to, it becomes an issue when she demeans him for it. Same way some guys don't want girls because they don't meet their 'spec', as long as they're respectable about it, there's nothing wrong with. It's a harsh reality but who no want better thing?

Romance › Re: It Is Totally Wrong To Think Someone Is Below Your Standard by ibkayee(f): 6:51pm On Jul 08, 2017

Perspectives:
You can build someone up to your standard. It's not enough to dump someone because they didn't meet up to your standard.

How can you have someone and then discover later that they are not up to your standard. If the standards were so important in the first place, you shouldn't get to a platonic level with them. The standard thimg is just an excuse to dump someone when you are tired of them.

In the context of the person being an unambitious bum, nothing wrong with helping out, but if the person isn't making any effort themselves to improve it isn't anyone's job to go all out and 'build' them, I think it's perfectly reasonable to dump them for not meeting your standard in such cases

Your original write-up implies that you're talking about people not in a relationship yet, you said 'dont feel ashamed to get into a relationship with such person just because you think the person is not up to your level.'. And if they were, things change and sometimes we outgrow people, if the bum isn't making any effort to improve himself/herself it isn't unreasonable to get tired of them and leave

Romance › Re: It Is Totally Wrong To Think Someone Is Below Your Standard by ibkayee(f): 6:13pm On Jul 08, 2017

Nothing wrong with expecting your partner to fit a certain standard if it's a standard you yourself represent/offer too. Sometimes you do deserve much more than the person you may have i.e. successful ambitious man/woman not wanting to be with an unambitious bum. 'Love' isn't enough

1 Like

Romance › Re: Her Action Confuses Me. by ibkayee(f): 5:04pm On Jul 08, 2017

What indicated that she may be interested in a relationship? You helped her when she was ill and she thanked you over whatsapp, doesn't sound like anything happened

Health › Re: Warning As MouthAction Spreads Untreatable Gonorrhoea Resistant To Antibiotics by ibkayee(f): 9:32am On Jul 08, 2017

GeneralOjukwu:
...come and learn from this professor....

See how he analyzed cunnilingus like PhD research

cc
nickyemezor
sweetyzinta
1bkayee

Music/Radio › Re: What Music Are You Listening To Right Now? by ibkayee(f): 8:03pm On Jul 07, 2017

Coupe | Future

Christianity Etc › Re: Man Does Acrobatics During Deliverance Session Conducted By 'Snake Pastor'.Photo by ibkayee(f): 7:55pm On Jul 07, 2017

Igbos:
What's the 'd' in your smdh?

Damn

Music/Radio › Re: What Music Are You Listening To Right Now? by ibkayee(f): 6:54pm On Jul 07, 2017

California | Wiz Khalifa

Music/Radio › Re: What Music Are You Listening To Right Now? by ibkayee(f): 6:50pm On Jul 07, 2017

Never Been | Wiz Khalifa

Romance › Re: When She Says No Sex Before Marriage, And After Marriage You Discover This by ibkayee(f): 5:45pm On Jul 07, 2017

GeneralOjukwu:

So you mean to test-drive thoroughly before buying your car?

Ma lo report fun Amadioha

Politics › Re: Disclose Buhari’s Health Status Now – Southern Christian Elders by ibkayee(f): 2:19pm On Jul 07, 2017

BroZuma:

Lai Mohammed: The president will return to the country next week in 6 months time.

Lmao who edited this picture? grin

2 Likes

Romance › Re: When She Says No Sex Before Marriage, And After Marriage You Discover This by ibkayee(f): 1:45pm On Jul 07, 2017

The no sex before marriage rule was created to protect men with small dicks sha

6 Likes 3 Shares

Romance › Re: No Man Wants A Pure Woman. True/false? by ibkayee(f): 1:18pm On Jul 07, 2017

pocohantas:
LOL! I thought same at first, but I got her message towards the end. Their anger is that she made men seem like the evil ones, and women the victims of their manipulation...

You summarised it in less vindictive way, so, you're the wife material for today

I don't want to be wife material on here biko, take it back abeg grin

Christianity Etc › Re: Man Does Acrobatics During Deliverance Session Conducted By 'Snake Pastor'.Photo by ibkayee(f): 1:04pm On Jul 07, 2017

Religion is the opium of the people smdh

3 Likes

Romance › Re: No Man Wants A Pure Woman. True/false? by ibkayee(f): 1:01pm On Jul 07, 2017

pocohantas:
Yea, you're right. I think that's the point she was trying to make...

Ahh we're on the same page, thought she meant don't do it at all, my bad grin

Romance › Re: No Man Wants A Pure Woman. True/false? by ibkayee(f): 12:02pm On Jul 07, 2017

You mean cleaning, cooking, sex, etc?

If so, it's pretty normal to do some of these things for a boyfriend, they're part of the things that set the tone for a possible marriage, it depends on the couple.

I understand the points you're making though, there's no one method when it comes to relationships unfortunately as you'll have guys who will take advantage and leave and some who appreciate it and don't, you've just got to discern the ones that are taking you for a ride which I know is easier said than done, in such cases we can only try to be sharp and hope.

Most important thing is to maintain a balance between doing some of these things as a girlfriend because you care for him and not being a doormat, devaluing/respecting yourself etc, do things for him but don't blindly play house, especially when it isn't being reciprocated.

5 Likes

Celebrities › Re: Ex-BBNaija Housemates Support Bisola At The Premiere Of "Picture Perfect" by ibkayee(f): 11:24am On Jul 07, 2017

Aww, forgot about these guys. Nice

Music/Radio › Re: Wizkid Releases Album Cover And Track List For ''sounds From The Other Side'' by ibkayee(f): 11:20am On Jul 07, 2017

A Bucie feature? Nice

Politics › Re: Our President, Buhari, Has Been Away For 60 Days! by ibkayee(f): 10:51am On Jul 07, 2017

Such an exhaustingly elusive presidency

2 Likes

Crime › Re: Reward Of N150K Offered For Driver Who Fled With Goods Worth Over N2million. PIC by ibkayee(f): 3:55pm On Jul 05, 2017

Freiden:
Em no go find am.....

150k bounty for #2M worth of goods plus cash.

Mtcheeew! Em never ready find the driver

If i fit capture the driver.....I go just collect like 500k from him and let him go.

Quote me to say I'm a bad person make thunder fall on you!!!

Lmao

Celebrities › Re: Jude Legemah: "Many Nollywood Stars Cannot Act, We Cover Them Up" by ibkayee(f): 10:19pm On Jul 04, 2017

A lot of the newer actors are painful to watch, the 'older generation' movies had poorer camera quality etc but the acting and storylines were a lot better

21 Likes 4 Shares

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