₦airaland Forum

I am still watching to see how GEJ, the meek will be victorious at last. I want to use it and guage God's love for the meek and the noble, vis a vis the weak.

And why has this not made front page? Lalasticlala, why?

Oshlander:
Ututu oma! At the bolded, are you sure you were given such advice or you insisted? That aside, I must tell you that if you terminate the contract as against my earlier advice to continue, you will be charged and I'm equally sure that that policy is lapsed. Please think twice before you continue with the termination. I've told you that you can ask for redate/reinstatement of the plan so that you can continue, otherwise, if you terminate it now you won't get #80,000. It's my professional advise. Don't terminate the plan (mcino). Have a great day!

Much as I appreciate your advice and suggestions, I take exception to your writing my full names in a faceless forum as this. Please, modify your posts and remove my names. I wouldn't mind not getting up to 80k, but whatever is due should be given to me.

Bluffly:
You caused it. Why giving cash to the marketers. When it comes to insurance go to their main hub while you shine your eyes. Insurance is not bad in Nigeria but the marketers and managers are, if giving them the chance.

Well, I was giving cheque until when I felt that the first guy was trusted enough. I gave him cash twice that he never accounted for before he disappeared, but that's not the issue here. I was advised to terminate the policy in their office, and since after that no information from them again

dunasy:
How many years was your policy?

If it has matured, you can get your money.

I had a policy with them and I have collected my money. Try this number 07098767003 ( this was the number I tried, I got it from the receipts given to me).

Also, you can get your money even if you are not in Lagos, as long as they have a branch office in the state you are in.

I hope this information would be helpful.

Cheers.

Thanks! I will try the number. The policy is not mature yet. I had to terminate it and from what I read, I am still entitled to what I deposited, without any interest. That is what I actually want

Amplitron:
If it is this difficult for you the depositor to claim I wonder how it will be for claimants (in case of eventualities).

Most of those people from insurance company's are marketers placed only on commissions. They leave the company once they get better offers. The insurance company's fault is that they hardly update customers when their Marketing Officers change. It is always good to establish a relationship with the company and not just the marketers.

NAICOM (http://naicom.gov.ng/payload?id=66088c7c-1bcd-4503-9284-85ec6f276d79) and Central Bank are their regulators. You can report them as a last resort.

I will do that after exhausting the peaceful channels. Thanks

lakeside69:
As much as i empathise with you, it is advisable that no matter the policy u are undertaking, pls go thru a reputable Insurance Broker. They will not take a kobo from you for their services, they will ensure you get the best competitive rating and ensure you get adequate indemnification in the event of a pay back. I will advise you, rather than use telephone calls, do physical visit to their office and meet their Branch Manager who shall ensure your claim is attended to. A follow up letter to the discussion with the responsible matter will do you a whole lot of good. Wish u all the best.

Thanks bro. I've been in their office in Asokoro Abuja once, before the phone calls, but I will heed your counsel and go back there again

Pls Lalasticlala and all those concerned, help me and do justice to this, so that more people can see it

I am an insurance policy holder with Mutual Benefit Assurance Limited, through one of their marketers. He disappeared after a while and when I saw another of their marketers, I explained to him and he went to their office in Asokoro Abuja to change it.

He collected the premium from me for a while and disappeared again. He told me he wasn't working there again. I went to their office after a long while and they gave me a form to fill for termination. I filled the form and submitted same on the 1st of December, 2015 and got a message of acknowledgment from them, with a phone number attachment.

I have tried to call the number, severally, but it was switched off. I copied a number from their jacket, but when I called it, the receiver told me that he has resigned from the company. As there is no official information from the company and they are sitting on my 80k, please advise me on how to retrieve my money. My policy number is ISP/13/136698/ABJ.

Attached are the pictures of my receipts and other documents to buttress my claim.

"Pornography of propaganda"

The guys as at this night have not talked, but they are still together. The guy has started eating her food, perhaps after going through your comments here. I am contemplating showing this to the wife too, so she can learn too. I don't know what you guys think.

I also think that the mods have been unfair in not doing justice to this thread. I dont beg for front page for recognition, but since this forum has been giving publicity to some not too necessary things, it wouldn't have been a badbad idea to widen the advice base of this story, for the good of the couple and the rest who might learn from their experiences by pushing it to the front page. Lalasticlala, seun and ishilove over to you

thelish:
what is written here, is for ur supposed friend to read. we all want the marriage to go on. Stop using style to support one party.Thanks

Kai, you are harsh on me o. I am just trying to help. Only the guy reads this, so I don't need to take sides. All the same, forgive me

chigoizie7:
I am speechless.

*she envisaged this whole thing and suggested they quit, yet he was blinded.

Haven said ^^^, don't think can say any other thing other than tell the wife how he feels.

Let him tell her that her nagging attitude is resurecting the past event.





Btw, the wife though. Why nagging him?
His kind gestures almost saw u through life, his kind gestures brought the both of u together. he stood by u when ur own family were against u. the least she should do is to pay him back with happiness all her life.

Why preventing him from being good to others?

After he must have told her all that, then, he will know what next to do.

A good angle to it. They need to talk. The guy needs to be open. Imagine how far and deep you guys have gone to help this couple

johnny1980:
op when you are ready to accept you are the one involved. I would advise. stop playing us like kids.

You have been interchangeable using "us" for "them". which indicates you are the one.

You are wrong here. I told the story in first person, but stated clearly at the end, who it was that has it. However, it doesn't matter whose story it is. Your advice is what is needed here. Whoever it concerns will learn from it and then you would have saved a marriage

Una don dey make this matter look somehow o. Well, I can only talk about the ones I know. One thing I am sure of is that they still love each other. These guys need help to be able to continue. My friend is not finding it easy, but as a man he has no options. He is even bit happy with the wife for involving others in their marital affairs, including me, maintaining that he used to confide in me for advice and not to intrude. Anyhow, all I need us his/their happiness. Thanks cococandy for your input. I am sure that he reads all our contributions

ECOTERRORS:
My tribute goes to Whynotthetruth Barcanista Biafraqueen Gaborone Mizmycoli Firefire Mogidi CR77 CSTR Francizy cCndyrain Dearpreye Ellechrystal Priscaoge Oremussanctus Shorty Ifyan Pazienza Nigeriavenom Ezenwammadu Anonimi Tomakint Talktimi Temitemi1 Tit Isrealiairforce Altwireless Obiageli Hinwazaka NDPVF Ochejoseph Introvert
Kodded IbokUtoroh Truckpusher Thesonofmark Phockphockman Serveussnape Jackrich Trailblazer
Melzabull Baralatie Mcino Dunsman Boujaye Cococandy Rose2014 Ugomba
Nwadiuko1 Bayswater

The land is still green
I will keep on modifying anytime I see a patriot

My appreciation... We'll not be intimidated into believing in or succumb to the subsisting scam. Yes, it is not easy but we're equal to the task

MarvellousGod:
I don't see any nagging here.. his wife complains of his closeness with other ladies and you call it nagging?

Hope a wife can call it nagging too when her husband complains of her many male friends?

It all depends. It is an insecure feeling for a spouse to complain of his/her spouse's closeness to the opposite sex or social dispositions. Marriage is not a prison na

PDP supporters are more educated, hence the cultured behaviour. The few educated APC supporters from the south incite those from the north to do the unthinkable.

Moana:
1. She nags and she is jealous
2. He doesnt sleep with her as often as normal couples
3. He is thinking of divorce

This doesnt sound like living in peace to me. They do need counselling

Peace of a grave yard, you mean? I think it has all been pretence, but what do you think the counsellor will do to remedy the situation? The guy is hurting so much inside and needs to let out some steam

MarvellousGod:
You're the problem Op... Your wife isn't comfortable with you keeping those female friends and you call it nagging? Shouldn't you listen to your wife's complaints? Seems to me like you value those friends more than your wife.... They're probably not your colleagues, cousins or for official purposes. They're just friends, so close that you said you're so free with them, free in what way? She must have perceived some kinda danger before she voiced out. . Listen to your spouse, that's why both of you are married... See her complaint as a way of protecting what she has and you'll know the best way to handle it. ..

I have many male friends but if my husband ever complains about my relationship with any of them, I will cut off the relationship. Who is the male friend compared to who my husband is to me?

As regards what she did in the past, it was very bad but she came and confessed to you, you forgave and later married her.. why bringing it back again? This is something that happened even before you married her, years have gone by and you're still talking about it?? Nawa ooo. .. Forgetting a sad incidence isn't easy but please try biko...

The problem I see here is that love is dying in your marriage courtesy of grudges from the past and you seem to be getting comfort/consolation elsewhere hence your not touching her for many months and even considering divorce. .
She has complained and complained, yet you're getting colder?? Why getting colder? Why torturing your wife? After the incidence in the past, has she ever given you any reason not to trust her again? You forgave and married her, Why can't you just let go? If you never wanted to let go, why did you go ahead and marry her? Who knows you may even be reminding her everyday about what she did to you in the past..haba...
Or you're now getting comfort from somewhere else and using the old incidence as an excuse? Never knew guys bear grudges like this.. nawa oo

Make una try make up biko and bring those good old times back..

Nice one. He has married her and should just forget about that very bad past. However, the woman should stop feeling insecure or so and stop pushing the husband to the wall by nagging. The guy is not helping matters by keeping quiet. In a relationship, openness matters a lot. I am sure he will read this

AfroKnight:
My brother, na wa. She may be insecure cos she thinks he's going to get back at her after all these years. Not knowing that her actions could push him right into extramarital affairs.

Jealousy might be amusing in the beginning but after a while it becomes very irritating. Women tend to do such things in excess.

You are very much right. Why she nags is what I don't know, because she would always tell you that get husband does not look outside. Her major problem is that the guy doesn't show her affections anymore, but she is approaching it the wrong way. She just needs to make the guy fall in love again with her

MhizVee:
Mcino,hmm,are u sure u re not the person in particular

Hehehe! I am not. The guy is my childhood friend. The update I shared here is what he told me this morning when I called him. I am at a loss in what to do. The woman has reached out to me, but I don't want to tell her what the husband doesn't want me to tell her. He maintains that he can handle things in his home, but am afraid it could go out of hand. In the heat if what happened before their marriage, I advised him against continuing with the marriage, but he refused. I have drawn his attention to this post and that is why I want the best of advice for him. I would have looked away considering that he ignored my advice in the past, but what affects him affects me too. I can't pretend to be unconcerned, when I will still be among those to share in his problems. Granted, I don't like the woman, based on that past incidence, but now I have to look for the best for my guy and nit what suits my fancy. The truth is that a divorce will certainly affect the guys future, as all his life was built around this woman. However, I don't know how he plans to shoulder the effect. The woman also deserves some pity, as she has no family to go back to. She is a professional and may not jack material things, but will certainly face humiliations from her family

[b][/b] UPDATE
The woman is parking her lots to leave the house, as the guy has refused to eat her food for sometime now. Mods, please help this guy get more advice. He is a member of this forum
cc Seun, Farano, Rocktation, Lalasticlala, Ishilove

AfroKnight:
The guy really tried. A jealous nagging wife is not easy to live with. He deserves better than her but he already made the mistake of taking her back when she cheated on him years ago.

This is the reward. She suspects him because she has greater potential to cheat. The guy should just focus on other aspects of his life. If not, he will get violent one day. This is his cross and he must carry it.

Women think their Jealousy and nagging are harmless but the reverse is the case. A man hates coming home to a wife who gives him stress. How difficult is it for her to keep her mouth shut? Must she nag the living daylight out of him? Now she is just a source of irritation. And some men don't handle irritation well.

Let's pray he doesn't get angry enough to hurt her physically because of her nagging and accusations. Divorce is very final. I don't think it has gotten to that point although he has to tell her that she has pushed him to the point of considering divorce. Maybe her brain will reset.

You hit the nail on the head. Women don't know that while their husbands don't talk, they hurt from inside. No husband enjoys a nagging wife, especially when the husband has been tolerating her past. Marriage is a whole lot of prison

Gurgle:
Yeah I was thinking that. So if she stops the nagging it may be easier for him to forget it. I think he should just let her know how hes feeling so she can stop it. Anyway women often nag their husbands even when they haven't committed any atrocity so its nothing new. Just that the irritation from the nagging is also dragging up previous irritation from before

It sounds like she is insecure because of what happened before which is giving rise to the nagging. So if they just talk about it and come to some resolution it may be better for them. With a counsellor/ Christian counsellor present if they cant agree or if they fight a lot

I don't know o, he should just try and continue for the sake of those children and for the love he had shared with her in the first place. it may have been a mistake in the beginning to continue with the marriage but it doesn't have to continue being a mistake; it could turn into a blessing if they work on it

You cant enjoy a blessing fully, until you have known pain and suffering

I don't think they should divorce

Hmm! To think that you are not yet married... You are gifted with wisdom in marriage counseling. The children are the key thing here, else divorce wouldn't have been a bad idea.

MhizVee:
I am not married yet but i can never forget about twhat the bible says,moreover the guy knew what she did and all of her past, she did this when dey were not married,i dnt think gettn a divorce is a better option,i think it will be wise enough for the guy to stay with his wife till the anger wears off,he shld learn to forgive,all dat happened,happened in the past

You are right, though. It has happened and is irreparable. However, something has to be done for them to quit the accompanying emotional torture. Both are suffering, as a result of that

Gurgle:
Well I haven't married so I cant advocate divorce outright unless its something like physical violence, or something where one of them is going to die at the hands of the other

If the feeling that youre talking about is that she slept with the American fellow, then I can only advise that he makes a conscious effort to forgive her and try not to think of it too much because its a mistake that has already been made and she cant do anything about it. although its not easy but he has married her and invested a lot in her, so even if he feels he doesn't love her at the exact moment there are other secondary reasons that could keep him there until his anger clears

like the children's welfare

It is a good one. The wife's recent nag is the reason for resurrecting the whole feelings, though he has been struggling to cope with it. My take is that since he could endure it then, he can still do it now. Especially now that they have kids. I think the guy made a mistake by continuing with that marriage. But he confided in me that the woman actually envisaged this and pleaded with him for a quit, on that account but he refused. He was so blinded and now he is facing the reality of that insight

MhizVee:
Wait o;the couple in question,are they christians?

Yes, they are. Why do you ask?

Gurgle:
Ok. So I think they should go and see one

It doesn't sound like it cant be solved but they have some issues that need to be addressed to prevent future heartache

He should take heart, all is well

OK, thanks! Outside seeing the counselor, what else do you think they should do? How does the guy get over that feeling and what actually do you think is the implications of their divorce? Don't you think it will make them happier?

Gurgle:
I don't think so; it sounds like a rough patch

Have you visited a marriage counsellor?

They had been living peacefully and never had the cause to visit a marriage counselor.

Sorry, I had network challenges. It is a true life story and the couple is in dire need of support

We became love mates later and decided to marry. Her first year was my final year and we utilised it very well to achieve excellent results. Her family is a an average one, but her mother is dead. She was going through hell and had to work to raise money for her upkeep and academic needs. I tried to reconcile her with her father, a faculty officer in another university, but her step mum wouldn't allow that. They refused to train her and I took it upon myself. After graduation, life became difficult for me as job was not forthcoming and her needs increased as the demand for her academics arose. We quarrelled at intervals and in one of the cases a man living in US came in. While we were quarrelling, I made sure, she never lacked money as I gave her the usual allowances when due. I am a born hustler and could still afford to train her even with no job, albeit tight situations. We manage our finances, but it was better when we were students.

To cut the story short, within the three weeks that we were having issues, her new boy friend had changed her wardrobe, phones and standard of living in no small way. She went as far as sleeping with him, but in all couldn't cope with betraying me. She came back and confessed, but that was after I had sent her a text message asking her that we make up. It wasn't easy for me, but I accepted her back and had to break her relationship with that guy. I paid him for all that she spent on her and returned those returnable. I fought gallantly to be able to do that, as the guy in question was better in all ramifications. She initially hid many things from me, but I smartly unravelled all the hidden things.

We are currently married with two kids and are not doing badly. The problem is that she is being unnecessarily jealous and nags whenever she sees my free attitude to other women, even when they are married. The thing pains me a lot because I never cheated on her. We dated for 8 years before marriage and I kept to her. Beside her nag, I haven't really gotten over that incidence. Before her latest nagging character, I have already hated her and sometimes spend as much as 3 months without touching her. She has complained and complained and each passing day, I grow colder. I really loved her and could lay my life for her, but presently do not believe in love, courtesy of that incidence. At present, we are suffering in the marriage and the thoughts of divorce keep recurring in my head. Should we do that?

A true life story of my bos.om friend