₦airaland Forum

Hi Fem,


The link is right above your first posting on this thread.  BigBashiru's posting, it is.

Yeah, passing the SAP BASIS Consultancy exams would qualify you as such.  You'll most likely get your first role as a Junior SAP Consultant.  You need to graft really hard for it.  It would be really worth your while, take it from me.

All the best.



kiwi992.

Hi All,



Markos

Don't worry about it 'cos I don't think there's anything racist in saying what the Indians are like.  I just wish our fellow-Nigerians would help each other in exactly the same manner.

One thing I don't get is why anybody would give employment to Indians in Nigeria, considering that many of our graduates and professionals are unemployed.  Moreover, they (the Indians) would never, ever give work to any non-Indian in their own country.  So, why give them work in Nigeria anyway? 

Pakistanis are so much better 'cos at least, they would never hate you on account of the colour of your skin, being that they are Muslims, unlike the Hindus whose religion is based on the caste system, such that the darker the colour of your skin, the lower down the ladder you are.  Buggers!  Nigerian jobs for Nigerians that's what I say.

Given half the chance, the Asians (Indians, Pakistanis and Bangladeshis) would take over the country before you know it, 'cos that's what they are like.  Come and settle in one's country and then populate it with their own people using all the tricks in the book to bring their people over from India and Pakistan.  A take over, more like!  The worst part being that they'd never integrate into the society, thus, leading to resentment by the host community, as well as racial problems.

In some parts of the South Pacific, Indians are not even allowed to own land 'cos they know that would be an open invitation for them to take over the country.


Nna

Good to know that you guys are networking behind the scenes. 

Sad to hear about the constant power outage in Nigeria.  An absolute disgrace, if you ask me, especially in this day and age.  Maybe you should consider buying a very small power generator for yourself.

Whatever you guys do, ensure the Indians do not get a foot-hold on the SAP market in Nigeria 'cos that would spell bad news, considering that we Nigerians are far more intelligent and better educated than they are.

All the best to you in your endeavours.



kiwi992.

Hi All,


Markos is absolutely right - a true Nigerian that loves his own people and willing to help others, unlike some selfish buggers that I know of who are but only full of ignorance and their own perceived self-importance, considering that they know sod all!  Yes, sod all, if you ask me. 

People seem to forget one thing - that, selfishness gets no-one anywhere.  I believe in the laws of Karma - you help others and help would always come to you when you need it most.  The guy or gal you are helping says 'thanks' and that's more than enough for me.  That same guy or gal helps others with the same magnanimous spirit.

Being a school kid in the UK back in 1975, I was desperately short of cash 'cos the money my dad sent to me from Nigeria hadn't yet arrived.  I couldn't work either as I wasn't old enough to do so.  I then went to the Nigeria High Commission in London to see what they could do for me by way of a loan, to be re-paid when my money arrived.  Unfortunately, they couldn't help me, except some kind-hearted Yoruba gentleman by the name of MR IDOWU.  You know what?  This gentleman didn't know me from Adam, we don't even speak the same language or belong to the same tribal grouping (something that's important to those bloody tribalists) as I'm a Kalabari, yet he put his hand in his pocket, pulled out a five pound (£5) note and gave it to me!  Why? - because we are NIGERIANS pure and simple, hence he helped me out.  That £5 meant the world to me - like £5m!  I couldn't thank him enough.  I'm sure he's long dead by now but may his soul rest in perfect peace, Amen.   

It really saddens me to know that the Indians are beginning to take over the SAP market in Nigeria.  How so bloody typical of them!  One thing I know for sure is that they (the Indians) will NEVER, ever, let you have the chance of a job in their own country, let alone, be employed as an SAP Consultant.  Not a chance in this world!

I know them so, so well - had an Indian female friend for something like eleven years.  I could have married her but backed out 'cos I couldn't deal with the way the Hindus feel about black people.  I've been to their country and know their mentality so well.  You let one into your country and they'd use all the tricks in the book to bring over a battalion of them from India.  Ever wondered as to why Idi Amin kicked them out of Uganda?  They would never mix with anybody except their fellow-Indians (Pakistanis are much better 'cos of their religion).  They - the Indians would call you 'kala' (black), in a derogatory manner, yet they face the most racism in the UK as compared with black people.  They'd be laughing and playing with you whilst filling up all those top positions in Nigeria with their friends with fake Indian university degrees.  How could you ever allow this to happen in our country?  How? - in our country with its employment problems!

I feel so sad to notice that a lot of our fellow-Nigerians here are simply NOT SERIOUS about obtaining this great certification.  This thread has, to my mind, become a talking shop as well as a vehicle for obtaining links to a wealth of SAP material, without people being actually interested in conducting a serious course of study to become certified as SAP Consultants.  I've yet to see somebody coming here to tell us that they'd got certified as an SAP Consultant.

If you guys think that you would get your foot in the SAP R/3 doorway without certification, then you don't know what's awaiting you.  Don't even waste your time thinking you'd get a job as an SAP Consultant.

Markos got in when SAP was very much new in this world, so, he did not need certification because he happened to have had some experience using the product - a new global erp product that very few people knew anything about, at that time.  Needless to say, he has, over the years, acquired lots and lots of experience with SAP R/3.  He is what we call a Senior SAP Consultant and those are the people at the forefront of SAP.  People like him don't need certification, believe me because experience with the product is, afterall, what matters the most. 

However, for new entrants into the SAP market, certification is a MUST!  Yes, a must!  Don't even think you'd get anywhere without certification.  Okay?  Either be serious about your certification studies or you might as well give up and let those bloody, greedy Indians kick your arses in your own country, controlling the SAP market.

Look, here's the real deal for you, my fellow-Nigerians.  You either become a:

1.  thieving Nigerian politician or
2.  an SAP Certified Consultant

Take your pick!



kiwi992.

NB:
C1 - thanks for asking.  Weather's been good, so I've had some really good flying time.  Would be stripping down and de-coking my aircraft engine this week-end if the weather is good.

Aboyman - thanks for your kind words.

Hi All,


I do believe what Omo Yoruba is telling us. 

Personally, I can't see as to why he would come here to lie to people.  You know what I mean?  It just wouldn't make any sense, would it?  I believe the guy.  Strange things can and indeed, do happen.  He saw it with his own eyes, hence he's merely narrating it.

Please, fellow-Nigerians, do NOT call someone a liar even if you don't believe the one's story.  Not everyone out there lies.  I really find it most offensive when people do that in this Forum.

If you are sceptical about the story, then, simply say that it is very hard to believe it, but that it doesn't mean you're implying that the one is lying.



kiwi992.

Hi All,



Briz

Good to hear you attended it. Hope you made the most of it and indeed, networked as adviced.

Mikky

You know the protocol. Just speak your native Nigerian language here, as well as broken English and your request would be honoured.



kiwi992.

Hey Piss Head,


Another new word for you - retard.  Just keep learning new words from me.  Bloody illiterate.  There are more - just scroll up.  Your vocab would be vastly increased by the time I'd finished teaching you English.

Venture out to the SAP, Piloting and Networking threads and prove yourself to all of us. I've already done so. Never mind the stupid politics and religion that you are always posting on.   

Once a fool, always a fool.



kiwi992.

Hey Scorp,



Thanks man.  I won't die up there.

Actually, I've been pre-occupied in a religious battle over at the FreeMason's thread with some knuckle heads.

Hope your conference goes alright tomorrow.  You guys must ensure you make the most of it by networking.  This is crucially important.  THIS IS YOUR CHANCE!!

Go with your CV, make contacts.  In short, do whatever it takes to get to know people there.  Try and go with business cards (you can design one on the computer and get them printed).  Let them know about your SAP certification training, your skills, relevant qualification (including the exam you recently passed), and so on. 

It's your biggest chance to get into SAP.  Indeed, let this be a platform for you guys to spring forward.  Talk to the representatives of the companies that have implemented SAP in their organisation.  Ask for their names, positions in their organisations, as well as their business cards.  Ask to meet them.

Nigerians must NOT allow the Indians to dominate the SAP market in Nigeria 'cos we are ten times more intelligent than they are.  Indians will never give jobs to you if you were in their country.  Never!  Why let them take over the lucrative SAP jobs in Nigeria?  I bet you would see lots of them in the conference tomorrow.      

Remember, all you want is a breakthrough into SAP in Nigeria and this shouldn't be very difficult 'cos it's relatively new in our country and has a very long way to mature, let alone peak.     

Oh yeah, try and get to meet the other guys from this Forum as well and exchange details with each other.

Lastly, PLEASE don't go back home regretting that you forgot to do something at the conference.  SAP is fresh in Nigeria and people like you would be the big boys of tomorrow.  Make the most of this opportunity at the conference.

All the best to you guys.




kiwi992.

NB

SAP Business One is a stripped-down version of SAP R/3.  It is predominately aimed at the SME's (small-to-medium-sized enterprises).  It appears that SAP is trying to push that product in Nigeria.  Those of you from a business background should keep an eye on it.

Hey Pork Face,


I couldn't be bothered with your shenanigans anymore.  At least, not in your drunken stupor!

I have respect for the true and decent FreeMasons in this Forum and elsewhere.  I certainly wouldn't be the one to dig up the dirt on any secret society, for my better judgement.     

My advice to you:  embrace Allah or God.



kiwi992.

Hey You Plonker,


I guess you've learnt a new word from me - nitwit.  There are a lot more for you to learn from me in this thread.  Shameless buffoon.  Just scroll up and you'll learn more.

Oh yeah, you still haven't told me which member of your family you've sacrificed for money.  Your daughter, son, wife or who?

Did you go to the Lodge last night?  What did you do there?  Pray to Harem?   



kiwi992.

Hey You Two Imbecilic Fools,

Nignog:
https://img188.imageshack.us/img188/9481/imagefiv.jpg

The above Church signpost says it all.  Thanks to NigNog.

Never mind the New Order, The Craft, The Brotherhood or whatever you may call it.  You need to seek salvation from Allah or God, for all your sins, for He is the supreme, the protector of all.

Desist from worshipping satan and read the Bible or

Quo'ran:

Ayat Al Kursi - The Verse of the Throne
Sura 2: Verse 255

"In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
Allah! There is no god but He, The Living, The Self-Subsisting, Eternal.
No slumber can seize Him nor Sleep.
His are all things in the heavens and on earth.
Who is there can intercede in His presence except as He permitteth?
He knoweth what (appeareth to His creatures as) before or after or behind them.
Nor shall they compass aught of His knowledge except as He willeth.
His throne doth extend over the heavens and on earth,
and He feeleth no fatigue in guarding and preserving them, for He is the Most High.  The Supreme (in glory)".   

The above is the most powerful verse in the Quo'ran.  It gives you ALL the protection that you need.

I rest my case.



kiwi992.

NigNog,


Leave it man, chaa!

I don't have the time to play with you right now.  I've got an axe to grind with those two buggers.

Anyway, there's a word called insultive in English.  Go here:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=insultive




kiwi992.

Hey You Two Smack Heads,


Don't push me, okay?

Don't, 'cos you ain't gonna like what I'll post here.  As I said, shut the fxxk up and scram else you'd be exposed.  You wouldn't like to hear the bitter truth about your fraternity or would 'ya?

Still in denial are we?  Well, you wait for it and refuse to listen to me.  You've been warned to shush and never dispute what I say.  Okay?  

Oh yeah, and before you start running scared, remember, you can run but you can not hide from me.  Uncivilised thieving corrupt lot that are only members of the Brotherhood for their own selfish material gain.

Which of your family members have you picked out to sacrifice for money?  Son, daughter, brother or who?

I'm still waiting for you crack heads to apologise to me.  Now do it or else I'll kick your arses.




kiwi992.

NB
My apologies to the decent FreeMasons in this Forum.  These two buggers asked for it and I'd soon come down on them like a ton of bricks.

Hey You Two Nitwits,


Talking about the brouhaha concening the Freemasons on TV, how about this BBC Newsnight program hosted by Jeremy Vine, back in 2001:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/events/newsnight/1238656.stm

How dare you dispute what I tell you eh?  How bloody dare?

Why don't you do a friggin search on this Forum and get an idea of me.  All you guys ever post about are nothing but stupid and controversial subjects like religion and politics.   

Now apologise to me and shut your gob or else more would be coming your way.  You wanna fight, I'll give you a damn good fight.  See who can be more insultive - you two looneys with your archaic Shakespearan English expression or I.

You two MUST get ready for a drawn-out fight and we shall see who's the fighter.  I'll prove to you that I can just be as nasty as you two plonkers.  This would teach you never to start a fight with anybody in this Forum or elswhere, next time.    

You better come back 'cos I've not finished with you yet.  Remember, you asked for it.




kiwi992.

NB: 
My apologies to the decent Freemasons in this Forum.  I didn't want to bring up all this.  These two knuckle heads asked for it.

Hey You Two Retards,


Here's a link to a video that specifically mentions the existence of Provincial Grand Lodges in the UK.  Oh yeah, with Grand Masters as well, unlike what you two morons think.

You better clean your wax-filled ears and listen carefully 'cos I don't think you'd understand what the gentleman is saying, otherwise.

Here goes:

http://www.kenttv.com/programmes.php?PID=304

How dare you attack me when, all I was recalling was what was mentioned to me.  Now, the evidence is staring you right in your ugly faces.  What are you going to do about it?  Dispute it?   

You wanna pick a fight with me, I'll give you a good fight until you curl your tails in-between your crooked drumstick legs and apologise for calling me a liar. 

More on its way.  Remember, you asked for it.  



kiwi992.

Bastage,



Have you ever heard of PROVINCIAL GRAND LODGES? 

In case you didn't know, there are lots of them scattered all over the UK.  Those are Grand Lodges too, each with its own Grand Master.  You fool!   

You lot are harping on about just one Grand Lodge in England as well as one in Scotland.  Go and search for Provincial Grand Lodges.  I'm sure you'll find them all over the place.  You need to research the information before coming here to doubt me or calling me a liar. 

How dare you doubt what I say?  Who gave you the audacity?  Are you two retards or what?  

Bastard, more like!  Supposed to be a Free Mason and he can not remain quiet about it!  Free Mason my arse.  Since when did you become a FreeMason?  Did you ever swear an oath of secrecy?  Coming here to pretend to be a FreeMasopn.

I'm sure there are hundreds of FreeMasons in this Forum that would never ever, make known their membership of the Craft.  Stupid bugger!

You want more, you'll get it.  Remember, you asked for it.



kiwi992.

Hi,

That crap may fly if you are a yahoo boy writing 419 letters. ooooooooooooooo

I don't know how it is that speaking and writing correct English grammar could be termed crappy but then again, that's your own view. 

I'm not quite sure what a 'Yahoo boy' means but I do know that 419 is a Nigerian phenomena.  My postings here are not in any way related to writing 419 letters, neither have I got time for that kind of rubbish.



kiwi992.

Hi,


I doubt it very much.

Can't see anything wrong with it.  It is perfectly right to say 'which of them has got an incorrect grammar in it'.  Which ONE of the postings, that is.  Singular, remember? Singular man, SINGULAR.



kiwi992.

Kapten,


You are such a twit for calling me a liar.  How dare you?  You plonker!  Typical Nigerian attitude - anybody whose views you don't agree with, must be lying.  Donkey!!   

What do you know about English grammar anyway?  One could be speaking perfect English grammar from now until the cows come home and you wouldn't even know the difference.  You are such an illiterate - more like a thieving, corrupt politician or robbing banker who seeks protection by joining a secret society.

I have made over three hundred (300) postings in this Forum.  Tell me which of them has got an incorrect grammar in it.  Just pull out one and tell me.  Stupid diversionary tactics that don't wash.  Nutter!!

You know what?  I can teach the English themselves, (yes, you heard me right - the English people) how to speak their own grammar correctly.  That includes the so-called BBC English.

You members of some of the secret societies have been exposed by the British press.  Oh yes!!!  I know what you guys are up to, including the signals that you give, midnight meetings, the sacrifices that MUST be made, the oaths and so on.  I'd advice you to shut your ugly face and go back to your cave and scheme on how to sacrifice a family member's life for money and material gain!.

Talking about membership of the Free Masons, you said in this thread that you are a member of the Free Masons didn't you?  Yeah?  In that case, did you take an oath?  Yes, you must have.  What did the oath specifically tell you?

SECRECY - yeah, secrecy is what the oath tells you to maintain.  That you must NOT let anybody know that you are a member of such a secret society.

What have you been telling us here?  The fact that you are a member of the Free Masons.  Shame on you for having broken the golden rule of your secret society.  It doesn't matter even if you did it under an alias.  The fact is that you've broken a golden rule of the Free Masons.  I think you should be prepared for the consequences, don't you?

You simply are NOT fit to be a member of the Free Masons, that's for sure.  I haven't got the time of day for a fool like you.  How so bloody stupid you are.



kiwi992.

Hi All,


You are still not reading my post to make much sense of it, are you? 

As I said, I am not a Free Mason so don't know what names you guys call your secret meeting places.  I was only relaying what was mentioned to me.  Again, I couldn't see the point in the gentleman lying to me either.  You are the ones that know what you call your dark, dingy secret meeting places - Lodge, Super Lodge, Grand Lodge or whatever.   
You can doubt me as much as you bloody well like.  You think everybody lies like you lot out there.  Typical Nigerian attitude - doubt whatever people say because they themselves can not be trusted.  I wondered when the term 'oga kpata kpata' meant anything other than 'big man'.   

Why would anybody want to join a secret society?  What for?  Yeah, what for?  You lot and your bloody secret societies.  The British press exposed you guys years ago and we all know what you are up to.  Don't come here to try and fool people 'cos it was on TV.     

Even the son of a Free Mason (or similar, here on this or the Ogboni thread) has rejected your sect.  Any wonder as to why?  You go figure.

Oh yeah, talking about my English grammar, please point out to me as to where my grammar is incorrect.  I can teach you a lot about English grammar and comprehension, that's for sure.  Ten times more educated than you are as well.

KAPTEN - I noticed that almost all of your postings in this Forum have been about nothing but religion, causing controversy everywhere.  Why don't you do a search on me (if you haven't already done so) and see the difference.  Maybe you should learn to be more thoughtful in dealing with people 'cos all I notice about you is nothing but resentment amongst members.   

My question still stands:  WHY WOULD ANYBODY WANT TO JOIN A SECRET SOCIETY?



kiwi992

Mate,


You ought to be more civil and polite in your posting, instead of judging people off-hand.  Okay?

There are many things wrong with your write up.Number one your boss cant possibly be the Grand Master of Freemasons in England.That I know for a fact.He might be holding some other position which you wrongly concluded its the Grand Master.

Two : there is only one  regular Grand Lodge in England, one in Scotland and one in Ireland, so which one in the UK are you talking about? He cant be the Grand Master of all three and possibly not any of them.Trust me on this. A Freemason he might be, but not the Grand Master.

There isn’t anything wrong whatsoever with my posting.  Nothing at all and you either take it or leave it.  Do not go presuming otherwise.

If you don’t like my posting because you feel there’s something ‘wrong’ with it, then by all means, reply to it BUT stick to the statements that I made in the posting which you feel are wrong and never, ever, try and put words in my own mouth.  In other words, do NOT say things that are not strictly mentioned in my posting ‘cos that makes you look stupid.

You know what?  This is one sad thing that I noticed in this Forum.  Whenever people do not agree with one’s postings or views, they jump to the conclusion that there are untruths in the one’s posting, thus giving the impression that the one is lying.  How so wrong!  We simply can not all be liars, or can we?
 
I'm not a Free Mason.  I presume you are one, so should know the difference in the names of the various Lodges – I don’t.  I could but only relate the story that he told me.  I don't know which name is which. 

Perhaps you ought to read and re-read my posting and take good note of what I said:

1.  ‘Investiture’ (there’s no mention of Grand Master in my posting!) 
2.  'UK North West'' (this is NOT the same as England or Scotland).

You really ought to read and understand what I said before jumping to any conclusion in your eagerness to defend your secret society.

He was right about you having to change your life style, it all depends on what kind of life style you lived.If you were of dubious character Freemasonry isn't for you. He meant you are going to be upright and shun all crime..

Sod you!

Shun what bloody crime?  What on earth makes you think I live a life of crime?  You simply can not read and understand basic English can you?  My posting is there for everyone to read.

Since when does the statement:

1.  I would have to change my lifestyle (happy-go-lucky, carefree life)

equate to a life of criminality?  You are so cheeky and ignorant, I'm speechless!  How dare you? 

What do you know about me anyway?  Yeah, what do you know about me?  Thirty four years in the UK and not got myself into any trouble of any kind, let alone arrested by the police.  What does that tell you?  I’m sure I’m a damn sight more upright than most people out there, and that includes YOU!  Most of all, I don’t have to live a life of secrecy like you do.

What on earth do you know about my friends?  Making friends of ‘dubious character’ my arse!  You ought to think carefully before making all sorts of ridiculous statements, considering that you don’t even know me.  Cheeky sod!   

People like you are the ones that give the Free Masons a very bad name 'cos you jump to their defence ever so quickly, thus giving people the impression that you lot have got something to hide.  Maybe you ought to think about it most carefully before doing so next time, unlike how you’ve chosen to carry on defending them in this thread.

Why are you so defensive?  Why?  Are you reading the response of posters here at all?

Any wonder as to why you have such bad press all over the world?  There was a brouhaha about the Free Masons in the UK, a few years ago, thus forcing them to open their doors to members of the public, inorder to repair their tarnished image.  Who would blame them for it when people like you are constantly giving them a negative image by being so defensive.



kiwi992.

Hi All,



I'm not at all sure as to whether or not the Free Masons do evil things as some people here tend to think. 

Having said that, I once had the opportunity of joing the Free Masons here in the UK, purely because of my working with one of their top-most members.  This gentleman and I worked together in the accountancy practice that he owned.  His daughter whom I'd dated in the past, introduced me to her dad, hence the job came about.  He and I worked very well together and indeed, got on well, even though I wasn't seeing his daughter at the time.

One day, as we were having lunch together, he said to me that he would like to introduce me to the Free Masons, inorder for me to become a member, if I wanted.  He then went on to say that they were soon going to perform the rite of investiture on him so as to become the head of ALL the Grand Lodges in the UK North West.

Whooa!  I thought to myself, both scared and mystified at the same time, not quite knowing how to take it all in.  Just the mere thought that this man that I was working with was such an oga kpata kpata in the Free Masons, and that he must have sussed me out or indeed, thought highly of me to suggest such a thing to me - a foreigner of Nigerian origin.

Anyway, he asked me to consider the following factors before deciding as to whether to join or not:

That

1.  I would have to change my lifestyle (happy-go-lucky, care-free life) 
2.  Once I'd joined, I wouldn't be able to keep most of my existing friends
3.  I wouldn't be able to speak as freely and openly as I presently did

On reaching home, I discussed it with my woman.  We then came to the conclusion that it would NOT be wise for me to join.  We felt that there were too many unknowns, despite the many advantages of being a member.

One thing I know for sure is that the Free Masons always look after their own and that most of the highly-placed people in the UK are members.  That said, I don't ever regret not joining, 'cos I didn't quite know what I was letting myself in for, had I joined.

Anybody thinking of joining such secret societies should think about it most carefully before taking such a major step in the one's life.



kiwi992.

Iyimbere Na2day,


You're alright man. No probs. We learn everyday.

Easy now!



kiwi992.

Iyimbere Na2day,


Cool. 

The correct reply should have been either:

1.  ibim or
2.  ibi wu rari

Again, it is 'iyimbere' but not 'ibere', in the most grammatically correct Kalabari language which is only spoken in Bakana as opposed to the other Kalabari towns and villages.

Sorry, just a small correction.             



kiwi992.

NB:  ibere means 'my case'

Iyimbere Na2day,


Tobara?

Hope you bloody understood that!



kiwi992.

Hi Ed,


Sorry about the late response - been caught-up in the About SAP and Pilot Career threads in the Careers section.

Well, I don't know much about Ada and his worldly possessions 'cos I wasn't there to witness all that.  Moreover, things like that don't mean much to me 'cos I've grown up to have a different set of values.  I still like my gadgets though, just like him.

One thing I know for sure is that he (Ada) and I were very close - just like two best friends.  Something that you rarely ever see amongst African families, unlike in European families.  This strong father-son friendship was stressed upon, when our family members from Iyalla's compound got me all dressed up in native attire, singing 'Ibiduo, dabo ikiabo', whilst escorting me to Sokunoma Polo (with an 'omonibo' in front of me), inorder for me to pay my last respects to my late mum as she laid on her death bed.  Anyway, that was then, this is now. 

I understand Olobo is in Canada.  Actually, since Ada's death, I've cut off all ties from Lali and her siblings 'cos of the way their mum treated me whilst I was a kid.  The utterances that she used to come out with, one can't just forgive and forget.  Forgive, yeah, but definitely not forget.  We always used to fall-out, yet I was supposed to be her Godson as well.  We never got on, hence my having had to live with Auntie Majorba before coming over to the UK. 

You know what?  You simply do NOT insult a person that's dead especially if that person never did anything wrong to you whilst the one was alive.  Pure jealousy, if you ask me - jealousy because of the love that Ada had for me as his most favourite son.

In Kalabari they say 'fitebo wori wori a'.  That person that Sisi (Lali's mum) was insulting was my late mum.  Needless to say, I had to jump to my mum's defence by insulting her (Sisi's) mum back, oh yes! - even though a very young kid and extremely vulnerable at that time.  Mums are equal, they say.  I'm most glad to this day that I did defend my late mum.  I'd have felt very bad about it, had I not done so.  Indeed, some of her utterances to me whilst I was a kid are not worth repeating here. 

Then again, that's step-mums for you - which step-mum out there isn't like that?  The proverbial 'wicked' step-mother, ha ha!  At least she never, ever, laid her fingers on me - I'll give her credit for that, as well as giving me weekly pocket money whilst we lived in Lagos.  She also took good care of me, as a kid, considering that I am not her own son.  Credits to her, again.  Even then, I still prefer to keep my distance - a very sad decision really, 'cos Lali and Dagogo really understand me, being that we all lived together in Lagos.  Indeed, Tokini looked so much like me when she was very little.  I think she still does now.   
 
Auntie Majorba was really kind to me.  As I said before, I did live with her for a while in Diobu before coming over to the UK.  I do remember her kids with Dr Braide - Amama, Laabo and Ibiso.  Bre was also kind to us as kids - he usually bought us fireworks during Xmas.  His children being Dokuboba, Wisdom, Ibiba, Iria and Kaine.  Oh yeah, and our uncle MaiBro.

I was Papa's favourite nephew as well 'cos he, like Ada (our dad), used to come to Diobu and take me out.  Ada - whenever he was celebrating something special 'cos I was his best friend, and Papa - whenever he needed to go out and have a good time.  Papa was the name we called our uncle - the late Chief Vincent Yellowe (Inedi's dad).  Papa did live in Port Harcourt (Aggrey Road) after the war.  He (Papa) used to hand over a big bag full of money for me to take care of, whilst we were out.  He was truly an Engineer that built boats, launches, as well as re-building car and motorbike engines from scratch.  Indeed, my interest in aircraft engines started only because of him.   

Oh yeah, talking about whilst we lived in Lagos, uncle Lloyd Romeo's wife, a kind-hearted Yoruba lady (Soji and Ayo's mum) was really good to me.  Same as Inedi's wife - a Calabar lady.  Iman and Levi Braide (now a politician, I hear) were also good to me as a kid.  I only ever used to see Joe Iyalla whilst he visited us.  So, so many relatives - it's so hard to remember all their names.

You know what I miss most about home?  All those masquerades that you mentioned.  Owuama, okolo kurukuru, and the rest.  Owuama number three, especially.  Is it kpukudam or kukudam?  I've forgotten the right name for it.  You should hear me speak Kalabari - like birinbo!.  Shame really, 'cos I have to think carefully about the words before speaking. 

I do remember Igbekiri with its sandy beaches, but not the beach parties 'cos I wasn't there then.  This must've been long after the war.  There wasn't even a Boys High School in Bakana then, other than the girls', let alone oil fields.

Very sad to hear about all what's happening in BK - killings and all what not.  Sad, very sad.  Actually, I don't remember Adokiye or Alapakate Iyalla either.  Still, violence is not the answer to solve problems.  I'm most shocked to hear about all the problems in our town.  I'd probably go to Nyemoni to stop for a bit if I do go visiting home 'cos wa mine ama ofiri ari. 

Actually, my friend - Ibanibo Lawson was bumped off during his holidays at home.  It all started with the madness from which he died.  Sad really, so, so sad.  Bastards!



kiwi992.

Hey Briz,



You said:

I welcome Monsieur Kiwi back to da forum wiv his rightful identity.

I never, ever change my identity - kiwi992 always, kiwi992 forever.  I'm sure you do know my style of writing by now.

Can I just say that Markos has been in SAP much longer than I have, so be rest assured you guys would be well looked-after.  Needless to say, he's just as able to steer you guys along the right path whilst I break-out of this thread for now.

He is the one person here that I can confidently hand over the helm to, 'cos he's genuinely helpful, knows what he's talking about, and most of all, without a chip on his shoulder, doesn't blag or full of his own self-importance. 

Flying light aeroplanes is my passion in life and I need to concentrate more on that.  Summer is here and it's the flying season.  Engine to service, airframe to see to, flying adventures to go on, and so on.  Oh yeah, and writing my will, just in case I die up there, whilst flying!



kiwi992.

Hi,


Yeah man!

O mo kpe mo gbo Yoruba?  Well, mo ti gba gbe some.



kiwi992.

Omo,


Yeah, mo fe shine shoo.  I wo nko?

O-ni sense humour man, o too serious.  Chaa! 



kiwi992.

Hi All,


I hear you cry 'rubbish' and 'stupid'.  How so strange!   

What's the rubbish and stupidity about it?  Haven't you guys got a sense of humour?  Is it because of the sexual connotation?  Yeah, so what? 

Talking about stupidity, maybe you guys could take a look at my track record in this Forum by doing a simple search on my name and tell me who the stupid one is - you lot or I. 

It's obvious you guys have got a totally different sense of humour in Nigeria.  Perhaps too busy plotting some scam such that you can not see the lighter side to life.



kiwi992.

Hi All,


This would get you rolling in laughter:

[flash=425,344]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PQitC-z73o[/flash]

Credits to the original poster in YouTube.



kiwi992.

Hi Seg,


I'm sorry about the delay in answering your questions on Saturday, as promised.  Too many things going on over the week-end, as it's a Bank Holiday over here in the UK.

Yeap, you are in the right Forum for all your SAP questions.  This thread is to help fellow Nigerians to get on the ladder so that our people are not left behind in this highly challenging enterprise resource planning technology.  If in doubt, please read and re-read the entire thread 'cos I'm sure it answers all your questions.

Don't take any notice of all those people who pretend to know something about SAP, yet haven't got a deep knowledge of it by way of an actual hands-on experience in implementing the product.  This is where the challenge lies - successfully implementing the SAP R/3, as opposed to the limited knowledge of a Functional Consultant who only has an expertise in a specific module (or modules).

Oyibos are worse for pretending to know something when they don't, as most of them shy away from education, (unlike Nigerians), preferring to work with minimal education, and instead, picking on people's brains in the workplace, to make up for their lack of knowledge.

Can I just say that before answering your questions, I'd like to inform everyone reading this thread that this would be my last posting on this subject.  This is the last - the very last because I'm weary of answering questions after questions on SAP 'cos it gets boring after a while.  I won't oblige to requests anymore either, since people find it hard to say 'thanks'.  Any further question or request would be ignored, and I mean that.

Moreover, I feel that a lot of people are only keen on acquiring the SAP training material without any intention, whatsoever, of ever training to qualify as SAP Consultants.  If anyone thinks that this training (as well as certification) is going to be a walk in the park, then the one needs to have the one's head seriously examined 'cos SAP is NOT like your typical Microsoft or Cisco certification.  The rewards that SAP Consultants reap go a long way to prove this point.  As I've always maintained, it's never going to be easy but with perseverance, dogged determination and hard work, these exams are not impossible to scale.  I know it 'cos I've been through the mill.

I simply can not understand as to why my fellow-Nigerians lose heart so easily simply because they face stumbling blocks on the way to training for the SAP Consultancy certification.  They seem to forget that nothing comes easy to anyone in this world, and that hard work dearly pays.

My fellow-Nigerians, where is the indomitable, never-say-die spirit in you?  Where is it?  Where's the gumption in you?  Why give up so easily? Why?  Don't you want a great life for yourself and family? Why ona dey fea fo dis course? Ona no be Naija pipu again?

Pass those SAP Consultancy exams and you'll get a great job, at least in Nigeria, for sure, 'cos SAP would soon take-off there.  Aside from Nigeria, think of the African continent as a whole - there's an untapped SAP market yet to take-off.  Use your imagination and get on with it - just do it!  You won't regret it, I can assure you.

Look at the army of Nigerians in the Cisco and Microsoft certification threads in this Forum (CCNA and CCNP) as well as the 'Computers' sub-Forum.  They are all too busy chasing after useless IT certifications that won't get them anywhere, unlike SAP.  I know that those certs are absolutely useless 'cos I've got all of them, gathering dust inside my briefcase, as no employer wants to know, despite excellent examination results and experience.  This is quite unlike SAP where recruiters and employers literally worship the ground that you walk on, simply because you are certified or highly experienced in the technology.

Why bother to train, learning how to configure Cisco routers, using a sim (simulator), considering that what the one actually needs, inorder to get the all-important hands-on skills, is an actual Cisco router.  How many organisations in Nigeria use those damn expensive Cisco routers?  How many?  Very few (I'm sure), considering that there are modern and indeed, better routers out there that do exactly the same job and can be obtained for a much cheaper price.

In SAP, all the one needs to get the hands-on skills is the SAP R/3 IDES software, yet Nigerians shy away from that certification simply because it's nowhere as easy to obtain, unlike those stupid and useless certifications from Microsoft and Cisco.

People worrying about jobs in SAP even before they've passed the Consultancy certification exams (a psychological barrier), to think that they've already got jobs right now.  Which of those useless IT certs would pay you £5000 per week in its heyday?  None of them okay? - none of them!  Right now, even with the market for SAP having saturated in the West, senior SAP Consultants can easily earn £2500 (or more) per week, globe-trotting, unlike those useless certs from Microsoft and Cisco.

It just beats me because my fellow-Nigerians, considered by the whole world to be extremely intelligent people, can not see the light - blindly chasing after useless Cisco and Microsoft certifications when their best option, from personal experience, is nothing but SAP.  A little bit of a stumbling block and they all give up.

Yeah, give up because they haven't got the balls to stand the heat.  Throw in the towel when things are not going their own way and move on to the next rubbish IT certification instead - CISA and CISSP included.  An absolute disgrace and a bloody waste of time, if you ask me.

Maybe they should come over to the West and face what we, as black people, face everyday - that would make them grow a thick skin and become mentally very strong, ready to face any challenge that's thrown at them.  Never mind being spoon-fed in Nigeria, moaning about this, moaning about that, looking for sweetners and backhanders, here, there, everywhere, for the least thing or wanting to work in some crummy bank (inorder to get closer to the till), despite their academic or professional background.  Shame, really.  

I'll see what you, my fellow-Nigerians would do when all those Indian SAP Consultants take over your rightful jobs when the proposed investment in Nigeria by SAP AG materialises.  Kick yourselves, most probably.   

Having had a good rant, I shall now go about addressing your questions:

1.  Sorry to hear about your misfortune as regards the virus infection on your PC.  Most certainly, the files in a hard drive can become corrupt for a whole host of reasons including virus infection, shutting down the system without following the proper shutdown procedure, bluescreen, and so on.  Indeed, this is can happen, even if the files are on a separate hard drive within the computer.  The possibilities of this happening are endless.

Personally, I'd forget it, move on, start afresh and have the ECC 6.0 SR2 or 3 installed, instead of trying to salvage the old IDES 4.7 implementation.  You'd be much better-off with IDES ECC 6.0 anyway. 

2.  In practise, many factors determine the minimum requirements for the implementation of SAP R/3.  In this regard, the organisation could use 'Quicksizer' to enable the hardware vendor determine the optimum.  Reference can also be made to the installation DVDs to determine this minimum. 

In your own case, the SAP R/3 IDES ECC 6.0 can be implemented on a laptop, as long as you have enough hard drive space on your computer - at least 250gb (500gb preferable), this depends on the type of database you are using (e.g. MS SQL, Oracle, MaxDB or DB2), a minimum of 2gb memory (3gb or more is better), at least Pentium4/AMD and above, in terms of processor.

SAP R/3 can be implemented on any Windows platform with NTFS file system (for security).  However, Windows Server 2003 is the preferred choice by SAP.  That said, the IDES ECC 6.0 can be implemented on a lower-spec machine but the trade-off is slow speed.  Personally, I'd ensure that my laptop meets the minmum requirements 'cos I wouldn't want it to run slowly.

Then again, you could always install it on an external hard drive that's connected to your laptop.  That way, at least you know that the installation would be safe, just in case anything goes wrong with the machine.

Yuu fo go fo dat place gon gon, dey luuk fo de propa ting wey yuu go take len.  Mke yuu no forget de name.  Yuu sef yuu tok am hea.  Owambe, e boku boku, shey gbo?  Mke yuu dey press the 'luuk-luuk' button to find am.

3.  Good idea about your training strategy - I totally agree with you.  There's no need to worry about your minimal IT skills.  The main thing is the ability to navigate your way around in a computer.  The key thing is your academic or professional background mapping to a functional module of your choice in SAP.  You can not afford to get that bit wrong 'cos otherwise, you'd find the training really hard-going.

Pass the consultancy certification exam first, then get a job, build up confidence with the product by constantly using the hands-on skills that you acquired during your training, before eventually branching out to the technical arena, if you wanted to, and indeed, feel confident-enough to do so.

4.  As I've always said, please ensure that your academic or professional background maps well with the module of your choice in SAP.  There's no 'combo' in the real sense of it - these are separate modules to meet the various business processes of an organisation.  You can get more information on SD, MM, PP, Logistics, or similar newer offerings by going to SAP's website.

I hope I've answered all your questions.  All the best to you in your quest for SAP Consultancy certification.



kiwi992.

^{Nigerian jobs for Nigerians.}