SavageResponse:


But if one of your cousins suddenly becomes a state governor ot federal minister tomorrow I'm sure you will do everything possible to identify with that person!

I have positioned relatives, but have never felt the need to "identify" with any of them for help. I am content with the most that I have, and that's all that matter to me. I do not need crutches from anyone to make advancement in life. Any true favour does not come from man but from the supreme being.

I also have no issue with anyone trying to identify with a successful cousin. Life should be by choice and "per head".

No need condemning people's choices or tagging others as "terrible" because their ideologies do not conform to yours.

We can all live on our own terms under God's blue sky.

All the best

It happens when your so called extended family doesn't have anything to offer. Nobody wants to associate with parasites

mamagee3:
Hi all, why would anyone not want to be close to their cousins or their aunts but are close to their immediate family ?

And is it strange for there not to be a cordial relationship between cousins?

Its not by force besides you dont know what their family dynamics are..

P.S. All my paternal cousins are strangers to me, not one would ever get any help from me no matter how little.

I think we all do have those cousins we don't wanna spend too much time around.That one special family gathering where we sit alongside them on a table cracking fake smiles is enough LoL

Kentuforchrist:
to avoid "so u make it before my son,we shall see"

one of my uncle once told me who admitted me to that university that his son wrote Jamb four time without been admitted to the same university.
imagine, to be orphan no easy o.
just to avoid their trouble shikena

mamagee3:
Hi all, why would anyone not want to be close to their cousins or their aunts but are close to their immediate family ?

And is it strange for there not to be a cordial relationship between cousins?

People are wicked. Let Love Lead.

humberjade:
While it might not be the case in many families, if one finds himself where there are not so many progressives, the level of jealousy tends to be high. Even when the well-to-dos try their best to be good, the evil ones find means to cut them down. And since the mind of man is generally deep, nah to avoid all like plague.

To me, my parents, siblings, their kids and my son are the only family I have got...for anyone to break into this cycle, he/she needs to prove that he/she is worth it. Note: even a trustworthy friend is family to me.

I can't allow my openness and caring attitude expose me or my boy to danger...everybody sabi as him family dey structured physically and spiritually. Experience is the best teacher.

If you want your eyes to be opened, read what this person wrote twice.

saphiere:
Most of us don't just like wahala from extended family.
The smaller your circle the less your worries.

That's why Bugatti has only two seats.

People associate with those they can gain something from. That is the new culture among Nigerians.

Because they are useless to me all of them

when the family looks like a competition or when some are celebrated because they are more successful and some are not there yet, then you need to keep your distance. family is overrated.

My cousins and I share healthy relationships, especially the female ones (no incest intended) but we gist a lot even about intimate topics without feeling out of place... These cousins are relatives from my mother's side. As for Father's side, they have proven to be do irrelevant to us, they've never been useful (No insult intended). But I feel that once in a while, they should pay visit and make themselves known.
I once asked a cousin from my dad's side for a job and his response was not the usual complain of no job, rather he was comparing the job situation of his children to mine, I got the background message, since then, I'd rather everyone should be on their own...

Family drama

Herrmes:
Binance works in Nigeria?

Yup. It does

Lemmy123:
My cousins and I share healthy relationships, especially the female ones (no incest intended) but we gist a lot even about intimate topics without feeling out of place... These cousins are relatives from my mother's side. As for Father's side, they have proven to be do irrelevant to us, they've never been useful (No insult intended). But I feel that once in a while, they should pay visit and make themselves known.
I once asked a cousin from my dad's side for a job and his response was not the usual complain of no job, rather he was comparing the job situation of his children to mine, I got the background message, since then, I'd rather everyone should be on their own...

its usually like that my moms side are friendly but partenal ppl dem be badbelle ppl

very irritating culture.

georgeakins:
People associate with those they can gain something from. That is the new culture among Nigerians.

I don't judge anyone, everyone has their own way of seeing this. But from my experiences, Extended families tend to bring their baggage, such as competition, Jealousy or needed attention, but i also gain from them, by learning how to be wiser, intelligent, and more patient.

Some Cousins are also unreasonable, especially the way they demand for money, and one should know how to kindly say no.

Some extended family have different dispositions, that i don't feel safe or comfortable in their presence, so i keep my distance.

Other extended families envy what you have but i over look that, the only extended families i stay away from are the ones who do not show the ability to reason or who seem controlling. hope that helps, thanks for other comments, its illuminating,

When your extended family wants to control you through constants manipulations, or would not reason soundly, i.e is always dishonest, then, it is no good.

What i am sure about, is that,

I don't cut extended family off, i only give a healthy space, for sanity sake and out of respect.

I appreciate any family with good reasoning and who has self respect.

I appreciate those who made one a better person, even though they may not realize it, also those who make one grow, i can never abandon them even when they are poor.

brainmax2000:
its usually like that my moms side are friendly but partenal ppl dem be badbelle ppl

I swear

mamagee3:
My post finally made the front page after so long.

constellations my baby

saphiere:
Most of us don't just like wahala from extended family.
The smaller your circle the less your worries.

Exactly, the country has created limited opportunities for only the smart working ones. Thus expanding your circle without care will attract more responsibilities especially from those with sense of entitlement.

saphiere:
Most of us don't just like wahala from extended family.
The smaller your circle the less your worries.

Exactly, the country has created limited opportunities for only the smart working ones. Thus expanding your circle without care will attract more responsibilities especially from those with sense of entitlement. Other factors, could also be dispute within the families either from the parents or the cousins themselves.

Maybe see finish


Smh

LORDKing001:
I believe in Jesus. Can I get 5k from you awaiting your reply

Lol

Wolfeye:


Yup. It does

aight. good looking.

JaceBlaze:
I think we all do have those cousins we don't wanna spend too much time around.That one special family gathering where we sit alongside them on a table cracking fake smiles is enough LoL

Haha after d fake smile,backstabbing and gossip continue ..

stacyadams:


Haha after d fake smile,backstabbing and gossip continue ..

Yup,especially those cousins who never achieved much in life...very conniving set of people.

JaceBlaze:


Yup,especially those cousins who never achieved much in life...very conniving set of people.

Huh Jace, how mean?

Anyway, I also think we all have uncles you always have to buy beer for

TMKsouth:


Huh Jace, how mean?

Anyway, I also think we all have uncles you always have to buy beer for

Isn't it the truth though? I know people who avoid being around their cousins because of the reasons I just mentioned.

I know right? "Eish reka two ke tlo bona next time" ...and next time you see them they feign amnesia

JaceBlaze:


Isn't it the truth though? I know people who avoid being around their cousins because of the reasons I just mentioned.

I know right? "Eish reka two ke tlo bona next time" ...and next time you see them they feign amnesia

Lol , mine don't even mention payment, it's like we're duty bound to always quanch their thirst.

Yoh, the jealous cousins thing, I haven't noticed it with my cousins but I know some of them don't get along but I never get involved. Although I'm in the news business, I'm actually not very nosy - can u believe?

Askies maan, that you've got some nasty cousins, or where u just being general?