₦airaland Forum

Op, you already know we live in a dominate simp culture with a majority of puzzy weak male species. Focus your energy on you to save the stress of this national morass.

bepositive11:
Unbelievable!

This saying really hit me "only give what you can afford to lose". You may want to keep that in mind next time

He came to my place crying that he need that money to finalise the business he was nearly finishing (real estate) ... I oblige him as my friend ( now I know he is my enemy)


His house locked up with padlock ...his wife shop closed since yesterday..
Since Monday I discovered he couldn't pick calls and when he do... he will say I will call you back... and the background is different from his normal routine


I helped a friend but now he is no where to be found

Many times the best help you can give a man is to deny him help (especially financially). I know many will come at me for this but I don't give a rat's ass. I'm so used to seeing able-bodied men soliciting for financial help nowadays I sincerely wonder where we got it all wrong. How many men seek mentoring these days? You answer that question. It's always about money. How are we different from the women then?
It's always "I need 2.5m to kickstart this business; lend me just 1.5m to add to this amount to clear my goods...." One terrible thing is should you give what you have (say he asked for 2m and you offer 500k as what you can afford), they will collect it o but just forget the money. They will NEVER pay you back.
I see men seeking fish way more than I see men seeking knowledge on how to fish.
We men really need reorientation in terms of our values in the real sense of the word.

I can help any gender but I have noticed that help i give to men are much more appreciated and adds value to our relationship. Although there are a few girls who don't think like majority of girls that I'm lucky to have in my circle. Most are exes and some Just friends. I can support them however and they never hesitate to do same. Now men supporting men is a big deal because lots of guys secretly don't want u to be better than them. That's something I learned way back in my uni days. So ever since I have had lots of companies but very few real friends.. If I observe the relationship is one sided i simply position u to where u belong, down the ladder. True like OP said most guys are quick to take the burdens of the opposite sex just to prove their love lust and in the end they still run to the same guys they disregard for help. It's very foolish and like a poster here said a lot of guys in this generation are simps by default. Whether ur a male or female if our relationship ain't symbiotic i cut u off without any hard feelings. I know what i have done for guys who I don't expect same from because I know their capabilities and I know where their strength lies. I hardly do things i can't do away with for most of these modern girls. But for men i can go all out. Even the ones i have not seen in ages but we still keep in close touch. I believe ur helping urself by helping those who are around u to be stronger than they can be because this life nobody knows when time of famine will come no matter how prepared u think u are u will need someone's assistance one day and who better to fall back to than those u helped climb up.

Had a childhood friend whom we both attended same primary school. We were so close that this guy knows every member of my family and I know most of his.

Fast forward to some years later, guy was working in a financial institution and i later got a job too in a in the financial industry.

I was asked to get two guarantors and my guy started avoiding me as I told him I would love him to be one of my guarantors.
My cousin who is a big boy signed and a stranger whom I knew not from Adam signed the other form for me.

Since after that time, guy never contacted me again. Me I just move on, unfriend him on FB and deleted contact as well.

I believe someday posterity will still make him come to me for help and I will do what's on my mind.

People needs to help themselves first before they should seek help, many people are empty and full of entitlement mentality.......to help is not by force.

We are helping women in the hope of getting pussy in return. No one is going to admit it though but why else would anyone help women?


When it comes to helping women, you won’t hear any excuse. When it comes to helping men, you’ll hear “nobody owes you anything” “people need to help themselves first”

BMathew:
Men Helping Men to become a Better Men.
Please, People with deeper understanding should kindly review this with me.
A lot have been going through my mind as touching the way men lives their life; (I just said their lives, meaning left with Individual's decision).
I'm laying my emphasis on "Why men are not helping men to become a better men"? Listening to what alot of men out there had done for our other gender compare to their reactions towards thier fellow men then we can bold say the hardship we have now is caused by men(cus focus is wrongly placed).

I am not saying you shouldn't help other gender but let's see this together; If the assistance you've ever render to a lady is being compared to what you've ever done to your male friend (positively), can we rate it?

Note, I'm not trying to belittle any gender nor gender biased.

I'm just thinking out loud, if we can help our fellow brother the way we "mumu" over these ladies trust me by now most of our men would have been a better person achieving purpose.

My female friend posted something on her WhatsApp status yesterday stating that, You see Abuja ladies with iPhone12, designer shoes and bag with the salary of 35,000naira per month, is with the same salary? "what about that"?

"Another guy told me how his boss built a house for a lady he slept with once"

A man can swear Heaven on Earth that he had no dime on him if his fellow brother seek for assistance but they tend to show off, spend without even expecting anything in return for ladies.


Without vain repetition, When will men start Helping Men to become a better men?

Greed, pride, and jealousy

ishowdotgmail:
Nobody owe you anything! Work harder my brother

and who told you working hard only gets you there lol

OP never lose millions of naira to him paddy na why e sweet for him mouth.

OutisComputers7:
This new generation of men are huge Simps

Giant fvcking simps. I wonder what the future will look like

Smart men roll with smart men, and one thing about Rich men is that they never give you money unless they know you are an asset to them, else you will dealing with someone who will be expecting an handout. Nobody cares o, you either have money or have something to offer.

BMathew:
Men Helping Men to become a Better Men.
Please, People with deeper understanding should kindly review this with me.
A lot have been going through my mind as touching the way men lives their life; (I just said their lives, meaning left with Individual's decision).
I'm laying my emphasis on "Why men are not helping men to become a better men"? Listening to what alot of men out there had done for our other gender compare to their reactions towards thier fellow men then we can bold say the hardship we have now is caused by men(cus focus is wrongly placed).

I am not saying you shouldn't help other gender but let's see this together; If the assistance you've ever render to a lady is being compared to what you've ever done to your male friend (positively), can we rate it?

Note, I'm not trying to belittle any gender nor gender biased.

I'm just thinking out loud, if we can help our fellow brother the way we "mumu" over these ladies trust me by now most of our men would have been a better person achieving purpose.

My female friend posted something on her WhatsApp status yesterday stating that, You see Abuja ladies with iPhone12, designer shoes and bag with the salary of 35,000naira per month, is with the same salary? "what about that"?

"Another guy told me how his boss built a house for a lady he slept with once"

A man can swear Heaven on Earth that he had no dime on him if his fellow brother seek for assistance but they tend to show off, spend without even expecting anything in return for ladies.


Without vain repetition, When will men start Helping Men to become a better men?

You know why men don't help themselves. It's because they cannot exchange sex for help, as they usually impose on women.

Funny, isn't it?

Can you see how entitled and twisted the thinking of men is?

man shall leave by his sweat .. na Bible talk am right from time,, God cause us right from the beginning of the world ,, not on another man sweat
...

abobote:
It's wired that way, people think of short time benefit/pleasure, which they ladies can offer. And they are seeing as weaker sex, so its hard to resist assisting some one with soft voice, with those soft melon pointing at you

hard for softies like you

MEN DO HELP EACH OTHER, IT IS A WRONG ASSUMPTION, BUT JUST THAT MOST TIMES IT IS PAID FORWARD NOT WITH botty.

Natural law is People of means will always require someone with skills, Nigerians are not trustworthy which is why it's everybody for him sef, No be this same forum that people are taking loan and not returning intentionally. Guy get a skill, all these simp talk and all, means you have lost touch of reality, Nobody sends nobody.

But you can learn the hard way sha

adesegun121:
See one Reason

Rubbish Twitter capping.

chinchonglee:
My own worst pass everybody own..

I work for/with my brother in a start up company but the profit coming in from the start up is huge that you'd think the company has been existing for years.

This dude can let me make side income from the company.. he also handed all the finance of the company to a lady he was shagging while i do all of the mental and physical work. I didnt complain tho. He was busy buying venza for the girl and dashing all other girls money, i was jst looking at him.

I managed to raise my own capital and decided to take him by surprise and resign since i knew i was the pillar of the company because baba is lazy. He doesn't even knw much abt the operations as he is only interested in the profit.

One monday morning(resignation day), I jst went to his house at chevron from my place, dropped the news, gave genuine reasons(yes am that sharp with words and dnt mince word). Baba was speechless and confused and didn't knw what to say. I jst left him, went back to my house and slept off. I decided to take a week off, enjoy myself before I start planning on how to set up my own business.

Omo! See calls on my phone that day both from my dad, mom, sister, brothers. I jst didn't pick anybody's call. My mom came to my house to ask what happening.
I showed her my nonsense flat and told her to compare with that of my brother's duplex in chevron plus he was buying venza for a girl and dashing money to other girls. Also he goes to quilox almost every friday to show off while i continue to live in a stupid flat in surulere.

To cut long story short, baba called family meeting and decided to hand the company's finance to me. Any money coming in or going out must pass through me. And that's how i started seeing side income and other benefits. That doesn't mean I won't start my own business soon.

Bro I really love ur courage..... I love that.. I once put up a thread about how outsiders without blood line can be more positively influencial I. One's life than family... All ya fake ppl wanted to toast me dead

BMathew:
It all looks so real that we were wired that way...
And the funniest thing is that men have developed themselves in such a way that "they want to make by themselves since no one is ready to assist..... "

Men are genetically designed to be at logger heads, women were built to bypass this defense mechanism by utilizing cunning.
Hence if you ever want help from man have this in mind " it all about power play, every man wants something!... If a man offers to help it either to build his power base, subjugate, rally allies, increase his social standings, rarely he gives for Goodwill, learn to position yourself accordingly"

Honor and ego limits your power men, women know this!

Many igbos are exception to this concept

abobote:
It's wired that way, people think of short time benefit/pleasure, which they ladies can offer. And they are seeing as weaker sex, so its hard to resist assisting some one with soft voice, with those soft melon pointing at you

no soft tissue can replace the feeling of crisp notes, my brother.

Starz825:
Guy...rich guys are here on NL...
Some celebrities are here on NL...if you don't know...so just chill....8M is not above what a nairalander can have..

His story could be true..

I lost 5.3 million naira in investment this year...
So no be everybody no wa see money before.

How I chat with you on whatsapp? I have something to discuss with you...


Big boss good afteenoon.Abeg help my life.Can I ask you for something?


Abeg sir..

lukman22:
So that they will be able to buy you beer,club with you. If he help you and you become wealthy like him,who hm go dey buy beer and send errands. �����

Most of them would rather you buy beer for and not so a day of work and the majority won't want to do what you want them to invest in, I can't in good fate invest in your dream (na you dream why I go risk am); all I can do is to show you what I am doing so that you can replicate after cashing out you can finance you dream by yourself. Most people I understand (my inclusive) want to do what we believe in.

Tonnyray:
Many times the best help you can give a man is to deny him help (especially financially). I know many will come at me for this but I don't give a rat's ass. I'm so used to seeing able-bodied men soliciting for financial help nowadays I sincerely wonder where we got it all wrong. How many men seek mentoring these days? You answer that question. It's always about money. How are we different from the women then?
It's always "I need 2.5m to kickstart this business; lend me just 1.5m to add to this amount to clear my goods...." One terrible thing is should you give what you have (say he asked for 2m and you offer 500k as what you can afford), they will collect it o but just forget the money. They will NEVER pay you back.
I see men seeking fish way more than I see men seeking knowledge on how to fish.
We men really need reorientation in terms of our values in the real sense of the word.

Hmmm... This hits differently. Can I have a conversation with you sir?The mentoring aspect you raised is so important. I will love to learn.

donprinyo:
Many igbos are exception to this concept

Igbos have it in culture, which I like, traditionally people support each other, this forum makes it seem it's a general thing that men don't help each other, in the US no one sends you, we are more communial in Africa and help each other alot so I have no idea what OP is talking about. Obviously you will often have friends who spend on money but that's a reflection on OP's network and not a general

One in a million question.

I remember when I was about starting my biz, I discussed with some peeps(relatives) about it and pleaded for support, they said OK.

Time reach for me to start the business, I went to them one after the other, they all claimed they don't have money.
Honestly, these are rich guys o, I mean people who can give hundreds of thousands comfortably.

I told them to loan me if they can give me, even as low as few tens of thousands, they said they don't have.
Few days later one of them that claimed they don't have bought something worth double of the amount I requested for as loan for a man of God.

I don't want to mention friend's own, if relatives fit f.up, who be friends?

I locked up and rallied round, sold my gadgets(laptop etc) to boost the capital(money) due to money spent on business premise etc.

Today, I'm grateful to God and I have learnt, all help comes from Almighty God.
Another thing I noticed is that, it is easy for someone from another generation(e.g boss, uncle, aunt etc) to help than someone of the same generation(e.g cousin, friend etc).

Person wey go help you, na only God know am.

Note: I'm not condemning anyone because people will help who they choose/want to help, na their money.
After all, I have gotten helps from older relatives that supersede whatever help I would have gotten from relatives of same generation or friends.

I'm only contributing to this post/topic.

Perhaps they think they might not get anything In return from their fellow Men lol.

Let me share one secret a much older guy (in his early 80's now) told me. He said true rich men who made money legitimately do not give money even to their own sons to start a business. They loan them money. He narrated how his own grandmother who was a successful chain mamaput businesswoman in Ibadan loaned him N500 to start off early in the mid-70s. Money he had to pay back with interest.
Corruption is what has eaten deep into the system and the rot even in our thinking and value system has brought men to their knees.
The decay is evident.

donprinyo:
Many igbos are exception to this concept

It exist in all tribes.

Well, it may be more common in Igbo sha, don't let me use my own case to cancel out the numerous ones.

Hmmmmmmm!