₦airaland Forum

sorry guys, just when i thought i had it all figured out my school slammed our exam time table in our face now i have been cramming for the thing instead writing and for that i will punish the school by getting A's and AB's

harjibolar10:
Chai, political thug. .. Lets go now




Harjibolar was here

welcome o bros

Ollyfad:
Iosprince!!!no updates abi??u want me to start chasing you all over nairaland before you updaye abilet me start warming up!

abeg o i no get strength

blackmarya:
am i in the right place

depends on where u want to be... so where do u want to be?

Nuges11:
Hope I'm not coming in too late. Iosprince (I'm still not sure if that's I or L at the beginning of your username), thanks for the invite, I'm here now. By the way, a head and a boil? Yuck! I want to see how well that'll go down. Nice start.

dude it's and L... but i kinda like the i more

those two are crazy weirdoric lovers. welcome bro.

kitnah:
Following!!

How can you give bj with boil

Nice story anyways!!

weird welcome

Ollyfad:
bj nd boil....uhm!
d show have begin.. act one scene two.....
chibyke nd chibukewich one?

chibyke is coined from chibuke but mistake noted.

Chapter one
Kc eyed the light skinned girl sitting opposite his table. She was staring at the now empty bottle of malt he had bought for her. They were supposed to be on a date but she wasn’t putting in any effort to make it seem like one. No eye contact, no conversation, she was there to answer all his questions and drink his malt.

It has been over six months since his girlfriend called it quits and he had decided to stay away from relationships until he finished his remaining three years academic circle. Currently he was on his one year industrial training, but six months without a girl could be disastrous for any guy his age. For him, a girlfriend comes in handy quite often.
After his six months frustrating relationship hiatus he pleaded with some of his friends to set up a blind date for him. That blind date was now sitting in front of him making him wish he had remained single.

Ever since the girl arrived, she practically assumed that it was his responsibility to do the talking. He told all the jokes—and got only forced smiles.

He gave up and decided to rudely discharge the girl. “Hey! If you will not talk to me you better lift your flatness and get out of here.”

The girl eyed him now. “Have I not been answering all your questions? What’s your problem?”

“You are my problem. You are so dull and boring.”

“Oh. really? Look who’s calling me boring, how many of your jokes have I laughed at since I came here?” this one hit him like a bullet.

“So now you know how to talk, I don’t know you girl but I am ashamed of your IQ”

The girl hissed. “broke ass nigga, money talks. I agree to go on a date with you and all you can afford to buy for me is a bottle of malt. So if I had brought my friends along this is how you will embarrass us.” She picked her bag and strode out of the bar.

KC starred at the girl in bewilderment as she strode to the main road forcefully shaking whatever flesh she had for rear. She stopped a cyclist, took one last menacing look at him, hissed and then told the cyclist her destination.

KC sat down to call the guy who recommended this date for him. “Hello obere? What kind of naughty girl did you hook me up with?”

“Hello KC my man, you said you wanted a girlfriend. In situations like that anybody can come to mind. Did anything go wrong?” obere replied from the other end of the line.

“Everything went wrong! This girl just gave me the bashing of my life in public. I have never felt so humiliated all my life.”

“Guy free women matter jor, I go handle her later.” Obere switched to pidgin.

“I don’t want trouble just die the case, because of money this girl just dey yarn anyhow.”

“Wetin you expect? Na runs girl na.”

“Did I mention that I wanted a runs girl?”

“Na recommendation me do for you o, by the way. On top money matter, I get sure way to make cool cash by this week o.”

KC sat up. “What is it?”

“Guy why are you so dull? You don forget say na election period? All this politheifcians dey find thugs o.”

KC exhaled deeply, frustrated. “Guy thugry is very dangerous and politicians of these days are tricky.”

“No be anyhow politician o. this guy is an opposition and you know oppositions are very desperate and would do anything to win, including spending huge cash and as enterprising young jobless youths we should be here to capitalize on that.”

KC had to laugh at this guy’s humor. “Ok what’s the plan?”

“Call Chibyke, the both of you should meet me in front of the government house ASAP.”

“Ok” KC hanged up and started dialing Chibyke’s number…


********************

Meanwhile inside room 104 (Afghanistan- as it was aptly named) Embrik lodge. Chibuke stared at his girlfriend Amaka, bewildered at her request which was impossible at the moment.

“Baby that’s not possible at the moment,” He tried to reason with her.

“Why? You already had it somewhere else?” She asked quizzically.

“No! of course not, I wouldn’t do that to you,” he placed his hand on her shoulder assuredly. “I have a huge boil down there.”

She gasped, “Let me take a look.”

He shrugged, “Ok” he unzipped and she brought it out. She gasped again, “that must be painful”

“You have no idea”

They both stared at each other for seconds then she started grinning, that kind of grin she grins whenever she had one of those evil genius ideas.

“What are you thinking?” he asked, hoping it wasn’t a dreadful idea.

“I’m thinking of giving you a head.” Chibyke’s eyes widened.

“With a boil?” he asked quietly.

“Yes, I would like to call it erupting with pain,” she was already handling it.

At this point there was no stopping her so he obliged hoping it would be pleasant.

He didn’t notice his cell phone already had 9 missed calls and counting.

Ollyfad:
i was wondering when you would start a new story....
now that you av strtd dnt kip us waiting ooo




am early to the show so i get to see the cast before the show begins .

aww welcome dear, for being first i name one of the cast after you.

dude you are wasting nairaland's bandwidth. .

Prologue
Have you ever been a thug, a political thug? I mean carrying arms and disturbing the area for potbellied men dressed in natives? Do you attack their opponents whilst doing a drive by on motor cycles? Steal ballot boxes and harass others who wouldn’t vote for them? And you do all these and more for how much, Ten thousand? Twenty? A million?

No matter the amount… truth is, you are a stain on the surface of the earth and it is because of you that we never get ideal leaders. When someone pays himself into a position of service, there is a 99% certainty that they would use that position to recover their money with interest. And you—the thug—made that possible.

I am not accusing you of all the political wrong doings in the country, but your level in aiding it is the most unreasonable and unprofitable. If you are going to aid a politician at least be professional about it. Rigging had proven to be a sure political winning method.

Do you know that only 10% of ballot box snatchings are successful? And every ballot snatcher run the risk of getting shot or mugged or even burnt. All political thugs out there are youths—leaders of tomorrow.

Do you also know that more than half the politicians out there were political thugs in their youths? And that while you go about jobless-ly doing there dirty works, their own children are chilling in five star hotels in some European country where they get to study high tech courses but in our very own universities students get to live in jam-packed hostels, learn in a five departments in one classroom, get threatened to by textbooks, pay money for assignments, spend extra money for practicals they don’t benefit from and then resort to sorting their g.p to Everest.

And just so you know. As a thug. When you die in the act of thugry, your family members will be too ashamed to come and pick up your body and the guy you died for wouldn’t give a damn win or lose.

No need to drag this on and on, but know this. The country is already wronged so adding to the wrongs will never make it right. –by T.A ORIJ [a fictional politician and thug]

i will use this space to mention some names. now note these are my friends and role models scattered all over nl so i will go and search for them first. so don't be dismayed when i don't list your name--one comment can start a friendship.

iceberylin, lilmaxfidel Nmeri17
edogho mozele debonairprinx
Elparaiso vickyfrancis1 myndd
sleekbody proficienc rondo325
Positivist akposb teamplayey
aboyaj abimbawealth mhiztemmie
jhimmy kingblingz annbabyhot
Nuges11 aprilwise ballantyne
Hiroshize missmossy
amsoslim
obstead200
aboyaji
princessa
larrysun
jezuzboi harjibolar10
repogirl
royver
ishilove
vijon
eunisam

twaci

ollyfad came early to the show

I have another nomination based on readers. .. she is wonderful amd tells you what is could be done to improve you... ollyfad

I nominate larrysun, ishilove

D9ty7:
We need a catchy name for the thread, am not good with naming or giving titles.
Think of something

how about "need for critiques" or "get criticized"

I suggest that a standard critique committee be formed to rate and criticize our stories--plus the programmers could also add a rating button for stories and their subsequent updates.