₦airaland Forum

As usual
But why is he always on black outfit.

Image123:
But Tinubu has the capacity to do all the things wrong in Nigeria. We all know what we are doing na.

Obident spotted na Tinubu matter go kill una

Your own is even better, my own na 4kids she left for me.

8136267088
Salahu Opeyemi
Thanks

Twoclans:
The stories that come out from Egypt and Arab countries are heart breaking and scary.I don't wish my enemy such experience.

Surprisingly, her elder brother even gave her full supports and deceived me as if he didn't know anything about it. Very unfortunate!

1D
2D
3B
4C

Thanks very much to everyone for your advice.
I now realized today that she has followed her friend to Egypt.

I can now realize that there's nothing in this life anymore. I'm facing a very serious challenges now. May God Almighty help me.

Double0h7:
Your great idea is to further traumatise the innocent children!? How could you be so heartless 😱

Thanks

My last born has not been feeling well since her mother left house. Pls what do you think I can do?

Kobojunkie:
Whatever you are going through, those children are going through so much worse than you are. Their parents are no longer together, and the last thing they need is a father who will try to make them more miserable by changing their lives and making them feel even worse than they do right now about no longer having their mother in the picture. You were once a child... so try to put yourself back in the place of that child and imagine how you would have felt then if you woke up one day and your mother was no longer there to take care of you. Let that guide you in helping your children better cope with and adjust to having you as their primary caregiver rather than their mother.

Those children do not deserve to be punished or made to suffer for what happened between their adult caregivers. They don't deserve to look back at this time in their life and be filled with sadness and regret. They are children and will never have their childhood back once it is taken from them by trauma and abuse of any kind. They don't deserve to have to spend their adulthood struggling because any one of their caregivers chose to have them suffer when they didn't have to. If you have to, get movies out there about fathers raising mentally sound children, too. Watching movies about women doing so can help you learn how to train mentally sound children, too. Books are out there that you can look up and read/listen to if you need help. 🥱🥱🥱

First thing, do all you can to not have to disrupt their life. They should get up every morning to go to school and come back home. their chores and homework, and play as they have always been able to. If there is no adult supervision to watch them when they go outside, then they can stay in the house after school until you come back and watch them go play for no matter how short a time it may be. 🥱🥱

Second, do not lie to them and do not hide the situation from them. Whatever bitterness you feel towards their mother is your personal issue with her and not for you to trauma dump on those children. Just explain how sometimes things do not work between father and mother, but that does not mean they are no longer loved by either their father or their mother. And their mother will get herself together and contact them eventually.

Third, if you have a family member in the area— preferably a sister who is currently unemployed — suggest she spare you about 1- 3 months of her time during which you will pay her to help pick your children up from school and ensure they have their meals each day. During that time, she can also help teach the older kids how to make their meals on their own — simple foods like boiling rice, or making eba, and maybe running simple errands within the neighborhood (assuming they do not already know how to do that). (You can do major cooking of meals like making soup and stew for the week, over the weekend.)

Catch up on your children's school details, documents(hospital, identification, immunization records, drug allergies, etc.), while you are at it, so that in case of emergency, you know where everything is. Make out at least 1-3 hours each day to hang out with your kids at the end of your day, talking and listening to them and their daily experiences. (Make friends with your own children.) You can also watch a program together while you all hang out. Ensure to carry your youngest children because children that age need hugs and cuddles a lot, especially when things change around them that their fragile minds are having a hard time wrapping themselves around. Show interest in their lives and in their studies so they know they still have a parent present, even though one is currently not available.

Make sure to contact their mother and demand she take care of child support from her end, beginning this very month. If she tries to be some sort of deadbeat mother to her children, report her immediately to the proper courts and send a copy of the summons, if possible, to her parents' house.

---

There are lots of spaces online where Single Dads who wish to be intentional about raising their children well go to find support from other single dads.

Thanks so much.

Kobojunkie:
You want him to punish his two eldest children for what happened? Why is it that the more time passes, the more it seems Nigerians never learn anything? Those two are children and are not supposed to act as parents to anyone, including their own selves. 🥱🥱🥱

2. Children have yet to learn what they need to, but you are already looking to force them to learn skills and into adulthood even before they have recovered from the traumas of childhood. I don talk am many times... Nigerians hate their children more than they hate themselves.🥱🥱🥱

You know this from the fact that every single suggestion you have given here is not to help the children grow up less traumaticized into better people and citizens of that country, but to help OP ease the burden that is the children off of himself, their so-called parent. It is always about making life easier for the parent concerned or taking care of the parent unit... the well-being — mental, physical and emotional —of the kids is almost always an afterthought. 🥱🥱🥱

Thanks but what exactly advice do you want to give me now? Pls

Caaz:
You see those motivational quote you just dropped for the op,truth's e nor go ever dey easy for him no matter how hard he tries.... 4kids nor be moimoi.
Hes now a decorated single father.

Hmmmmnnnn... Nawa oh

dawnomike:
Where do you reside?

Ilesha, Osun state

Gotocourt:
Hope all your assets documents are intact , you will be glad she left later📌💯.

Yes, all are intact Sir.

I

A4alpha:
Move on already as the only reason why this woman will come back to you is if she fails in her attempt to relocate or being rejected by her lover but the truth is she had since emotionally checked out of the marriage long before now so don't even blame it on the fight because it is in line with her plan to create problem as an escape route and you fell for it.

Don't not allow yourself to be used as an option and don't rush into another marriage for now and the next 2 years atleast.

Good luck to you mister.

Thanks

Kobojunkie:
That usually means she has been having problems in the relationship with you but you both never came around to resolving it, and she eventually decided it best to check out of. It completely. I will tell you this ...your primary focus at this point should not be the woman who seems to have planned her exit for a long time and according to you, checked out emotionally long before this. Your focus should be those children ---:their mental and emotional health. 🥱🥱

Again, they are your children and it is also your job to care for them and ensure to greatly minimize the blow of what happened on them 🥱🥱🥱

Thanks

ayomilore:
How old is she and has she been acting like having extra marital affairs lately?

She's 37 and she's not been acting like having extra marital affairs before. But I noticed recently she changed emotionally and whenever I asked her what happened she used to say nothing.

Onegai:
Where is she right now? Like, who is she staying with?

Reach out to her family members and tell them what's up. Share your concern with them and assure them that what you're worried about now is her welfare and safety.

That fight and the passport isn't a good sign, but let's keep a cool head.

Focus on the kids for now.

Give it some days and let her family speak to her and find out what's up, if she was planning on leaving her marriage and starting afresh elsewhere, why, etc.

Try not to get defensive in the next few weeks and months (you're going to be accused of a lot, some will be true, others will be rewriting of history and some will be lies). Keep a cool head and get your family around you.

And for the love of the Lord, do NOT go running to another woman. If you need help with the kids, go and call your family members. Don't jump from frying pan to fire.

When my family called her this afternoon, she said she's leaving me forever that she's traveling abroad by next week. I've called her family and explained everything to them, but til now I've not seen any reply.

Kobojunkie:
How are the children? Have they eaten? How old are they? When do they begin school?... 🤔🤔🤔

They've eaten this morning. though they are not happy this afternoon, they refused to eat.
Their ages
4
7
11
14
They're resuming school tomorrow 5-01-2026 by God's grace. But I'm very sure they won't go tomorrow.

We4all:
Your wife only left the house and you are already crying. What will you do if she decides to leave you forever?

When I keep preaching to people not to give birth to a football or basketball team, they won't listen.

Imagine if you had just a kid, or at most two....you won't even bother if your partner leaves you because one or two kid can easily be taken care of.

This is not the issue of taking care of the children, I'm the one taking care of them before, what I'm saying is that she betrayed me.

Bahamas95:
She left you a long time ago but you were blind to see the handwriting on the wall.

Exactly, so this is what some people are passing through. This is serious.

dawnomike:
Sorry about what you had to go through... I really understand how crazy it feels for you.

Be strong brother as time will ease it all off.

Reachout if you need someone to talk to.

That's problem I have for now, I don't even know what to do. Nobody is here except her children.

manuelkel:
No be small freedom , but e no go easy for am shaa.
4kids men, keep your heads up OP, the Lord is your strength....thank God for liberating you from the shackles of jezebel.

Amen, thanks.

immortalcrown:
Is the passport's issue date recent?

Yes

immortalcrown:
Is the passport's issue date recent?

Yes! I'm so tired and confused Sir, pls pray for me

Please house I need your help, the wife that I've married for over 14 years now just left me today with 4 children. We didn't have any issue before until 31st of December, 2025 when I discovered a photocopy of Nigeria passport in her bag and fighting started when I asked her what was going on. We've been dragging this since that day but today she confessed that she's already done with me and I should not worry about her anymore. She left my house this morning o. Today is the most saddest day of my life. Pls pray for me and my children.

Obi could have be a better candidate for PDP but he chooses to follow those expired politicians

mactoni91:
Refinery wey Omo oni le go still tell owner to go back to their village

As they chased away Dangote refinery àbí?
Na tribal problem go kill you.

Ask for the type of food she's eating before, get it and deworm for it.

destinychildolu:
It's drug Lord we want or no one else. It's Yoruba turn

Did you mean our people that developing India? Because I think they're the only drug lords that I know.

No 11... Portable