@ Steve_101  I find it VERY DISAPPOINTING that you would justify this behavior due to economic conditions.  I am not Nigerian.  However, I personally know first hand of several cases in which foreigners entered into a marriage with false intentions.  Irregardless of economic status, innocent lives (including children) have been affected by this selfish act.  Some of us really do marry for love.  So if the other party involved is in it just for papers, then they need to seriously reconsider this act.  Don't forget - we reap what we sow.  

I also feel as though churches need to do more to prepare couples for marriage. Even after the marriage vows have been taken, IMO churches still need to check in and see how things are going. Just because you buy a new car, it does not mean you can drive it without any type of maintenance.

The leading cause of broken marriages (especially in Naija) is that far too many women want to wear trousers these days. We all know who the head of the house used to be during time of our parents and grandparents. But these days too much education, media influence, career development, and all sorts of negative exposure have increased feminist tendencies such that wives are now insufferably stubborn and unsubmissive. '50 - 50', 'equality' 'beside you, not behind you', etc. Those are the unpragmatic things they cling on to. Invariably, when a full-fledged man with a healthy ego marries a misguided woman with such mentality, it is only a matter of time before the marriage collapses.


Response:

While I agree with some of your comments, I must say that back in the day - men use to be men.  Therefore, there was no need for women to take over and get in the drivers seat. Now you have "men" who wants to stay home and be taken care of by women.

Anyone?

@ Kitty Kat: I agree with your thoughts. A smart thing to consider is why is that person single. For example: I know of several women who are highly educated, and financially stable with a child (ren). The only reason they are now single parents is because after the spouse received his Green Card or Citizenship the husband walked away. So , should this woman now be banned from a loving relationship? Again (as I mentioned earlier) I see nothing wrong with dating/marrying a woman with children. It's up to the individuals involved.

@tpia , thanks.

Marrying a woman with a baby is a matter of choice. I see nothing wrong with such, as long as both parties love and care for each other. I must say that I am bothered by all of the attacks on single mothers. IMO just as some men are concerned about marrying a single mother, Ladies , the next time you start dating a man with children, ask him this question: "why are you not with the mother of your child(ren)?" Listen very carefully , this could tell you a lot about the character of the person you are deaing with.

Do you know of any successful marriages in which one spouse is a JW while the other is not?

Thanks for the response. I don't know much about the denomination. However, I've "heard" that they only consider marriage when the person is of the same fate. There is no doubt about the sincerity of our relationship. But I also don't want to waste time on something that may go no where.

He is Jehovah Witness, I am Catholic. He's Nigerian and I'm not. We are both divorced with children. He's a wonderful person, and great with his children as well as mine. I love him deeply. Do you think this can work? He knows I will not convert to become a Witness. But he 'says' we can still make it. I'm not sure if he is telling me the truth or not. What do you think?

I agree.