₦airaland Forum

Belurved1:
I still belief anything can happen, whether the country is governs by laws or traditions. He's not going to find it easy, as he did to his first baby mama...this is not Dele momodu. Igbo no de toy with tradition o, naa Yoruba no dey care. Baba omo to so omo ni Ifeanyi, ni bo ni o nyi si? Yoruba ronu. Yeyenatu!! Case closed.

You clearly don't know the Yorubas if you think they don't take traditions seriously. Davido would find it very easy because the law backs him up

SciLab:
You are talking nonsense. Customary laws are sacrosanct. Traditional marriage is even more sacrosanct that white wedding.


That marriage has not been properly customarily consumated and remain illegal If Chioma's father drags Davido to court, he will win.

Nigerian law doesn't say you must be married to be the rightful owner of a child. Let that sink into your skulls

Henrykeeyz19:
Good analyses but to shock you, except influenced by other factors: money, corruption, misrepresentation and/or misinterpretation of actual traditional rites, ordinarily, Igbo tradition will not compromise it's standards when it wants to decide on Davido-Chioma unmarried status, with Ifeanyi at hand– it will be so blunt–in the event actual ownership of Ifeanyi arises.

The young man adviced Davido rightly, in the light of Igbo culture and cultural rites.

Igbo culture can not hold sway in a court of law. Plus Yoruba culture doesn't agree with the Igbo culture. So which culture would prevail?

abbey621:
Read the Child's Rights Act of 2003, I know you're lazy so let me quote it for you:



DO YOU SEE ANY MENTION OF THE MOTHER'S PARENTS OR TRIBESMEN

Don't mind all these people deceiving themselves

seunmsg:
FFK the drug addict is speaking for himself. The south wants presidency and we will get it back in 2023. Southern President is not an obstacle to restructuring. In fact, the chances of restructuring Nigeria is brighter when a southerner is the president.

Southern bastards like FFK are only playing the script of Atiku and their northern paymasters. APC will take the presidency back to the south in 2023 according to the already established rotation of power and there is nothing anybody can do about it.

A northerner would be president come 2023. Mark this tweet

travelland:
I don't know why you carry this issue for head like Gala. Most people want both boys and girls in their family, especially the unlearned ones, when one of the gender is missing they will continue giving birth to more kids. An Aunt of mine has 8 boys, she lives in the village, she didn't come to nairaland to cry like this lady has done but she continued giving birth despite poverty of her husband. Did she discriminate against her existing sons? I dunno but she still didn't get a girl. Despite poverty she continued. The heart will desire what it wants and make excuses for it, abeg face your life and leave people to make their mistakes. You feel this thing deeply but na one woman matter una de discuss for days like this, just move on abeg, let her discriminate if she wants to, she will learn in future.

Lmao. I like you

victorian:
As in ehn?

That's some men for you.

They make their wives believe her natural look and looking thin is the best, so other men will not woo her.

But when they go out, they run after voluptuous ladies with heavenly make ups.

Men?

You honestly think men give a Bleep about who puts or doesn't put on make up? Lmao. The husband who has a wife that puts on heavy make up will still knack the lowly housemaid with none. Think again!

DexterousOne:
Gender discrimination is silly

Blaming the woman is even more silly

But na Naija we dey

This is what you should have said earlier. Neither a man nor a woman is to blame for the sex of a child. Anyone who blames either party doesnt have sense

DexterousOne:
Low sperm count = LessX and Y.

Y and X are almost at par with every burst
But with low sperm count.....
What do you think will be the fate of the man.

It doesn't work that way please

RisenPhoenix:
Abeg. E be like you just wan show say you know something you no know.

Go and read the linked studies I showed you and stop reasoning like a fish.

Don't mind that dude. He knows nothing

DexterousOne:
A man whose sperm count inadequate will most often have girls
Because the Y is more fragile than the X
And since X lives longer in the woman
A girl will often be thr result of that copulation.


A man plays a bigger role in the sex of the child than the woman, even tho the man and woman don't control these things


If a man don't have healthy sperm count
Forget it.

If a man has low sperm count
Even worse (no pikin)

The woman is relatively faultless in this

Anyone who told you this grossly deceived you. Ratio of X and Y chromosome sperm is almost equal with the Y slightly higher. Low sperm count results in lowered ability to get a woman pregnant, not in a lowered chance of conceiving a male child. BTW, science and medicine isn't for everyone

RisenPhoenix:
Care to cite your study? In fact, no factor has been found to affect motile sperm sex ratio which tends to be about 51% Y to 49% X in fertile men. An unhealthy man may possibly produce less motile sperm, but ostensibly of both genders, not only Y chromosomed sperm cells. Numerous studies however, have shown the effect of the vaginal environment on sperm ratio survival. Like this one:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5654200/
or this one:
https://scialert.net/fulltextmobile/?doi=tmr.2011.161.168&org=10

So your attempt to make the man responsible for the gender of the child is wildly inaccurate.

Ironically, both the youth of the mother and the frequency of sex seem to help in male sex determination of the child (which is why newly married young couples tend to have more boys). So women who only want to marry after their Phds or women who love to 'punish' their husbands by witholding sex, yet still claim to be searching for boy children should note.

This is what many don't know. And some that are medically bankrupt would be stating null hypothesis.

Czartega:
Thanks... If you know this then you should also know that the Y chromosome spermatozoa deteriorates more rapidly than the X chromosome sperm. And that the X chromosome is more capable of withstanding the unfavorable conditions in the reproductive tract. So in essence, if the man is not optimally healthy, then he cannot produce competent Y chromosomes that will make a male child

Who told you this nonsense? Science and medicine isn't for everyone abeg. Sit this one out

I really don't have a problem with my babe putting on make up, as long as she does it well and then too, she shouldn't put on make up all the time. Thank God I'm blessed with such a girl, she can go on natural look and still slay and she's a make up artist so when she puts on make up, she looks even prettier.

knowyaself2:
No, without the basis, you cant. Same way I can't love a dishonest person or a compulsive liar. And of course in marriage, I can't marry a woman that I'm not attracted to sexually.

But without any serious character flaws and other irredeemable flaws(e.g. zero sexual attraction ), love is not so hard to create in my heart. It's just a mindset, or a commitment/decision, and not some uncontrollable, irrational feelings. That's my point.

You have sense.

AutoPhone:
Considering getting a pixel 3XL 2nd hand if the price is not neck-breaking, but since Gcam is now open and other devices now have access to them. it better to focus on something else.

Best choice you for make

katyamizotta:
This is how people fail exam. Her underlying question is how to make her marriage work.
You have falsely assumed she is cheating...except you are the one she is cheating with.
You need to read again and again until you understand the passage.

Na you fail this exams o. Cos the answer to her question is simple: STOP CHEATING. If you read between the lines, you'd realize the real problem here is that she's knacking her ex or some other guy. No married woman leaving with her husband can stay 3 years without sex and not cheat, not when she has an ex she was in a 15-year relationship with. Think!

katyamizotta:
Stop being silly. She can pray to make it work first before ending it. Ending it would be the last resort.

Heaven help those who help themselves. She doesn't want that marriage to work and it's so glaring. Why waste the man's precious time? Na the man I blame sha

Zinny25:
it doesn't work for everyone... I can't respect a man I don't love, I won't even appreciate what you are doing. I won't even let you touch me. I'll feel irritated, I'll only pity you not love you. there should be love from both parties. I can't marry a man I don't love E.O.D.

The so called love will def cool off; not may. When it does, you would get a divorce

Zinny25, this clearly explains what love is and how a wise individual makes his or her marriage work

BlackPantherCri:
Well, what exactly is love to you?

Today is Sunday so let me preach. The Bible did not ask women to love their husbands. They said women, respect your husband and submit to him, men love your wife. Your husband is fulfilling his part but your inhibitions is not allowing you fulfill your path.


In every marriage the romantic feeling fizzles out. We have to work towards making it work. I've been married 11 years now, also to my friend. I was a tomboy and he was my 'egbon'. We still hail each other like friends, and believe me the friendship is the reason we are still together. We quarrel like siblings, the whole romance thing you are looking for doesn't just exist. It is a mirage, a smoke screen that covers the reality of marriage. You have to consciously make it work as soon as it fizzles out right around the first three years. In the later years, should your marriage survive the first 5 years, what you begin to have is an interdependence on each other. You have to grow into these things.

The real romance lies in making his food, doing his laundry, being at his service and tending to his needs. For him, the romance lies in providing for the family, paying school fees, the whole race of life.

If you want something different you need to MAKE IT happen. Sex is on appointment, there is nothing wrong in sending him a raunchy text message, I send mine messages like 'baba, wey you na!' (gosh I'm so horrible') and he's like 'iya, kilonshele', I reply 'come make we relate, drink ogidigida' he's like 'eh! Na you go run!', challenge accepted. We know that night, the kids will sleep early by fire by force. For baba, it is "ah, my shoulder is paining me, bring Ori come and help me rub it', shoulder fire. We know that from play it will enter dance.

Or send the kids away to a sister's place or take a weekend off, rent a hotel room and dig it out like rabbits.

Romantic dinners are a fantasy. You have to create it. All that "look into my eyes and tell me what you see" bullshit! I wear girdle and baba helps me zip it up. Life happens. Baba how do I look, instead of baba to say, oh, you look beautiful, baba will say, see this woman, you think you are 16. That's all the compliment I need.

Life has taken over. You've only been married 4/5 years. You have only just started. You need to create love, define love and make it meaningful to you. All those expectations of marriage, somebody lied. Welcome to forever

Zinny25:
Love is kind,love is patient,love keeps no record of bad done,love is understanding etc. Genuine love stands the test of time. when you genuinely love a person, you make sacrifices, you adjust your ways, just to make that person happy and so your relationship would work. Once there's no love, your relationship is headed for The rocks

Love is based on knowledge and choice. I might not be attracted to someone, but if I get married to the person and I see how wonderful a person she is, love don start be that. I then make a conscious choice to stick. It doesn't matter who I get married to. As long as she doesn't have serious character flaws, I MUST love her. That's the mentality people should have going into marriage. OP clearly doesn't want to love her husband, it's not that she doesn't love him. When she sees marriage in this light, she would stick and make her marriage a success. And she would be happy too

abutujj:
Oga which holy spirit is leading you the way you are sounding you are bitter and I will said is holy devil that is leading you.op is going through some hard time all she requested is advice not all this insult,did you really know what she is going through she has tried to make it work which she is still trying.

What is she going through? The only person going through hell is that unfortunate husband of hers. May I never be so stupid to stay put in a marriage as useless as this. May divorce come into my mind immediately my wife starts misbehaving like this woman. And may I never cross paths with her type again. Stop the petting game. She is the villain in this tale. If she wants her conscience to stop judging her, let her immediately file for divorce and end his misery

philip0906:
An adult female marries a man for reasons best known to her. How's she a victim?

Did she marry him at gunpoint? Was she underaged to make her own decision?

You're running from the obvious truth (as typical with women), the op is nothing but a witch. Tell her the damn truth and stop all this watered down talk.

The man is the ONLY victim here.

Thank you. These people like fooling themselves. She wasn't forced to marry him. She chose to. The ONLY victim is the man. She's the villain in this story

BlackPantherCri:
Well, what exactly is love to you?

Today is Sunday so let me preach. The Bible did not ask women to love their husbands. They said women, respect your husband and submit to him, men love your wife. Your husband is fulfilling his part but your inhibitions is not allowing you fulfill your path.


In every marriage the romantic feeling fizzles out. We have to work towards making it work. I've been married 11 years now, also to my friend. I was a tomboy and he was my 'egbon'. We still hail each other like friends, and believe me the friendship is the reason we are still together. We quarrel like siblings, the whole romance thing you are looking for doesn't just exist. It is a mirage, a smoke screen that covers the reality of marriage. You have to consciously make it work as soon as it fizzles out right around the first three years. In the later years, should your marriage survive the first 5 years, what you begin to have is an interdependence on each other. You have to grow into these things.

The real romance lies in making his food, doing his laundry, being at his service and tending to his needs. For him, the romance lies in providing for the family, paying school fees, the whole race of life.

If you want something different you need to MAKE IT happen. Sex is on appointment, there is nothing wrong in sending him a raunchy text message, I send mine messages like 'baba, wey you na!' (gosh I'm so horrible') and he's like 'iya, kilonshele', I reply 'come make we relate, drink ogidigida' he's like 'eh! Na you go run!', challenge accepted. We know that night, the kids will sleep early by fire by force. For baba, it is "ah, my shoulder is paining me, bring Ori come and help me rub it', shoulder fire. We know that from play it will enter dance.

Or send the kids away to a sister's place or take a weekend off, rent a hotel room and dig it out like rabbits.

Romantic dinners are a fantasy. You have to create it. All that "look into my eyes and tell me what you see" bullshit! I wear girdle and baba helps me zip it up. Life happens. Baba how do I look, instead of baba to say, oh, you look beautiful, baba will say, see this woman, you think you are 16. That's all the compliment I need.

Life has taken over. You've only been married 4/5 years. You have only just started. You need to create love, define love and make it meaningful to you. All those expectations of marriage, somebody lied. Welcome to forever

You're a woman every man would want as a wife. You understand this thing called marriage so well. You just reiterated what I've been saying all along.

pweetiedee:
Your post is so senseless!!!

His words are not entirely out of place. If she has any little concern for that husband, the right thing she should do is call for a divorce.

Sunnydays:
You needed mature advice from a married woman, well here it is: work on it! Love is a decision. Begin a romantic affair with each other. Send dirty jokes and texts to each other. Try and become more playful with each other. Make jokes, watch funny movies, share the same room, kiss in the living room. Go out together without your children. Save this response; there is a big chance that you'll come to regret it, if you continue like this. He may get fed-up with living a life without love and find someone else. You said he tries to please you. Ask him what will please him too and try. Don't expect love to just happen. Ignite an ember and fan the flames. Work on your marriage o. Work on it





[q

She clearly doesn't want to work on her marriage. That 15 year affair with her ex and probably the fact she's still collecting knacks from the said ex is fooling her. This advice won't work on her. She should stop torturing the poor husband and get a divorce. Maybe then, eye go clear am

Zinny25:
these are what you face when you marry a man you don't love or have connections with maybe as a result of pressure or age or Making do with the available option. That's why I pity Ladies who say they can marry a man they don't love as long as the man loves them.

If marriage na about love, divorce for no plenty d way e plenty now. You see, spark of love dey quench. If you aren't committed and if you don't take vows seriously, even if Una love pass Romeo and Juliet own, it will still end in tears.

row2ray:
Love isn’t enough... I was crazy in love with my wife... and believed she was crazy I love with me too... now we are working on the official divorce.. so definitely in the scheme of things in marriage, love is no enough

Love na scam

efficiencie:
@Girlwhocares, here is a story quite similar to what you are saying but here there are more details. Clearly the lady in question here never committed herself to be in a marriage and after wrecking havoc in another man's life she vanishes. I wonder how people live like this and never believe retribution is waiting somewhere in the future for them!

It's actually better she left. It's this one that's still staying put that is more annoying. If you don't want to work things out, end it