₦airaland Forum

My Wife hate to see me sad or angry. She would always do everything within her power to see me and her children happy.

Thank you my Angel. I love you so much

This morning, I woke up to the smell of fresh Agushi soup that she specially prepared for me with her own money.

I ate to my satisfaction and prayed for her.

The soup was very rich and thick but she could only cook a small portion. So we only ate it for breakfast.

We had sweet potatoes and oil for lunch which was also prepared by my lovely wife.

Yesterday, my Boss made us work under the heavy rain and refused to pay us our salary until we complete the work.

When I got home, the dinner my wife cooked would not be enough for the children to eat so I went out to buy ₦300 akara to hold my belly until the next day.

Before I said let me remove my clothes and take my bath, my children had pounced on the small akara I bought.

I would have harmed my children last night if not for the fear of God in me because that was the only money I had in my pocket.

I went to bed angry and hungry. My wife tried to calm me down and make love to me but I cursed her and we ended up fighting.

The only protein she would manage to add is boiled egg that she sliced into two for us to share as if we are small children.

Even the accommodation they provided is nothing to write home about. There is no mosquito net on the windows. I have been using my little salary to treat malaria almost every week.

I cannot continue to serve under such a wicked family like this. All the workers are complaining not only me.

My mouth cannot say everything I have experienced since I started working here so I don’t lose my job. I just pray I find a better place of work. May God help me.

I always make sure all the jobs I apply for come with feeding and accommodation.

The reason is that I have a family of 9 to take care of. I cannot afford to waste money on transport and feeding daily.

Since I started this job, I noticed my Madam use to serve her workers from a different Pot while She would cook special meals for her own family.

I have been working here for almost a month and she has never served us Meat or Fish and this is a family that buy cartons of Chicken and Fish with Beef weekly.

My Mother-In-Law also gossiped that I don’t buy biscuits, mineral drinks or noodles for my children because I am stingy.

The truth is I prefer to prepare healthy snacks for them. Which I told her several times

My Wife sells groundnut and kuli kuli which the children enjoy eating. I buy suya and fruits when I can afford to for them.

See the popcorn and coconut snack I made for them just yesterday.


I don’t want to be the type of man that chase his Wife’s family away but I am tired.

My Mother-In-Law has been tormenting my Marriage for years and I have been enduring praying she would change her ways.
But for how long?

I did not know all this was happening while I was at work.

When I came back I greeted my Mother-In-Law but she hissed at me like I was her enemy. She started singing some wicked songs about useless husbands in our native dialect.

I called my Wife aside and asked her what was going on and when she told me, it took the grace of God not to slap her.

My Wife is the type of person that would be very hungry but she would say she is okay so that you would not get worried.
I have given my Wife money several times to buy clothes and ladycare for herself but she would end up buying things for our children instead.

I asked my Mother-In-Law how much she bought the new set of pants and she said each 1 cost ₦5000 and she bought 5 pieces. Total of ₦25,000.

I immediately counted the money from my savings and gave it to her. Even though I did not believe that was the price she got them for.

I have to post pictures of the pants. Do they really cost ₦5,000?

Why would a Father buy pants for his mature 24 years old married daughter if not to insult her husband?

My Family stay in a one bedroom and my Mother-In-Law came to visit.

When my Wife was putting on her clothes, my Mother-In-Law noticed that my Wife had used white thread to sew her pants. The pant looked old and rough according to her.

My Mother-In-Law called my Father-In-Law in the village and that one sent money and asked his Wife to go and get new set of underwear from the market for their daughter.

This size in the picture above costs ₦50.

When I asked the seller why the milk is so cheap the man said as people Dey buy Beef for soup other people still Dey buy Ponmo.

He did not give me any reasonable answer.

Only God knows the type of dangerous chemicals they mixed to make this so called Milk.

They call it YO-YO MILK

Sellers here in the North rebag it into small transparent Nylon and sell it for ₦50-₦200 only because of the size.

A lot of parents here buy it for their Children because it is very cheap.

When you mix it in water it tastes like baby powder mixed with groundnut oil and sugar.

Peak milk Refill is now ₦4,000, very expensive and it won’t last up to 1 week for my family of 9

My Children love drinking hot tea in the morning. Especially during raining season. I rather give them only plain Lipton and sugar than mix this YO-YO milk for them.

May God help us all

Aleem26:
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You will surely bounce back by God's grace but is that your sitting room or your church

Amen. Thank you Sir

That was our Living Room back in the Village

Once the Bandits are defeated by the special grace of God, I will move back to the village with my Family.

Special shoutout to my wife who has been supporting me through this struggle. She has been so strong, caring and hardworking.

She started fried Groundnut business and has been supporting the family generously. She would cook and serve us without me bringing 1kobo and she doesn’t complain because she understands.

I love you my Angel.

I used to go fishing with my friends. My wife would smoke the fish and it would last for months.

To buy dry fish in this Town is luxury.

See the big fish I caught far back in 2016. My village River is really blessed

Life has been tough since we moved from our village to town.

I am earning 230,000 monthly but I cannot save because of food expenses

My children that got tired of eating chicken and eggs in the village…now when my wife adds boiled egg to their food they are always very happy.

A crate of Egg here is ₦5,100
30 pieces of Egg for 7children and 2 adults
It doesn’t last up to a week. I cannot afford to buy it every week.

This was our backyard in the village. Egg used to get rotten in our kitchen because we were tired of eating.

My 2 bedroom house that I struggled to build with my sweat for over 6 years.

My 3 plots of farming land

My Wife’s farm and our backyard chickens

Some of Our furniture and clothes that we could not pack because of fear of carrying too much load

Everything gone.

I am halfcast. My Father is Nigerian and My Mother is from Cotonou.

When my Lebanese Boss appointed me and my colleague to drive his Car all the way to Cotonou, I was very happy. I saw this as an opportunity to finally visit my Mother’s home land.

We were supposed to drive down to Lagos then my Boss would take a flight and meet us there.

As we were cleaning and preparing the car to leave, my Boss son came to me and asked me to give him some of the groundnut I was eating (THANK GOD MY COLLEAGUE WAS ABLE TO BEAR ME WITNESS) I brought out few pieces of groundnut from the same nylon I was eating from and gave the boy to eat.

Few minutes later, the little boy was still playing in the compound when he started vomiting. We rushed to the boy and saw his face red and his neck was swollen as if the vomit refused to fully come out of his throat.

Thank God we were able to rush the boy to the hospital and they treated him. I told them I gave the boy groundnut to eat and my Boss wife slapped me and scratched my face.

My Boss arrested me and I spent 13 days in the prison. All Glory to God, I was released after much begging. My wife and my mother even slept outside their gate to plead for my release.

My Boss made sure I paid back the little boys hospital bills of which he claimed was ₦700,000.

He did not show me the receipt but I agreed to pay just to get my job back and continue to put food on my family table. WORST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE

He promised to debit half of my salary which is ₦107,500 monthly. I continued to work hard for his company with all honesty.

This man did not pay me 1kobo for 4 months. Other staffs were getting full payment. I kept quiet hoping God Almighty will touch his heart.

During that 4 months I struggled to feed my pregnant wife and 7 children. I cried to God and asked him why he would watch an innocent man suffer this injustice.

I finally received sack letter from the company. That was when I walked up to Boss and asked for my half payment for the past four months. He was owing me ₦430,000. He threatened to arrest me and said I will rot in jail.

All I said to him was that My God in heaven will judge him and I left the company for good.

I had already made up my mind to take my wife and children back to our bandit attack village but in less than 1 month I got another job to the glory of God.

Please my people be careful in all you do. The Devil can take you unawares . Who knew ordinary groundnut would cause me pain and depression for months. May Jehovah continue to guide us

The Rules and Regulations in this house is too much.

1. We must call the Landlord and Landlady Daddy&Mummy.

2. Wake up by 5.30AM for Compound Devotion.

3. Each room will take turn to sweep compound and wash toilet/bathroom. You must clean and sweep morning, afternoon and evening.

4. We must not fry palm oil inside kitchen because Daddy Landlord’s wife has asthma. Even if mummy Landlady is not in the compound, don’t fry palm oil !

5. We are not allowed to cook with gas, only kerosene or charcoal.

6. Daddy Landlord will use his special padlock to lock the gate by 9.00PM. God help you if you’re not inside the house by that time, you will knock and Landlord family will not open. No Tenant has spare key.

7. I am sharing the room with my wife and 7 children. I cannot be romantic to my wife in the room so my wife and I started bathing together early in the morning.
Daddy Landlord called compound meeting to harass my wife and I because of this.

8. No playing of worldly music in the compound. No loud sound at all. Your television set volume should be very low. My children cannot laugh or play in the compound.

My biggest regret is that I paid 1½ Year rent because I was desperate to rent a house for my family and no Landlord wanted to accommodate a family of 9. We still have 8 months until the rent expires.

I am currently working in another town but my wife is always complaining about Daddy&Mummy Landlord. My children are not happy in that house. If not for bandits, I would have moved them back to the village.

Hausa food is highly medicinal. We do not pack meat or fish to enjoy our soup.

The highest you can add is dried fish and that is optional.

We prefer to eat meat separately eg Suya, kilishi , Dambu Nama etc

Masa&Miyan Taushe (pumpkin soup)= ₦500

Tuwo with Miyan Kuka and dried fish= ₦800

I have entered the Calabar’s woman canteen to eat a few times. The food is good but I love the Hausa food also.

Eba & Soup= ₦1,200. ( I have forgotten the name of the soup, please remind me )

Stew Rice with meat & fish= ₦1800

Pounded yam & Egwusi = ₦2000

I noticed that to eat southern Food you need to add a lot of Protein like Meat fish or Chicken to enjoy it but it is not the same in the North

Growing up in the North I didn’t really take note but I just realized that

Yoruba restaurant —> Yoruba+Igbo+Hausa Customers

Igbo restaurant —> Igbo+Yoruba+Calabar Customers

Calabar restaurant—> Yoruba+Igbo+Hausa+Calabar

Hausa restaurant—> Northerners

Just last month there was a small riot in the company I work for.
The Hausa woman that cooks in our Canteen serves only Northern food and soups.
We have 70% Northern workers and 30% Southerners.

The South boys usually prefer to leave the company and go to a restaurant far in the village just to eat lunch everyday. I have never seen them eat our food.

The company had to bring in a Calabar woman to cook for them after much protest. This woman’s food is more expensive but they don’t complain.

Since we moved to this town from the village, my wife has been complaining that she is tired of staying at home doing nothing.

I don’t have enough money to start up petty trading for her so we decided to look for a small farm where she can be growing vegetables to keep her hands busy and money in her purse.

Last week, we began looking for free land to use until we found one just about 45mins from our house. The compound was fenced round with a gate so we had to knock until a man came out to open the gate for us.

He introduced himself as the caretaker. He was naked except for a very tiny boxers that almost looked like women’s pants.

My wife and I greeted this man. I laughed and told him in our language that he should go and put on proper clothes as he is standing in front of a married woman.

This man refused. He said why should he be ashamed of what God has blessed him with. I did not want to argue with the man as he is far older than me. I just told my wife to stand outside while I went in to inspect the land.

We negotiated that he would collect ₦5,000 during each harvest which seems fair.

I told my wife I don’t like the caretaker, we would have to look for another land or wait till I get enough money for her to start trade and she has been squeezing her face.

I feel that for that man to disrespect me, a married man like that in front of my wife shows he is troublesome and we might end up fighting.

The man also looks roughs and he is a smoker from his appearance. I don’t want someone to pin my wife in the farm.

Zonefree:
OP's wife is below 23 years with 7 children. Ask OP when he started sleeping with wife, you'll be surprised.

I am only 6 years older than my Wife.

I did not marry my Wife as a virgin. I was trying to make her my girlfriend when she got pregnant for another man who later abandoned her with pregnancy.

I paid her bride price in full with another man’s pregnancy, she unfortunately lost the child after a few months. That child bore my name.

Before you insult Northerners and our lifestyle, open your mind to know the reason why we do what we do.

I came back from work yesterday to see my Wife’s younger Sister in my house.

I was surprised because no one told me she was coming. I greeted and welcomed her.

I later called my Wife aside and asked her why she did not inform me that her sister was coming to pay us a visit. That was when she broke the news to me that the girl was 3 months pregnant and had to leave the village because of shame.

My Wife begged me and even called the girl to come and kneel and beg me to allow her stay until she puts to bed.
I was very angry at my wife for that.

I would love to help the girl but the problem is

1) My Father-in-law is not aware that his Daughter is pregnant. Only my Wife and Mother-in-law knows.

2) My Mother-in-law has not called to plead with me to let the Girl stay under my roof. My Wife asked me to call their mother to confirm but I think it should be the other way around.

3) I am currently managing a one room apartment with my Wife and 7 children. The place might not be conducive for a first time pregnant Girl. Feeding her is not a problem.

4) I am afraid I would be the one to pay her Medical bills, antenatal and all. When I asked my Wife she said her mother would pay but I don’t believe this judging from personal experience.

5) What if the girl suffers miscarriage or complications? God forbid. I might be held responsible.

Please advise me on what to do. My creator sees my heart that I would love to help but I am afraid. Should I let her stay or send her away?
How do I do this without losing the respect of my Wife and Mother-in-law. What is the best way to help the Girl?

Sharpsharp00123:
u are a typical example of the saying that "the only thing that controls a poor man is his prick"

After 7 children n in abject poverty u are still thinking of touching your wife?

Don't u think of how u will get a better life n take care of your children?

Don't u think of your future and that of your children?

Thank you for the insult sir.

My wife and Children are living the best life I can give. We are not hungry we are not suffering.

I earn 150,000 Naira monthly and take good care of my family for your information.

See our dinner last night. None of my children goes to bed with an empty stomach

Since Bandits attacked my village last year, we had to abandon the 2 bedroom home that I built.

We have moved into the main town and I managed to rent a small but spacious room for my growing family.

The problem is that me, my wife and children all sleep in the same room now. This has affected the Romance between my wife and I.

The older children sleep on the floor and our last 2 babies sleep on the same bed with us. We demarcated the bed with a small curtain for privacy.

I have to make sure the children are asleep before I can touch my wife but I always feel the older children are light sleepers. Since we moved here I have not been successful in showing love to my wife.

Out of frustration, my wife and I started bathing together around 5a.m in the morning but the landlord warned me seriously and said such a thing is forbidden in his Gida so we stopped.

I work Monday to Sunday during the day so I only have night time to spend with my wife. I am losing my happiness.

The last time I visited my Inlaws my wife’s father and me are from the same plate.

Distance really brings respect. I thank God almighty

All thanks to God I was able to get a good job after I moved out.

I am now earning nothing less than ₦150,000 monthly.
I can buy what I want and eat well now.

I have gotten a place for my wife and children to stay. We are now living happily together.

All glory to God.

This was the biggest mistake of my life. We had no money and we had to depend on her parents for everything.

I received direct and indirect insults from her father, mother and even the last born of their household.

It got so bad that one day her mother served us soup and as we were eating, she dipped hand into my soup and took out the piece of fish inside and claimed she mistakenly added it to my plate. I cried that night.

I would work morning to evening on her father’s farm without pay. I swallowed everything with hopes that I will find a job and move us out.


Few weeks after we moved in, My wife started behaving funny. She would ask me for money to buy things which she knew i did not have.

When I told her I don’t have she would start quarreling with me. This is something that never happened under my roof.

Her mother began to control her. Since we moved into her parents house she never allowed me to touch her. I became so frustrated that I wanted to use the small money I had to rent a short time hotel for us so we could spend time together as husband and wife.

My Wife cried and accused me of wayward lifestyle. She reported me to her mother and they held a family meeting for me.

I became ashamed for lack of privacy and watching my life waste away. I finally packed my things and left. My wife or her family did not even beg me to stay.

Last year we had several attacks in my village and everyone had to runaway for safety.

I took my wife and children to my mother’s house and decided we should pick up our life from there.

My wife was very sad and said if I love her I will move her and the children to her own family’s house.

At first I rejected this idea but she stopped eating my mother’s food. She was pregnant and was losing weight fast. I became afraid that she might lose the baby and her life.

She later had a miscarriage and accused my mother. It caused a lot of troubles.
With the little savings I had, we moved to my Inlaw’s place.

Kwakwa (coconut)- ₦30

Debino (dates)- ₦20

Kuli kuli- ₦20

Groundnut- ₦20

Sugar- ₦50

Garri (1 milk cup) - ₦100

Ice water- ₦30.

I removed 300 naira from my salary today and enjoyed this quick meal.

I didn’t even calculate my budget or family wahala for the month, I had to use this sweet meal to calm down first and it reduced my high blood Pressure .

Use that money you are saving to eat wetin Dey hungry you. Na the one wey enter your belle be your own toh!

I rinsed the marrow and bones thoroughly to remove all traces of blood.

Season with spices and enough pepper
Boil for 30 minutes.

Serve and enjoy with cold kunu kwakwa.

This food helps relieve joint pain and headache. I enjoy taking it after hardwork at the farm

Biscuit Bone and Marrow- ₦100

Onions- ₦50

Maggi, Salt, thyme, pepper ( Already available in my home)

Cold Kunu kwakwa- ₦ 50