₦airaland Forum

NLjega:
[size=15pt] Once again, we would like to appreciate all our contestants. You're all queens.
This is the semi-finals, as much as we would love to have you all, 4contestants have to go tonight.

Total votes : 1,649

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Total accreditated votes: 1450
Total Void votes : 199
Total votes cast : 1450

The votes for each contestants are as follows... [/size]

oga no dey imitate atiru jega for here.

I roll my boat for twaci

In Britain that means, I cast me vote for lady twaci.


Cc: Nljega

Twaci:
With the sunrise comes happiness and love. Hope u are getting these vibes too?

its everywhere, its over killing. infact I am love and happiness

Internet.........


What tha bachag u did to me



Betcha watch your back, I doint foregive easily.

Twaci:
Thanks dear !

Good morning.

morning








ah the sun is finally out.

Choose this day whom you will vote for miss nairaaland, as for me and my E-hold we will vote for twaci

LarrySun:
Wow! You're awesome! We need people like you in the Literature Section. You'll be popular in no time; you'd make a great critic! Can you come over? Please?

I support the motion, Ruq pls come and spend the week at literature section... pls...

I vote TWACI

cc Nljega


The lil queen

dapotanye:
op, i guess you have mistaken hollywood for real life, its not? what you see is a picture they are trying to paint. For example you talked about a single knockout blow, what they telling you is that the person can give a single knockout blow simple.

my point exactly, hollywood aint real. Some Nigerians think that what they see in Hollywood are applicable in reality. Simple.

The voting thread now locked

iceberylin who are you and your friends voting for.

Too many images not showing o, nlOrubebe may use this against us.

No offence, alota imagee not showing

Twaci:
I believe in you anyways. You are smart and can (and will surely) ace your papers. Goodluck .

As for rainy nights, I agree with u. Snuggling under the blankie can be so....*sighs* AMAZING!

thanks alot, I will take you to see the queen, if you know what I mean.

Twaci:
On my side.

Don't mind me, my night was cold. It rained all through. Hope yours was better.

I would admit, I liked how it went. For the first time I didnt spend the night reading for exam, I slept like I knew I was going to sit next to my lecturer

It also rained heavily here, but I like rainy nights.

scentmarlc:
hhhahhahaahahahahhahahahhahah, laff yah kee me ooooooo. My prince how body nah

I dey my guy like adenuga. I just dey dance e yo keleleke, body dey sweet me yo keleleke, obi keleleke.

scentmarlc:
Wit her back lying on the bed and her eyes closed. Does that answer yur kweshun?

yeahit does in full details. Thanks for the clarity. Now do me a favour, run along.

Forever and for always twaci for miss nairaland.

Twaci:
Sure . Good morning.

morning. How did you sleep?

Gear up people, who ever u fancy. It only costs less than 239kb to vote.

The drummer beat is heard and the battle line drawn. Teamtwaci will not see defeat!

Twaci:
Thanks dear

it's nothing love, may I use the pic on my profile for you?

cowleg:
), YUSUPH1986 losprince(m), robosky02

Bros come out tomoro and exercise your franchise, Vote beautiful Miss Tohpahz for miss nairaland 2015

thanks for the opportunity mate, but I'm all about twaci.

Remaining twelve hours till Monday, enough to remember to cast your golden votes for the one we all love...











LOVE











Hmmmmmm












Like you dont know it's twaci... vote the queen fit to lead a colony.

Ruq:
I have two account on different movie sites, IMDb and Metacritic, when you get to read some reviews, you'll see some people also understand the whole hype about their movies, some annoy you so much because their just plotless. recently most of my ratings has been between 1-4 on a scale of 10.
The annoying thing is when I try talk with other people I get the awkward reply that "the movie is so interesting" and I'm left wondering what did I miss, their movies are getting too predictable, and sometimes they try attempt some plot twist that even worsen the whole story.

dude first of all you are a weirdo for you profile.

And then to the matter, you cant really blame the Hollywood fanatics. They've got so used to nonsense to point that when an upgraded nonsense gets thrown at them it seems so fantastic.

seankafor:
am a die hard fan of hollywood movie. All the allegations u made above some are false. When u talk about rambo not dying by ablow, before the movie u will understand that its either rambo is a superhuman in that movie or he has undergone hardship training unlike his enemies in the movie. I rep hollywood till thy kingdom come. Unlike our mediocre nollywood whch cant lease ordinary fighte jets, clean and well armed cops, beautiful scenarios other than the village. Infact phuk nollywood

bro. I am not trying to condemn Hollywood. I'm just stating that people should not think what they see in Hollywood movies are applicable in reality. I love Hollywood, to most people they make these mistakes for good entertainment reasons but when nollywood does the same, it's pure ignorance.

Ruq:
Hollywood is truly getting boring, most of the movies I watch this days are cliched

One of the most cliched plot in their movies is when a bad guy in a movie has been potrayed to be someone who can't hurt a fly and in the end they disclose to us the bad mofo he his.

And that of senseless explosions, while I went to watch Transformers 4, I was so bored all through the movie, the guy sittin next to me felt like punching me when I said boring ish. I can't blame him though he's still a kid who needs to see a lot of explosions for the movie to be interesting, annoying thing again was that everyone was watching the boring two hour movie and laughing at jokes that can't even crack a nut ad when I laughed nobody laughed. A lot of us here just take in whatever garbage they sholve to us. If only Holly would stop being predictable.

there are people who cant give a hollywood movie below 5 stars rating. Because of the craps nollywood serves us, anything hollywood does is now DA BOMB!

LarrySun:
That's exactly why they're called movies. There are some things you're expected to accept just for the plots to move on.

Above all, Hollywood still remains the grandfather on Nollywood.

But I want to ask a question; are Asian movies (kung-fus particularly) under the umbrella of Hollywood, too?

kung fus? They are on their own dimension totally.

whats everybody's favorite movie entertainment industry? Hollywood right? do you know that there are certain things that Hollywood rarely get right. but everybody applauds them for their attention to details.

when you ask a Nigerian what they are learning from Hollywood movies--I personally hate this silly question, asked by Nollywood fanatics.-- you would get
answer like:

* you can learn a lot of things that happen in the real world... but that's not the case. You see Hollywood is mostly make believe, and while they are trying to show you what you would love to see, some of the things they show can never happen in the real world.(Note: I'm not referring to fantasy or science fiction.)

bellow are somethings that Hollywood does wrong that gives the wrong impression on their audience.

THE QUICK DEATH

have you ever watched a Hollywood movie where a gunshot or a knife stab can end a dudes life instantly? I bet you've even lost counts on how many times you saw that. The hero shows up, takes precise shots at a bunch of people and they all die on the spot. A psycho stabs someone with a knife, the victim clutches the spot, and then they are dead.

the problem is no one dies instantly under such circumstances. Heart attacks, strokes, extremely abnormal heart rhythms can all cause instant deaths but gunshot wounds and knife stabs aren't advanced enough to end someone so quickly as we see in Hollywood movies. For a faster death to occur, the bullet would have to severely damage the brain stem, the heart, or the neck portion of the spinal cord. A shot at any other part of the body will result to loads of pain, but only bleeding can cause death, and that takes a while.

PRETTY DEAD BODIES

The deceased looks calm and peaceful, as if they were already made up and about to go hang out but decided to take a nap. You will notice that dead people are on make up, looking fresh and dazzling. In reality dead people are ugly (if not wugly). No matter what they looked like while alive, in death everyone is pale, waxy and gray. Their faces are swollen and they look dead, not relaxed and peaceful.
Most importantly, they smell bad. you see the actors discover a body that's been dead for days and they all act cool, taking in fresh breaths and having normal conversations. Never in reality can this happen.

THE DEAD MAN IS STILL BLEEDING

A detective arrives at a murder scene about half hour after the death and still sees blood flowing around. The corpse still spilling blood from its mouth and gunshot wound. But you see, blood clots within minutes of leaving the body and, dead people don't bleed. when you die you heart stops pumping blood and circulation stops. When blood stops moving, it clots, and clotted blood doesn't move, gush, ooze, or trickle from the body.
A bleeding body suggests that the person is still alive, but in many Hollywood movies, they are carried away and deposited in morgues for autopsy.

TIME OF DEATH

An above the limit IQ doctor examines the body and confidently announces: "Time of death is 11:22 pm?" and they don't tell us how they made that determination. Was is body temperature, or lividity? or perhaps the absence of certain bugs? In reality none of these forms of evidence can reveal the exact time of death, not even the combination of all. They can only produce an estimate, not a pinpoint.
e.g "Death likely occurred between 8 p.m. and midnight." but that obviously makes the Hero appear insignificant, and Hollywood likes its heroes to be smart, perhaps smarter than they can possibly be.

ONE-PUNCH KNOCKOUT SYSTEM

The hero jams his fist into the henchman's jaw. The unfortunate henchman goes down and we never hear from him again. But the hero, like most people, require a few solid blows to go down.
Think of a boxing match. Boxers are trained to knack the daylight out of opponents, but it still takes them time to accomplish that. Rambo may be able to render someone unconscious with a single blow, but real people (except, maybe Mike Tyson) can't, so a fisherman turned detective shouldn't.

BLACK EYE! WHAT BLACK EYE

The ravishing actress takes a jab in the face from the bad guy. In the next scene, she masks her black eye with a pair of sunglasses, but in the following scene, there she is again, back to ravishing as if nothing happened.
A black eye is caused by blood leaking from tiny blood vessels that are injured by the blow. The body takes about two weeks to clear that out of the tissues. When you get a black eye, it stays dark for about two days, fades during the next four or five days, and turns greenish, brownish, and a silky yellow before disappearing. But in movies, a character can fall down the stair and chase down the bad guy or make love the next day. In the real world, you need a few days to heal. A broken arm needs four weeks minimum to heal, but because a movie is only two hours long, characters must heal rapidly.

POISON THAT STRIKES LIKE THUNDER

The victim takes an arsenic-laced drink, within seconds, a concerned, then frightened look comes across their face, they clutch their throat, and falls dead. Very touchy. But then, very unlikely, but it still is a Hollywood trademark.
Acute arsenic poisoning doesn't kill that quickly. In fact, it may take several days. The victim does not develop throat pain, but they vomit and release bloody excretes. Not appealing for the screen, so its better to simply clutch the throat and collapse.


GUNS BEING ABLE TO DO THE IMPOSSIBLE

The actors approach a locked door, aim their gun, fire, and they gain free entrance. Metals used for locks are stronger than that of a bullet. Another wrong gun scenario is when a gunshot at a cars fuel tank blows up the car, this is so not happening in real life. Only fire can inflame fuel not to talk of blowing it up.

SUDDENLY EVERYONE CAN RUN A MARATHON

The hero chases the bad guy across the street, jumps over hurdles, climb ladders and fences, no sweating or heavy breathing. Many a time the hero is usually a cop or private investigator who drinks a lot, eats only doughnut for meal. He never hits the gym. When you are out of shape, adrenaline only takes you so far - a block or two. Same goes for the bad guy.

PRETTY EVERYBODY

You always see pretty detectives and investigators, meanwhile these people are usually pretty for the brains they poses and not their faces.


excerpt from: forensics for dummies - by D.P.Lyle, MD

over to you Nairalanders, what have you noticed in Hollywood movies that are just absurd.

Ishilove
Iceberylin
Twaci
Ollyfad

Happy birthday bro may you acheive all that you set your mind to.