₦airaland Forum

isco10:
REDMI 6A 16GB ROM is within your budget. check jumia

That would be same thing as my current techno phone... I need fairly used with like 3gb ram..

Good day everyone.. I want to get xiaomi family and my friend has being telling me how good it it.. I want to get a good fairly used one.. but I don't have much.. I have 25k-28k.. pls anyone can help out.. thanks in anticipation...

Good day house.. am yet to use a xiaomi phone and my friend has being telling me how good it it.. I want to get a good one but I don't have much.. I have 25k-28k.. pls anyone can help out.. thanks in anticipation

OHIsIManuEL:
Which of the redmis?

any good one 4/64 configuration.. bm

maclawrence02:
I've got redmi note 5 Ai 4/64 neatly used.

For sale?

jboixxx:
Wish I could help but owner is still expecting his delivery

Thanks... I can wait...
Even if it a perfect fairly use...

Just let me know when you have

Lkj20:
open box redmi 7a 2g 16g with case & tampered glass 29k

Thanks boss... But the 7a isn't really far from the techno am using now...

I don't mind a fairly use...

Need advice on Nokia 3.2 is it a good phone

isco10:
Jumia flash sale Offer

. thanks. But how about a fairly use deal?

I need a xiaomi phone with budget below 30k... Pls any... Thanks in advance

Hi house... I need a xiaomi phone.. budget below 30k...

WHAT IS LOVE?

Over time, people have given the term LOVE various differing meanings based on their own paradigms.

Wiktionary's British English Dictionary defines love as a profound and caring affection towards someone. GoodTherapy defines love as a complex set of emotions, behaviors, and beliefs associated with strong feelings of affection, protectiveness, warmth, and respect for another person.

Just as there are many definitions (even contradictory ones), there are disagreements among people as to which definition should be considered valid and which to be rendered invalid. Due to the controversy surrounding it and yet the pleasurable nature of the subject both in terms of discourse and in practise, love has been an interesting concept/topic for poets, writers, scholars, philosophers, religious leaders, counselors, public speakers, etc.

Since no single definition has been able to encapsulate all LOVE stands for, it remains a debatable and researchable concept for many.

I have heard many, both married and unmarried postulate strongly that love isn't enough to maintain a relationship, whether among singles or couples. According to them, mutual sacrifice, commitment, patience, etc must be invested into every relationship to ensure it gains enough root to stand any test time brings.

However, I bet to differ.

The mistake most folks make is that they assume that feelings, emotions, or lust are words synonymous to love. Most believe that "feelings" or "emotions" or "infatuation" or "lust" can/should be used interchangeably with "love."

People often feel tingly sensations or 'sparks' for certain people and then call it love. When people also make statements like "there's a slim line between love and hate," they are also either referring to feelings, emotions or lust. There's a very large line between love and hatred.

While feelings, emotions, lust and infatuation can come and also leave with little or no notice, love doesn't. Love is a conscious decision. Love is a choice. It would be insane if someone walks up to you and says - "Hey! Make sure you have feelings" or "Ensure you Infatuate today" or "Don't forget to be emotional." Why? Simply because every normal individual can experience all of these without being told to. Feelings, emotions, infatuation, and the likes show up uninvited and can also disappear without notice. What these simply means is that you can't always control them in your heart.

However, Love is a choice; a decision. That's why it is totally sane to instruct people to love. You can chose to or not to. Although humans are unable to express love in its fullest form, love is a decision to befriend an individual or people unconditionally for as long as life itself exists.

Love can't be spelt out in a definition, but it can be described. Contrary to popular opinion that love fades and therefore isn't enough to maintain a relationship, LOVE ACTUALLY DOESN'T FADE and is enough to sustain any relationship.

Sacrifice and commitment are both products of love. Loyalty, understanding, maturity or any other rudiment that fosters the well-being of relationships are also products of love. There's absolutely no point striving to pull these concepts out of love . It's futile, inappropriate and inaccurate.

If a person has no love for you, you can't expect sacrifice and commitment from such a person. If a person loves you, it becomes the driving force that spurs the person to stay loyal, understanding, compassionate and affectionate, and to exhibit every other rudiment of love.

Love in itself is complete (1 Corinthians 13:1-. It is whole. It is all we need for our daily dealings with folks within and without our environment. The Bible states clearly that LOVE NEVER FAILS (1 Corinthians 13:.

Humans can fail in their frailty. Feelings, emotions, infatuation, and the likes can fail (and in fact, will fail if love is absent). Love will however never fail.

If love is unfailing, it becomes ludicrous to say it isn't enough to maintain relationships. Sadly, what many of us call love is feelings, emotions, and related tingly sensations and sparks we feel in our brains for an individual or for a group of persons. This, in all genuineness, isn't love at all.

While we can still love people we have tingly feelings for, it is pertinent to know that the tingly feelings and emotions themselves aren't love. Love can be described to be a decision to value, honour, respect, and show care, affection and compassion to an individual or individuals.

Love is a deliberate action or move to show nothing but kindness and goodness. It is a decision that takes only a single second or less to make.

It is an instruction.

Love that 'unlovable' person today!

Culled from www.transformend.com.ng.
By Fredrick A.

Well written.. this has been a contention for long

FIVE (5) THINGS PEOPLE DO THAT STEALS THEIR PEACE

It is indeed ridiculous how possible it is for us to steal our own peace through the things we do (and sometimes, the things we don't do).

Troubles and qualms have been very much present from the beginning of the world. They have lasted for a long time - for as long as the world has (even animals often have their fair share of it all).

Whether directly or insidiously, whatever happens around us tends to have undeniable effects on our hearts by influencing our moods. The sound of the alarm that wakes you up at day break, the first person who greets and perhaps compliments you, what you have for breakfast and how it tastes, the vehicle(s) by which you move to and fro, folks you meet in the process, the words you hear, the things you see, whatever comes in contact with your skin, the smells that permeate your nostrils, and many more can easily shape the condition of one's heart.

With the need to guard one's heart seemingly skyrocketing, one must indeed be deliberate about holding unto peace despite a plethora of reasons to be troubled. Below, we will be examining some solutions to lack of inner peace, while discussing some of the major things people do that leads to their loss of inner peace.


1. EXPECTING TOO MUCH FROM PEOPLE

One of the fastest ways to get yourself constantly troubled is to expect too much from everyone you come across or everyone around you.

Expectations, they say, breeds disappointment. When you anticipate only positive vibes from friends, family, colleagues, etc, you are bound to have your feelings and emotions crushed on a wall of unpredictable flaws.

All people are full of flaws. Your children are likely to provoke you (they can be rebellious sometimes). Your wife could put up incessant drama at some point. Your husband won't always be the best man in the world. Your parents might just have a way of always pissing you off. Your boss just might be a haughty person. Your employee(s) might be dishonest and mischievous.

The list goes on and on and on! People are full of flaws and it could all get in the way of things almost all the time. This is one truth we must come to terms with. We must become conscious of the imperfections of others, hence giving room for offenses. When you expect too much from folks around you, it would definitely get your heart shattered. When you give room for offenses, it becomes easier to let go of the excesses of others around you.

Hope for the best, but expect any thing! This is a sure way to inner rest.

2. DWELLING ON THE OPINION OF OTHERS ABOUT YOU.

Ehm... This one is quite tricky in a way. It's not altogether bad to consider the opinion of others about you and to think of it. However, it must not evoke the 'worrier' in you.

People are going to have a huge number of varying opinions about you (people you know, people you don't know, people that know you, and people that don't know you). Yes! It's that terrible (exactly why worrying about it can make you to 'comman goan kill yaself'). People would frame just any view of you they want, and guess what? They are free to!

You can't stop anyone from framing their own view of you, using just any impression they get or choose to get of you. Some might choose to see you as ludicrous. Some might see you as a murderer (smiles). Others might conclude you are unnecessarily sassy or ill-behaved.

The good news is this; It matters little what the opinion of others is about you. What matters is who you really are. As a result, there's need for you to work on your flaws and deficiencies BUT there's absolutely no point getting distracted by worrying over what others are saying or thinking about you.

3. WORRYING OVER THE PAST

The past is exactly what it is - THE PAST. It can't be revoked or annulled. At best, one can only wish it could be changed. Unfortunately (or may be fortunately), the past can never be altered. Whatever has been done has been done already.

The past can be likened to a reflection on the surface of a still mirror or stream. You seem to be seeing the object that is being reflected on the mirror or water, but it's actually not there. It's right there, but it's not there. You can see it, but you aren't actually seeing it. It's only a reflection! It's real, but some how, it's not!

The past is gone and can't be changed! This is one truth we must not casually deal with. We must with all firmness and wit embrace it. It's a major pathway to peace. We must bear the consciousness that whatever has happened already can't be altered by anything, not even by worrying. If we don't move on, such worries would only trap us in depression by stealing our peace.

The ironic thing about worrying over the past is that most times, these events of the past have helped our growth and self development, perhaps without us noticing.

Every thing that has happened with/to us is inexorably a blessing received or a lesson learnt.

4. HAVING FEAR OF THE FUTURE.

It is to a large degree true to say that the future is unknown or uncertain. However, our present must only be spent shaping the future instead of worrying over it.

Worrying over the future is an unfertile land of 'what ifs.' "What if I lose the job?" "What if these health challenges keep on coming?" "What if I am unable to raise enough funds for my needs?" "What if the bills swallow me up?" "What if my family and friends give up on me?" "What if I end up failing?" "What if I don't measure up?"...

The truth about all the 'what ifs' in the world is that they change nothing and help no one at all. Pitching your mind on thoughts of the uncertain future or of prospective doom has been a hugely unprofitable venture from the beginning of time and would remain so for sure.

In place of cowering over possible pending mishap, it is a million times more gainful to maximise your opportunities and resources by investing your time, efforts and thoughts into structuring your present. This way, you would have a future too illuminated for you to fear failure.

5. TRYING TO KNOW TOO MUCH

This one is quite similar to the second point treated in this article (but completely different). Some folks, perhaps out of insecurity or habitual suspicion are veterans in monitoring others.

While it is completely safe to study and learn as much as you can, it is utterly inimical to your peace for you to begin to pry into other people's lives and activities in order to find out what they could be hiding from you (even 'common sense' should teach you to respect people's privacy).

Some people want to know just everything that is being kept from them (and this has proved to be the undoing of many). They want to go through people's texts (this can get you killed especially if they are your spouse (smiles)), monitor their movements, eavesdrop on their conversations, etc in attempts to find out whether or not they are saying something to others that they don't want them to be aware of.

Such acts are grossly unhealthy. It ruins relationships (and your own peace first. You might get to know something and end up wishing you never did). For the sake of your own sanity, it's best to keep off people's private life (including that of your individual family members. Even your wards).

Stop striving to know more than people permit you to know about them and their activities. Choose to build your relationships on trust (for the sake of your own peace and rest), not on suspicion of everyone and thing around you.

You must be deliberate about guarding your heart by determining what gets in and what gets out. No one is going to take the blame on your behalf if you fail at any point. It's your sole responsibility to hold unto your peace and inner rest.

Be serious with it.
By Fredrick A.
Culled from www.transformend.com.ng

The easiest way to be a misfit....

*The price of inconsistency*

Transformend was conceived from a discussion with my bro. So I decided to throw my weight to it and to writing, I envisioned it as a platform to express my passion, hubby and also capture the ends meet part of life.
I bounced the idea to a couple of friends whose work and potential I admire. They bought into the Transformend dream and helped to shape the introduction to the world. In no time it kicked off and all was smooth sailing. I was living the vision or at least I thought I was.

In a short while I got starved of content, I thought I wasn't getting it right so I made up excuses and tagged it rebranding..lol so funny now but that was the best I could come up with.
I got more writers which meant more content and more content meant consistency or so I thought. The best team anyone could assemble, but despite the additional hands content still ground to a halt, what could be the matter? this time I pegged it on personal weakness.

From my personal experience and what I have learnt from people over time I can tell just well, the subject of consistency one to be treated with utmost reverence. A friend once dropped what i call 'Rhema', “the world is watching your consistency” indeed the world is sure watching you and whether you like it or not; it's preparing a score card that will be a summary of you.

The world is Dynamic, change is constant, trends are ever evolving, the moment you give chance for a series of inconsistencies you gradually loose your cutting edge and with time if you don’t work at it you become irrelevant and your abilities becomes obsolete.

Inconsistency stagnates your creativity.
Inconsistency is like pressing the pause button your growth and advancement.
Inconsistency is like running a single mile in a marathon and then stopping to take a nap
But wait you may want to give reasons for inconsistency; no man ever made a difference by giving excuses. The table only turns when you take responsibility.
What then could be the possible reason or drivers or factors for inconsistency?.

The first is the fear of Failure
Whether it’s inherent fear of failure or a fear brought about by a plague of past failures, fear of failing has driven many into inconsistency. Failure is what you make out of it. Some carry it on their head while others lay it down as steps on the way to success.

The next is weakness
I have come to believe that we are all created with a weakness within us so as not to forget the God factor and our fellow humans . However, sometimes these weakness becomes kinda overwhelming for the average people. Consistent people are person's who have learnt to work it out.. you too can learn.

And Fear
Antlophobia is the fear of not being good enough. This fear takes different forms to different people; oddly it may take the form of humility, while striving to be humble people get stuck in their comfort zone.

Truth is, you might have the best reason for inconsistency, but the world is Dynamic, new discoveries are being made, new knowledge is being accumulated and existing once are updated on constant basis which means that your current knowledge needs to be frequently updated also.

I know it’s not easy, but you need to get a grip of your strengths, bottle up every reason or factors that can drive you into inconsistency. Learn to utilize failures as stepping stones, grow your strengths until your weaknesses become negligible and if it’s seems not to leave then decide to keep doing the needful regardless of how you feel.
You are sent here for a reason, you have a message to share and an impact to make; at the end of its either you enjoy the value of consistency or you pay the price of inconsistency. Only you can choose where you want to end up.. which do you choose?

By joessiglow.
Culled from www.transformend.com.ng

Culled from transformend.com.ng

Do you still believe in love.. A piece for the season.. Enjoy the read

"So..the last person who'd be talking to us this evening during this special valetine edition is Miss Stephanie a final year student from the University of Lagos! A round of applause for her as she mounts the platform".

Everyone stood up to applaud as a slim dark lady mounted the podium. She kept smiling till she got to the pulpit. There was something about her smile,it made me remember the good old days when I flashed my teeth and brightened my eye at the slightest tone of humour but what's left? The last few months had been filled with tales of woes.

Let's just forget me and focus on this last speaker. I was happy she would be the last and I'd find my way home. I never wanted to come, Rachel practically coerced me and what an unappealing event it had been. Oh well,I'd have just stayed home crying. It would have been better.

"Hallelujah!"

Her voice jolted me back from reverie. She was in full possession of the PAS now.

"You know,when I was invited for this program as a speaker,I kept wondering what I was going to tell you all. I mean,its all about love and even if you're here heartbroken,you must have loved. I haven't been in a romantic relationship before so I might not be able to give you a filial or sensual definition to love but I have tasted the divine and yes! That's what I'm standing here to talk about"

She paused for a little while admist the mixed reactions from the crowd then she continued...

"You know there is only one person who tells you he loves you and mean it? You know he's the one who can say ANYTIME and ALWAYS without mincing words? You know he's the one who's gonna be there for you when every other person gets tired of you and abandons you? Oh! You always thought you'd be the only one there for you?"

She laughed. I looked straight into her eyes with undivided attention. She definitely didn't know what she was saying. Many times I've been left alone to cry my eyes out. I was tired of calling on anybody to help. I didn't even believe anybody out there existed who was interested in me. Wait! Was she going to end up saying God? Nonsense! All these ones who have never experienced anything in life would just walk out of nowhere and start marketing God.

".....Yes! I was going to end it all by telling you the person I'm talking about is God! He's the divine I tasted. I don't know how you feel. I have never been in your shoes. You'd never want to wear mine either. It doesn't change the fact that you can't overrule the existence of the divine".

So that was it! All those words she was miming.

"I lost my parents after I gained admission into the university. I didn't see it coming as they were the only source of livelihood I had. I had to move in with my aunty who was doing a lot of odd jobs to survive too and here she was bailing it on God. As if that wasn't enough I had to do some side hustle just to get the basics of living for my self, as I didn't want to fall prey to the guys who offered help with a hidden code of nothing goes for nothing.

"Yes! It's God's love," she reechoed. She went on to explain her story and experiences of others she knows that brought her to the conclusion of the love of God. This left me wondering, my experience had only made me write off the possibility of God being interested in the minute details of my life.

I couldn't get my eyes off her. Even after the program, my butt was stuck to the seat while i battled with what I just heard and how it applied to me. I'm not going home yet; at least not this way. So, I made my way towards Miss Stephanie. With a blazing smile, she extended her hand for an handshake and asked me to walk with her.

She paid attention to every thing I had to say and when I was done talking and lamenting she asked me a question, do you believe in love? Before now, I could easily bounce off an answer to this question in style, but I was humbled this time as she made me understood the divine nature of love. The last few months had been filled with tales of woes but the love she shared made me whole. Tears like a river flowed from my eyes. I felt washed, whole, new. I felt joy and I felt love.

What about you? Do you believe in love? What has stopped you from experiencing love? God sent his only son to die for our sins. What purer love is there than this? It's okay to let go of all that weight; sin, guilt, regret, hatred, anger, shame. It's okay to accept his forgiveness and embrace his love. It's real and genuine. The best love you can experience.

What do have to say about love?

Culled from transformend.com.ng
By ifeoluwa

"We're all sinners"

He said as he laughed in a puff of smoke. He took a long drag at his cigarette and the smoke that followed was the equal and opposite reaction for his drag action.

I tied my handkerchief around my nose and prayed the bus driver would move faster than the speed of light before this unbothered smoker would expel oxygen out of the bus completely.

Turning to my left, i realised i was seated close to a window. Sweet relief swept over me as i opened it and put my head out.

"We're all sinners!"

He was so loud this time i wondered if he was talking to someone in particular

"We're not all sinners"

Everyone turned almost simultaneously to the direction that was coming from. There he was. He was dark. He appeared tall. He also had broad shoulders like someone on a gym diet. I wanted meeting his eyes but he had a pair of dark shades on.

Then, he smiled "i just said we're not all sinners. Grace has saved some".

The smoker let out a wry smile. "I knew you were seated there the whole time. I was trying to get your attention". He took a drag again and let out a whole lot.

The one in dark shades smiled. This time he removed his shades before he spoke. "You got every other person's attention too you know. It took me a while before i could recognise you".

The smoker nodded and looked down like he was searching for something then raised his head. "I expected that. You know, I've always wondered from then till date. What changed man?"

The other guy appeared serious now. Like he was going to make a i-swear-to-god statement. "Grace changed. I've always told you back then till i left. Grace justified me. It bridged a gap between me and sin. We're not all sinners, grace has found some". He ended his statement looking triumphant like he just won a Nobel prize never heard of in history.

"Grace is a Nobel prize itself". I thought as I smiled.

When next the bus stopped at an intersection, the grace man came down, waved bye to his friend as they shook hands. He walked off with a bag slung across his shoulders with is fitting pair of shades.

"He does look justified" the smoker said looking on as the bus zoomed off.
Are you justified?
By kipp's
Culled from www.transformend.com.ng

funmisticqueen:
blah blah blah ego trip alert. All you exude is Fake confidence hiding real helplessness

Hmm

Let's look at it critical and you will see a light.. I know of family where women are the sole provider and yet the family flourish.. My take is marriage is a Union who ever have should spend without remorse..

Nice analysis bro

ZIMDRILL:
What is family? i think thats were the confusing starts
Usually before kids arrive, reference to the wife is WIFE but the moment a child is born, reference to wife is interchangeable with word family eg instead of saying i got a wife and child, you say i got family

Back to the the question who is responsible to look after the family? its both of you

From bible point of view adam and eve started to hunt and gather after the curse right meaning adam did the hunting while eve did gathering of fruits veg etc so they provided for each other

Then came civilasation were people stared to live in groups and permanent place, man looked after domesticated animals while women had small garden And both provided for family

Then finally came industrialization, no more freeland to hunt and gather good land belonged to someone rich, now work for the owner mostly manual labour which suited men, therefore the little the women provided is gone, she just look after the kids, while hubby brings in money from work and men then took advantage of new way of life by saying" i will take care of you," and this the same period women had no rights to own land, vote or inherit property even education

Now things have changed women work and provide financially but they want men to 100% responsible at the same time some feel to be responsible 100% but there is catch to it eg divorce traditionally the wife walk away with nothing as he man was the sole provider

Now the challenge with most female providers they think men was always the sole provider but history through bible or civilisation dont agree

Men and wife provide for each other
So is men, wife and children

Elder0001:
You lack wisdom.

Bro take it easy.. All opinion are welcomed

JoannaSedley:
What da hell
If you are discussing scriptures then go over to the religious section.
The question is clear and all inputs are welcomed.

True

Hmm. No one gain by twisting the scriptures.. But wat I see there is drive to balance and understanding in relationship and marriage

Its a flash back Friday something. I remember the days of tales by moon light.. Enjoy the piece

Tell me a story
A story of tomorrow
A story of hope
Filled with light
With me standing in the spot light
A story of how
How I made it.

Don’t tell me about yesterday
Cos yesterday is history
Filled with story of regret
Regret mix with experience....

What about today
Today has us enveloped
With hustle and strive
Bustling to make a differences
So we will make the day count

Tell me a story
Not a story of yesterday
For yesterday was super story and tales
Tales by moon light
Tell me a story
But not of today
For today is already now

Tell me a story of tomorrow
A story of hope and smiles
A story of love and peace
A story of how we made it
A story of hope.

~joessiglow~

Read more on https://transformend.com.ng

If you are not indomie generation, share your own tales by moon light.

Well said bro.

mogbojaiye:
Am going to make this logic as simple as possible.

Things have changed over the years,marriage of 1996 is not the same again as now. The truth is no matter how wealthy a man is no man wants to marry a liability, the economic of 1996 is different from the current economy worldwide,.

A woman that gets married to a man with the sole aim of the man providing everything thing for her even close to buying her pad for her will not only loss her respect but also her value in the house. Her daughters will also end up losing their value and will eventually resort to hitting up on guys for survival or men for survival which brings prostitution to the table, that's why you see some ladies whose means of lively hood is opening their legs just to eat indomine and egg in university because when u just take a walk to her hux u will eventually find her own mother doing nothing at home.

Then when you take a walk with the boys at home, their brain have been wired that you must give to a woman when ever she ask for financial assistance, ,,thats where some turn out to b mumu (after all I did for her, she still left me) untill day wise up,
They too wil now understand that a lady can also feed for herself without support

Now let's take it to a house where both parents are supportive to one another, the children will also inherit such attitude and will also attract their type and when they jam d opposite they call them (self-centered) or stingy


You attract what you are, starting from your upbringing,

I was brought up with my father doing all d expenses and all the dropings so I don't expect the woman I will marry to add a penny to me, me kw send cus am a hustler till I die,

But note :no man wants a LIABILITY

What I see is a more shared responsibility. First as a guy you don't marry because if children or upgraded house help to cook and clean u up. Ladies too u don't marry cos you want to transfer ur burden to another while u are not handicap.

asuustrike1:
I must say your are brilliant. Your explanations are clear, you analysis are good. Your write up is unbiased without sentiment. If many heed to this cases of divorce and break up in marriages and relationship will reduce.

Very true

So because someone is dating you.. You will now turn ninja budget for somebody abi

Lol

Tallesty1:
The person that eats too much.

.
��

I think is more like a deep sense of understanding between the two party involved.. What ever conclusion they reach in taking care and running their family.

[sup][/sup]

Richhard:
lalasticlala dominuque seun myn44

English pls