₦airaland Forum

*Eleven ways to stay safe from the dreaded Monkey Pox:*

1. Avoid Monkey meat especially the Kanda.

2. Avoid that alcoholic concoction called Monkey Tail or Monkite or Kpanrangan.

3. Avoid Monkey Cage when u visit any Zoo until further advised.

4. Avoid Chinese Films especially 'Snake in The Monkey Shadow'.

5. Avoid Monkey (Wayo) Business, especially my Igbo brothers.

6. If u luv playing football like me please avoid 'Monkey Post' for now until after the 2018 World Cup in Russia.

7. For the sake of ur life, avoid watching those Hausa & Togolese men who carry Monkeys about in Major Nigerian cities, especially Lagos, in the name of entertainment & magic. If not u will just die troway!!!

8. Don't ever use the phrase 'Monkey no fine but im Mama like am' else the pox will come upon u like a Hurricane.

9. Don't allow any of ur children to be jumping upandan like Monkey else dem go catch am o! It is better they jump like Antelope or any other animal.

10. Run 440 if u spot anyone with the disease. Avoid unnecessary physical contacts, especially in Bayelsa State & always wash & sanitise ur hands b4 eating. If u can help it, stay in ur house until this scourge is sent to meet its cousin (Ebola Virus) in the pit of hell.

11. Avoid wearing Monkey jacket.

Please spread to others...
Spread THIS MESSAGE not MONKEY POX O!!�

Zeroid105:
Politics aside. There is nothing wrong in revoking contracts which were actually put together against relevant laws.

Which laws?

VIPERVENOM:
Meaning he overdosed on some drug, inhaled a poisonous gas.......... or he was murdered

Or had an asthma attack (if he is asthmatic)

Daboomb:
You cant lockup someone in their Car!

The occupants inside a vehicle cn easily open the vehicle form inside.

Chai, buy car first or borrow one to try it out.

Guy could have been choked to death and then dumped inside the car.

Suffocation: To die due to lack of air (oxygen).
*Locked in an enclosed place where air cannot enter
*Strangled and prevented from breathing

Asthma attack is also suffocation!

joystickextend1:
Suffocation?

Yes o! Maybe AC finish as dem dey drive am to him house naim make am suffocate!

Homeboiy:
Its a lie

What is the lie?

The autopsy result?
David re-invitation?
Or the entire story?

Kasalaaaaaa!!!!!!

aolawale025:
This is damage control. They could have adjusted the mail register!

Gbam! Letter that he wrote since august! No be today their lies start.

Lies!

This is what we need competition not monopoly!

Most political office holders in rivers are cultists. From odili to amechi to wike's tenure.

Opakan2:
Good news!

Next is Dame Patience and Ngozi ole

Its half good news because another criminals' 48 houses were returned to him.

SillyMods:
Which govt was that?

If you add proof, it will make sense to sane minds.

What kind of proof do u want?

Prec1ous:
I thought it was just me.

This is a total lie.

This was the woman my guy and this was the man with this same children.

This bloggers no get joy

Lol

sarutobie:
He has good reasons to think so..:if a dictator and coup plotter could convince professors, academicians and a 160 million people to vote for him, then it leaves a lot of doubt about the intelligence of the Nigerian voter.

Point of correction its not 160million people that voted for him!!

Some regions vehemently refused him. I suppose they are the intelligent bunch.

Mjshexy:
So why borrowing again

What of oil revenue? Custom duties? Tax duties?


Thieves!

No b dat woman whey throw bash for her husband?
Whey make d man dey cry

One NIgeria indeed!

Of course na they are UN peace keepers.

Tolexander:
Black Mamba!

It is a nocturnal snake that loves swallowing hen's eggs.
It is the snake behind killing of brooding hens at home and in the bush.

Many times killed by inserting a hook and line in a boiled egg tied down. It becomes stuck after swallowing the boiled egg. Banging itself on the ground for the egg to be broken. During the process, the hook gets hooked to its intestine and starts struggling to be freed from the line.

There is a myth about it in Yoruba. They say when it grows to a certain stage, it starts developing comb like a cock, and starts crowing like a cock to attract hens. Though I have outgrown that believe.

22 olodo likes and counting!

Black mamba are found only in southern africa. The name black came from the inside colour of their mouth. They are actually greyish or silver in colour.

Marcofranz:
i guess it dangerous cos it attacked the guy with spit.

Its cobra! Only cobra spits venom.

Very stupid talk! I wonder when succession became call for war?

The vultures and hyenas will turn deaf to this hate speech.

What will it take u to create a new personal email

You dont love him as u think or claim you do if not you wont agree for the damn break or even kiss another guy during that time. so like many has advised u here, leave him and end ur friendship with that so called friend!

[quote author=Mrchippychappy post=61300193][/quote]They don't read!

WinningSun:
who told you that. SA know an Ibo man ask those who are there.

Yeah dats why they killed ibrahim badmus.

Sense fall on u!

Him ear no dey work o! He no go hear una.

Am not surprised at all!! The vulture already tagged me a 5% so he is keeping to that his hate promise. Shame on all easterners serving in this demonic regime and also to our governors n senators.

Jokers cum scamers

When God threw satan out of heaven, he landed in africa!

Na me know! Idiots!