eyinola:
am a mature guy of 35 my fiance resides abroad making me to be lonely and bored..i dont wish to go into any dating now because i wouldnt want to break any womans heart as my relationship is intact with my bae...all i seek here is any mature lady also in my shoe,lonely,divorced,widow,not getting the maximum satisfaction..if u are game drop me a message with ur watsap number to oeyinola@yahoo.com

and u think this is the right thread for ur advert? Hmmmm

lusciouslyon:
The ministry is growing. please if you are not married, stop disturbing my mail. please

Why are u guys putting ur phone numbers here naaaaa?.....just PM him, he'll get back to you

stinflame:


please take a course on proper speech management.

Mind your speech online ,because not everybody is as tough as you to absolve insults and blames.

If what op typed isn't fabricated,then i must admire her courage in seeking for help.
Coming out open isn't easy.

thanks alot for this ma/sir.....I choose to ignore his sarcasm

Almaigaa:


No one insults you. But the truth will always hurt.

I'll learn to love my husband sir....thank you for your sarcasm....but why are you following me around my threads and exhibiting foolishness up and down? I know why already...u can continue sir...lol

Almaigaa:



Madam smart lady, how come you are not smart enough to make your marriage work?

I'm wondering why my marriage issues is such a big bone in ur throat....ur already crying more than the mourner ...weldone sir...when ur done here,u can go and look for another thread to showcase ur immaturity and stupidity sir.... thank you

emmanuelpopson:



can I pm you??

naaaaa. No need for that sir

Bighead9:
Na wa oo. What's going on here?

still the same person...u can't fool me with ur multiple identity..I'm too smart for ur pranks sir... thank you

Almaigaa:



You see your life, you are just confused. Abeg, go home and love your husband.

I won't reply u again after this....I'm sure you know that I know u too well,with all ur negativity and sentimental posts here.. u can continue to rant.when ur done, u'll give up on my case.. ur opinions doesn't matter to me at all sir....thank you

Tosinex:
struggling with love or struggling with acceptance!!!

I really don't know what to think sir ...but all will be well hopefully

Atlanticfire:


You have opened multiple threads on this subject. It is somehow worrying.

Just note that there is no perfect marriage and there is no perfect partner. Everyone just tries to make the best out of their marriage.

You might think that you lack love in your marriage but the problem might be actually different. Are you sure that you are not depressed? Depression can make one feel unloved.

It might also mean that you are lonely, if you are lonely then get something challenging to do. You can take online courses or start a new business or learn a new skill, anything that will challenge you.

The idea is that you should try to find out what exactly is the problem. Speak to your husband about how you feel and both of you should try and figure out what the issue is. You will find it easier to solve the problem once you have been able to figure out what the real issue is.

The last piece of advice I will give to you is that you should not try to find solace outside your home or with friends or in alcohol, just calmly try to figure out the problem and resolve it

thanks so much for this....I actually opened multiple thread on this to see if I'll be able to find reasonable advises like urs from any of those thread...once again, thanks so much....I'm grateful... I'll work on myself and my marriage as advised

klenton:



nice response dear, pls dont mind the idiot, some people's foundation are faulty from birth and since everybody can chat they vent thier frustrations all over the social media, some times its not thier fault as one cant give what he doesnt have.

infact,I was weak to my bones when I read it. Unfortunately,they won't understand my plight,no matter it insults....it is well

Almaigaa:



This retired Olosho, stop whoring all over Nairaland, opening threads everyday, telling us how boring your marriage is. Do you think marriage is all bed of roses? Your phone numbers are all over dating section. But you are here claiming that your marriage lacks love. Which man will give love and attention to a wife that behaves the way you do?

Go home and love your husband alone. We are tired of seeing your threads.

thanks so much for ur insults.... I'm very grateful sir

crackhaus:

I'm glad... At least there'll be no more threads from you on this same issue.

yes sir...u can see that I'm no longer commenting... thanks so much for ur concern

Almaigaa:



You are nothing but a losed woman. After seeking for attention on Nairaland's dating section, you are here claiming that your husband doesn't love you. Your phone number ,is all ,over dating section. You kept cheating on your husband with small kids on this forum. You are a disgrace to woman hood. Your husband deserve a better woman. I pray he send your Olosho Ass parking.
Trash.

it's a pity that you can speak to me in such tone.....I have nothing to say to u than THANK YOU SO MUCH

crackhaus:

This thinking is why you will keep on opening these threads and not get solutions.

ok oh... continue investigating me I'v gotten the advices I need from Wise minds...so I don't think ur sarcasm is needed anyway

emmanuelpopson:


hmmmm

but u wish u are available

oh well

sweetmelanin:
OP I understand how you are feeling... and trust me, as you get older, it will affect your sex life in devastating ways.
I know the love isn't there anymore but do you at least like him as a person? If so, you guys can still live together in friendship. There are marriages out there like that (mine inclusive)... sometimes it's hard to walk away from a marriage when there isn't a " tangible " reason like domestic violence, cheating etc... society can be so judgemental and it really sucks. I totally get you dear.

thanks sis

crackhaus:

Is it love that's the problem or your marriage is boring?

i guess u don't understand that when love doesn't flow in a marriage, everything becomes boring

Sirvingeo:

Most virgin I know enjoy their marriage .

oh well,it's not just abt sex....is marriage all ABT sex? Plssssss

stinflame:
Love is deep and only those who were able to fully understand it's nature live happily ever as couples.
Questions you need answer are simply,was he your choice or he was forced on you?
Also since you have already gone into the union,you just have to look at the brighter side of things.Specifically what made you attracted to him.
Also it won't be easy try to live your life,don't be always conscious in doing things,don't always try to please.
Just live your life and be you.
Am sure the crazy feeling of not feeling your marriage will go.

okk... thanks so much for this

PrincessNZ:
Nonsense talk.






To the OP,

Either you or your husband or both of you married for selfish reasons. Love is permanent when two people marry for unselfish reasons.

if ur "selfish reasons" means financial or monetary gain,well I'm sorry to disappoint you...we are both from reputable and we'll to do families....so I'm wondering what else u literally mean by selfish reasons

fulaniHERDSman:
There is no permanent love in any marriage. It comes and goes. It's childish to expect fairy tale romance in marriage. Reason is that a lot factors come to play in marriage. Pressures from child rearing, homekeeping, friends, relatives, finance, business, work place, etc make it impossible for love to constantly be there.
Another angle is the reason you married in the first place. People who marry for selfish reasons do experience your present situation.

in selfish reasons,u mean? Oh pls,u know nothing much abt me,so don't think I'm one of those golddiggers ur familiar with

Sirvingeo:
Are you sure you married a real virgin .

is that the best u have to offer? dumb question sir

Easybela:
if advice must solve your problems then,both of you must visit a counselor. You alone can't solve this problem.

hmmmmmmmm....

farady:
So OP, how did you meet him? What attracted you to him? What made you fall in love with him? If you can answer these questions then you closer to your answer.

ur right

Ariza:
I read a thread here sometimes ago where Men were advised to marry and learn to love those who love them and only use and dump those they love.I asked how does one learn to love but my question was left unanswered, the ones who tried to answer only danced around it. No procedure or How to was provided and I laughed. How men bask judiciously in so much ignorance amuse me! They believe women learn to love so they can do it too.But only the wise one would ask how women easily divert this so called love on their children as soon as they are born neglecting the fathers. Was the love ever there?


The truth is you can never learn to love, you can only learn to appreciate.Love is not something you can create but Gratitude, you can. The misconception comes when people mix up love and gratitude. Contrary to what we see movies like a man learning to love the woman he was force to marry, No! he only learned to appreciate and live with the woman after his brain has been reconfigured by a terrible situation that might have caused him to lose the Good woman.

Op, you can't learn to love. You can only learn to appreciate, learn to be with and learn to accept your Man. In this case, look at the positive sides of things, compare his good qualities to what others do not have and accept him. I wish you luck.

thanks alot for this

Tony142:




How long did u and your husband dated before marriage? Abi ona no date?

most times, it's not how long ,but how well... pple date for years b4 marriage and still end up getting divorced...that's what I'm trying hard to avoid

Tony142:




How long did u and your husband dated before marriage? Abi ona no date?

most times, it's not how long ,but how well... pple date for years b4 marriage and still end up getting divorced...that's what I'm trying had to avoid

totosucker:
If you are a Christian,your duty is to submit to your husband and his duty is to love you. Don't you people buy surprise gifts for yourselves? This is one way you can use to ignite the fire of love in your relationship. Prepare his best meal for him. Be an obedient wife, Take a stroll together, See a movie together, Dress sexually for him at home and make love to him when he wants it and generously too. And in return your husband will shower you with lots of love.

I hv been trying to play my role as a wife anyway.... thanks for u warm advices....I'm grateful..ur name though

I got married as a young virgin...probably didnt understand what love was all about then....

I've never really felt love or being loved in my marriage..coupled with some other marriage issues..

I wear the shoes and I know where it hurts...all I need is advices on how to build my love life and not yabs pls...it's very hurtful

MrBrownJay1:
sadly...there is no way to build love where there isnt any foundation for love to grow... the foundation is messed up from the get go. dont believe the hype that people say that you can love someone irrespective of what you guys share/feel for one another, thats a damn LIE!

you should learn to respect this person, learn to stay positive about your not so great position, and do whats right with the choices you've made... but the reality is that love would NEVER cherish from such union.

hmmmmmmmm....deep