Politics › Re: Ikpeazu Delivers 'Made-In-Aba' Shoes To Obasanjo (Photos) by Lilimax(f): 7:44am On Nov 15, 2016 |
Akuko uwa!  |
Jokes Etc › Important Message From The Senate by Lilimax(op): 10:35pm On Nov 13, 2016 |
Happy Sunday Pals! I stumbled on this beautiful government policy that is worthy reading and applying for.......
Relief for everybody: Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment.
This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).
Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Government to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination).
Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).
A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as the Government deems appropriate.
Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).
Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the Government.
Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Government has always prided its self on the amount of SHIT it gives our citizens.
Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of your Congressional Representative, who has been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle.
Sincerely,
The Senate committee on Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.)
Author : Unknown |
Politics › Re: FG To Establish Air Force Station, School In Zamfara by Lilimax(f): 8:56am On Nov 13, 2016 |
E no consign me  |
Politics › Re: No Ransom Paid To Free 21 Chibok Girls – DHQ by Lilimax(f): 8:47am On Nov 13, 2016 |
Ok |
Politics › Re: Jonathan Tells Americans To Stop Protesting Against Trump. Nigerians React by Lilimax(f): 8:51pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
adegeye38: This fool ought to be in prison Go lock am nah  |
Politics › Re: Oshiomhole Holds Thanksgiving Mass To Mark End Of His Tenure In Office(photos) by Lilimax(f): 8:35pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
Lovely! In nomine Patris et Filii et Spiritus Sancti. Amen!!! |
Celebrities › Re: Saint Obi To Give Fans N100k Recharge Cards On His Birthday, Fans Hail Him (pics by Lilimax(f): 6:20pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
November babies are da best  |
Foreign Affairs › Re: Donald Trump And Barack Obama Meet At White House-BBC by Lilimax(f): 4:57pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
lailo: D election was based on racism Not at all! He is God's choice for American this season  |
Foreign Affairs › Re: Donald Trump And Barack Obama Meet At White House-BBC by Lilimax(f): 4:56pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
Donald Trump, American president elect! Shocker of the whole world but I saw it coming God usually use the foolish things of this world to shame the wise. 1 Corinthians 1:27  |
Politics › Re: The Largest Political Parties In Nigeria by Lilimax(f): 2:57pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
Another senseless thread hitting the front page today?  |
Politics › Re: Female Suicide Bombers Killed By Soldiers In Borno This Morning. Graphic Photos by Lilimax(f): 2:11pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
And one yeye Jigawa State Governos wants to build 79 mosques in his state? Misplaced priority  Instead of focusing on building schools not Islamic schools to salvage some of these young lads that have been brainwashed in various Koranic schools  |
Politics › Re: Female Suicide Bombers Killed By Soldiers In Borno This Morning. Graphic Photos by Lilimax(f): 2:06pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
chuose2: Jesus died for Christians.
Moslems die for MOhammed.
Yet Jesus is alive, and mohammed is dead & buried.
Yet some moslems will come and say to leave Jesus that lives to follow the dead mohammed ? |
Politics › Re: Female Suicide Bombers Killed By Soldiers In Borno This Morning. Graphic Photos by Lilimax(f): 2:05pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
franchizy: This female suicide bombers can never be muslims or a Northerner because no muslim or a Northerner can kill themselves because Islam is a religion of peace.
I suspect a cospiracy here because our sisters from the other part of the Niger can do anything for money.
May God watch over His children.
Amin. Huh @ the highlighted  |
Crime › Re: Nigerian To Be Executed In Singapore For Drug Trafficking by Lilimax(f): 1:02pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
Enuguboy4nsk: jealous kee...we Enugu people have got the largest and most beautiful city in south east and one of the best in Nigeria...so why will I be jealous of those that use illegality to make money....such a shame from chidinma to drug smugglers
anambra is just good in two things: either their men put cocaine into the anus to smuggle to China or their women like chidinma put it into her vajina to get fame ndi anambra una too like those two holes inbetween the legs. make una change una ways and focus on your problems before meddling into that of others Who gave access to internet this boy? |
Crime › Re: Nigerian To Be Executed In Singapore For Drug Trafficking by Lilimax(f): 1:01pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
Enuguboy4nsk: u too...u've been noticed
ga zue ike....nwanyi cucumber Cucumber is a fruit and beside it is stale  |
Crime › Re: Nigerian To Be Executed In Singapore For Drug Trafficking by Lilimax(f): 1:00pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
Enuguboy4nsk: taa mechie IKPU ure gi ahu....cucumber gal I can see painment  Pele!  |
Crime › Re: Nigerian To Be Executed In Singapore For Drug Trafficking by Lilimax(f): 12:59pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
Enuguboy4nsk: kee efulefu bu ihe a.....biko si ebe a puo..... ke ihe gbasaram ihe in'eche ??
Abu m nwa afo Igbo gburugburu....Ndi Anambra ajoka hooha You're just being jealous of ndi Omambala  It kills very fast  |
Crime › Re: Nigerian To Be Executed In Singapore For Drug Trafficking by Lilimax(f): 12:57pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
Enuguboy4nsk: maka gini kam ga eji nwe obi ufu.....unu by ndi ogwu ego.....afia cocaine ka unu JI aba-uba ....yes u heard me right 'ndi Anambra ajoka' Biko jee nodu odu! You've been noticed  |
Crime › Re: Nigerian To Be Executed In Singapore For Drug Trafficking by Lilimax(f): 12:56pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
Enuguboy4nsk: nna osighi m n'aka.....ndi Anambra ma otu esi akpasu nmadu iwe......ha kachisi akpari nmadu...achorom kam nyegodi ha obere ogwu ha n'enye ndi ozo
biko ka iwe gi juo oyi
besides we all know anambra youths alone insert drugs into the anus and their women use cucumber to masturbate Taa mechie eze ure gi afu!  |
Politics › Re: "The More I Tried To Make Edo Perfect, The More I Realise It Can't Be Done" by Lilimax(f): 9:19am On Nov 11, 2016 |
MadCow1: As long as UNIBEN remains a part of Edo State... Not even Pres. Elect Donald Trump can make Edo great again..  |
Politics › Re: Jigawa To Construct 90 Mosques, Opens Bid by Lilimax(f): 9:12am On Nov 11, 2016 |
That Jigawa State Governos should be investigated or better still be in EFCC watch list  |
Politics › Re: "Why Fatima Buhari Became 4th Wife" - The Capital by Lilimax(f): 8:00am On Nov 11, 2016 |
Halix75: Hello guys, I don't know the sources of this lies but to put the record straight, Fatima was married to a very respectful and gentle man whom I know very well even before she met her husband, am one of those who took her marriage box's from kaduna to Daura when she was still in ABU Zaria, attended all the wedding activities, visit their house at wish in sabon kawo kaduna. Her husband never beat women in his life but they have been having family issues which is normal and the woman was so difficult and arrogant and commanding more especially when her father became the president. After all effort to settle the issue by a state Governor and family members proveed abortive She got her divorce just before last Ramadan fasting and not all the kids are sickle cells patient. The husband did very well in keeping her despite all the difficulties. Think of it guys the husband is a serving commissioner of Finance in one of the states, the same party with her father and didn't divorce his wife until when her father became the president of the country? Please we should always do just by writing what is real. I believe your story cos it loos real  However, if the lady remains arrogant, it is the same arrogant that'll drive her away from her new husband's house |
Politics › Re: Mohammed Babangida And Yakolo Indimi In Battle After Divorce by Lilimax(f): 7:44am On Nov 11, 2016 |
This is one thing with all these arangee marriage  Most people from these part of the country as well most political elites choose matching -making their children for marriage to sustain their political class; forgetting that marriage that is not borne out of love will hit the rock sooner or later  |
Crime › Re: Young Woman Raped To Death In Ogun by Lilimax(f): 3:26pm On Nov 10, 2016*. Modified: 5:59pm On Nov 10, 2016 |
ijustdey: Her body has shrunk and she was frail. She was not from this community. I think this case is beyond ordinary rape; it has a ritual undertone,” he said. Ogun states is gradually turning to den of ritualists  |
Crime › Re: Men Apprehended In Abuja After Trying To Buy Dollars With Fake Naira Notes. PICS by Lilimax(f): 3:23pm On Nov 10, 2016 |
The don beat this man so tey im mouth resemble kpomo  I can see A!boki and Ipob united in this crime  |
Sports › Re: NFF Unveils New Jersey For Super Eagles After Signing Multimillion Naira Deal by Lilimax(f): 3:21pm On Nov 10, 2016 |
E no go pass green-white and green  Abi our national colour don change  ? |
Christianity Etc › Re: Helen Oritsejafor Celebrates Her Husband On His Birthday. PICS by Lilimax(f): 3:19pm On Nov 10, 2016 |
realglobe: a pastors wife saying boyfriend sounds awkward Nothing is wrong about it. You need to fall in love again and again... That's how to keep your marriage sweet  |
Politics › Re: Replace Oyegun With Oshiomhole As APC Chair —onoriode by Lilimax(f): 2:32pm On Nov 10, 2016 |
So of all the happenings in the country, this is what is bothering this man?  Replacement of Odigie Oyegun  |
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Politics › Re: Clinton Lost Because She Wanted To Edit The Holy Bible – Doyin Okupe by Lilimax(f): 1:55pm On Nov 10, 2016 |
nurusystem: bible is edited already, sowhat r u saying In your dream abi? Abeg the Bible is so different from that Satanic verses  |
Politics › Re: Clinton Lost Because She Wanted To Edit The Holy Bible – Doyin Okupe by Lilimax(f): 1:53pm On Nov 10, 2016 |
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Celebrities › Re: Saint Obi Steps Out For AFRIMMA Awards In Lagos (Photos) by Lilimax(f): 11:39am On Nov 10, 2016 |
Age has caught up with him  : We cannot cheat nature all through our life... He's still looking good BTW. |