seuncyrus:
This is really sad. I read the first part of your story and honestly the best thing would've been to leave your husband and his mother ( if you had the means). I don't even understand how your aunty can say she wants you to leave your 8 month old baby behind.

Right now, the only option you have is to beg your mother in law to let you stay a while ( while you find all the possible means to contact your own real family so you can go to them and begin your life afresh)

Thank you so much

Ohemababy:
Please let the separation happen now that your still very young.
The guy is not interested nothing u do will make him want you.
Please dear dont worry at all. It was just a mistake.
Go back to school. Put in all your efforts and graduate with a very good grade.

In fact as you are in there in school, you eyes will be open you go see better!
All these low self esteem you have will evaporate.

Once your done with good I pray you get a good job that makes mockery of whatever you get from him that makes you think your world should revolve around him.

Please dear find a job for the mean time. Save. Study hard and get into the university it's not that expensive at the federal level.


God will guide you!

Thank you so much

zainyrazzy:
Dear op, get a job and move on with your life it's so obvious you are married to yourself. So stop forcing it. Don't leave your child with anyone you will regret it later. Is your aunt The only relative you have?

Yes she is the only relative I have here in Enugu and I also have 2 uncles in Lagos ( her brothers) but I don’t have their contact

ifyalways:
Carry your daughter and go back to Cameroon na, were you banished from there too ?

It’s a long story can’t even remember my house and no a single contact with my family over there

Mineisgrace:
I am more bothered about your aunty that wants you to leave an eight years old girl behind

She said her father is alive so she can stay with him and have been begging her but to no avail

I’m not depressed about him coz I don’t care if the marriage is over coz he has never loved me but am depressed about leaving my daughter with his mother

IamSalt:

I just don't understand how people will be seeking advise for what they have solution to.

You are depressed about what exactly??

Lemme leave you with this adage, "kill yourself because of one kpekus and see so many kpekus attend your burial wishing they had the opportunity to share it to you for free". Just look at the adage from a woman perspective.


He doesn't like you doesn't mean there is nobody out there that won't like you. Hanti, you will not be talking depression if you know how sweet it is to be free.

I posted here about a week ago about my husband doesn’t love me coz it was a force marriage due to pregnancy coz he is also a member here I taught it will be a good idea 4 me 2 post so we can both get good advices on how 2 work on our marriage so things could be better, but after him seeing my post on here he was angry why do I have 2come in here and talk about his family matters he made the matter worse accusing me of cheating even doubting if our baby belongs to him n he told me it was over between us , I’m heartbroken been crying as usual tears is now my food so yesterday he called his mother and told her dt I went online 2 insult her dt she is a wicked mother etc etc she was angry saying after all she has done for me And I paid her bad by being ungrateful, I even showed her what I wrote here 2 prove to her dt I didn’t say anything bad about her only said what she is always telling me and I also ask her for forgiveness still she was mad she didn’t talk to me the whole day and dis morning she has told me to go back to my aunty house with the baby and she will come after her when she is two years old and I have spoke to my aunty she has agreed for me to come but alone she want me to leave the baby with my mother in law I have begged her to bring my baby with me she insisted dt she doesn’t want my baby at her house now I’m just confuse on what to do.. I don’t want to leave my child she is only 8 months .. I’m very confuse my bp is high I don’t know what to do

I prefer both

Am using Johnson soap with amino baby secret cream and is good on my daughter skin

Thank you

dominique:


Loads of bullocks. Pregnancy you don't approve of? So she should keep risking her life and committing murder till you approve? You're even sicker than the 24 year old you're advising.

The moment you have unprotected sex, you've indirectly approved of pregnancy. You have no rights to put the blame on anybody other than yourself if you're saddled with an unwanted pregnancy. If you're too daft to protect yourself, then abstain from premarital sex completely. The moment you consciously have unprotected sex, you've trapped yourself with pregnancy.

Birth control is NOT a female's responsibility alone

Just got mine dis evening

Thank you sir

Kenoxman:
Just get a job or start a small biz so u can take care of urself and ur baby. Once he notices dat u no longer depend on him for survival, he will start giving u ur respect as the wife. It may not make him to change and start loving u, but at least u will have ur respect in the house and dat's what u need right now. Stop folding ur hands and sitting at home complaining, get up and do something. Even if u hav no money or where to work, talk to ur people. There is no how u will explain ur predicament to at least 3 persons and u will not find help. God will surely use somebody to help u. The worst thing dat can happen to u is keeping silent. Open up!

To fix my broken phone

Thank you everyone for your advice

Thank you all 4 giving me some strong advice some of it was hard 2 hear , I really appreciate

Thank you sir , am not working at de moment but am looking forward to get a job like sales girl when my daughter turns 1

Femsyn:
In his head, you probably tried to trap him with pregnancy, hence the behaviour.

See, I've said it before, and I will say it again.... "the society is not fair on women". Single women need to get a hold of themselves, cos if you both make a wrong decision, with the male spearheading it, the society will still blame the woman. Unfortunate, but that's the reality.

Your family didnt force you into marriage. You forced yourself by allowing an irresponsible man get you pregnant.

As it stands, you're the one sad and depressed, while he makes mockery of you with his numerous girlfriends.

What do I advise now?

Separate and face the consequences thereof, or keep praying as usual.

Make your decision fast, as you're still young. Whatever decision you make now will decide how you lead your future.

Question... What do you do to support yourself financially? Hand work? Education?

Thank you sir , he is 24yrs he works 4 his elder bro in his appliances shop in Abuja , Am in Enugu n his in Abuja. My parents lives in Cameroon, it was my aunt when she got married she brought me to Nigeria with her when I was 13yrs, she said I have to endure the pain because I put myself in dis condition. his family are treating me well n his bro pays him 50k a month he doesn’t send any money for our upkeep n it is my moda in law who take care of everything but am not happy with her coz she doesn’t want to advice my husband when he is acting bad towards me

JeffreyD1:
22 years oh lord

How old is your husband?

What does he do for a living?

Married you and kept you in family house in the (village) I guess?


The bitter truth is your husband is never ready for marriage he was forced to do it don't expect love and care from forced marriage especially from a guy that's not working or has something doing yet most people will say why didn't he use his brain then when he was releasing inside he didn't know
Most people are guilty of this same thing, because some abort or some take postinor 2 it looks as if they're wise

My only advice is I don't know about your parents I would've advised you take your child and go to your parents house when his senses are back he will come begging



Quick question how are his family treating you in times of upkeeps, baby foods and clothing and hope he do send you money

Am 22yrs n married with a kid . We dated 4 just two months n I got pregnant my family forced him 2 marry me coz of de pregnancy, we didn’t even get time to know ourselves very well. He later did introduction n paid my bride price I moved with him in his family home , we stay like stranger he doesn’t talk 2 me unless it’s necessary ,he keep late night he goes out every weekends n comes back in de morning , he has other girlfriends he has given dem my number 2 insult me , he has no love for our baby 8 months old he doesn’t play with her n he has never put her pictures on Facebook or WhatsApp but he put his nephews n nieces and his friends children there but no his own daughter, since September 2019 he traveled 2 Abuja to work 4 his elder bro in his appliances shop he doesn’t call me but he calls his moda every single day dey will talk for hours without him asking 4 me , when I call or texted he will ignore , his bro, his wife , kids n him visited us for Christmas festival he didn’t even talk to me until dey left on de 3rd of January. his family are not saying anything and dey blamed me saying I put myself in dis mess coz I was supposed to focus on my education n not following him n my family are also saying de same dt i run faster than my shadow n I wanted 2be married so I should endure , I’m just tired of dis marriage I cry everyday not knowing what to do. De reason I brought my problem here is coz he is also a member in dis platform he gives people good advices about marriage but he doesn’t practice de same in our marriage n pls help both of us with advice on how to work with our marriage. Thank you